what is the most valuable material thing you have ever taken?

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a lb of "buffalo chicken nuggets" today at the grocery store

― goato mountington (dubplatestyle), Sunday, 9 November 2003 21:28 (twenty-one years ago)

those self-checkout stands are not made for people like me

― goato mountington (dubplatestyle), Sunday, 9 November 2003 21:28 (twenty-one years ago)

oh i also ripped off $100 worth of BOOKS when i was 12 showing just what a geek i really was

― goato mountington (dubplatestyle), Sunday, 9 November 2003 21:32 (twenty-one years ago)

"was"

― goato mountington (dubplatestyle), Sunday, 9 November 2003 21:32 (twenty-one years ago)

playboys, LOADS

― cinniblount (James Blount), Sunday, 9 November 2003 21:35 (twenty-one years ago)

oh yeah i stole all my friends porno when i was like 13. when i think about how long it must have taken him to collect and steal it all himself...

― goato mountington (dubplatestyle), Sunday, 9 November 2003 21:36 (twenty-one years ago)

once I stole a sandwich from one of the 24hr kr0ger's here as in I went in, grabbed a loaf of bread, grabbed some sliced salami, grabbed some provolone, grabbed some brown mustard, went to an aisle at the end of the store away from the cashiers, made a sandwich, stuffed the sandwich in my jacket and left.

― cinniblount (James Blount), Sunday, 9 November 2003 21:38 (twenty-one years ago)

INSTALL CAMERAS KROGER OR FEEL MY WRATH!

― cinniblount (James Blount), Sunday, 9 November 2003 21:38 (twenty-one years ago)

About a year ago I did one of those "pay for 1, get 12" type of CD deals. They only sent me 6, but I never paid. I can't figure out who ripped off who.

― deathisahedgehog (deathisahedgehog), Sunday, 9 November 2003 21:45 (twenty-one years ago)

My student loan. About $70,000.

― Logged Out Regular, Sunday, 9 November 2003 21:49 (twenty-one years ago)

my father's university class ring.
which i subsequently lost.
when i was quite small.

― a sleepyshy speck o' sillysnow, Sunday, 9 November 2003 22:31 (twenty-one years ago)

$500 cash whilst drunk at a frat party

― oops (Oops), Sunday, 9 November 2003 22:53 (twenty-one years ago)

a ream of white A4 paper

hardcore!

― the surface noise (electricsound), Sunday, 9 November 2003 22:57 (twenty-one years ago)

A bunch of 20cent coins from mums purse so I could play Frogger at the bowling alley. Come on, I was like, 12. I've never stolen anything else, not even shoplifted - I'm just too much of a wuss.

― Trayce (trayce), Sunday, 9 November 2003 23:59 (twenty-one years ago)

At once? $500 cash, give or take, from my last bartending job. They cut my hours to practically nothing, and told me right before a Sat. night shift.

Over an extend period? $100 cash/week scamming the restaurant I worked at with voids and comps. About $3000 total.

― Logged Out, Even Though I've Got Nothing to Fear Legally, Monday, 10 November 2003 00:03 (twenty-one years ago)

A toothbrush. I was five or six. And it was sort of by accident, as I had been holding the toothbrush in my hand all throughout a trip to the supermarket. By the time the cashier had rung up all of the families' items (which usually was two to three shopping carts' full), I realized I still had the toothbrush in my hand and I froze, not sure what to do, and I ended up just hoping the cashier didn't see me.

I'm sorry I don't have a sexier story.

― Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Monday, 10 November 2003 00:19 (twenty-one years ago)

The USD$436 of ilxor donations that Jim and I spent on hookers and smack.

― Andrew (enneff), Monday, 10 November 2003 00:26 (twenty-one years ago)

it was so good i don't even remember it!!

― the surface noise (electricsound), Monday, 10 November 2003 00:28 (twenty-one years ago)

You're lucky, then!

― Andrew (enneff), Monday, 10 November 2003 00:30 (twenty-one years ago)

I thought everyone at least stole from their employer - all you kind, innocent do-gooders are giving me the creeps.

― miloauckerman (miloauckerman), Monday, 10 November 2003 00:31 (twenty-one years ago)

A new Basco jacket from my friend (who went to a different school obviously) when I was 15.

― Aaron A., Monday, 10 November 2003 00:34 (twenty-one years ago)

There ain't nothing at work worth stealing.

― Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Monday, 10 November 2003 00:38 (twenty-one years ago)

Daddino OTM.

― Andrew (enneff), Monday, 10 November 2003 00:39 (twenty-one years ago)

The new ILX server is one of the best machines in this builing, believe it or not!

