This thread is a dark alley way. Smells of mildew and littered with baby diapers. (Action thread battle royale to get crunked on a friday) < FITE! >

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*Out of the shadows is launched at a high rate of speed, the base of a discarded mixing blender that smashes you in the nose.*

//smash!//

Spinktor the Unmerciful (mawill5), Friday, 21 November 2003 16:21 (twenty-one years ago)

look blender

teeny (teeny), Friday, 21 November 2003 16:23 (twenty-one years ago)

*Teeny did not correctly assess the severity of the situation and was quickly decapitated by a piece of rusty sheet-metal*

Spinktor the Unmerciful (mawill5), Friday, 21 November 2003 16:25 (twenty-one years ago)

Baby diapers? Mixing blenders? Michael Jackson, we have the alley surrounded! Come out moonwalking with your hands above your head.

Huckleberry Mann (Horace Mann), Friday, 21 November 2003 16:27 (twenty-one years ago)

doesn't teeny get a saving throw?

vahid (vahid), Friday, 21 November 2003 16:29 (twenty-one years ago)

*Mann, thinking he had the perp surrounded was not aware that speeding towards him was an out of control hipster on a Vespa. Skidding out of control, the scooter severs Mann's right leg leaving him in a puddle of his own blood.*

//Officer down//

Spinktor the Unmerciful (mawill5), Friday, 21 November 2003 16:30 (twenty-one years ago)

Michael Jackson and mixing blenders go together... how? Does Jacko make a mean frappe or something?

Casuistry (Chris P), Friday, 21 November 2003 16:30 (twenty-one years ago)

I don't know. I doubt that he's ever changed a diaper either.

Huckleberry Mann (Horace Mann), Friday, 21 November 2003 16:31 (twenty-one years ago)

*Due to vahid's questioning of the rules, he/she instantly develops a painful urinary tract infection leaving them in a fetal possition near a fire hydrant.*

//no rules//

Spinktor the Unmerciful (mawill5), Friday, 21 November 2003 16:31 (twenty-one years ago)

::slips into thread quietly::

KICKS SPINKTOR IN THE TEETH!!!

::slips out again quietly leaving a trail of broken bottles behind her::

Citizen Kate (kate), Friday, 21 November 2003 16:31 (twenty-one years ago)

Kate=

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Huckleberry Mann (Horace Mann), Friday, 21 November 2003 16:34 (twenty-one years ago)

*Steals Citizen Kate's passport therefore making her illegal in Detroit(where the fight is), resulting in deportation. Only after her knees are smashed in with oversized decorative tiki forks.*

Spinktor the Unmerciful (mawill5), Friday, 21 November 2003 16:34 (twenty-one years ago)

Excellent. Such dignified company!

MWAH HAH HAH HAHAHAHAHAH!!!

::broken glass and tinkly laughter rain down upon the alley::

X-POST...

Kate, laughing, produces her GREEN CARD and runs away scot free!

Citizen Kate (kate), Friday, 21 November 2003 16:35 (twenty-one years ago)

*Casuistry is still reeling from the wicked neck blow from a previous thread. In the confusion of the battle, they bite Huckelberry Mann on their achiles tendon.*

Spinktor the Unmerciful (mawill5), Friday, 21 November 2003 16:36 (twenty-one years ago)

GastroIntestinal Stasis got mentioned TWICE it's so silenty but deadly!

Casuistry (Chris P), Friday, 21 November 2003 16:38 (twenty-one years ago)

oberflugleutnant pashmina swoops down piloting gotha 229 flying wing. strafes spinktor w/4 x 30mm cannon. dental records used to identify remnants of spinktor.

Pashmina (Pashmina), Friday, 21 November 2003 16:38 (twenty-one years ago)

***Spinktor makes a run for the border, gets a 7-layer burrito and consumes it in one bite, but chokes on a bit of it and stands there, hacking for a while, turning blue in the face, until finally hacking the offending burrito into a nearby diaper.***

Casuistry (Chris P), Friday, 21 November 2003 16:40 (twenty-one years ago)

uber...

Pashmina (Pashmina), Friday, 21 November 2003 16:41 (twenty-one years ago)

::St.Claire's Cloak of Secrecy and Pashmina's Pashmina get in deadly outergarment FITE, flapping about and threatening to choke us both::

Citizen Kate (kate), Friday, 21 November 2003 16:42 (twenty-one years ago)

*Stench Daemon arises from pile of festering baby diapers, begins chucking lumps of rotten poo at ilxors within range, screams out in its gutteral growl "PEEYOONEE HEEYOOMUUHNS"*

nickalicious (nickalicious), Friday, 21 November 2003 16:43 (twenty-one years ago)

***NA starts a thread with an extremely long title, confounding Spinktor's ADD, and takes advantage of the confusion by poking his eyes out a la the 3 Stooges***

NA (Nick A.), Friday, 21 November 2003 16:43 (twenty-one years ago)

*Pashmina flies through a flock of Canadian Whooping Cranes, sucking one into the jet intake causing her to land in a field full of jagged sheet-metal.*

//gored on metal spikes through both shoulders and calf muscle//

Spinktor the Unmerciful (mawill5), Friday, 21 November 2003 16:43 (twenty-one years ago)

*Mentioning the ADD sends Spinktor in a Hulk-like rage. Now 15-feet tall and orange, Spinktor roars in defiance as he smashes random shit with his massive left foot.*

//stink foot//

Spinktor the Unmerciful (mawill5), Friday, 21 November 2003 16:46 (twenty-one years ago)

*NA is the first casualty of the indescriminate tossing of diapers by the Stench Daemon."

