using a public urinoir/lavatory but unable to pee because...

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i had this sort of thing this week again
sort of blatter block in front of the lavatory...

just cos you're standing between two other men peeing too

"i cannot concentrate, you idiots, go away!"

― eriik, Saturday, 25 October 2003 14:37 (twenty-two years ago)

stage fright

― Bryan (Bryan), Saturday, 25 October 2003 14:51 (twenty-two years ago)

"i guess this is where all the dicks hang out"

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Saturday, 25 October 2003 14:58 (twenty-two years ago)

There should be a system where every other urinal is out of order, so that men don't have to stand next to each other. It's the spacing issue. Obviously, public toilets would have to be twice as large as they are now, but the problem of repressed pee would be a thing of the past. And that's gotta be a good thing.

― jel -- (jel), Saturday, 25 October 2003 15:11 (twenty-two years ago)

Do as Nicholson Baker suggests and imagine pissing on their heads.

― N. (nickdastoor), Saturday, 25 October 2003 15:15 (twenty-two years ago)

why cant you all just piss in normal toilet cubicles?

― minna (minna), Saturday, 25 October 2003 15:18 (twenty-two years ago)

Normal toilet cubicles are sometimes pretty disgusting. I won't elaborate.

― jel -- (jel), Saturday, 25 October 2003 15:19 (twenty-two years ago)

hmm ok... i guess that's a pretty good excuse

― minna (minna), Saturday, 25 October 2003 15:20 (twenty-two years ago)

a) it's usually further to walk
b) it holds up people who actually need the cubicle
c) you have to touch more stuff
d) it suggests you have some kind of problem or are ashamed of your penis

― N. (nickdastoor), Saturday, 25 October 2003 15:21 (twenty-two years ago)

yes n., those are all valid points.
however, i was thinking more along 'why not abolish urinals if they cause men distress' lines

― minna (minna), Saturday, 25 October 2003 15:27 (twenty-two years ago)

as in, abolish the urinals and replace them with more cubicals. you wouldnt even have to close the door! but you would still have those protective cubicle dividers

― minna (minna), Saturday, 25 October 2003 15:28 (twenty-two years ago)

cubicles

― minna (minna), Saturday, 25 October 2003 15:29 (twenty-two years ago)

'why not abolish urinals if they cause men distress

o, it would be too much like women burning their bra's all over again.

minna, forgive us.

― eriik, Saturday, 25 October 2003 15:31 (twenty-two years ago)

i've had this problem since my early teens. I find it ABSOLUTELY impossible to pee at a urinal if there's anyone about. I have to use the cubicles in an bar/restaurant/work etc. It used to get me down, but now i've just accepted it.

Didn't know of anyone else with this prob - not really the thing you talk about is it!

― boy ashamed (Jack Battery-Pack), Saturday, 25 October 2003 15:39 (twenty-two years ago)

Sure it is - around here, anyway.
I enjoy the new-ish development of the urinal divider, just a bit of a partition between each urinal so that the fella next to you can stand there and stare at your dink (or be too close or whatever the actual thing is that bothers a dude) while you're trying to go.

― Bryan (Bryan), Saturday, 25 October 2003 15:43 (twenty-two years ago)

Urinals take up a lot less space than cubicles, so you can fit more in, and they are quicker to use. This is one of the reasons you don't get queues for men's loos. The other is that women are slow and useless, obv.

― N. (nickdastoor), Saturday, 25 October 2003 15:52 (twenty-two years ago)

surely they don't really take up less space if the men all need to stand a metre apart from one another

― minna (minna), Saturday, 25 October 2003 16:18 (twenty-two years ago)

They don't! And anyway, toilet bowls are more than a metre apart.

― N. (nickdastoor), Saturday, 25 October 2003 16:25 (twenty-two years ago)

Prison and army toilets: no walls or dividers. This should be abolished by the UN on human rights grounds.

― sucka (sucka), Saturday, 25 October 2003 16:31 (twenty-two years ago)

Ashamed could be me, except I have no shame. Consciously I have no problems peeing next to someone else. But for some reason it just doesn't happen. Frankly I don't understand why the cubicle isn't always the preferred choice, with urinals in reserve for when it gets crowded. Not that I want this to be the norm, cos then I'd never get to pee.

