How can you tell you're in ILX

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1. YOU ARE A WEREWOLF!!!!

Leee (Leee), Monday, 13 October 2003 21:06 (twenty-one years ago)

... and yet you're only difficulty in navigating a keyboard is leaving the caps lock on.

Leee (Leee), Monday, 13 October 2003 21:09 (twenty-one years ago)

2. Momus keeps antagonizing you with completely ridiculous, logic-flouting posts. Unless of course, you are Momus, in which case you antagonize everyone else with your completely ridiculous, logic-flouting posts.

hstencil, Monday, 13 October 2003 21:11 (twenty-one years ago)

3. The ILX has you, Leeeo.

Girolamo Savonarola, Monday, 13 October 2003 21:15 (twenty-one years ago)

4. You lose the will to live.

Nicolars (Nicole), Monday, 13 October 2003 21:15 (twenty-one years ago)

Girolamo, you sweettalker you.

5. And they all lez up.

Leee (Leee), Monday, 13 October 2003 21:26 (twenty-one years ago)

6. you say "SHOCKAH!" frequently in real-life conversation

mookieproof (mookieproof), Monday, 13 October 2003 21:29 (twenty-one years ago)

SHOCKAH

Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 13 October 2003 21:30 (twenty-one years ago)

ZOOLOO

Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 13 October 2003 21:30 (twenty-one years ago)

(sorry)

Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 13 October 2003 21:30 (twenty-one years ago)

http://thecosbyshow75.altervista.org/italiano/immagini/008.jpg

Nicolars (Nicole), Monday, 13 October 2003 21:32 (twenty-one years ago)

7. Middle aged hippies, speccy nerds and obsessive ultra-pedants are afforded celebrity and (remote) sexual attractiveness.

Mark C (Mark C), Monday, 13 October 2003 21:32 (twenty-one years ago)

8. You endure and/or dish-out the worst puns imaginable.

Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Monday, 13 October 2003 21:33 (twenty-one years ago)

(Spence, I already said that, haha)

Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 13 October 2003 21:34 (twenty-one years ago)

9. The internet seems broken.

Aaron A., Monday, 13 October 2003 21:36 (twenty-one years ago)

(remote) sexual attractiveness.

don't forget poor lighting

the surface noise (electricsound), Monday, 13 October 2003 22:26 (twenty-one years ago)

10. You happily meet up with strange people you encountered via the Internet...in order to go get drunk.

j.lu (j.lu), Monday, 13 October 2003 22:27 (twenty-one years ago)

11.You find yourself arguing heatedly with complete strangers about stuff you know nothing about, couldn't care less about, and which is of no importance to anyone anyway.

colin s barrow (colin s barrow), Monday, 13 October 2003 23:15 (twenty-one years ago)

You do not, fucko.

Tep (ktepi), Monday, 13 October 2003 23:17 (twenty-one years ago)

12. Apparently you become The Punisher.

Ally (mlescaut), Monday, 13 October 2003 23:31 (twenty-one years ago)

13. Parody threads

oops (Oops), Monday, 13 October 2003 23:35 (twenty-one years ago)

You find yourself finding dry, deadly humour in innocent posts

Nichole Graham (Nichole Graham), Monday, 13 October 2003 23:39 (twenty-one years ago)

14 You argue about Kill Bill for in excess of 700 posts, for fuck's sake.

Matt (Matt), Monday, 13 October 2003 23:39 (twenty-one years ago)

15. Somehow, without explanation, no one is absolutely right anymore -- they're "OTM", instead. Also, somehow without explanation, nothing is necessary anymore -- rather, it's "urgent & key"/"U&K".

16. You feed off of antagonism and find that the mere thought of wandering into a community where your ideas and thoughts aren't challenged sends you into a fear-induced, spastic fit.

17. The rest of the world, with its vanilla-like lack of neuroses and complete ability to blend in anywhere, appears to be completely foreign to your sensibilities.

18. It becomes routine for you to wonder who in the hell half of the musical artists mentioned in any given music-centric thread are, all while you're listening to something by a musical artist that, prior to ILX, you wouldn't have ever heard of before.

Many Coloured Halo (Dee the Lurker), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 00:14 (twenty-one years ago)

19. You ritually get your environment confused with the set of a porn movie.

Curt1s St3ph3ns, Tuesday, 14 October 2003 00:51 (twenty-one years ago)

20. you find yourself saying "haha '[word]'" out loud to people.

