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fuck job interviews

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just coz i can't open a jdbc connection off the top of my head doesn't mean i can't sling java with the best of them.

procedural know how/objects get low down/spittin recursion like slow rounds/bringing knowledge to mo towns/i don't clown/inheritance like anna nicole's/flow threads and roll bones/throwing boulders while you chucking stones/code soldiers go it alone/rose is rational references unfashionable/sterling 2003 fuckers.

― Sterling Clover (s_clover), Thursday, 2 October 2003 17:11 (twenty-two years ago)

Go Sterling!

I feel you!

― adaml (adaml), Thursday, 2 October 2003 17:17 (twenty-two years ago)

no shit technical interviews blow. when I interviewed at my last job they had three people interview me in a row, they didn't collate their questions so I kept getting asked dhtml crap over and over again, and after having been out of work for three months, the answers were not coming to mind. Having them not come to mind three times in a row was humiliating. I still got the job for some reason.

― anthony kyle monday (akmonday), Thursday, 2 October 2003 17:17 (twenty-two years ago)

interviews/i done a few/blew em through/confused em too/left suckers like/what'd he do?

not curious/just furious/degree and skills/but positions filled/my cold fusion shold clock a mil/but its a cold world on the real/hr don't care how i feel/reduce a man/make him beg borrow and steal/make a dude wanna scream/gimme the loot gimme the loot/gimme the cream.

― Sterling Clover (s_clover), Thursday, 2 October 2003 17:20 (twenty-two years ago)

they didn't like you calling them hataz while you shook hands maybe

― jones (actual), Thursday, 2 October 2003 17:21 (twenty-two years ago)

that's awesome, Sterling.

― Mr. Diamond (diamond), Thursday, 2 October 2003 17:50 (twenty-two years ago)

yeah, i hate tech interviews. "dude, i have two fucking degrees in engineering. it's _pretty likely_ that i'll be able to re-learn C if you need me to, and your test that has me fucking up C & MATLAB code is obvious proof that i don't know anything in life and could never be worth anything."

― Kingfish (Kingfish), Thursday, 2 October 2003 17:54 (twenty-two years ago)

like camron i lay the pipes/not like richard/but yeah i just might/just some cash to stash/afford a ford/a place to say the night/unix we do this/hustle ta get through this/sure i can't beg you miss/just 30k ain't foolish/keep source realer than the source/dreams of cruisin in a porsche/opening to optimize sql/got more candidates than the california recall/product targeting/enterprise marketing/markets rise and still we fall/out on tha streets/lookin to eat/and still we ball.

― Sterling Clover (s_clover), Thursday, 2 October 2003 18:17 (twenty-two years ago)

this is starting to remind me of Michael Bolton, the programmer in Office Space - "damn it feels good to be a gangster..."

― hstencil, Thursday, 2 October 2003 18:19 (twenty-two years ago)

my portfolio is holey yo

― stevem (blueski), Thursday, 2 October 2003 18:26 (twenty-two years ago)

Someone please mail this thread to Sterling's potential employers.

― adaml (adaml), Thursday, 2 October 2003 18:36 (twenty-two years ago)

I can't sling java with the best, or worst, of them, whoever they are, and whatever it is.

― the pinefox, Thursday, 2 October 2003 18:38 (twenty-two years ago)

But can you rhyme like Luda?

― adaml (adaml), Thursday, 2 October 2003 18:47 (twenty-two years ago)

i can pimp mad graf if cajoled just so

― stevem (blueski), Thursday, 2 October 2003 19:56 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm sure there are many badly handled and interpreted technical interviews, but I think they are extremely valuable. I think the quality of developers and DBAs in my workplace would be a hell of a lot lower if the recruitment mechanism included only interviews of the talking-to-managers type. I've helped write and conduct technical interviews, and I think they can do a lot to identify who understands the subject - not how well they know the language/system in question so much as whether they can come up with a sound algorithm, for instance.

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Thursday, 2 October 2003 20:08 (twenty-two years ago)

oh I agree and when i'm in the position to hire someone I'll make them sweat through a technical interview as well. I just didn't know i was going to be tested when it happened to me and hadn't prepared, and then the repetition of it got me down.

― anthony kyle monday (akmonday), Thursday, 2 October 2003 22:36 (twenty-two years ago)

Yes I agree fuck job interviews; they are the scourge of the planet.

― calstars (calstars), Friday, 3 October 2003 00:21 (twenty-two years ago)

Fuck jobs, too.