― Mark C (Mark C), Saturday, 25 October 2003 16:41 (twenty-two years ago)

why not abolish urinals if they cause men distress

i heard they have actually done this in sweden. or norway... or denmark.

― jed (jed_e_3), Saturday, 25 October 2003 18:55 (twenty-two years ago)

We need some sort of device that actually prevents 50 year-old guys making whimsical jokes about peeing/their organ to you

"Boy, this water sure is cold! Haha--" *THWOCK* "--OH JESUS MY KIDNEYS"

― nate detritus (natedetritus), Saturday, 25 October 2003 19:33 (twenty-two years ago)

If that slash wasn't there, that would be the most frightening sentence ever.

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Saturday, 25 October 2003 19:34 (twenty-two years ago)

Ha, the ensuing quote was a lot more frightening than that.

― nate detritus (natedetritus), Saturday, 25 October 2003 19:35 (twenty-two years ago)

over here you have urinals that consist of just one long undivided steal tank against the wall, they are the worst.

― eriik, Saturday, 25 October 2003 20:05 (twenty-two years ago)

I am rather ashamed of this, but yes I am a cubicle pee-er myself. I am powerless to will my bladder to action if anyone comes into the bathroom while I'm standing at the urinal, so I just head straight to the safe, private, four-walled little stalls.

― o. nate (onate), Saturday, 25 October 2003 20:09 (twenty-two years ago)

I have this problem sometimes. Not as bad as my best friend though. On our last road trip we had to stop FOUR times before he found a bathroom where he was comfortable enough to let loose. I was with him at the first bathroom---there was a crazy, smelly/dirty, old retarded man playing with napkins and shouting about something or other, so my friend's stage fright was understandable. After he couldn't go at the second one, I of course couldn't stop laughing and teasing him about it.

I remember going to baseball games as a kid and there were huge TROUGHS where 50 men could pee simultaneously.

I find doing a No. 2 to be even worse. I don't want people---even though that can't see who I am---to hear me plopping away. Or wiping. If someone comes into the stall right next to me, I oftentimes wait until their done before resuming.

― oops (Oops), Saturday, 25 October 2003 21:16 (twenty-two years ago)

dude, the funnest part of going to a game or to the Blind Pig to see a show is that you get to whiz in a trough.

ahhhh, so much area to cover.

― Kingfish (Kingfish), Saturday, 25 October 2003 22:47 (twenty-two years ago)

Can't you just kind of think, "It's not the worst thing if you don't pee, cos it happens to everyone", and then be relaxed, and eventually pee? It seems to be one of those incidents where only the person involved gives a fuck. Can you imagine going back to your table at a pub and saying, "Haha! There was a guy in there taking a while to pish" and the rest of the group going, "Haha! What a wally", and, when the guy finally comes out, everyone laughing and making gestures (gestures!)? No! Nobody gives a fuck but you! Just piss, ya freak.

― Eyeball Kicks (Eyeball Kicks), Saturday, 25 October 2003 23:05 (twenty-two years ago)

It's not one of those things that you can use logic and think your way out of. In fact, thinking about it just makes it worse. As does thinking you're a freak.

― oops (Oops), Saturday, 25 October 2003 23:09 (twenty-two years ago)

No, no, in every situation, thinking you're a freak makes things BETTER.

― Eyeball Kicks (Eyeball Kicks), Saturday, 25 October 2003 23:55 (twenty-two years ago)

Unless you really are a freak. And you're not, I'm sure.

― Eyeball Kicks (Eyeball Kicks), Saturday, 25 October 2003 23:57 (twenty-two years ago)

Eyeball Kicks, that's the whole point. There's NO REASON for it (apart from for Oops, who has problems with perceptions of masculine sexuality etc.) (just teasin', Oops), so there's no way to find a solution.

I have to admit that I usually try to pee in the urinal if I go into a deserted toilet, to try and wee-n (hoho) myself off this inconvenient habit. No luck so far.

― Mark C (Mark C), Sunday, 26 October 2003 16:08 (twenty-two years ago)

wee-n

My head is in my hands.

― adaml (adaml), Sunday, 26 October 2003 16:49 (twenty-two years ago)

You know which "head" I'm talking about.

― adaml (adaml), Sunday, 26 October 2003 16:49 (twenty-two years ago)

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