Spinktor the Unmerciful (mawill5), Friday, 21 November 2003 16:47 (twenty-one years ago)

"PASHMINA IS A HIM NOT A HER, YOU SEXIST TWUNT!!!" cries St.Claire The Silent Killer and lurches forward to lop off Spinktor's 'Nads.

::Blood spurts everywhere::

Citizen Kate (kate), Friday, 21 November 2003 16:48 (twenty-one years ago)

*Stench Daemon notices Spinktor's Hulkification and climbs up the walls of the alley with his sticky poop-hands, from his perch above drops onto Spinktor with his signature Self-Destruct Fecal Splash attack, is once again rendered ethereal consciousness only to return again whence summoned.*

//massive fecal pile//

nickalicious (nickalicious), Friday, 21 November 2003 16:53 (twenty-one years ago)

*The Body Shop rushes to introduce new "Fecal Splash" line of after-shower rinses.*

Casuistry (Chris P), Friday, 21 November 2003 16:54 (twenty-one years ago)

That's quite enough.

Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 21 November 2003 16:54 (twenty-one years ago)

*NA doesn't really give a shit that he's dead, in fact he's kind of glad to not be involved in this mess*

NA (Nick A.), Friday, 21 November 2003 16:55 (twenty-one years ago)

Lush counters with their own product... The Number Three Bath Bomb!

Citizen Kate (kate), Friday, 21 November 2003 16:55 (twenty-one years ago)

*Carpenter ants disport themselves in elaborate Busby Berkeley dance routines over NA's body.*

Casuistry (Chris P), Friday, 21 November 2003 16:57 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.hse.gov.uk/campaigns/images/crushwheel3.jpg

Huckleberry Mann (Horace Mann), Friday, 21 November 2003 16:59 (twenty-one years ago)

*pashmina, despite being impaled on a skewer, pulls out bloodstained linux laptop, & using k-31337 sk|llz0rz, gains r00t access/0wn4g3 to spinkt0r'z k-l4m3 w|n 95 b0x0r. Mildly annoyed by being referred to as 'her', uploads "calum" virii, which immediately uses full bandwidth of spinktor's computer to connect to naked celebrity sites. Spinktor's aid defense system thus disabled, Pashmina calls in air strike using fearsome luftwaffe power of 114 arado 234 jet bombers, each armed w/2 x 'fritz-x' guided bombs. remnants of spinktor cleaned up w/squeezy mop & bucket & taken away for dna id.

Pashmina (Pashmina), Friday, 21 November 2003 17:04 (twenty-one years ago)

*To which Spinktor can only answer with, "Damn, yo. That sucked."*

Spinktor the Unmerciful (mawill5), Friday, 21 November 2003 17:09 (twenty-one years ago)

*For pointing out Spinktors flaw, all attention is paid to C Kate. Through concentration of thoughts via superbrainmanguy Spinktor, her head explodes causing everyone to vomit uncontrolably.*

//queue Robert Palmer's legion of back-up musician death squad//

Spinktor the Unmerciful (mawill5), Friday, 21 November 2003 17:11 (twenty-one years ago)

*The spirit of the Stench Daemon is once again summoned, this time in the form of the 2% milk that Ned Raggett is drinking. Forcing the inevitable complete evacuation of his bowels.*

Spinktor the Unmerciful (mawill5), Friday, 21 November 2003 17:13 (twenty-one years ago)

*In a babe ruth fashion, Spinktor and the puddle of stench daemon call out Amateur!st, TOMBOT, Allyzay, and any j.lu. (Only because those are the only other names he can think of on the spot that arent already a victem of the alley way super brawl.)*

Spinktor the Unmerciful (mawill5), Friday, 21 November 2003 17:16 (twenty-one years ago)

*Pashmina suffers from severe lag and HER ILX session times out.*

//Blue Screen Of Death//

Spinktor the Unmerciful (mawill5), Friday, 21 November 2003 17:17 (twenty-one years ago)

*Suddenly all of Europe bursts into green flames.*

Spinktor the Unmerciful (mawill5), Friday, 21 November 2003 17:24 (twenty-one years ago)

http://kyle.mtholyoke.edu/quake/shambler.gif

look out behiiiiiind you...., Friday, 21 November 2003 17:26 (twenty-one years ago)

(lord help us all when custos discovers this one)

Pashmina (Pashmina), Friday, 21 November 2003 17:27 (twenty-one years ago)

