ILX Anthology

Message Bookmarked

Bookmark Removed

This was mentioned in passing on another thread. I'd originally said a short story anthology, I think, but there's no reason it would need to be limited to that. Everyone's a writer, and it'd be dead simple to do: toss a PDF together from Word, snag some Photoshopped Ned & Grizz for covers, toss it to CafePress for printing. It would be a little on the steep side for people to buy in hardcopy because of POD being what it is -- but the PDF (or .RTF, .DOC, whatever) could be made available for free to anyone who didn't want or need to have a paper-and-ink copy.

C'mon, it'd be cool.

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 22 August 2003 14:31 (twenty-three years ago)

I like it. Make it so.

― Alex K (Alex K), Friday, 22 August 2003 14:33 (twenty-three years ago)

So long as I get something in there.

― Alex K (Alex K), Friday, 22 August 2003 14:33 (twenty-three years ago)

I got poems...

― Archel (Archel), Friday, 22 August 2003 14:36 (twenty-three years ago)

I could write a rambling preface...

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 22 August 2003 14:37 (twenty-three years ago)

Ooh, I write short stories! I'd love to do something for this.

― Chriddof (Chriddof), Friday, 22 August 2003 14:38 (twenty-three years ago)

this would be great

― stevem (blueski), Friday, 22 August 2003 14:39 (twenty-three years ago)

My submission is just gonna be a print out of the "I have a big ass." thread, ok?

― Ally-zay (mlescaut), Friday, 22 August 2003 14:40 (twenty-three years ago)

can they be true stories? someone would have to edit mine for piss poor grammar.

― Chris V. (Chris V), Friday, 22 August 2003 14:43 (twenty-three years ago)

and of course I would offer photoshopping...

― Chris V. (Chris V), Friday, 22 August 2003 14:44 (twenty-three years ago)

Reprinting a thread could actually be very cool :) If someone else wants to collate/organize this, go for it, if not, I can do it. I've gone through all the necessary steps before to do my thing, and am going to be doing so again for some other things, so it's no hassle.

Grammar-checking I might could do, but since I just said "might could do," you might not want to trust me not to get down with my hypercolloquialistic self.

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 22 August 2003 14:45 (twenty-three years ago)

I want to contribute the BINGO story.

― Chris V. (Chris V), Friday, 22 August 2003 14:47 (twenty-three years ago)

also you just gave me something to do for the rest of the day. making covers.

― Chris V. (Chris V), Friday, 22 August 2003 14:48 (twenty-three years ago)

I've offered in the past to provide editing and desktop publishing for something like this.

― j.lu (j.lu), Friday, 22 August 2003 14:49 (twenty-three years ago)

Chris, just be aware that only the covers (and not the interiors thereof) can be printed in color (there can be any number of black and white things in the interior, of course, and if you want to put more than two covers together and figure out which to use later, cool).

Woo j.lu :)

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 22 August 2003 14:51 (twenty-three years ago)

http://home.villagephotos.com/2003-7/13884/short.jpg

― Chris V. (Chris V), Friday, 22 August 2003 15:10 (twenty-three years ago)

Holy shit.

― Alex K (Alex K), Friday, 22 August 2003 15:11 (twenty-three years ago)

mahahasterful!

― stevem (blueski), Friday, 22 August 2003 15:12 (twenty-three years ago)

of course we'd have to copyright the Ned.

― Chris V. (Chris V), Friday, 22 August 2003 15:14 (twenty-three years ago)

We should have section titles, for fiction/ramblings/thread reprints, mostly so that we can fit as many catchphrases as possible in there. "And Then They All Lez Up," etc.

And that drawing mark did!

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 22 August 2003 15:19 (twenty-three years ago)

Your Petulance Defies Belief: An ILX Anthology

Edited by Tracer Hand
with an introduction by Strongo Hulkington

― amateurist (amateurist), Friday, 22 August 2003 15:20 (twenty-three years ago)

"Corn Dents Are the Palimpsest of Good Times: An ILX Anthology"

― NA (Nick A.), Friday, 22 August 2003 15:21 (twenty-three years ago)

of course we'd have to copyright the Ned.

*shaking head, quietly laughing* No, I think I'm public domain, really. ;-)

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 22 August 2003 15:23 (twenty-three years ago)

Here's my contribution:

"Meow."

― NA (Nick A.), Friday, 22 August 2003 15:25 (twenty-three years ago)

Neducation is a right, not a privilege

― stevem (blueski), Friday, 22 August 2003 15:25 (twenty-three years ago)

you can use my joke from the everyone's a comedian thread, once I'm finished it

― s1utsky (slutsky), Friday, 22 August 2003 15:25 (twenty-three years ago)

I can see the introduction by strongo now. "this is almost the worst book ever, it's practically unbearable".