M Matos (M Matos), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 00:56 (twenty-one years ago)

Matos' last statement is sad but true.

Nicolars (Nicole), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 00:58 (twenty-one years ago)

21. http://bitchcakes.topcities.com/katze/dj.jpg

Ally (mlescaut), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 00:59 (twenty-one years ago)

you have an internet crush.

The Lady Ms Lurex (lucylurex), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 01:00 (twenty-one years ago)

i have dj kitty on my desktop AND an internet crush. i wonder where i am.

the surface noise (electricsound), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 01:03 (twenty-one years ago)

you have an internet crush.

Blimey.

*focuses attention on the cute little kitty DJ*

Many Coloured Halo (Dee the Lurker), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 01:05 (twenty-one years ago)

DJ Kitty is sincerely the second most cutest thing in the world, he has such an adorable little face, it is like he is pleading with you, "Please, please take me home and save me from this crazy ass Japanese photographer who keeps putting me in these jacked up outfits"

Ally (mlescaut), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 01:05 (twenty-one years ago)

i thought he was going "the next person who asks me to play Blur is going to get a claw in the eye"

the surface noise (electricsound), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 01:06 (twenty-one years ago)

22. You exclaim aloud with joy when you finally find out what a frequently-used acronym means (see #15).

Layna Andersen (Layna Andersen), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 02:11 (twenty-one years ago)

23. i have no idea what koritfw means; even still, KORITFW.

Aaron A., Tuesday, 14 October 2003 03:22 (twenty-one years ago)

24. You not only know who Momus is, but you have plotted his death (j/k of course, I have no beef)

(yeah, what does KORITFW mean?)

oops (Oops), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 03:48 (twenty-one years ago)

Think Young.

kirsten (kirsten), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 03:48 (twenty-one years ago)

I would put Ally's DJ Kitty post on the 'laugh out loud' thread, but me 2 lazy

oops (Oops), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 03:49 (twenty-one years ago)

Also remember that SBIB means 'so bad it's bad'.

colin s barrow (colin s barrow), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 03:54 (twenty-one years ago)

25. You're seriously bewildered and just don't know what to do with your working day when the site goes down.

26. You have the feeling you belong to some crazy, creepy, world-spinning internet cultx0r.

Mike Stuchbery, Tuesday, 14 October 2003 04:31 (twenty-one years ago)

27. You say 'grebt' all the time.

Andrew (enneff), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 04:48 (twenty-one years ago)

xp: More like word-spinning.

Leee (Leee), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 04:50 (twenty-one years ago)

28. Drinking beer and sitting in front of the computer feels like socializing to you.

Kenan Hebert (kenan), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 05:48 (twenty-one years ago)

You mean it isn't?

kate (kate), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 07:27 (twenty-one years ago)

29. You find yourself attempting to recount hilarious ILX threads IRL then get embarrassed trying to explain injokes and abbreviations to people who are now looking at you very strangely....

smee (smee), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 08:29 (twenty-one years ago)

30. You meet your no so evil twin!

Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 08:35 (twenty-one years ago)

31. You insert phoney html tags into real world emails. What is this '0r' stuff btw? As in ILK0rs?

Enrique (Enrique), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 08:36 (twenty-one years ago)

32. you frequently spend 10 minutes writing lengthy ripostes to other people's inflammatory posts, then have a rethink and decide to scrap it at the last minute (or you press Submit by accident)

stevem (blueski), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 08:37 (twenty-one years ago)

32. You find yourself reading and even responding to the opinions of certain people who, if you met them outside of a faceless electronic virtual environment, say at a party or a bar, would likely trigger one or more of the following responses: a: a left hook. b: a blossoming dependency on strong anti-depressants. c: uncontrollable derisive laughter. d: a quizzical raised eyebrow, followed by a slow shuffle in the opposite direction quickly translated into a sprint for the nearest exit. e: the employment of monosyllabic answers coupled with a blank expressions in a desperate gambit to inspire your unwelcome antagonist to disengage. f: an uncontrollable urge to purchase a firearm.

