My turn for an advice thread.

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I have been suffering recently from depression. This isn't a new thing, and it's not nearly as bad as the last time I suffered from it in any major way (c.1997). A key difference is that back then I found the idea of socialising in every way stressful and horrible, whereas now going to the pub/hanging round with friends/doing stuff is a surefire way of escaping the gloom and having a really good time. Also the depressive moods this time out are nowhere near as frequent. The depression then, I think, was clinical, and now I'm just low.

However I can't spend my whole life down the pub (NB if a plausible way round this proviso can be found, I'm all ears), and I have only a limited amount of energy with which to throw myself into good works, etc. I was hoping to write myself out of it but that doesn't seem to be working - I'm finding writing wretchedly difficult both in terms of starting and finishing, and what I do write seems purposeless. On the other hand going onto anti-depressants again would be a) a defeat and b) would on past experience zombify me and c) seems currently like a severe over-reaction.

So - any ideas? I'm sick of it, really. Ideally I want some kind of practical hints as to how to get a grip on myself and how to kickstart whatever creative stuff I want to do, without relying on medication. Thanks in advance, people.

Tom, Wednesday, 10 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

If you can afford it, try a holiday/getting out of London for a few days. Preferably somewhere you've never been/have to speak in a different language etc. The change might work.

On the other hand, what do I know?

Good luck!

Bill E, Wednesday, 10 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I will feel much better tomorrow morning and will probably feel embarassed for posting this. I feel better already for posting it, actually. But the problem remains and I'll still be grateful for any help.

Tom, Wednesday, 10 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

DG is being rubbish at advice, but has found one thing better than the non-existant Robot Vs Dinosaur - Zeppelin Vs Pterodactyls! That should cheer you up a bit.

DG, Wednesday, 10 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

i was really nervous about anti depressents until i started taking effexor xr which is AMAZING !

anthony, Wednesday, 10 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I want to help very much, I dont know if I can. But not because I have no idea about what depression is like, I do.

I find it difficult to see depression or even just "low-ness" as an entirely negative thing. Sure, you dont want it controlling your life and restricting you, but you said that you are sick of it and that sounds like you don't feel powerless over it.

From what you write, I suspect that you live a very examined life, which is something of a burden, but much better than walking around not even thinking about how you live, how you feel, who you are. How boring would that be? How rewarding would that be?

People who get low, get depressed, they are the brave people. I cherish my melancholy. If I didnt have it, my life would be less rich, less beautiful.

I say that though with the benefit of hindsight. There was a time when I felt powerless over the sadness, but maybe even then I always knew deep down that I would climb out and that my life would be all the more wonderful for having experienced a blacker side of it.

The ways I started to make myself feel better were very superficial at first. I bought new dresses etc, made a conscious effort to gain some weight and start feeling beautiful again. Forced myself to grab life and shake it. Like the alcoholics anonymous thing, "act as if".

DONT BE HARD ON YOURSELF, dont worry if your writing has starting or finishing. Do nice things for yourself, and take it seriously. Be selfish. Embrace everything about yourself. Go to the pub every night if it makes you happy, just do what makes you happy. Be gentle with yourself. I dont know if you ever feel guilty about being sad, but I used to and that was wrong. Own your depression, make it yours.

I'm really sorry if this advice seems superficial, but I am writing it with a true heart. From how you write I already have faith in you that you are already well on the way.

rainy, Wednesday, 10 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Don't take this the wrong way (or do, that's ok too) but I highly recommend physical contact. There's the obvious meaning, but massage is less emotionally complicated and has the same positive physiological effect, or maybe a mild contact sport of some kind - needs to be enjoyable tho.

Keeping busy and having plenty of distractions, even foolish ones, is a certain boon for me - the happier end justifies the crap means or something like that. It keeps you out of the fetal position = it's good. I realize this completely invalidates my answer in Mike's anxiety thread, but that was a bold faced lie. Anxiety sucks royal rocks.

Kim, Wednesday, 10 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Um.. for the record - I am IN NO WAY implying that Tom doesn't get any. It's just an honest suggestion as to what best lifts the mood from personal experience.