― Andrew (enneff), Monday, 10 November 2003 00:39 (twenty-one years ago)

I once surreptitiously swapped the vinyl in a second hand record store so that I could own the vomit-splattered edition of the Plasmatics' New Hope For the Wretched (which they were asking probably about twenty bucks for) in the sleeve for the Plasmatics' Beyond the Valley of 1984 (for which they were probably only asking about five bucks for). This was in about 1985 or 1986. I still feel kinda bad about it.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Monday, 10 November 2003 00:40 (twenty-one years ago)

Two computers that ended up being stolen back. No one ever mentioned it again.
I was also enough of a geek to steal books when I was younger, including some really big ones (like 800 pages) by just putting them on the floor and kicking them out of the store.

― Dan I., Monday, 10 November 2003 01:00 (twenty-one years ago)

Define "stolen from employer" though. I mean a pack of post-it notes, sure. Bandwidth - definitely (as in, we're not supposed to download mp3s etc but everyone does).

But not like, money or expensive equipment. The idea seems pretty off to me, sorry.

― Trayce (trayce), Monday, 10 November 2003 01:04 (twenty-one years ago)

I once snapped one of the vinyls in a copy of The (blue) Beatles Anthology in a record store. I quickly put it back and left the store.

― Andrew (enneff), Monday, 10 November 2003 01:05 (twenty-one years ago)

I don't include my downloading at work as theft because I know for a fact it doesn't cost them anything extra at all.

― Andrew (enneff), Monday, 10 November 2003 01:05 (twenty-one years ago)

By stealing from an employer, I mean money or material goods. Maybe it's just the general succession of pointless jobs I've held for corporate chains, but stealing from your employer is routine among my social circle.

If any of us had real jobs, with something to lose by being found out, I suppose it would be different.

― miloauckerman (miloauckerman), Monday, 10 November 2003 01:08 (twenty-one years ago)

clearly god is punishing me for my stolen chicken through this intense foot pain

― goato mountington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 10 November 2003 02:06 (twenty-one years ago)

I have a real job. A little too real.

― Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Monday, 10 November 2003 02:07 (twenty-one years ago)

is that the tagline for your new sitcom?

― goato mountington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 10 November 2003 02:09 (twenty-one years ago)

£2,000 in twenty pound notes.

― D*m P*ss*nt*n* (Dom Passantino), Monday, 10 November 2003 02:13 (twenty-one years ago)

My "steal" was just as lame as Michael's -- I paid for one newspaper in one of those machines but ended up walking away with two of them. Accidentally, sure, but then I just went ahead and went with it. *laughs*

I *did* once do some serious damage to a stack of the local "alternative weekly", though. They're given out for free at various locations throughout the area. I was near one of the outdoor locations, waiting for a ride (I had back problems that day and thus couldn't drive), when I spotted the stack of papers and went wild and shredded them and left the whole area in a huge mess. By the time I was done, I could see my ride in the distance. Yay!

(*laughs* I suppose it was totally immature of me to do, but hey, I was younger, more immature, and still anti-superliberal.)

― Many Coloured Halo (Dee the Lurker), Monday, 10 November 2003 04:23 (twenty-one years ago)

dee you rebel!

― cinniblount (James Blount), Monday, 10 November 2003 04:27 (twenty-one years ago)

Holy moley.

― Andrew (enneff), Monday, 10 November 2003 04:58 (twenty-one years ago)

um...uh....

― goato mountington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 10 November 2003 05:00 (twenty-one years ago)

*laughs*

Well, this incident happened about five or six years ago! Surely we all can claim to have done at least one blindingly stupid thing in our lives!

I just ignore those periodicals now, btw. Maturity -- what a difference!

― Many Coloured Halo (Dee the Lurker), Monday, 10 November 2003 05:16 (twenty-one years ago)

When I was a teenager there were no electronic security devices or cameras in stores (I'm a little older than you-all, obv). My friends and I treated midtown Manhattan as if it were a gigantic unclaimed-goods dump: stacks of records from Record Hunter (one time we checked our piles in a locker at Grand Central and went back for more), stacks of books through the side exit at Brentano's (if there was a required text at school everyone had to buy we would take the entire stock and sell them for half price), clothes from Best & Co. (take enormous heap into fitting room, return half and leave wearing four layers). At the time I supposed that anyone who owned a store was rich (my father worked in a factory). Now I wonder how any of those businesses survived. (Thinks: Wait a minute...Record Hunter...Brentano's...Best & Co...all of them ceased to exist not long after!)