Alex K (Alex K), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 08:37 (twenty-one years ago)

33. You say 'equals' instead of 'is' in normal converstion.

34. Obv you can no longer say 'obviously' either.

robster (robster), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 08:41 (twenty-one years ago)

51. You make every innocent thing that others say suggestive. Example:

50. You turn everything into sex [...] kittens [...]

Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 12:35 (twenty-one years ago)

52. You eventually turn into Jess.

Nicolars (Nicole), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 12:51 (twenty-one years ago)

Nicole OTM

53. You meet either Gareth or Ned.

Ally (mlescaut), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 12:53 (twenty-one years ago)

54. You get pissed off when someone starts a thread we've done (many times) before, but can't be arsed to find the old ones in the archive and link them, in the hope that n. will do it for you.

alext (alext), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 13:01 (twenty-one years ago)

(or me)

55. You laugh out loud at your desk at work.
56. Even if you are completely cynical, you find yourself being very twee at times.

Sarah McLUsky (coco), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 13:07 (twenty-one years ago)

57. After being Jess for a while, you turn into Trife

Ricardo (RickyT), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 13:11 (twenty-one years ago)

58. People accuse of being full of hate when you are actually full of nougat.

Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 13:13 (twenty-one years ago)

59. People accuse you of being full of nougat when you are actually full of bees. Delicioius, homicidal Bees!

Kingfish (Kingfish), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 13:24 (twenty-one years ago)

60. You actually know what KORITFW and PLUR mean. (Keep On Rocking In The Free World, btw.)

A Girl Named Sam (thatgirl), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 15:00 (twenty-one years ago)

61. You scroll to the bottom of news articles in an attempt to 'post'.

PLUR? (Enrique), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 15:02 (twenty-one years ago)

(PLUR = peace, love, unity, respect)

Ricardo (RickyT), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 15:05 (twenty-one years ago)

62. bourgeousie socialism as far as the eye can see
63. http://bitchcakes.topcities.com/images/boyz.jpg

Nicky Wire, Tuesday, 14 October 2003 16:14 (twenty-one years ago)

64. Hello! I have a new name!

autobot lover -- (jel), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 16:17 (twenty-one years ago)

(Autobot Lover sounds vaguely dirty. I like it.)

nickalicious (nickalicious), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 16:20 (twenty-one years ago)

53. You meet either Gareth or Ned.

I still can't figure out why we didn't cancel each other out when we met.

64. You kill time in Dublin waiting for the DV to appear...by posting on ILX! (Because the alternative is swimming in the Liffey and I would die, or something.)

Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 16:21 (twenty-one years ago)

65. http://www.suse.de/~mha/old-public-html/pictures/subway.gif

forceful pretension, Tuesday, 14 October 2003 16:22 (twenty-one years ago)

Is that HR from Bad Brains!?!

nickalicious (nickalicious), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 16:23 (twenty-one years ago)

66. You're having a spirited discussion on music that's not worthy of such spirited discussions with the likes of Chuck 3ddy and Fr4nk C0g4n.

nickalicious (nickalicious), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 16:24 (twenty-one years ago)

(Whatever happened to the guy that thought I would kill his family based on that pic?) (Ha, that is an ominous question.)

bnw (bnw), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 16:28 (twenty-one years ago)

67. You have the oddest urge to hang with the person you've been having epic ILX arguments with.

(Note: ain't always true, dependent on mention of knives)

I still can't figure out why we didn't cancel each other out when we met.

DNA has much to answer for. Prolly.

Nichole Graham (Nichole Graham), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 16:31 (twenty-one years ago)

68. You find yourself photoshopping Ned's head onto a scantily clad body.

Sarah McLusky (coco), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 18:23 (twenty-one years ago)

69. You find yourself photoshopping Ned's head onto a scantily clad body again.

Lara (Lara), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 18:32 (twenty-one years ago)

70. You are Ned and you keep losing your head.

Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 18:34 (twenty-one years ago)

71. You find yourself doing a Dada with Ned's head and causing comp crawl.

Nichole Graham (Nichole Graham), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 18:35 (twenty-one years ago)

72. The ironing is delicious!

Leee (Leee), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 23:32 (twenty-one years ago)

73. You've become acquainted with 12 ft lizards and strawmen.
74. You've become accustomed to somebody blaming hstencil, like, regularly.

t\'\'t (t\'\'t), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 23:50 (twenty-one years ago)

75. when someone IRL insults you, you suspect them of being Marcello hiding under a pseudonym

M Matos (M Matos), Tuesday, 14 October 2003 23:58 (twenty-one years ago)

76. You're growing abso-popping-lutely dead certain that whenever someone's speaking of 'too much rhythm & not enuff meolody' the speaker can only be...

t\'\'t (t\'\'t), Wednesday, 15 October 2003 00:06 (twenty-one years ago)

77. The sun never sets...

t\'\'t (t\'\'t), Wednesday, 15 October 2003 00:07 (twenty-one years ago)

78. ....on Killing Joke.

t\'\'t (t\'\'t), Wednesday, 15 October 2003 00:08 (twenty-one years ago)

79. You have 1 new testimonials. [Approve or Reject]

Oh, sorry, that's Friendster.