― Ally-zay (mlescaut), Friday, 22 August 2003 15:25 (twenty-three years ago)

poems, i can do poems.

― anthony easton (anthony), Friday, 22 August 2003 15:27 (twenty-three years ago)

Archel doesn't write poems, she wirtes porms.

― Mark C (Mark C), Friday, 22 August 2003 15:27 (twenty-three years ago)

INTRODUCTION
by Strongo Hulkington
ilx book in sucking shocker.

― amateurist (amateurist), Friday, 22 August 2003 15:28 (twenty-three years ago)

with a sarcastic footnote by Blount.

― Ally-zay (mlescaut), Friday, 22 August 2003 15:29 (twenty-three years ago)

We should get Ann Coulter to write the introduction.

― NA (Nick A.), Friday, 22 August 2003 15:32 (twenty-three years ago)

She posts as milo auckerman here, right?

― oops (Oops), Friday, 22 August 2003 15:34 (twenty-three years ago)

PREFACE
by James Blount
zing!

― amateurist (amateurist), Friday, 22 August 2003 15:34 (twenty-three years ago)

And every copy should be printed in Millar's blood.

― NA (Nick A.), Friday, 22 August 2003 15:35 (twenty-three years ago)

and come with a free bag of dicks

― oops (Oops), Friday, 22 August 2003 15:36 (twenty-three years ago)

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

u r all gay

― s1utsky (slutsky), Friday, 22 August 2003 15:38 (twenty-three years ago)

The blurb on the back: "THIS BOOK ROX0R U R ALL GAY" -- H.L. Mencken

aw, xp slutsky

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 22 August 2003 15:40 (twenty-three years ago)

I will contribute a short story. How long should a short story be?

― jel -- (jel), Friday, 22 August 2003 15:44 (twenty-three years ago)

not very long

― stevem (blueski), Friday, 22 August 2003 15:45 (twenty-three years ago)

I don't think it matters much, but usually 5000 words is average, I think. Anywhere from two to ten thousand.

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 22 August 2003 15:47 (twenty-three years ago)

http://home.villagephotos.com/2003-7/13884/erot.jpg

― Chris V. (Chris V), Friday, 22 August 2003 15:50 (twenty-three years ago)

I'm guessing the stories are supposed to be autobiographical or semi-autobiographical and laced with sardonic humor, eh? I could do that. Although I prefer my brooding stories about crazy people who are crazy in ways dissimilar to me. And we e-mail them to you, I take it, Tep? What's the deadline?

― jewelly (jewelly), Friday, 22 August 2003 15:53 (twenty-three years ago)

approx how much would a hard copy cost Tep?

― Chris V. (Chris V), Friday, 22 August 2003 15:58 (twenty-three years ago)

I'm guessing the stories are supposed to be autobiographical or semi-autobiographical and laced with sardonic humor, eh?

Why? I'd rather contribute to/read an anthology that isn't just "ILx in print."

― bnw (bnw), Friday, 22 August 2003 16:05 (twenty-three years ago)

Why? I'd rather contribute to/read an anthology that isn't just "ILx in print."

Well, maybe we should recruit other message board people then.

― jewelly (jewelly), Friday, 22 August 2003 16:08 (twenty-three years ago)

I won't be writing anything remotely autobiographical!

― jel -- (jel), Friday, 22 August 2003 16:11 (twenty-three years ago)

I'm guessing the stories are supposed to be autobiographical or semi-autobiographical and laced with sardonic humor, eh?

Oh, not at all. I mean, they could be, but shit knows mine won't be (unless the general consensus is that I am wrong, in which case I could come up with something maybe). My life isn't the least bit interesting. I write about vampires with guns and Biblical patriarchs getting it on with angels.

I figure anything goes. Whatever people are good at or want to show, go for it. Fiction, autobiography, fictional autobiography, rants, ramblings, essays, whatever.

approx how much would a hard copy cost Tep?

My roughly 200 page book -- 8" x 5" pages, which fill up very quickly -- is about $14. (I sell it for $16, but $14 is the rough minimum). Per-page cost varies slightly according to page size and binding type (spiral bound or perfect binding [what regular books use]), but the difference is very small.

For means of comparison, that 200 page book is about 55,000 words.

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 22 August 2003 16:13 (twenty-three years ago)

As far as where to send stuf ... I'm not gonna just arbitrarily take this over, so I guess wait and see who else is interested and who else might want to do it? j.lu has volunteered, but I don't know if she means spearheading it as well. It isn't important to me who "runs" this; if I'm drafted, so be it, if someone else wants to do it, more power to em.

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 22 August 2003 16:15 (twenty-three years ago)

like I said, I'll be more than happy to create chapter artwork and covers. Of course, my taste in humor is not the same as everyone elses. So I guess you'd have to volunteer me to do it.