Kim, Wednesday, 10 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Have you heard of a book called "The Noonday Demon" by Andrew Solomon? It is kind of an atlas of depression. Well, I think you should read it, I know it has helped me tons just to learn about this stuff. Mr. Solomon himself has had major depression, and he writes about treatments and the experiences of other people dealing with it. One thing he mentions is that every person seems to need a slightly different treatment. Some old lady fought off her (severe) depression by sewing! He is also a big proponent of medication, or anything else that helps people deal with this disease. He said he had to work very hard to overcome his shame about being on medication. In short, it is a very moving and (to me) important book that even has alot to say about what it means to be a human being these days. Required reading, I think.

Ryan A White, Wednesday, 10 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I would also like to add that rainy's reply was awesome. I had a philosophy professor once who said that the intellectual life is the depressed life. But to not lead the intellectual life is to not even be alive. (of course by 'intellectual' he simply means a deep, meaningful life, that is rich in experience.)

Ryan A White, Wednesday, 10 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Happiness is structure. I realize this is useless and stupid advice, but I was a homeschooler and I find structure new and exciting, bear with me. Other things which have gotten me out of past depressions, in addition to drinking and socializing (most of which require considerable amounts of contiguous free time to fully indulge the conscious inertia which usually goes hand in hand with depression, at least for me): video games, the Real World, pool, porn, baseball, exercise (an activity so dismal that it stretches the circumference of my depression to such extremes that I'm obliged to look at my former state of "depression" in a whole new, much more forgiving, light).

Otis Wheeler, Thursday, 11 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

On the other hand going onto anti-depressants again would be a) a defeat and b) would on past experience zombify me and c) seems currently like a severe over-reaction.

Well, you certainly shouldn't think of it as a defeat. I mean, next time you get the flu, is that a defeat? If you don't like the idea of medication, then there is always therapy. Don't be too quick to dismiss it as Oprah mush.

Somethings I do: set a deadline and tell someone about it. I do this with poems, where I will sign myself up for a reading thereby forcing myself to produce something. Also, similar to the vacation idea, I will sometimes just stop writing completely. This comes in handy when I am putting in half-assed efforts and not really doing anything. Its another way to break a negative pattern. You must stop writing in order to start writing, young grasshopper.

bnw, Thursday, 11 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

i agree with the structure thing. i find when i am depressed i need to set a very strict schedule.

anthony, Thursday, 11 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

depression is a theif robbing you of your logic and your libido. I reccomend freinds and lovers.

Mike Hanle y, Thursday, 11 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I would really like to help you. I don't know whether I can but I can give you some of my insights into depression.

The thing that saves me from total debilitating depression is pride. Sometimes I have become so depressed that I can't do anything except lie on the floor and I have gone through long periods of just going through the motions of life without actually participating. I used to go from class to class at school but without speaking or writing or moving except to walk to the next class. The thing that has always got me going again is that I don't want to admit to my family, friends & enemies that the world has defeated me. So, I dig myself up some belligerant pride and get going again. That is the only time that I'm grateful for having so much hate in me.

Here is some of what I think might be true about depression. Depression is grief for your unmet needs (as well as guilt for not having met your own needs). You need to feel your grief and then let it go by allowing it to turn into anger. If the grief is supressed or it is not allowed to evolve into anger, or if the anger is supressed, then depression results. Supressed grief and anger combined with an overactive mind become depression. Grief combined with real sadness becomes despair. Maybe to kick out depression you need to show anger (not resentment - rather the sort of anger that is also found in joy, you know, hypo anger). People feel that they are not allowed to feel/show anger when they have been depressed because depression is sad, flat & down whereas anger is energetic and "up" (as is laughter).

Don't know if that helps any. I think it helped me a bit writing it though!

toraneko, Thursday, 11 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I think that alot of it is chemical and alot of it is family habits and like most mental illness it needs to be treated with a serious combo of drugs therapy and home cures.

anthony, Thursday, 11 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

First, Tom, I have to say that a lot of the comments you've been making in the more serious threads on ILE almost exactly echo mine. It's just that you got to post them first, which is why I've never had a chance to reassure you and say "Hey, I'm with Tom on this one." or "Tom's the bright one, day". Now that you mentioned this little bout of depression, I'm beginning to think we were separated at birth!

Ever since Sunday, I've been in a really "low" way myself. And this coming off a confidence high on Saturday night. I don't know if it was the random immensely painful leg cramp (coupled with hyperventilation and nausea) I had in the middle of Sunday night, or the fact that my attempt to get my mind off the pain by reading CNN.COM put me in a deeper ditch as I found out about the beginning of the attacks.