― Chris P (Chris P), Friday, 3 October 2003 01:44 (twenty-two years ago)

sterling could do a meltzer (as in writing lyrics/rhymes for some def jux type rap act) ;)

― Julio Desouza (jdesouza), Friday, 3 October 2003 09:55 (twenty-two years ago)

No, it should be FUCK JOBS & stupid ppl who think they know more about your job than you actually do having done the job for 5 years. I mean, correct me if I'm wrong, but you are a receptionist right?

― Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Friday, 3 October 2003 09:59 (twenty-two years ago)

one year passes...

So...they are interviewing replacements for ME...and they thought they had found the perfect candidate - bright, resourceful, dynamic, everything you could want. It was only after she left that they realized she had 420 in her email address and they began to have reservations. My boss had to have this explained to him and his reply was "well, she's just expressing her interests, isn't she? It's like if I had H0wardWINE as my email address"!

― My Dinner With Little Lord Travolta (nordicskilla), Thursday, 7 October 2004 18:45 (twenty-one years ago)

Maybe she's 420 years old? Or was born in 420 A.D.?

― n/a (Nick A.), Thursday, 7 October 2004 18:51 (twenty-one years ago)

Is she a big fan of Hitler?

― why do old people and old users of ILX such bastardos (deangulberry), Thursday, 7 October 2004 18:52 (twenty-one years ago)

what kind of an idiot puts that email address on a work application? she must be ignorant of the whole cultural significance. or just an idiot.

is she hot? the good person who replaced me at my old job was smokin'. she also starting dating this douche co-worker of mine. why do I let good things happen to bad people? hMMM??

― still bevens (bscrubbins), Thursday, 7 October 2004 19:34 (twenty-one years ago)

This one woman who showed up to interview for my last job (I was helping with the interviewing) was wearing the shortest, tightest black miniskirt I'd ever seen in my life. My boss and his buyer's agent chuckled alot and made lots of dirty jokes when she was gone to the restroom, but didn't hire her. I actually respected them for not hiring her, even though they were big pervs.

― Sarah McLusky (coco), Thursday, 7 October 2004 19:36 (twenty-one years ago)

I can't go along with approving of not hiring a woman because of how she is dressed - it seems no better than hiring her for the same reason.

Pardon my ignorance, but I have no idea what this 420 thing is.

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Thursday, 7 October 2004 20:00 (twenty-one years ago)

If a guy showed up to a job interview in an office with a see-through T-shirt, would it be ok not to hire him? I think how you dress is part of the whole interview THING. I mean, I wouldn't care if she went clubbin' in those clothes, but she's most likely saying, "Hire me because I have a nice ass," right?

― Sarah McLusky (coco), Thursday, 7 October 2004 20:04 (twenty-one years ago)

at my last job i hired a fair amount of people -- maybe 10 -- to serve under me. it was always pure hilarity doing the job interviews and seeing how EVERY SINGLE WOMAN pretty much came in almost naked and flirted with me and my co-interviewee continuously. of course we hired all of those people as sexetaries.

― Yanc3y (ystrickler), Thursday, 7 October 2004 20:06 (twenty-one years ago)

420 is marijuana-code in the US. Dumb college kids smoke up at 4:20 PM, and April 20th is like a pot convention. I think it originates from police code or something.

― n/a (Nick A.), Thursday, 7 October 2004 20:07 (twenty-one years ago)

"or something." trying to act all sly and shit.

― Yanc3y (ystrickler), Thursday, 7 October 2004 20:09 (twenty-one years ago)

It's both more and less than people make it out to be. '420' began its sub-rosa linguistic career in 1971 as a bit of slang casually used by a group of high school kids at San Rafael High School in California. '420' (always pronounced "four-twenty," never "four hundred and twenty") came Is it 4:20 already? to be an accepted part of the argot within that group of about a dozen pot smokers, beginning as a reminder of the time they planned to meet to light up, 4:20 p.m. Keep in mind this wasn't a general call to all dope smokers everywhere to toke up at twenty past four every day; it was twelve kids who'd made a date to meet near a certain statue. It's thus incorrect to deem that '420' originated as a national or international dope-smoking time, even though the term began as a reference to a particular time of day.
It is not a call code, or a penal code entry:
Section 420 of the California penal code refers to obstructing entry on public land. The penal codes of other states list different entries for 420, but none of them matches anything having to do with marijuana.