― Chris V. (Chris V), Friday, 22 August 2003 16:16 (twenty-three years ago)

I'm all for it, Chris, I think an ILX anthology without your contributions wouldn't really be an ILX anthology.

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 22 August 2003 16:21 (twenty-three years ago)

Well, maybe we should recruit other message board people then.

I just meant we already have a message board full of sardonic anecdotes about our own lives. My preference would be the anthology shows another side of ilxor folk. (But obviously its not for me to decide. Sorry to jump on your response.)

― bnw (bnw), Friday, 22 August 2003 16:27 (twenty-three years ago)

The 'ten years old' thread showed our other sides v. well, BNW. It can always happen. :-)

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 22 August 2003 16:31 (twenty-three years ago)

i doubt i'll have anything worth contributing, but this is a really cool idea.

― Maria (Maria), Friday, 22 August 2003 16:32 (twenty-three years ago)

"The I the L the X an-th-ology!"

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Friday, 22 August 2003 16:36 (twenty-three years ago)

Everyone's byline should be "[initial or distinctive combination thereof]-dawg." I guess there could be a hell of a fight for N-dawg, but maybe we could toss -bone and -tron in there for good measure.

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 22 August 2003 16:38 (twenty-three years ago)

I might have a short story for this!

― suzy (suzy), Friday, 22 August 2003 16:38 (twenty-three years ago)

should it come with a mix cd?

― teeny (teeny), Friday, 22 August 2003 16:38 (twenty-three years ago)

Everyone's byline should be "[initial or distinctive combination thereof]-dawg."

Uh, no.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 22 August 2003 16:41 (twenty-three years ago)

A mix cd of everyone who contributes favorite song to be played when reading their ss.

― Chris V. (Chris V), Friday, 22 August 2003 16:43 (twenty-three years ago)

C'mon, N-dawg.

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 22 August 2003 16:43 (twenty-three years ago)

I'm writing as Archie Smythe

― jel -- (jel), Friday, 22 August 2003 16:45 (twenty-three years ago)

I'm confused. How in the hell did the 10 year old you thread show the non-autobiographical anecdote side of ILX, exactly?

― Ally-zay (mlescaut), Friday, 22 August 2003 16:51 (twenty-three years ago)

could the anthology include comic strips?

― stevem (blueski), Friday, 22 August 2003 16:52 (twenty-three years ago)

are my photos showing up? For some reason im getting a red x.

― Chris V. (Chris V), Friday, 22 August 2003 16:58 (twenty-three years ago)

They're showing. I just refuse to acknowledge that last one.

― Ally-zay (mlescaut), Friday, 22 August 2003 16:59 (twenty-three years ago)

The word in BNW's thread I focused on was 'sardonic.' That thread was anything but, really.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 22 August 2003 16:59 (twenty-three years ago)

I don't think "sardonic" was his only point. If you're going to contradict him, you might as well pick a thread that actually does.

― Ally-zay (mlescaut), Friday, 22 August 2003 17:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I think the "Banal Conversations" thread would make an amazing book. It's totally hypnotic.

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Friday, 22 August 2003 17:00 (twenty-three years ago)

ok. now they're showing up. why do browsers do that? eh its probably only half browser...on its mothers side.

― Chris V. (Chris V), Friday, 22 August 2003 17:01 (twenty-three years ago)

(The books epilogue:)

EPILOGUE

...and then they all lez up

― N-tron (nickalicious), Friday, 22 August 2003 17:01 (twenty-three years ago)

"I think the "Banal Conversations" thread would make an amazing book. It's totally hypnotic."

― jel -- (jel), Friday, 22 August 2003 17:01 (twenty-three years ago)

Spencer is so, so, so OTM here.

― Ally-zay (mlescaut), Friday, 22 August 2003 17:02 (twenty-three years ago)

ON 'THE ILX ANTHOLOGY'
Best book ever! --Umberto Eco
Umberto OTM. --Philip Roth

― amateurist (amateurist), Friday, 22 August 2003 17:10 (twenty-three years ago)

can we have one section completely dedicated to Hongroisms?

― Chris V. (Chris V), Friday, 22 August 2003 17:11 (twenty-three years ago)

There can be a Hongro appendix.

― NA (Nick A.), Friday, 22 August 2003 17:14 (twenty-three years ago)

"Chapter 27: If you woke up tomorrow morning with underwear on your head and Belinda Carslile was in your room giving head to Robbie Williams and you were actually on a boat being driven by Emma Bunton with no clothes on, what would you do? By Calum"

― Ally-zay (mlescaut), Friday, 22 August 2003 17:16 (twenty-three years ago)

"This book is not melodic."

― Chris V. (Chris V), Friday, 22 August 2003 17:19 (twenty-three years ago)

I think I'll write my piece about how Tracer Hand and Millar are in some kind of "who can bleed the most?" competition lately.