You are connected to 798,346 enemies in your Personal Network, through 3 friends.

Momus (Momus), Wednesday, 15 October 2003 00:13 (twenty-one years ago)

80. The haiku, everywhere! (Which is a good thing)

t\'\'t (t\'\'t), Wednesday, 15 October 2003 12:17 (twenty-one years ago)

ILX explained

Curt1s St3ph3ns, Wednesday, 15 October 2003 23:13 (twenty-one years ago)

81. You set yourself up a remote web account just so you've got somewhere to store pics and post them to various threads.

Trayce (trayce), Thursday, 16 October 2003 00:03 (twenty-one years ago)

82. OMG! WTF? LOL!?!?!?!?!?!?!

Sarah MCLUsky (coco), Thursday, 16 October 2003 18:04 (twenty-one years ago)

83. When you attack people, your accompanying sound effect is a hearty 'WANK.'

Leee (Leee), Friday, 24 October 2003 22:25 (twenty-one years ago)

84. You feel increasingly guilty for letting fall fashion pass you by.

Tep (ktepi), Friday, 24 October 2003 22:28 (twenty-one years ago)

85. You're a total dog person, yet strangely get hugely excited over fluffy pictures of cute little kitties.

86. You start anticipating random movies for no reason whatsoever, or you really want to see extremely quirky movies so you can chat about them at length.

87. You dream in pictures, but the sound is muted. (Oh wait, I'm sorry. That was for the "How you can tell you're in Medazzaland" list.)

88. You still find yourself consuming massive amounts of calories, no change from before, but now in more creative and/or worldly ways.

Many Coloured Halo (Dee the Lurker), Saturday, 25 October 2003 00:23 (twenty-one years ago)

89. you hear a ridiculously catchy eighties german new wave song that you haven't heard in years, and of course you change yer nom-de-ILX to said song.

Eisbär (llamasfur), Saturday, 25 October 2003 00:35 (twenty-one years ago)

http://images.amazon.com/images/P/B0000085WU.01._PE_SCMZZZZZZZ_.jpg

Eisbär (llamasfur), Saturday, 25 October 2003 00:37 (twenty-one years ago)

you plug your blog

Haikunym (Haikunym), Saturday, 25 October 2003 00:45 (twenty-one years ago)

90. actually, you
start a blog just to keep up
with all the others

Haikunym (Haikunym), Saturday, 25 October 2003 00:48 (twenty-one years ago)

91. You, a massive eighties New Wave fanatic, go absolutely nutso over finding out that there's a "ridiculously catchy eighties german new wave song" you've never heard of before, and automatically must hear this song.

;)

(I can totally relate to no. 90, btw. *smiles broadly*)

Many Coloured Halo (Dee the Lurker), Saturday, 25 October 2003 00:55 (twenty-one years ago)

you plug your blog

You wouldn't catch me doing something like that

Matt (Matt), Saturday, 25 October 2003 11:41 (twenty-one years ago)

92. In ILX, no one can hear me scream. Or at least, they act like they don't hear me screaming.


you plug your blog uh...doesn't this belong on the eumphemisms thread?

Skottie, Sunday, 26 October 2003 07:50 (twenty-one years ago)

93. you have an internet relationship

dontask, Sunday, 26 October 2003 07:53 (twenty-one years ago)

94. A winner is you.

Kingfish (Kingfish), Sunday, 26 October 2003 08:33 (twenty-one years ago)

95. You have a tumultuous and ambiguous relationship with the Hitler/fun dichotomy.

Mark C (Mark C), Sunday, 26 October 2003 15:55 (twenty-one years ago)

three months pass...
More like a related sign but:

96. You walk past a book called Asphalt Nation and misread it as Asshat Nation.

Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 20 February 2004 22:48 (twenty-one years ago)

you believe in a thing called LOOOOOOOOVE (runs shrieking)

Donna Brown (Donna Brown), Friday, 20 February 2004 23:58 (twenty-one years ago)


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