STOP THIS MOVIE NOW -- Triple H in New Conan Movie?

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There's a story here at an Arnold fansite about the next Conan flick in development hell right now, "King Conan: Crown of Iron":
...Although Arnold needed to walk away from the project, Milius understands Arnold's decision and knows he will make a great Governor. One hour after Arnold announced his decision to run on the Jay Leno Show, Arnold phoned Milius and said he was sorry that King Conan would not happen. Once again, Milius was invited over to the Schwarzenegger's for dinner. Despite the project collapsing, the two remain good friends.

So now Milius needs to find a replacement. I asked about Ralf Moeller, TV's Conan. Apparently they like the guy for his size but instead think the wrestler “Triple H” MIGHT be a better and grittier fit. They also like his acting and believe he is the perfect age to show the transition from a younger Conan (flashbacks) and could also play the gray-bearded Conan.

Milius and Triple H are getting along great already. The two are working on a new kick-ass action movie called "Journey of the Deadman".

...Milius is anxious to get the project going again and to continue the Conan mythology of kings, wizards and women of the finest stalk. He wants to film in Turkey and Ron Cobb and Basil Poledouris are anxious also to return....

for those who keep track of such things, the flick already has its own IMDB entry.

oh yeah, and for those who don't know, Triple H is a top WWF/WWE guy named Jean Paul Levesque who has had a bit of (alleged) steroid problem. One wonders if he's gunna tear another quad during the filming.

Kingfish (Kingfish), Friday, 17 October 2003 14:35 (twenty-two years ago)

wow!

Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Friday, 17 October 2003 14:37 (twenty-two years ago)

Bring it!

Enrique (Enrique), Friday, 17 October 2003 14:38 (twenty-two years ago)

http://www.pmpnetwork.com/tripleh/hhh134.jpg

One of the rumoured side-effects of steroid use is a weakening of the connective tissue. For example, the kind that holds muscles(like, say, quadraceps) to the skeletal structure...

Kingfish (Kingfish), Friday, 17 October 2003 14:39 (twenty-two years ago)

steroids in wrestling, oh my gawd shockah!

Mr Noodles (Mr Noodles), Friday, 17 October 2003 14:41 (twenty-two years ago)

All these wrestlers-becoming-actors make me miss Andre the Giant SOOOOO FUCKING MUCH.

nickalicious (nickalicious), Friday, 17 October 2003 14:42 (twenty-two years ago)

hey he was in a few movies. "No more rhymes now I mean it!" Andre: "Anybody want a peanut."

Chris V. (Chris V), Friday, 17 October 2003 14:45 (twenty-two years ago)

who will play Andy Richter?

Horace Mann (Horace Mann), Friday, 17 October 2003 14:48 (twenty-two years ago)

Ned Beatty, of course.

Kingfish (Kingfish), Friday, 17 October 2003 14:54 (twenty-two years ago)

Kinda takes the sheen off Edge's role in Highlander 13 (or whatever, huh?

Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Friday, 17 October 2003 14:57 (twenty-two years ago)

Then I nominate Richard Belzer for Conan.

Horace Mann (Horace Mann), Friday, 17 October 2003 14:58 (twenty-two years ago)

I thought this thread was going to be about Hubert H. Humphrey.

jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 17 October 2003 15:09 (twenty-two years ago)

TS: Which will suck worse, this new Conan Movie or the hypothetical John Constantine flick.
I'm betting "Constantine" will suck more...mostly because Keanu cannot possibly be a better actor than Triple H.
I suspect this Conan flick will be like "The Scorpion King"
In other words, sure, it'll suck...but only like an virginal cheerleader instead of a prisonbound crack whore.

Lord Custos Omicron (Lord Custos Omicron), Friday, 17 October 2003 15:14 (twenty-two years ago)

Yeah, but maybe it'll suck like a recently paroled crackwhore.

Horace Mann (Horace Mann), Friday, 17 October 2003 15:25 (twenty-two years ago)

or a crack-thirsty crackwhore, one who's just SO thirsty for crack

Kingfish (Kingfish), Friday, 17 October 2003 15:33 (twenty-two years ago)

Conan should be played by
http://www.justlaugh.net/links/people/macdonald.jpg

Horace Mann (Horace Mann), Friday, 17 October 2003 15:36 (twenty-two years ago)

Horace and Kingfish...the Batman and (Jason Todd) Robin of ILX.
I'll leave it to reader to make up their own mind which one is which.

Lord Custos Omicron (Lord Custos Omicron), Friday, 17 October 2003 15:41 (twenty-two years ago)

HHH acting is argurably the worst idea ever. I really don't think anything needs be said past that.

-nepotism sucks-
Alan

Alan Conceicao, Friday, 17 October 2003 15:42 (twenty-two years ago)

yes ha ha fellas.

this actually makes me kind of sad!

the closing image of conan, beardy arnold sitting on a throne looking bored, "destined to wear the crown of aquilonia upon a troubled browww" (dorky i know to say so, but HOW PRESCIENT IS THAT??) is a window into a kind of movie that could never exist: a fantasy actioner about being old, tired, bored, and overworked (nb i've never read any of the books abt conan's late life -- were they even being written by howard at that point? -- and i doubt they were lion-in-wintery at all anyway).

g--ff c-nn-n (gcannon), Friday, 17 October 2003 15:54 (twenty-two years ago)

Horace and Kingfish...the Batman and (Jason Todd) Robin of ILX.
I'll leave it to reader to make up their own mind which one is which.

http://freespace.virgin.net/noel.w/Gifs/Batman3.gif

"Should Horace Or Kingfish die? Should Batman reach them in time? Should anybody give a flying fuck?

Call

  • 1-800-987-DCDC -- if you think they should die
  • 1-800-987-CDCD -- if they should star in the Broadway version of "Flash Gordon: The Musical"
  • 1-800-987-DCCD -- if you want to hear your last five transactions
  • 1-800-987-CDDC -- if you're trying to reach the Center for Design Control

    Only $1.95 per call! For Children under 18, hide from your parents when you call.

    Kingfish (Kingfish), Friday, 17 October 2003 15:58 (twenty-two years ago)

  • if you want to see the story of the indomitable barbarian who wrests the crown of a glittering kingdom by force and finds that princehood and age make demands of him for which his long years of blood and lust could not have prepared him, keep reading the l.a. times.

    g--ff c-nn-n (gcannon), Friday, 17 October 2003 16:02 (twenty-two years ago)

    1-800-987-CDCD -- if they should star in the Broadway version of "Flash Gordon: The Musical"

    "Eeeeeeexcellent...everything is going according to plan."

    Ra's al Custos (Lord Custos Omicron), Friday, 17 October 2003 16:12 (twenty-two years ago)

    http://www.execulink.com/~joelb/scooby/episodes/nsdm/pics/baragang.jpg

    Horace Mann (Horace Mann), Friday, 17 October 2003 17:04 (twenty-two years ago)

    "Dude, you know you have really girly legs, right?"

    Kingfish (Kingfish), Friday, 17 October 2003 17:21 (twenty-two years ago)


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