Does Spam work?

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How many penis-extension kits must be sold for a spammer to make a profit after the (i imagine pretty cheap) cost of sending out k-zillion spam e-mails?

― Fritz Wollner (Fritz), Friday, 3 October 2003 12:44 (twenty-two years ago)

It does work. I saw a rather half-hearted investigation on the BBC that tracked the originator of a large percentage of spam emails to his fortress like mansion in Florida. Half-hearted because they told the reporter to go away and that was pretty much the end of it. The police know who he is but can't touch him, for some reason.

― N. (nickdastoor), Friday, 3 October 2003 12:56 (twenty-two years ago)

because the florida p.d. luv them penis extensions

― dyson (dyson), Friday, 3 October 2003 13:00 (twenty-two years ago)

Do the penis-extention kits work, that's the question?

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Friday, 3 October 2003 13:03 (twenty-two years ago)

i'm not sure. once millar sees the thread he'll let us know, i'm sure.

― dyson (dyson), Friday, 3 October 2003 13:18 (twenty-two years ago)

the bit of plasticine they sent me keeps falling off

― Ed (dali), Friday, 3 October 2003 13:51 (twenty-two years ago)

How does spam work?

― Fritz Wollner (Fritz), Monday, 6 October 2003 16:14 (twenty-two years ago)

One in a million people buys stuff?

― N. (nickdastoor), Monday, 6 October 2003 16:17 (twenty-two years ago)

You put the spam in the skillet. You take the spam out of the skillet and put it on a biscuit. You put the spam biscuit in yr mouf and it goes down into yr tummy. Yr tummy don't go "BWRORWRGBRMLBEROWR" any more. Thus, the spam worketh.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Monday, 6 October 2003 16:19 (twenty-two years ago)

does spam need people to maintain it or is it all automated once it is let loose? is spam the first act of aggression on humanity by The Matrix?

― Fritz Wollner (Fritz), Monday, 6 October 2003 16:21 (twenty-two years ago)

Actually it's just the one guy but he has the biggest, hardest penis you've ever seen, huge manboobs, weighs 3oz and has 5000 letters after his name.

― N. (nickdastoor), Monday, 6 October 2003 16:23 (twenty-two years ago)

Spam is the first information-based lifeform you know.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Monday, 6 October 2003 16:24 (twenty-two years ago)

is he that dude from nigeria with hundreds of thousands of dollars he needs my help getting out of the country?

― Fritz Wollner (Fritz), Monday, 6 October 2003 17:18 (twenty-two years ago)

On Penn & Teller's Showtime show, "Bullshit", they tested out a few of the penis-enlargement kits on some more than willing participants and found, not surprisingly, that none of them worked at all. I'm not sure how scientific their study actually was, but it was somewhat entertaining.

― Charlie Rose (Charlie Rose), Monday, 6 October 2003 17:55 (twenty-two years ago)

Dude, Dyson, wouldn't it be easier to just ask me if I'll fuck you instead of being a dickhead in three different threads?

And how do you all know these spam people don't have mansions for other unrelated reasons, hmm?

― Ally-zay, Tuesday, 14 October 2003 16:50 (twenty-one years ago)

Dudette, don't hold you breath for the proposition.

― Mr Noodles (Mr Noodles), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 17:00 (twenty-one years ago)

thank you mr.noodles, i will take it from here.

now about the mansions: where i work our server hosts some type of spam type activity (yes, i feel shame for being connected at all to spam production) and these people who produce it - i would be amazed if they owned furniture let alone a bloody mansion.

― dyson (dyson), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 17:25 (twenty-one years ago)

I wonder the same thing about telemarketing. Some motherfuckers MUST be buying things over the phone. I bet they're all senile.

― oops (Oops), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 21:15 (twenty-one years ago)

one month passes...

Okay, so as hip as you kids are to which types of subject headers automatically = SPAM, do you still get tricked into opening such e-mails every once in a while? And what does it take to trick you?

I opened one with a bogus "confirmation number" -- it looked like it could be fake, but I've been making reservations for my holiday plans and if there was any reason why I might need a confirmation number... you know. Now I feel dumb. When the fuck does anyone ever ask for a confirmation number anyway?

― ethereal cereal (Jody Beth Rosen), Sunday, 16 November 2003 18:51 (twenty-one years ago)

for confirmation

― cinniblount (James Blount), Sunday, 16 November 2003 19:08 (twenty-one years ago)

yeah, they get me from time to time, usually the forced reply-to field ones. Latley they've had to resort to interruptive words with periods ("sat.isfyhe.r.tonit.e") in order to evade the spam filter, which puts me off something fierce.

The best spam I ever got was subjectlined "Supply Of Knives" and it still makes me happy just thinking about it.

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Sunday, 16 November 2003 19:09 (twenty-one years ago)

Does spam work?

No it doesn't. It just lays in the can waiting to be eaten.

― ed dill (eddill), Sunday, 16 November 2003 22:50 (twenty-one years ago)

twenty years pass...

Welcome to Scam World

https://www.nytimes.com/2024/04/21/style/scams-identity-theft.html
https://archive.ph/9O5Ed

― z_tbd, Sunday, 21 April 2024 17:13 (one year ago)

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