Stairlifts: Why aren't they as fast as I remember them being when I was a kid

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Seriously, a visit to a frail aunt or more distant relative when I was younger often meant stairlift rollercoaster time. This one old lady, I can't remember what her relation was to me, I don't even know if she was, she had this one that'd whizz you up to the top and a frantic speed, it'd vibrate rapidly whilst moving, and stop with quite a jolt suddnely when it reached the end, it was great, hours of fun. But recently i tried a stairlift, it took about a minute get to the top, it crawled round the bend, and no payoff at the end, it stopped smoothly. So whats wrong with the elderly today, where's their sense of adventure gone?

― Bob Shaw (Bob Shaw), Thursday, 11 September 2003 20:51 (twenty-two years ago)

what are "stairlifts" in American? I've never even heard the word before. I'm thinking escalators, but probably I'm totally wrong. I've never been on an escalator that went around a bend, I don't think.

― chuck, Thursday, 11 September 2003 21:01 (twenty-two years ago)

Plus, old ladies don't have their own escalators, and escalators don't have chairs on them (at least in America they don't, anyway).

― chuck, Thursday, 11 September 2003 21:03 (twenty-two years ago)

Stairlifts are those things that the elderly and infirm use to get up and down stairs - a motorised chair on a rail attached to the side of the stairs. I thought they were called stairlifts in America too, so your bafflement is something of a surprise.

The first post reminds me of that bit in Gremlins where the old lady gets killed by her stairlift malfunctioning after the gremlins have been at it.

― Chriddof (Chriddof), Thursday, 11 September 2003 21:22 (twenty-two years ago)

Thats the sort of thing i mean.
http://www.sabre-stairlifts.co.uk/stairlift3.jpg

― Bob Shaw (Bob Shaw), Thursday, 11 September 2003 21:23 (twenty-two years ago)

i thought escalator too. . .

i don't know what those things are called here. I've never ridden one or seen one in person even!

― Texas, Biyatch! (thatgirl), Thursday, 11 September 2003 21:27 (twenty-two years ago)

I've only seen those on TV, round here. Don't know anyone that has ever used them (all the elderly in my life can run or hobble)

― Nichole Graham (Nichole Graham), Thursday, 11 September 2003 21:29 (twenty-two years ago)

This is the best thread I've ever read on ilx.

― Saskia, Thursday, 11 September 2003 21:49 (twenty-two years ago)

You're taller now, which means relative to your size, it is slower, cause if you measure speed in Bobs Per Minute --

...

I just broke my head.

― Tep (ktepi), Thursday, 11 September 2003 21:56 (twenty-two years ago)

That ol' biddy's been sitting there for 20 minutes and she's only half way up the first stair.

(Also, I wonder does the lack of speed have anything to do with her having a face like a cabbage patch doll?)

― Saskia, Thursday, 11 September 2003 21:59 (twenty-two years ago)

Saskia is another of my split personalities, apparently.....

― Nichole Graham (Nichole Graham), Thursday, 11 September 2003 22:02 (twenty-two years ago)

charles laughton has one in witness for the prosecution, the scenes with it are tremendously funny

― trife (simon_tr), Thursday, 11 September 2003 22:03 (twenty-two years ago)

I just hope her piss bag holds till she gets to the top.

― Saskia, Thursday, 11 September 2003 22:04 (twenty-two years ago)

I think its just old people are slower in general these days. When i was like 10, so this is only 9 or 10 yrs ago, old people used to drive their own cars like they were nigel mansell on speed, often without glasses. nowadays its all dial a ride and stuff like that.

― Bob Shaw (Bob Shaw), Thursday, 11 September 2003 22:06 (twenty-two years ago)

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