For the record, I always alternate between being Mr. Happy Confident Stud and Mr. Sad Dejected Milquetoast every month... the peaks and valleys aren't so high enough for me to think I have some sort of bipolar thing going on, as I'm always able to function socially through it all... and I'm sure that's a very common thing with everybody.. but who knows?

Anyway, the first thing I always do when I'm in a low point is to just call my friends and talk about it. I'm sure, Tom, you hardly lack in friends that care about you, and would like to have a nice, intelligent conversation with you. It never really fails to bring me up a little every time. The magic here being that the subject never really sticks to depression when you initiate a phone chat about depression, but the segue out of the topic is smooth and slow enough that you don't notice, and realize that easy relief can exist. Reassurance is a good thing

You didn't mention anything about the current political situation and the anchor that is a harsh sense of mortality that seems to be attached to it, so I wasn't sure if that has anything to do with it. In my current case, it's certainly a part of it. I always feel happy when I know that I'm in control of the decisions that are making me happy; but now we're all in quite a depressing global situation that not a single one of us can really control right now. The lack of security and uncertaintly is extremely unnerving to everybody right now, myself included -- so, Tom, I'm sure you don't need me to tell you that you're not alone.

Hopefully by the time you read this, you'll have kickstarted yourself. (And if not, you're obviously more than welcome to e-mail me personally... )

Brian MacDonald, Thursday, 11 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

A few thoughts: take heart that this depression seems less severe than the earlier episodes, and that you're brave enough/self-assured enough to feel able to discuss it. I was struck that you mentioned the medication option but not counselling. In my experience GPs find it much easier to dispense the former than arrange the later, maybes that option is worth exploring. That you would rather be around people than withdraw socially isn't necessarily a bad sign, perhaps being around other people is what you need right now. I'm with Otis et al on the value of 'structure' (not that I always practise it). I just hope this passes quickly Tom.

stevo, Thursday, 11 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

There's isn't one solution that applies. You just need to find what works best for you. But what is most important is that you find the reason why you feel depressed. You say you are against anti-depressants, but sometimes they might be the solution to the problem. In case the depression is caused by a chemical imbalance. So you could have this checked. So what if taking pills is a defeat, you want to be happy, no?
Some people are more prone to depression than others. Have you tried therapy? It could only be one session. Or more. But it might help to clear your thoughts. You're not alone out there, Tom.
Secondly taking trips abroad or going to the pub are not a long term solution. You might happy for a few hours, but the darkness will come back. The cause andsolution is within yourself.
If you want to talk more, you can always email me.

Helen Fordsdale, Thursday, 11 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Sorry to hear about your depression, Tom.

Not a lot I can add to the generally sound advice above. I think Helen has hit the nail on the head though in that going to the pub or whatever can only be a quick fix. You can work through it.

If you're after a quick fix I'd recommend going to a gym or taking up some sort of exercise. Get those endorphins flowing, safer and cheaper than alcohol and you could look like a musclebound hunk into the bargain (if you don't already).

I don't doubt that the current post WTC climate is acting as a trigger. I know I feel a good deal more uncertain and fearful since 11/09.

Anyway I wish you well and hope you pull through ok.

Billy Dods, Thursday, 11 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

many of my docs have told me exercise is good, but i have never accepted that, and i still have depression, so draw whatever links you want from that, and add sunshine to the list. helpful, from a theoretical headspace is that happiness is a construct that appeared in reasonable timing with the emergence of cpitalism/industrial revolution, the rise of the individual as seperate from extended family - it helps in somuch as you realise that you don't have to be happy to be alright, and you can see moods more as a spectrum - absolute happiness is as absurd as absolute depression. music can help, as can shopping, gentle outings to coffee shops, i'd advise against too much pub time, but that's a personal thing rather than anything else, some gentle relaxation of whatvere type you enjoy, some light cultural stuff - art gallerys and museums are wonderful places for soul soothing, maybe because of the lighting. comedy is good too.

Geoff, Thursday, 11 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Tom, a change of scenery can work wonders, I usually try and spend a few days in the countryside (often the cotswolds) literally walking all day, through little villages maybe having lunch at a nice pub somewhere, one the exercise is good but also you get tired for the right reasons ie exertion rather than stress or whatever and two the air is clean and fresh and you can think with little or no distractions.

