Buddha, Defending Himself, Challenges the Designated Hitter Rule

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Headline of the day, from today's New York Times: "Muhammad, Defending Himself, Challenges Concept of 'Truth'." Unfortunately, the article did not live up to its title, for this is what it actually said:

"Mr. Muhammad began by asking what was the meaning of 'the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth?'

"He then offered a personal anecdote meant to demonstrate how difficult it is to determine truth, particularly when circumstantial evidence is involved. He said he had once told his daughter not to take any chocolate cookies from the cookie jar, but when he came home an hour later, he caught her with chocolate cookies. Her sister said she saw her taking cookies from the jar, and Mr. Muhammad said he had sharply admonished his daughter. But then her brother John explained that he had bought the cookies for her and that she had been putting extra cookies into the jar when her sister caught her.

"'She really didn't disobey me,' he told the jury. 'I asked her not to take cookies out of the cookie jar, and she didn't.'"

Now, though there's nothing inherently wrong with that example, I would expect the man who founded one of the world's major religions to come up with something more interesting to say about truth than, "I thought my daughter took the cookies from the cookie jar, but she didn't."

― Frank Kogan (Frank Kogan), Monday, 20 October 2003 20:09 (twenty-two years ago)

Dewey, Defending Himself, Challenges the Concept of Alphabetical Order.

― Frank Kogan (Frank Kogan), Monday, 20 October 2003 20:10 (twenty-two years ago)

Apprently, Buddha chose the wrong vessel to channel through.

(Admit this gave us a belly laugh, as well)

― Nichole Graham (Nichole Graham), Monday, 20 October 2003 21:41 (twenty-two years ago)

And here I thought I was linking to a validictory apology from Jerry Manuel ...

― brian nemtusak (sanlazaro), Monday, 20 October 2003 22:08 (twenty-two years ago)

What kind of kid puts cookies BACK in the jar??? That's a weird thing to do. "I've been boughten cookies, let me put them into the jar for no good reason"

― Allyzay, Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:48 (twenty-two years ago)

(BEST. THREAD TITLE. EVER.)

― NA (Nick A.), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:50 (twenty-two years ago)

Please don't mention libraries, I'm off sick.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 13:02 (twenty-two years ago)

Zoroaster, Defending Himself, Challenges the What Goes Up Must Come Down Rule

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 13:35 (twenty-two years ago)

Boadicea, Defending Herself, Kills Some Romans

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 13:54 (twenty-two years ago)

Albert Brooks, Defending Your Life

― Girolamo Savonarola, Tuesday, 21 October 2003 13:59 (twenty-two years ago)

This thread title's symmetry with the New York Times headline falls down though, for me. The designated hitter rule and its implications within baseball's symbolic scheme may be meditated on—and even challenged, if Buddha does things like that—until the end of time. Or at least until they get rid of it.

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 14:24 (twenty-two years ago)

Murphy, Defending His Law, Uses Cubs and Red Sox as Examples.

― earlnash, Tuesday, 21 October 2003 15:03 (twenty-two years ago)

I keep reading this as saying the "Designated Hitler Rule" btw.

― Allyzay, Tuesday, 21 October 2003 19:39 (twenty-two years ago)

"Would you like this pamphlet on Zionism?"
"No thanks, I'm designated Hitler tonight."

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 19:44 (twenty-two years ago)

The visions.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 19:47 (twenty-two years ago)

"Jamie, we're going out tonight; can you be designated Hitler?"
"No way, I was designated Hitler last time! Why can't Marshall do it?"

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 19:52 (twenty-two years ago)

Field Marshall Goering?

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 19:52 (twenty-two years ago)

Marshall Law

― Horace Mann (Horace Mann), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 19:54 (twenty-two years ago)

Horace OTM.

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 19:55 (twenty-two years ago)

Or possibly Marshall Crenshaw?
http://www.woodstockfilmfestival.com/other%20photos/marshall-crenshaw.jpg

― Horace Mann (Horace Mann), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 20:00 (twenty-two years ago)

Horace OnTheMarshall

― t\'\'t (t\'\'t), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 20:01 (twenty-two years ago)

http://www.frampton.com/marshall.jpg

― Horace Mann (Horace Mann), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 20:03 (twenty-two years ago)

May I just register a complaint here? Recently I've noticed many of my devotees leaving fruit for me at home and car shrines that is clearly past its "sell by" date. Lord Buddha neither condones nor particularly appreciates this behavior on a deeply personal level. Bad karma awaits anyone who leaves day-old products out on shrines. Furthermore, the use of Christmas lights on home shrines must be immediately halted.

Thank you for your attention to these details.

Yours in enlightened dogma and yoga (but not the really hard stretchy poses--please people--my neck, my back...)

Lord Buddha

― Lord Buddha, Tuesday, 21 October 2003 20:35 (twenty-two years ago)

Jesus, Defending Himself, Defies the Law of Gravity and Orbits Earth Seven Times

― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Wednesday, 22 October 2003 00:50 (twenty-two years ago)

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