Somebody Gimme A Baseball Bat

Message Bookmarked

Bookmark Removed

so I can bash skull open

― cinniblount (James Blount), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:30 (twenty-one years ago)

aargh - FRED PHELPS' skull open

― cinniblount (James Blount), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:31 (twenty-one years ago)

He would do that.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:32 (twenty-one years ago)

isn't hanle y in Kansas? perhaps we can put him on the job.

― teeny (teeny), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:33 (twenty-one years ago)

seriously can we make a pact or something to each individually mail this guy a bag of shit or something?

― cinniblount (James Blount), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:35 (twenty-one years ago)

that's disgusting. here you go. *hands the bat over*

― Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:35 (twenty-one years ago)

Dammit, stupid filter. What did he say that was so offensive?

― Citizen Kate (kate), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:36 (twenty-one years ago)

3701 W. 12th Street
Topeka, KS 66604

― cinniblount (James Blount), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:36 (twenty-one years ago)

'Hate Minister Plans Monument Denouncing Matthew Shepard
October 17, 2003
Gfn.com News

A Kansas minister has announced plans to erect a monument denouncing slain gay college student Matthew Shepard and he's citing legal precedent to do it.

The Reverend Fred Phelps plans to put up a monument in a Casper, Wyo., park that would read, "Matthew Shepard entered Hell October 12, 1998, at age 21 in defiance of God's solemn warning: Thou shalt not lie with mankind as with womankind; it is abomination. Leviticus 18:22." '

― Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:37 (twenty-one years ago)

he want's to erect this monument in caspar, wyoming

― cinniblount (James Blount), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:37 (twenty-one years ago)

How did Matthew Shepard die?

However he died, that's what we should do to Rev. Phelps.

Cause you know, the Bible says "an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth" so it's OK.

― Citizen Kate (kate), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:38 (twenty-one years ago)

Tying him up against a fence and beating him to death is admittedly emotionally satisfying...

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:38 (twenty-one years ago)

TS: that "solemn warning" vs. THOU SHALT NOT KILL

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:39 (twenty-one years ago)

we should erect a monument in topeka of jesus giving paul lynde a blowjob while getting a rimjob from charles nelson reilly

― cinniblount (James Blount), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:41 (twenty-one years ago)

basically he want to put up a statue "commemorating" the killing of a young chap who was gay, with a plaque saying:

Matthew Shepard entered H ell October 12, 1998, at age 21 in defiance of God's solemn warning: Thou shalt not lie with mankind as with womankind; it is abomination. Leviticus 18:22.

he (the pastor bloke) deserves as many sacks of s hit as we can send him i say...

― CarsmileSteve (CarsmileSteve), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:41 (twenty-one years ago)

Well, it's nice to know that category "Racism And Hate" filters out Phelps' site.

― Citizen Kate (kate), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:41 (twenty-one years ago)

After you've killed him, we can erect a monument:

Fred Phelps entered Hell November 12, 2003, in defiance of God's solemn warning: Judge not lest ye be judged. Matthew 7:1

― Nemo (JND), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:42 (twenty-one years ago)

we should erect a monument in topeka of jesus giving paul lynde a blowjob while getting a rimjob from charles nelson reilly

...with an inscription reading "LOVE THY BROTHER".

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:42 (twenty-one years ago)

dude always comes up
here (Madison) to denounce
our evil lifestyle,

a.k.a. gays and
lesbians aren't often bashed
walking down the street

lots of folks show up,
yell right back at him and his
evil-ass minions

― Haikunym (Haikunym), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:43 (twenty-one years ago)

Maybe this is the part of the Bible he likes
"Now kill all the boys. And kill every woman who has slept with a man, but save for yourself every girl who has never slept with a man."
(Numbers 31:17-18)

― Huckleberry Mann (Horace Mann), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:44 (twenty-one years ago)

yeah yelling is nice
but a louisville slugger
is nicer

― cinniblount (James Blount), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:45 (twenty-one years ago)

that's a shitty haiku.

― teeny (teeny), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:45 (twenty-one years ago)

: (

― cinniblount (James Blount), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:46 (twenty-one years ago)

perhaps 'is more nicerer'?