Works wonders for me, take care

chris, Thursday, 11 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Don't wallow in it - keep busy. If I can't see friends, one of my coping strategies is to clean every room in the house, re-arrange my CDs and take a toothbrush to the mould around the windows. Going for a run sometimes sorts me out, although I can't keep going for more than five minutes these days. Make lists and do what's on them and put a giant red tick as you complete each task. Also, wanton destruction is good. Go to Oxfam, buy some old crockery and smash them. AAAARRRRRRR!

Hope you feel better soon.

Madchen, Thursday, 11 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I think Chris/Cabbage came up with some good ideas. If you're in the UK, Tom, maybe a quick jaunt to Paris would cheer you up? Its quite cheap and easy on the Eurostar, and Paris is a really good city to just mill around and do nothing in a very mellow, soul-repairing way. Its also quite a good place to get your creativity flowing. Its also quite good to break out of the old routine and just do it on the spur of the moment.

Talking about creativity and ideas - I wouldn't be too worried about 'finishing' things. Some of the best things I've ever read have been half-finished 'scraps' - Rimbaud, Coleridge etc. If you're easy on yourself about 'finishing' things, maybe your anxiety will be replaced with fruitful, relaxed thoughts.

Another thing to cheer you up should be this thread. This has been one of the most, sensitive, enriching and wise threads I've read on ILE. Thank you everybody.

Will McKenzie, Thursday, 11 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I'm with Lucy on the cleaning thing, maybe you could source the fly plague and destroy the buggers.

Pete, Thursday, 11 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

you can play tambourine for the Clientele if you want. It should be pointed out that this also involves serious teaboy duties, however.

Otherwise what everyone else said. And there's a lot to be said for patience. I bet in happier times, when you re-read what you've written now, you'll actually like it a lot.

Alasdair, Thursday, 11 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Have you tried painting?...It's really theraputic and takes your mind off things. The process is more important than the result. I hope my answer doesn't sound too glib.

james, Thursday, 11 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I'd suggest stopping reading the essays of Montaigne. Instead try Dods Parliamentary Companion 2001: I found out all about CRAVATOLOGY from that and it's now going on my CV under hobbies and interests.

Apart from that I can't suggest anything cos I'm a whinging old bint. Of course, you could get Final Fantasy 8 for the PlayStation but then face falling further into depression when you get stuck on the most mundane part of the game EVER, that DAMN WORLD MAP. Where the hell is the White SeeD ship?!

But at least it provokes you to feel something, albiet intense irritation.

I'll help out with the "being down the pub" situation though - unless it was last night in which case I was so tired I got home and fell asleep and AGANE forgot to my laundry. Actually, doing laundry helps. Maybe you should come over and do mine cos quite frankly I can't be arsed. It sits in my room and glares at me. IT IS NOT BETTER THAN ME!

Sarah, Thursday, 11 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I found making a massive change in my life, and then having to deal with something potentially life-changing (or life-threatening) has made me completely forget being depressed for a while. I wouldn't worry, Tom. I've had some terrible run-ins with the demon depression over the years, to the point that I've been barely recognisable. It's perfectly normal and you *will* recover.

Paul Strange, Thursday, 11 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

That White SeeD ship is really easy to find, by the way! I can't believe you're stuck there!!! :)

Paul Strange, Thursday, 11 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

GRRRRRRRR! Maybe I have very selective COLOUR BLINDNESS and can't find the damn thing. It took me ages to find Edeas house too. I used to think the "black dog" was my nemesis but NO, it's the "world map" of life. THINK OF IT! World map = meaningless, slow moving purgatory. Soundtracked by a marimba.

And some of us don't have special Wolf Sense to help us find things either, Wolverine!!!

Tom, I'd also like to say that when you do write, it's damn good. And don't believe I'd say that to anyone who'd complain - you've just written something very good (and purposeful!), I believe...

