Yet another stupid Dave Q office thread

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This manager who started about a month ago just put a huge map of Britain next to his desk and stuck these huge bright-coloured pins into everywhere there's a regional branch. The funny bit - there's only TWO regional branches! (Manchester & Peterborough) The guy looks solemnly at this map all day (stroking chin), like he's Colin Powell, or Dr Strangelove or something, (The map went up on Friday last week!), and there's only TWO goddam pins on the map! Does anyone else find this as pathetic and hilarious as I do?

― dave q, Wednesday, 26 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Plus this guy likes to use the word 'reactive'! As in, "I'm going to ask for your input on our latest plans - but don't be reactive." ACTUAL QUOTE! This fucker really cracks me up.

― dave q, Wednesday, 26 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

String a rubber band between the pins when he is not looking. I'm sure it will make him think of synergy.

― Pete, Wednesday, 26 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Sure adding more pins after he's gone home is the answer in far flung out of the way places, then you can send him on missions to discover what happend to these ancient mysterious branch offices

― Ed, Wednesday, 26 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Dave is right. It's new-manager-with-nothing-to-do-so-he'd-better-try- and-look-busy-syndrome. It's very, very annoying. The map is HUGE btw...and is of no possible use in the office. *sighs*

― rezna, Wednesday, 26 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Rezna - you work with Dave Q?

― Nick, Wednesday, 26 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Uh...yeah...

― rezna, Wednesday, 26 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I dare you to turn it upside-down when he's next away from the office. Go on.

― chris, Wednesday, 26 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Chris, I happen to know from a previous thread that you also work in the same building. It's near MI5 headquarters as well, so bring in some marshmallows and sticks, they might come in handy.

― dave q, Wednesday, 26 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Yeah I work with Dave. Right now he's listening to his Tracy Chapman ''Greatest Hits'' CD...bless him.

― rezna, Wednesday, 26 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Maybe he's also planning on keeping a map detailing his sexual exploits. One that follows a Poisson distribution.

― Josh, Wednesday, 26 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

what distribution would you expect it to demonstrate, josh? [insert hilarious joke abt missing pages and entropy here]

― mark s, Wednesday, 26 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

On the front lawn of my office building we've replaced the Union Jack with the state of New Jersey flag 'cos we closed our London branch.

― Lesley Higgins, Wednesday, 26 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Swap the pins around. That wil, fuX0r him up totally.

― DG, Wednesday, 26 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

take two circles of paper from the hole punch and draw a scary face and a happy face, place them directly under the pin body, maybe switch them around once in a while.

― jameslucas, Wednesday, 26 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Josh -- a gravity's rainbow allusion? Hmmm.

― Alan Trewartha, Thursday, 27 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

three years pass...

In retrospect, this is where Gervais was lurking and got the idea for The Office.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Sunday, 21 November 2004 14:34 (twenty-one years ago)

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