― teeny (teeny), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:46 (twenty-one years ago)

and people wonder why early Christians wrote testaments fantasizing about riding side-saddle through rivers of their tormentors' blood

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:46 (twenty-one years ago)

I fucking hate Christians who don't actually pay attention to Jesus.

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:47 (twenty-one years ago)

i fully approve
of blount's haiku and intent
it roxxxxxx

― Haikunym (Haikunym), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:47 (twenty-one years ago)

I defer to the master (and lord of fantasy NBA as well)!

― teeny (teeny), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:48 (twenty-one years ago)

I cannot distinguish between three and five

― cinniblount (James Blount), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:48 (twenty-one years ago)

A proper haiku
To express my emotions
Is not feasible

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:48 (twenty-one years ago)

i get the feeling some ppl on this thread do not realize the exact manner in which he died? red Ned's 2nd post, it's actually a v. v. mild version of what some homophobes did to him

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:49 (twenty-one years ago)

Two homophobes beat him senseless then tied him to a fence. I believe he died of a combination of internal bleeding and exposure.

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:50 (twenty-one years ago)

And this fucking asshat wants to commemorate his death? If MS is in Hell, this dipshit is going to be UNDERNEATH Hell.

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:51 (twenty-one years ago)

Phelps has been doing this shit for years and has even visited OC for some reason. I've already been worked up enough over his follies; if I let it get to me emotionally again I wouldn't be able to function much. Figuring out how to support any action against this monument plan would be useful.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:52 (twenty-one years ago)

Ha! Dan you actually made me smile while this particular thread was open!!!! (By MS I assume you mean "Marge Schott")

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:53 (twenty-one years ago)

It is possible that Phelps will spend eternity being anally-violated by pitchforks, cheese graters and paring knives while spiny demon testicles are shoved up his nose and every bone in his body is systematically broken by tiny masturbating incubi with ball-peen hammers.

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:53 (twenty-one years ago)

All to the tune of "You Make Me Feel (Mighty Real)".

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:54 (twenty-one years ago)

this is one of those areas, DP, I agree, in which fucking syllable counts are meaningless. but it's easy to want to beat the fuck out of rev. fred...harder still to realize that that would give him the martyrdom he and his asslickers want.

harder still to NOT think about shit like this all the time. scritti politti helps; voting for good people helps more.

― Haikunym (Haikunym), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:54 (twenty-one years ago)

Tempting, Dan.

As it stands, is there anything legally about how any monument to the dead (positive or negative) would have to involve the estate or family?

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:55 (twenty-one years ago)

"Tempting"? Ned, are you Satan? Do you have a say in how people get tortured in Hell?

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:57 (twenty-one years ago)

(Days like today are when I feel like drafting a "don't be a dick" law.)

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:57 (twenty-one years ago)

I thought we both knew we had that power, Dan! Gollum, gollum...

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:58 (twenty-one years ago)

Who the shit is The Reverend Fred Phelps? Gimme the bat (Wendy) and I'll take a flight over there and shove the fat end up his ass while calmly reciting de Sade to him.

― Alex K (Alex K), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 16:58 (twenty-one years ago)

i bet you some man broke mr phelps' wha-tpasses-now-for-a-heart once, or his secret mancrush was never reciprocated, i reckon

from Cinniblount's news link I have a question: does anyone know what that "Summum religion" is?

- what context is this quote lifted from? very curious

― Vic (Vic), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 17:01 (twenty-one years ago)

I have no idea. I just ggld "crazy bible passages" and found it.

― Huckleberry Mann (Horace Mann), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 17:02 (twenty-one years ago)

I believe it's lifted from Numbers 31.

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 17:02 (twenty-one years ago)

All speech is protected, even hate speech. The funny part about this is that any monument these idiots erect will have to be under watch 24/7 or it's going to wind up unrecognizable within the first week. That's the fun thing about "public property."

― TOMBOT, Wednesday, 12 November 2003 17:02 (twenty-one years ago)

The best solution is to put up a monument next to it that says, "Hate makes you really, really stupid."