It's not the police radio code for anything ...

http://www.snopes.com/language/stories/420.htm

― Remy (x Jeremy), Thursday, 7 October 2004 20:11 (twenty-one years ago)

"Most, however, insist that 420 is not police radio code for anything, anywhere."

http://www.phish.net/faq/420copcode.html

― Gold Teeth II (kenan), Thursday, 7 October 2004 20:11 (twenty-one years ago)

Haha! Pedantic Stoners Unite!

― Remy (x Jeremy), Thursday, 7 October 2004 20:12 (twenty-one years ago)

Pedantic stoners of the world
Unite and correct each other
Pedantic stoners of the world
Hand it over, hand it over, hand it over...

― Morrissey (Dan Perry), Thursday, 7 October 2004 20:16 (twenty-one years ago)

Sorry for my misinformation, dudes, I DON'T BREAK THE LAW.

― n/a (Nick A.), Thursday, 7 October 2004 20:17 (twenty-one years ago)

Wait, is sodomy illegal in Illinois?

― n/a (Nick A.), Thursday, 7 October 2004 20:19 (twenty-one years ago)

The age of consent is still 16, right?

― n/a (Nick A.), Thursday, 7 October 2004 20:19 (twenty-one years ago)

is she hot? the good person who replaced me at my old job was smokin'.

hahaha apparently adam's coworkers who interviewed her did nothing but talk about how "pretty" she was the rest of the day! how did you know?

― kyle (akmonday), Thursday, 7 October 2004 20:20 (twenty-one years ago)

I've never interviewed for a fuck job.

― Michael White (Hereward), Thursday, 7 October 2004 20:21 (twenty-one years ago)

You just rely on nepotism?

― n/a (Nick A.), Thursday, 7 October 2004 20:22 (twenty-one years ago)

Hmmm. I do have some cute cousins. But I don't think they'd pay me.

― Michael White (Hereward), Thursday, 7 October 2004 20:23 (twenty-one years ago)

the above mentioned attractive replacement got hired at this company that we were representing against microsoft. they 'liked' her so much they hired her on permanently despite the fact that they had laid off about 90% of their workforce the year before. so this kinda behavior works for some people..

― still bevens (bscrubbins), Thursday, 7 October 2004 20:24 (twenty-one years ago)

she's most likely saying, "Hire me because I have a nice ass," right?

I don't see the problem here. It cuts both ways - I would NEVER work for an employer who did not have an outstanding ass. That's basically why I am leaving my current job.

― Howard Wine (nordicskilla), Thursday, 7 October 2004 21:10 (twenty-one years ago)

Well, since you're gonna end up kissin' it alot, it might as well be outfuckingstanding, no?

― Michael White (Hereward), Thursday, 7 October 2004 21:23 (twenty-one years ago)

You know my mind.

My new boss has an incredible ass. It would be just as suitable for a hip hop video as it would be for bouncing business cards off of.

― Howard Wine (nordicskilla), Thursday, 7 October 2004 21:28 (twenty-one years ago)

If you can figure out how to bounce cards off of her ass and into the cleavage of interested parties, you could create a relaxed, fun work environment.

― Michael White (Hereward), Thursday, 7 October 2004 21:36 (twenty-one years ago)

It is already relaxed and fun. They are so FUN and WACKY that they have a lifesize cutout of Dr Evil in rhe office.

― Howard Wine (nordicskilla), Thursday, 7 October 2004 21:41 (twenty-one years ago)

What are you doing now, Adam??

I'm about to send my resume off tomorrow to a potential new workplace!

― jaymc (jaymc), Thursday, 7 October 2004 21:53 (twenty-one years ago)

I am working at a big famous educational institution about a mile from where I live. Guess which one.

― Howard Wine (nordicskilla), Thursday, 7 October 2004 22:10 (twenty-one years ago)

good luck!

― Howard Wine (nordicskilla), Thursday, 7 October 2004 22:12 (twenty-one years ago)

With your resume, I mean.

― Howard Wine (nordicskilla), Thursday, 7 October 2004 22:14 (twenty-one years ago)

Thanks, and nice work landing the job!

― jaymc (jaymc), Thursday, 7 October 2004 22:19 (twenty-one years ago)

Yes. Yes, it was nice work.

― Howard Wine (nordicskilla), Thursday, 7 October 2004 22:20 (twenty-one years ago)

Adam, is it Luna's Gypsy Belly Dancing School?

http://www.lunabelly.com/instruction.html

― Michael White (Hereward), Thursday, 7 October 2004 22:28 (twenty-one years ago)

Yes, I am Executive Assistant to the Chief Financial Officer there.

