Close Encounters Of The In-Law Kind!

My mum and sister are basically Minneapolis' answer to Selma and Patty, and Ed is unlikely to meet them for a year or so. (phew!)

Ed's folks = very nice. No embarrassing stories apart from a popstar turning up to his sister's 21st in attempt to, erm, hold back the years. Ed's dad found this *hilarious*.

I always find meeting gfs' fathers more difficult than meeting their mothers. Maybe the fear of humiliation or (God forbid) physical violence is in the back of my mind. As for how early it is good etc to introduce yr partner to yr family, I really have no idea. As far as I can remember, this has always gone smoothly - exes have always liked my parents (at least that's what they told me heh heh).

I met HSA's mum quite early in our relationship, and I think it was good, not least because HSA's mum is astonishingly friendly and unbelievably sweet and nice, and she really went out of her way to make me feel welcome and part of the family.

Now... well, HSA is going to be meeting my family in Hertfordshire for the first time this weekend. (OK, technically, I don't think that we're actually blood related to them, but still, probably the closest thing that I have to family in this country.) I mean I'm sure it will be fine, as they are/have been particularly kind and nice to me, and I'm sure that HSA will meet their approval, but it's still a bit scary.

When I lived with my mother, I used to cringe at the idea of bringing home boys - not just with typical adolescent embarrassment, but, well, my mum is... well, a lot like me, but madder, more enthusiastic, and religious to boot. But with more recent experiences, I almost wish I still had that Family Filter - I bet my mum would have rumbled and weeded out various sociopaths and pathological liars that I've been involved with.

My father might not have existed for all the interaction that he's had with boyfriends, even while he was still living with us. (OK, apart from threatening to Set The Dogs on one boyfriend who outstayed his welcome, i.e. overnight.) Which is a shame, because HSA and my father would really get along, they share many interests in things like Radioastronomy and Oscilloscopes and AI and the Philosophy of Science and the like.

And now I've found out that my scary, borderline, right-wing brother is moving to England in January, but that's a whole nother can of worms/kettle of fish, etc. etc. ::bites nails::

I haven't met Sarah's mum, but she gets on well with my parents. One good thing is that she can see that the bossy, presumptuous side of me is directly inherited from them - I realised this the other day and felt strangely vindicated.

Supposedly, how your partner treats their opposite-gender parent is a good indication of how they will behave in their relationships towards you.

Which bodes well for me, as HSA and his mum have a good relationship, but perhaps this is why I don't want him to meet my family... he'll either get ideas from how they boss me around, or else get scared by how my dad and I ignore each other's existence. :-(

Here's a thing. What about the whole single-parent/problem-dad thing, because my dad's not fit for introduction, honestly.

Yeah, well, Freud kinda breaks down in the modern ages, doesn't he?

My dad's the way he is because of being a spoilt brat and benched jock, and when I asked my (divorced 20 years ago) mum why she married him, she didn't actually give me a reason.

I went to France with my future Father in Law on Saturday and had a jolly nice time.

Does anyone else have inlaws? Anyone? Bueller?

I met Isabel's parents on our first date! Neither of us could drive so somebody had to pick me up from the station. I remember it being pretty nerve-wracking but we get on fine now.

So do you think that early is better, i.e. get it over with, and avoid prolonging the nail-bitery?

Did you go on a Booze Cruise, Chris?

I don't think early is better - it can put a lot of pressure on the person being met, and it might send out the wrong signals about what 'kind of relationship' you want. Mind you it worked fine for me so it's obviously not a disaster.

See, I worry about the "sending the wrong signals" thing too early in the relationship (well, that doesn't apply if either of you still lives at home) - but then again, as HSA and I have been together for 7 months at this point, and live together, it's pretty much assumed that it's a Serious Relationship.

It's kinda creepy if a guy is all "Oh, meet my mother!" within a few dates.

PJ, yes we did, and to sort out their caravan for the winter, plus the added bonus of coming back with big lumps of horse, bits of rabbit, various black puddings and smelly cheeses.

My Inlaws didn't approve of me when they met me 7 years ago. Long hair, tattoo's, and a college drop out. They wanted more for their daughter. Well now I married their daughter and I suspect they are just fine with it. They are great people, but a little odd sometimes. Her moms from Norway and set in her Norwegian ways and her dad is a really smart guy who's interested in rocks and trees. And he loves womens sports. But they like good music so that helps.

I was living James' mum after 2 months! Luckily both sides of the in-laws get on really well with their future daughter/son in law. My mum hasnt met james' mum yet though, that's the last meeting.

Tom provides excellent material for a certain speech on Saturday!

SPEECH.

Full transcription demanded, of course.