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 17:05 (twenty-one years ago)

we should erect a monument in topeka of jess giving paul lynde a blowjob while getting a rimjob from charles nelson reilly

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 17:07 (twenty-one years ago)

"erect"

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 17:10 (twenty-one years ago)

I say we just do a massive homoerotic flash-mobbing at the monument unveiling ceremony.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 17:11 (twenty-one years ago)

dressed like Moses!

― Huckleberry Mann (Horace Mann), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 17:11 (twenty-one years ago)

Moses love train

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 17:12 (twenty-one years ago)

monuments to hate don't tend to last, that's all I'm saying
http://www.hep.upenn.edu/~max/photos/travel/hammer_berlin_89.jpg

― TOMBOT, Wednesday, 12 November 2003 17:14 (twenty-one years ago)

There should be a monument to that dude's jeans, wtf!

― Allyzay, Wednesday, 12 November 2003 17:15 (twenty-one years ago)

40 years is a pretty long time

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 17:16 (twenty-one years ago)

that asshat was supposed to come to ann arbor a few years ago to protest a lesbian wedding or some shit, and the folks were ready for him. he ended up chickening out and just sending some of his goons.

big shindig on the diag that day, the central area/student commons between major buildings on campus. I wandered over on my lunch break(still worked at AMG at the time), and took pictures. One of the more vocal goons was getting into an argument with people as usual. He was wearing lots of U of Kansas(or KSU, whichever is purple/black) gear, so we figured it'd be fun to ask him if he preferred their basketball or football programs.

he ignored those questions, so then i started asking him if he preferred Star Wars to Empire or not. No response on those, either.

my buddy James got up next to him, just out of his eyesight, and started making funny faces for all the cameras. We started taking turns standing up by the guy(who couldn't see what we were doing) to have fun.

gimme a sec and i'll find the pictures from the event.

― Jay Dee Sah Mon (Kingfish), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 17:17 (twenty-one years ago)

people like this disgust me more than words can describe.
if something like what happened to matthew happens here again, and those fucks show-up with their "god hates fags" signs at his funeral, i have a brilliant plan to give them a taste of their own medicine. non-violent, of-course.

― dyson (dyson), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 17:21 (twenty-one years ago)

basically what i'll do (and you should too if happens near you). is join their little funeral protest and hand out some cheap homemade fliers - like "god is great, homos suck" type content - make shit up. i have a bi-friend in the printing industry and can make a bunch cheap - he'd be so down for this. so i go in with a variety of fliers geared towards all sorts of god hoarding hate-mongers. talk as many of them into signing up for a mailing list for my "good christians weekly" or whatever b.s. name i make up. i'll have another friend passing petitions against, say, being gay.

now any of them stupid enough to give me their home address will, within the next few weeks, have pamphlets delivered to al their neighbours. these fliers will contain all sorts of info on about what a bunch of ingnorant ass-hats their good christian neighbours are and calling on any decent person on the block to let their neighbours know what they think of them.

alot of work, but i can't explain how much i loath these types. maybe a stupid idea, but whatever - you gotta vent somehow.

― dyson (dyson), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 17:34 (twenty-one years ago)

Has anyone seen the TVNation in which Moore takes a trip to Kansas on his "love" tour and has the Los Angeles Gay Men's Chorus sing for Rev. Phelps? It's pretty good. What's better is the interview with Phelps and his grandchildren that was deemed not fit for tv. In it, Rev. Phelps, Mr. Holier-than-Thou-morality-master is talking about how he is spreading his teachings to all members of his family. He then turns to his four year old grandson and asks what a "fag" is. The four year old (can I mention that again...the FOUR YEAR OLD CHILD) responds that a "fag" is "a man that shoves his dick up another man's ass." He then asks his granddaughter (ABOUT FOUR AS WELL) what a lesbian is. She quickly replies "a woman who sticks her fist and fingers up another womans hole" (or something along those lines). So, it seems that Mr. Morality not only likes to put up horrific monuments, but he also likes to graphically describe sex acts to his grandchildren. Somehow I think that most "Christians" would probably agree that anal sex and fisting are not really dinner table conversation topics--especially with pre-school aged children. What a fucking moron.