― Uncle (Methuselah), Monday, 10 November 2003 05:21 (twenty-one years ago)

I don't think I've ever knowingly stolen something. I found a $5 bill on the floor at church once and spent it on candy though, that's probably the worst I've done.

― JuliaA (j_bdules), Monday, 10 November 2003 06:06 (twenty-one years ago)

that's like the most innocent crime ever!

― s1utsky (slutsky), Monday, 10 November 2003 06:09 (twenty-one years ago)

I steal something almost every time I go grocery shopping. No camera balls and it's easy: if you buy a decent amt of items eg. 5 noone suspects you have batteries, shaving razors, cosmetics, film, or any compact untaggable products that are worth a lot for their size. One at a time though or the 'accidental pocketing' thing won't wash.

― Karen'sDock, Monday, 10 November 2003 06:16 (twenty-one years ago)

I can't stress how important it is to actually buy stuff WHILE stealing.

As for the question, a bunch of snowboards at a place where we had an inside guy that facilitated things. Worth thousands but sold for like 9 bills total, but whatever, I'll do anything to hurt the snowboarding industry, however small.

― Karen'sDock, Monday, 10 November 2003 06:21 (twenty-one years ago)

won't we all!

― s1utsky (slutsky), Monday, 10 November 2003 06:23 (twenty-one years ago)

i can't believe D@rren lectures rock stars on the morality of smoking in promo shots and thinks THIS is ok

oh, uh, a giant sized bag of Smarties and a roast chicken from a supermarket i was once gainfully employed by. they were going to throw them away!!!

― D@v3 M. (rotten03), Monday, 10 November 2003 06:25 (twenty-one years ago)

The only thing I ever stole from a store was a single bath bead from Pier One Imports as a little 6 year old.

I was such a gay little boy.

― Eric H. (Eric H.), Monday, 10 November 2003 06:30 (twenty-one years ago)

Question in general/to all - Is there a moral difference in theft from an individual/small store and theft from a corporation/chain?

― miloauckerman (miloauckerman), Monday, 10 November 2003 06:38 (twenty-one years ago)

Is there a moral difference in theft from an individual/small store and theft from a corporation/chain?

Depends what you believe in.

I personally am more saddened and disgusted by theft from individuals or small companies than that from large corporations. Economies of scale simply remove the personal, human aspect of theft and thus make it much less emotionally stressful for all parties involved.

― Andrew (enneff), Monday, 10 November 2003 06:47 (twenty-one years ago)

i almost stole some deodorant yesterday. i had forgotten that i'd put it into my shopping basket, and didn't notice it until after i had put the basket back and had already checked out. i went back and paid for it ... I R WUSS!

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Monday, 10 November 2003 06:47 (twenty-one years ago)

I stole some of my cousin's lego, but gave it back the next week saying "oh, I accidently put these in my pocket"...

Oh, and I convinced myself that I stole some Batman comics, because I couldn't remember where I bought them. Turns out I had bought them.

― jel -- (jel), Monday, 10 November 2003 19:59 (twenty-one years ago)

i went on a week-long rampage of theft from a waldenbooks in the mall when i was 15. 'demian' is one that i remember taking. i probably took some nietzsche, too.

― lauren (laurenp), Monday, 10 November 2003 20:26 (twenty-one years ago)

what is this self-checkout business? it sounds like asking for trouble.

― lauren (laurenp), Monday, 10 November 2003 20:30 (twenty-one years ago)

when I was 12, we used to steal Playboys from a local chain pharmacy/convenience store. But we would rip the covers off because we thought that the barcodes would set off the alarms. Then we'd just stuff 'em in our shirts.

About a year later we pulled a daring daylight heist at another store in the same chain. They used to have those cigarette display cases on the counters and one day we snatched it and ran. All the way across the street to the house of one of our gang. We didn't wear masks or anything. We were not criminal masterminds.

― Huckleberry Mann (Horace Mann), Monday, 10 November 2003 20:31 (twenty-one years ago)

Probably vicadin. It ain't cheap.

― Skottie, Monday, 10 November 2003 23:55 (twenty-one years ago)

On purpose, a bunch of car badges me and my friends ripped off cars when I was about 12. They probably only cost £20 or so each, but the damage? Ouch.

― mei (mei), Tuesday, 11 November 2003 00:13 (twenty-one years ago)

When I was about 10 I bought a model kit and the instructions were missing! I was desperate to start the kit and didn't want to wait for a replacement in the mail. So I calmly walked back into the Gemco and, with ice in my veins, slit open the plastic on an identical kit and took the instructions out, slipping them into my sleeve.

That is all I can remember ever stealing!

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Tuesday, 11 November 2003 00:24 (twenty-one years ago)

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