Apart from when I don't and I go "Gaaah" and either retype of forgetaboutit..

2) In my first post I was just kidding, I'm kinda surprised by the sarky/serious response.

It must have been a 24 hour bug though as I feel pretty much ok today. Either that or I'm pregnant. watch this space...

That's what I was going to post, I am not commenting on this thread.

I also almost asked another qn on ILM but I think a similar one has been asked recently.

:(

Boy : "Do you know any really loud love songs?"
Russian : (without looking up) "Is pig made of ham?" (keeps noodling)

Funnily enough, someone in my office was just talking on the phone to someone in Lagos.

PIGFUCKER

(and I didn't post this only because I couldn't come up with an equally accurate but less offensive word for retarded).

Goodbye...you'll find me in the shadows at night

http://192.80.61.159/HTML/Academic/history/HI14Net/delacroix.jpg

my next post isn't

http://news.bbc.co.uk/olmedia/1755000/images/_1759230_giantexam150.jpg

I actually had your address, jel, but I lost my address book somewhere in the past two months apparently so I need addresses from everyone all over again :(

Actually if anyone besides Bryan did send me an address and I didn't reply you should send it again. Not that they will now arrive before Xmas!!

(apart from the viagra)

-- Dan Perry (djperr...), December 18th, 2003 5:21 PM."

I see you still have all those chinese prisoners locked up in you basement?

Its funny that I am even bothering to make this distinction, since its just obvious that I'll probably keep lingering on the board and pop on by from time to time - especially if Julia ever testimonializes me on that thread. I genuinely feel pretty bad/stupid/awful/worthless now that I am soo behind on Kate's chart (yeah, only 9 months), and that my godawful, sickening, obnoxious habit of procrastination (which must be _pathological_ I am convinced - see how that overdue paper thread was started by me?) has stalled me from completing it, as well as getting around to Ms. Laura's (who NEEDS it)... if Julia ever revives that shit in January or whatever, I am so there.

But that's precisely the reason I want to stay away from aim chatting for now - I am tempted to enter every one I am invited to and find myself not getting anything done that I should - like working on horoscopes, reading more on different systems of analysis and calculation, going forward with my scripts and screenplays, working out and writing film ideas and actually doing something productive with life if I wish for it to go anywhere. I mean as much as I love talking to a lot of you, at the end of I'm wondering whether or not "chat," endlessly ruminating on something I find to be pretty trivial (pop culture) etc, is just a waste of time or not for someone who's largely unemployed-except-for-garbage-retail-jobs-and-doesn't-have-the-time-wasting-luxury/or-need-of-posting-from-an-office... since I question whether or not I'm learning anything from any of this, and I have to be honest and say no. I also often wonder whether I'm a fish out of water (or perhaps swimming in an incorrect/dangerous depth) whenever the discussion veer toward the abstract in any way since then go off and make a spectace of myself by posting steams on (metaphysical, etc) subjects no one here gives a shit about - I shouldn't discuss the rigors of Saturn with people who care more about kittens or postpunk - but damn if I'm not guilty of messing arond with stuff like friendster (sorry!) or "bukkake" etc myself - it's just too easy here. I _love_ the cyber interaction but I know that I'm not going to meet most of you, who will largely remain words on a screen as opposed to ever becoming a (literally) extra-textual presence in life (barringafewfantasiesumwhoa)... and the screen is pretty much driving me blind by this point. I do the dimming-the-light thing when I read at times which is so unhealthy for my eyes!!

I now (!!) believe that "Internet Addiction" is a serious illness, and as someone who's in one way or another been dealing with it for 7 years, I have to realize that now that college is over, if I ever want to accomplish anything enough is enough now - I have to cut back and really try to be judicious with my time. I'm not on here because there's not much happening in my life, but on the contrary there's at time so much oddness or overwhelming intensity in various doses taking place that I've used the Internet as a major distraction (which is so stupid, inflicted as I am with Chronic Procrastinitis), unintentionally getting dragged into its miasmic addictiveness and yet compulsively coming back for more. Of course I could blame some of you for this too, if you just weren't so damned attractive and intelligent and endearing...< g> I wish to emphasize though that this is just a personal situation with me, and in no way reflects upon anyone else here. I really envy the types who can just post/chat/review endless music/filmic-reviews-which-are-totally-irrelevant-to-their-actual-lives at work or the OFFICE, etc and then come home and not even think about signing on; I'd be much too stimulated by the often entertaining exchange of ideas/jokes on here to resist, even if I had an office...

So anyway, yes, to try to solve my dilemma I put a lot of AIM names on block for now, especially the ones who chat a lot..and I felt so guilty about this! Haha.. I've done his before, it's just oneo f those hiatus cycles, yadda, I could say, but this time it feels different - I have been out of school for exactly a year now, and it's time to get serious and try even harder, rather than talking to wonderful long-distance friends/cyber strangers who have no direct bearing on my various daily realities. Discipline! Self-control! Argh! Masturbation? I have a really strong drive that's been buried for quite a while, and all this employment adversity would have kick-started it already...if I had gotten offline. I cannot make anymore excuses for myself; every day we are closer to death without realizing it, and usually go on about unconsciously squandering our time on small things rather than looking at the big picture, and then ask ourselves "where did the years fly?" I just wanted to point out that if I'm sure I may have forgotten to block some names as I was trying to think of all of them off the top of my head, it's nothing personal..so please don't take it that way!

So, now that my overlong speech #47475675796 is over, I just want to give a shout out to all my peepz here, U know who U be..I'll definitely be around the boards but let's just say I'll "chat" later!!

love,
V

But: in terms of the horoscope chat we had on AIM: you had a lot of general stuff right. Lots of time frames that you cited *were* periods that were good, or difficult, or whatever. You were of course very correct that this phase of my life really sucks--ha. The most interesting thing was a specific(recent) time that you said was a major shift with things in my life. You named two dates(spanning maybe 2 weeks?). I *did* have a recent big change in my life, at the time I thought it was temporary but things haven't been the same since. I looked back in my calendar (I keep track of some things in everyday life), and the date that things shifted dramatically for me was right in the middle of those dates you'd said actually. I *do* prattle on about personal things somewhat on ILX, but this was something that I hadn't talked about.

Now I'm curious so I'm doing a search on myself during that time period and it's all my typical blahblah. Nothing that would indicate what was going on with me. Nothing about my posts seem any different from the sort of everyday bullshit that I always post.

I don't know if/when I'll get to that thread, Vic, but I will say that it was really cool to get that horoscope reading. As I've said, there was some reeally fucking interesting accuracies.

Wtf, I have to get up in the morning, I will be hating myself.

That's my epitaph right there.

They try to isolate victims from family and friends
They minimize and deny their behavior
They veil power and control over others
They blame victims
They distrust others
They usually have low self-esteem
They are not in touch with their own feelings