Uh.. why can't I get it together?

I suggest a girlfriend

Not helpful, Millar, if the simple act of talking to another person is hard. Depression can be a bitch, but why not start with something small? Go to a fave spot---even if tis by yourself---sit for a bit and recharge (try to recall the last really happy moment you had)

I'm not trying to be helpful. If you can't motivate yourself then what the hell are you asking for? If you made it far enough to type this question on a messageboard I figure you probably have enough energy somewhere to go outside and find something worthwhile. It's a matter of realizing your own situation and who put you there.

Millar is on point there.

I have had this many times. Nothing seems worth it, nothing seems any fun. Anhedonia they call it and it's a very common symptom of depression. I do recommend revisiting the things you know you really, really enjoy - I'd play Louis Prima and Pulp and Al Green and, read Wodehouse and Calvin & Hobbes, watch some Simpsons, that kind of thing, even though it didn't seem too appealing, and I usually enjoyed it some. I'd also get out of bed IMMEDIATELY on waking, because if I stopped to think then choosing what to do or motivating myself to do any of it became nearly impossible. Make plans for days and weeks, in writing. Reward yourself for getting things done. Include entertainment/fun/going out in the plans. It takes some doing, but if you don't do things you can get into a horrible downward spiral.

I know none of this can make you move, some days, but I've found it helped some a lot of the time.

I think I might be adrenalin dependent.

My current work style is to be unable to do anything until a deadline approaches when suddenly the motivation kicks in. I'm a bit worried that it wont one day and I'll be sitting helpless at my desk thinking 'Ooops. I really should have done that'...

I always find making plans & having things to look forward to helps me. Force yourself to do things & think about what you might actually enjoy, or even try things you have never done before. If you don't enjoy them at least you can see you tried, but then you move on to the next thing & so on. I would also suggest seeking some professional help if this is how you feel most of the time.

If it's physical lassitude then it may not be depression anyway.

Otherwise Martin is OTM - simple comforting things are a good idea.

as bobby g would say 'don't fight it, feel it!'

If you drive and have access to a car, skip to next para. Otherwise, I recommend physical exercise (and this advice is from someone who drinks up to 100 units of alcohol per week and smokes roll-ups!). Try walking at above average pace for about half an hour, ideally in a "pleasant spot", however you care to define that. Cycling is excellent too. Or murdering a Swingball (my current favourite). Throwing boomerangs and then running away from them on their return works wonders.

Assuming that you are confident enough to travel alone (and that it is safe to do so), get hold of a road atlas that covers a one hundred mile radius of your home. Choose the name of a place that you like the sound of but haven't previously visited. Now get some good music together on tape or CD, pack some essentials and go. If the weather's good enough, wind down all of the windows. Sing along. Or scream along. Yes - this is all something of a cliche (open road + speed + music = liberation, joy, transcendence etc), but I have used this method to fight clinical depression with anxiety syndrome (which made for some brief and sweat-drenched journeys!). It doesn't matter how long you stay at your destination for. I used to get out of the car and roam around long enough to take some photos, or just sit for a while. I just found that being removed from the context of day-to-day, familiar things allowed me to think more positively and clearly. Of course, if driving doesn't turn you on, this advice is worthless. As for me, I still enjoy the odd random road trip with some old O.M.D. or Morphine or Ultra Vivid Scene for company. I could live in my car. All the best, anyways. Lots of great advice in this thread.

Sorry - lots of assumptions in above e.g. that you have the time, minimal responsibilities, the resources etc. Just an immediate reaction to your post based on my own "lifestyle" about six years ago.

Sorry, but Millar is way off-base above.

I'm with Pinkpanther on creating plans you can look forward to - I try to always have something coming up on the calendar, be it a show I want to see or a party or a vacation or just a small get-together.

If you don't like your life, figure out what you don't like about it and how you can change it for the better. I am currently in the process of signing up for night school because I don't like my job. It will take me a few years and lots more loans, but I have something to look forward to down the line.

I am a preachy bitch.

Anyway, I hope everything works out for you. Keep a journal. Read good books. Invite people to meet up with you. Go to a park on a pretty day. People watch.

I realize this thread isn't about depression per se, but again Sarah's 'just do it' apporoach outlined above, while good advice, doesn't take into account the true nature of depression.

Yeah, you're right about that Sean. Personally when I'm depressed, what I don't like about my life is being depressed, and if there's an easy or reliable way to change that for the better when it tends to be recurring.. well, it'd be a godsend wouldn't it.

I'm a huge fan of the driving to random places suggestion, I still do that myself despite being short of $$ constantly and having a broken tape deck.

sean OTM.

millar OTT.

Which one of us is OPP?

I'm ODB.

I'm down with T E P

Yeah, you know me.

I am N E D and I don't care who knows it. ME ME ME.

I'm still DRE.

But I had forg-- *is taken down with hit to the head*

Dude, WTF?

Geez, Louise. Just trying to help. I had problems with depression in high school. I can't say I found a great way to combat that, but I did sleep a hell of a lot to make the time pass (yes, totally unhelpful. oh, well).

Sarah what you have to realize is that there are like about 2 people who actually ask questions on ILX to receive help. Everyone else just asks questions so that people who try to help can be ridiculed.

I hope that wasn't directed at me, because I wasn't ridiculing what Sarah said at all, only pointing out that that may not be a complete answer.

Actually it was a joke to make Sarah feel a bit better.

And it did.

I just feel like sometimes I try to help on the help threads and get the smack down. Like, "No - wrong! Next!" I know you didn't mean that. I just need to get over myself.

(Except for the other day when I responded to a thread called HELP with a totally cruel joke as the poster in question was in dire need of a sorority reality show on dvd. I really wasn't trying to be helpful there)

Hey Sarah, I wasn't trying to be snarky either, I take the subject quite seriously in fact - You know, it occurs to me that a HUGE part of what's annoying about it is

a) assuming it's not really severe, it does help for folks to say, get off yr ass and do something! take charge, etc.
and yet
b) a hell of a lot more effort is required when doing stuff, and some days, you just don't feel like fighting the good fight.

Dude, I know what I really want. A get-yr-ass-out-of-bed motivational tape by Mike Ditka.

I want to say "...and stop showing off-ah" to this question but since it's serious I guess I won't.