*I sidle up to Pashmina, and firmly place my arm around his waist. "Ah, you were never that far away, were you?" and slowly begin undoing the laces of his tunic, while tasting the raw and sweaty flesh along his neck. Occasionally I squeeze him, strongly, to remind him who is in charge here, who is master and who is servant in tonight's play.*

Spinktor the Uncircumcized (Chris Piuma), Friday, 21 November 2003 17:28 (twenty-one years ago)

*Spinktor's rage increases causing California to sink into the Pacific abyss. Rage subsides when he realizes Pashmina wears tunics. Because thats just dumb.*

Spinktor the Unmerciful (mawill5), Friday, 21 November 2003 17:30 (twenty-one years ago)

*Attempting to surprise Spinktor, Pashmina's pants dropped to his ankles causing him to explode in embarassment.*

Spinktor the Unmerciful (mawill5), Friday, 21 November 2003 17:35 (twenty-one years ago)

*Hm, embarrassment smells like chlorine. I wonder what it tastes like...*

Spinktor the Uncircumcized (Chris Piuma), Friday, 21 November 2003 17:37 (twenty-one years ago)

*Spinktor looks at his watch and realizes he should be at work.*

//Exit Spinktor//

Spinktor the Unmerciful (mawill5), Friday, 21 November 2003 17:42 (twenty-one years ago)

http://bitchcakes.topcities.com/images/crappyfountain.jpg

Allyzay, Saturday, 22 November 2003 03:53 (twenty-one years ago)

The Pizza Christ gang roars in on a color-coordinated set of Harleys, middle fingerz ov d00m cocked and loaded and ready to vindicate Spinktor. We point said fingers at P@$hm1n@, unleashing...a swarm of moths, which devour the cashmere of his tunic, leaving him all but naked, with nothing more than the dirty diapers with which to cover his nakedness. The gang high-fives one another, and revving up the Harleys, zooms off to catch the Turbonegro show.

P@$hm1n@ is alone in the alleyway, clutching a stained diaper to his loans and wondering what's next.

j.lu (j.lu), Saturday, 22 November 2003 04:49 (twenty-one years ago)

*Leee "Theee Bioniccc Mannn" Majors intercepts Spinktor, throws him into the ropes and into a SPINEBUSTER. Over his prostrate body, Leee "Theee Rabiddd Wolverineee" Majors kicks Spinktor's arm, and removing his elbow pad and throwing it into the crowd PEOPLE'S ELBOW! flips Spinktor over and applies the CRIPPLER CROSSFACE*

//http://smackdown.wwe.com/superstars/benoit_c/images/01.jpg//

Leee Majors (Leee), Saturday, 22 November 2003 05:32 (twenty-one years ago)

//http://smackdown.wwe.com/superstars/benoit_c/images/01.jpg //

Leee Majors (Leee), Saturday, 22 November 2003 05:32 (twenty-one years ago)

*Nate walks in; does stuff; leaves before stuff is done to him*

//general bafflement//

nate detritus (natedetritus), Saturday, 22 November 2003 05:47 (twenty-one years ago)

Oh yeah...forgot about this. What was I thinking?

Spinktor the Unmerciful (mawill5), Monday, 24 November 2003 14:12 (twenty-one years ago)

Same thing you were thinking when you busted up yr chair and wall, dude.

Allyzay, Monday, 24 November 2003 14:33 (twenty-one years ago)

Are you talking about the poker game friday night?

We really jumped the shark when we slammed the jelly-filled donut holes against the wall and Anthony chipped a couple golf balls.

Spinktor the Unmerciful (mawill5), Monday, 24 November 2003 15:17 (twenty-one years ago)

What I don't understand is why you'd do that to your own house; I mean you should've gone over Luke's or something.

Allyzay, Monday, 24 November 2003 16:26 (twenty-one years ago)

two weeks pass...
Whatever Ally.

*Smashes her teeth in with an electric can-opener.*

//BOOM!//

El Spinktor (El Spinktor), Friday, 12 December 2003 20:05 (twenty-one years ago)

//Sets thread on fire and walks away.//

El Spinktor (El Spinktor), Friday, 12 December 2003 20:06 (twenty-one years ago)

Are you trying to say that trashing Luke's house isn't sensible or clever? What the fuck.

Allyzay, Friday, 12 December 2003 20:09 (twenty-one years ago)

I dont even know if that fucker has a house right now. Where does he live anyway?

El Spinktor (El Spinktor), Friday, 12 December 2003 20:10 (twenty-one years ago)

The Rapture, I think.

Allyzay, Friday, 12 December 2003 20:11 (twenty-one years ago)

Are you trying to say that trashing Luke's house isn't sensible or clever? What the fuck.

Better than trashing your own house, at least.

j.lu (j.lu), Saturday, 13 December 2003 14:47 (twenty-one years ago)

eleven months pass...
I forgot about this little gem...

Spinktor, Friday, 26 November 2004 21:51 (twenty years ago)


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