― cybele (cybele), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 17:36 (twenty-one years ago)

in toronto, we used to have a citizen, named zundel, who was a holocaust denier.
his house had been torched, i think, like 3 or 4 times.

doesn't stuff like this happen to the good rev. phelps at all¿ he seems pretty belligerent for a man that must be so widely hated.

― dyson (dyson), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 17:48 (twenty-one years ago)

found my pics!

from ann arbor
more
my friend has fun
smile for the cameras!
here, a pie was thrown

― Jay Dee Sah Mon (Kingfish), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 18:28 (twenty-one years ago)

Some people think that just because they're persecuted means they're doing something right.

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 18:34 (twenty-one years ago)

If I saw Phelps and his ilk I would have to find some girl to make out with in front of them all. Mr. Robotico would understand.

I can understand the impulse towards violence against these people but it would just end up giving them the martyrdom they crave.

― El Diablo Robotico (Nicole), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 18:35 (twenty-one years ago)

Make-out protests should follow them wherever they go. Also, someone should pass their address out to porn distributors.

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 18:37 (twenty-one years ago)

Phelps and his crew visited Bellingham, WA to denounce a girl who won "Prom King" at her high school..(see's she's lesbian, and it was just a big joke from the school to give her that honor.) Rev tried to come and ruin the fun but it actually fueled a lot of publicity and basically was made more fun when Phelps was run out of town.

This, however, is not nearly as funny. Of course it's sickening. Though I have to admit I can't get too worked up about Phelps any more. He's way past his third encore. Phelps is like GG Allin, almost, in the sense that he's trying too hard to show people "See? How EXTREME I am?". and gets the big ho-hum from me.

― donut bitch (donut), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 18:37 (twenty-one years ago)

(I should add, the "Prom King" girl in question was well in on the joke and was proud of it... if i didn't make that more clear, sorry)

― donut bitch (donut), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 18:38 (twenty-one years ago)

YES! Same-sex couples listlessly making out in front of them wherever they go!

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 18:38 (twenty-one years ago)

someone should pass their address out to porn distributors
~ will do.

― dyson (dyson), Wednesday, 12 November 2003 19:42 (twenty-one years ago)

Fred Phelps came to lexington about a year or so ago to protest a gay couple getting their child baptised. it was all over the news. luckily lexington has a large homosexual population (per capita) and the only attention he recieved was negative, mostly tasteful and quiet mocking. no one joined him in his hate speech outside the church, and he was mostly just given dirty looks or ignored. there was a small anti-phelps crowd, but they remained pretty civil and dignified.

i think baseball bat death would be to kind, something slower would be better.

― Emilymv (Emilymv), Thursday, 13 November 2003 00:39 (twenty-one years ago)

Baseball bat sodomy death would be slow, and kind of appropriate.

― Matt (Matt), Thursday, 13 November 2003 00:40 (twenty-one years ago)

- you rang?

― cinniblount (James Blount), Thursday, 13 November 2003 10:20 (twenty-one years ago)

The Batter of LOVE.

(Ew, that just suggested something.)

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 13 November 2003 15:53 (twenty-one years ago)

Phelps won't go where he's outnumbered. He chickened out of coming to Chicago, too, because thousands of people were ready for him.

― Kerry (dymaxia), Thursday, 13 November 2003 16:00 (twenty-one years ago)

LOVE BATTER makes the PANCAKES OF PASSION

― Jay Dee Sah Mon (Kingfish), Thursday, 13 November 2003 16:00 (twenty-one years ago)

Wow, I forgot all about Rev. Phelps being in Lexington last year. The guys that make up that particular man-union he came here to protest the commencement of are two of our clients! They're the nicest guys ever.

I think he thought coming here would be all good, I think his buddy Pastor Jeffrey Fugate (you should hear some of the things this man says wow UGH) told him a bunch of hooey and he wasn't prepared for us.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Thursday, 13 November 2003 16:06 (twenty-one years ago)

"bash skull open" should be a category

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Saturday, 15 November 2003 03:07 (twenty-one years ago)

You must be logged in to post. Please either login here, or if you are not registered, you may register here.