― Ally-zay (mlescaut), Friday, 22 August 2003 17:21 (twenty-three years ago)

I'll contribute some of my classic Ned/Dan fan erotica.

― NA (Nick A.), Friday, 22 August 2003 17:23 (twenty-three years ago)

I'd like to contribute to this, for sure. I've got some stuff lying around I haven't done much with -- some creative nonfiction. Also, maybe some poems.

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 22 August 2003 17:55 (twenty-three years ago)

"Kirkus Reviews calls it 'U & K!'"

― s1utsky (slutsky), Friday, 22 August 2003 18:11 (twenty-three years ago)

"Time Magazine: IT HONOURS THE FIRE!!!!!!!!!!"

― Ally-zay (mlescaut), Friday, 22 August 2003 18:22 (twenty-three years ago)

I'll contribute some of my classic Ned/Dan fan erotica.

What were the unclassics?

AMG Review: A promising debut compilation, ILX Anthology is an overview of various talents around the world contributing their own often differing and quite amusing takes on life, the universe and everything. (etc. etc.) -- Ned Raggett

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 22 August 2003 18:27 (twenty-three years ago)

I don't write, but I really wanna be O-dawg!

― oops (Oops), Saturday, 23 August 2003 01:34 (twenty-three years ago)

As well you by golly should.

― Tep (ktepi), Saturday, 23 August 2003 01:40 (twenty-three years ago)

I mean, doesn't Ice-Cube reference me in every other song?

― oops (Oops), Saturday, 23 August 2003 01:41 (twenty-three years ago)

afraid I already promised all the Chris stories to another zine, sorry. (for real, I did!)

― corny indie fuxxnuts (M Matos), Saturday, 23 August 2003 03:07 (twenty-three years ago)

the new york times reviews "the ilx anthology":

"sub-custos at best." - michiko kakutani

― Justyn Dillingham (Justyn Dillingham), Saturday, 23 August 2003 06:12 (twenty-three years ago)

Frankly, if I can contribute to this mutation, anybody can. Even Kenan.

― Millar (Millar), Saturday, 23 August 2003 06:13 (twenty-three years ago)

Deadline?

― Texas Sam (thatgirl), Saturday, 23 August 2003 07:19 (twenty-three years ago)

There probably should be a deadline or it'll never get done. It should probably be about a month before what we actually want the deadline to be, for the same reason you pull out right before you think you're going to -- actually, for totally different reasons.

I don't know what's reasonable. Suggestions?

― Tep (ktepi), Saturday, 23 August 2003 14:55 (twenty-three years ago)

From experience...I would say at least early January 2004. But, you know, the best way to do is to keep extending the deadline til there is enough stuff for the book.

― jel -- (jel), Saturday, 23 August 2003 15:11 (twenty-three years ago)

Seriously, is there an overarching theme? or would that be counter to the ilx-ness of it all?

― teeny (teeny), Saturday, 23 August 2003 15:14 (twenty-three years ago)

lady, if you have to ask. . .

― Texas Sam (thatgirl), Saturday, 23 August 2003 15:15 (twenty-three years ago)

I think themelessness is the way to go: I'm curious what similarities, if any, there will be when there's no attempt to make them. (To some extent that's gonna be affected by people going "Well, this would fit in an ILX anthology" or "ILX0rs would wanna read this," but even so.)

― Tep (ktepi), Saturday, 23 August 2003 15:19 (twenty-three years ago)

good point!

― teeny (teeny), Saturday, 23 August 2003 15:21 (twenty-three years ago)

And at the book presentation there'll be, conspicuous by its presence, a loooong stall selling the ilxor t-shirts, right? ...Right??

― t\'\'t (t\'\'t), Saturday, 23 August 2003 23:44 (twenty-three years ago)

Yeah! And ILXOR JUICE...the soft drink that refreshes the parts other soft drinks ignore!

― jel -- (jel), Sunday, 24 August 2003 08:00 (twenty-three years ago)

The bootyflakes?

― Tep (ktepi), Sunday, 24 August 2003 13:51 (twenty-three years ago)

Reviving just to keep it live.

j.lu, should people email stuff to you, or to me, or ... ? If anyone needs to send anything to me, tep@tep.tep obviously isn't real: bill at idea-inc.com

― Tep (ktepi), Wednesday, 27 August 2003 19:18 (twenty-three years ago)

I'm a whiz-bang at proofreading.

― Leee (Leee), Wednesday, 27 August 2003 19:48 (twenty-three years ago)

Also, my contribution would be a list of all the comics Greg Rucka has written.

― Leee (Leee), Wednesday, 27 August 2003 19:49 (twenty-three years ago)

You must be logged in to post. Please either login here, or if you are not registered, you may register here.