― Howard Wine (nordicskilla), Thursday, 7 October 2004 22:30 (twenty-one years ago)

Well done, young man. We're very proud of you. Remember not to wear any red shirts, k?

― Michael White (Hereward), Thursday, 7 October 2004 22:31 (twenty-one years ago)

Maybe she's 420 years old? Or was born in 420 A.D.?

Or is the 420th person with her user name that has an account at her ISP or email provider?

― Christine 'Green Leafy Dragon' Indigo (cindigo), Thursday, 7 October 2004 22:38 (twenty-one years ago)

She should still know better.

― Howard Wine (nordicskilla), Thursday, 7 October 2004 22:41 (twenty-one years ago)

oh c'mon, it's California.

― hstencil (hstencil), Thursday, 7 October 2004 22:45 (twenty-one years ago)

Adam, that's a little Catch-22 of you, isn't it? She should know about something relatively arcane which, if she did know it, would suggest a closer relationship to a behavior that would cross her off the list for employment.

― Michael White (Hereward), Thursday, 7 October 2004 22:45 (twenty-one years ago)

Yeah, we've been fucked up since this morning's profile meeting. Then we all went outside and my boss did a radical 360 off of of the office half pipe. We were all stoked!

xpost okay you win

― Howard Wine (nordicskilla), Thursday, 7 October 2004 22:47 (twenty-one years ago)

I still haven't called the guy back that I interviewed with Tuesday a week ago. He said he'd make his calls Friday or Monday, and now it's Friday. I really should call him, right? But I'm SO SCARED! I hate doing that. It's somehow worse than interviewing itself.

― Sarah McLusky (coco), Friday, 8 October 2004 15:50 (twenty-one years ago)

yeah you should call him. Don't be scared, even though I know it's scary. The worst he can say is you didn't get it, and you've probably (hopefully) already prepared for that possibility.

― hstencil (hstencil), Friday, 8 October 2004 15:51 (twenty-one years ago)

Yeah, I have. Ok, here goes...

― Sarah McLusky (coco), Friday, 8 October 2004 15:52 (twenty-one years ago)

Didn't get it. I was second on the list, but the other candidate had lots of communications experience, whatever that means.

I hate it when intervewers don't call you back after an in-person interview, especially when they say they will by a particular date. I know it's no fun to reject people, but JEEZUS.

― Sarah McLusky (coco), Friday, 8 October 2004 16:08 (twenty-one years ago)

:(

― Howard Wine (nordicskilla), Friday, 8 October 2004 16:09 (twenty-one years ago)

sorry Sarah! Well at least you know, which in a sense is better (though I agree that it's aggravating).

― hstencil (hstencil), Friday, 8 October 2004 16:12 (twenty-one years ago)

Yeah, guess so...

― Sarah McLusky (coco), Friday, 8 October 2004 16:14 (twenty-one years ago)

He said he'd make his calls Friday or Monday, and now it's Friday.

I tend to like to take the initiative in these cases and call on Tuesday or Wednesday and insinuate I have other offers, so that they'll see I am self-motivated and am not begging them for work.

― Michael White (Hereward), Friday, 8 October 2004 16:22 (twenty-one years ago)

4:20 is the best time ofday

― animal, Friday, 8 October 2004 16:39 (twenty-one years ago)

i am still high from last night

― sometimes i like to pretend i am very small and warm (ex machina), Friday, 8 October 2004 16:46 (twenty-one years ago)

two weeks pass...

seriously though.

― cºzen (Cozen), Wednesday, 27 October 2004 15:04 (twenty years ago)

also fuck 'assessment days'.

― cºzen (Cozen), Wednesday, 27 October 2004 15:06 (twenty years ago)

I got a job!

― cºzen (Cozen), Tuesday, 2 November 2004 18:04 (twenty years ago)

what happened in the last hour?

― Freelance Hiveminder (blueski), Tuesday, 2 November 2004 18:08 (twenty years ago)

The percoset kicked in?

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 2 November 2004 18:40 (twenty years ago)

contratz, duder.

― Ian John50n (orion), Tuesday, 2 November 2004 18:43 (twenty years ago)

noise dudes in power!

― cºzen (Cozen), Tuesday, 2 November 2004 18:53 (twenty years ago)

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