Sarah, Thursday, 11 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Over the last year I was on anti-depressants for about 10 months, trying to clear up a long running depression (why 10 months? I thought it had got better, but then it got worse...). I found they really worked, but in combination with going to see a therapist. Even if you can't/don't want to do this, just try talking to people about this, get stuff out in the open so it isn't spiralling around in your head worsening your condition. I found talking to people let me think about things in a much more objective manner enabling me to sort my problems out. (They, of course, must be willing to talk to you about it - I had a friend who refused to admit I was depressed at all who I'm not sure if I'm friends with at all now. Also, try not to wear people down as I'm sure I managed to do this at times.) You have to continually think that things can and will get better so don't just expect a quick fix. (Well, that's what I found anyway, it was a slow process but one that was ultimately worthwhile.) So, I hope this helps in some way, but if it's not your thing, it's not your thing.

Bill, Thursday, 11 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

OK, thanks first of all to all of you for replying. As predicted I feel better for getting it off my chest and I feel better this morning anyway. And thanks to everyone for suggestions even if I don't specifically mention you now, and for the offers of e-mail support.

Rainy you seem very wise. I like the idea of depression as a non- negative - in fact that's what led me to wanting to write my way through it in the first place.

Otis I think is also right - living alone has de-structured me in that it's allowed my lazy side to come out. Allied to that is a very free and unmanaged working environment. I need to beat laziness before I can deal with the depression properly, I think.

Therapy - I did try therapy on one occasion to see what it was like. It worked for a while but I also felt uncomfortable with it. If NHS- recommended therapists were as clever as the people on ILE I would jump at it. I might give it a go again though anyway.

The global situation is actually as much a help as a hindrance - forcing myself to think rationally about something, even something I can do nothing about, is a Good Thing. 9/11 was a trigger for this bout of depression, certainly, but on the other hand I have at various points convinced myself that I was going to die of nuclear war, ebola, being buried alive and vCJD, so anthrax and terrorist onslaughts are just another couple of morbid little demons on a long list.

Cleaning and exercise - yes. But this is what I mean by laziness - how to actually start on the cleaning or the exercise, how to find the willpower. It's the 'blank page' thing. BTW if anyone knows some good insect-killers apart from cockfarming Raid which the flies larff at could they let me know.

Anyway thanks again, very much. Good old ILE: I'm glad you exist.

Tom, Thursday, 11 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Tom, its 11/9 not 9/11. If we all start writing our dates in an American counter-intuative way the the terrorists and their elephants have won.

Pete, Thursday, 11 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I am keen on it being called "9/11" by everyone ever because it means that Public Enemy's most overrated song will never again be playable for sensitivity reasons.

Tom, Thursday, 11 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Maybe too late to contribute but I wanted to add: that you recognised the difference between this lowness and the more serious one in 1997 means you WILL be ok, I promise.

My suggestion would be to make something or try out an artform you don't normally do, such as: (assuming these aren't already hobbies) spend a day photographing, maybe develop them yourself. Do a painting or sculpture. Buy some glass paint and cheap glasses and paint them. Build a bit of furniture. Write a song. Something like that.

chris, Thursday, 11 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Chris - this is an excellent idea (and no it is not too late to contribute!). Isabel paints in pastel as a hobby so I may well nick hers tonight and get to work.

Tom, Thursday, 11 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

lunchtime run did it for me. i was much more active as a kid (kid=under 21) and have made light of the idea of doing exercise in the last few years. then early this year (while still on anti- depressants!) I started to go running at lunchtime. nothing ambitious -- i still only go once or twice a week for 25-40 mins -- but it's done me a power of good.

Alan Trewartha, Thursday, 11 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

what chris tollemache-tollemache duckyfuzz said, only make the new artform CULINARY: eg teach self to cook (or to expand cookery skillsz if you already can) (eg baking if you can already boil etc) and here's why. Cycle of project satisfaction = real-time, a matter of hours, and not up for public discussion (foodwise, you like what you like what you like). It is above all a pampering of YOU which is nevertheless minimally essential and thus guilt-lite in its expansion (it can also if you like be expanded to all and sundry, but no one much will object if not), and the achievements nay triumphs are palpable and accessible and immediate. MY CAKE IS FAB, you say to yourself. (Cycle of project satisfaction for eg writing, art etc = longer, long enuff that you can tumble thru many difficult moods between start and end, and then failing to end adds to depression etc, however NO ONE EVER ABANDONED AN EGG *AS IT FRIED* BECAUSE OF A DEPRESSIVE ATTACK. You started so you'll finish.)

It is a learning which does not end. And leads I think to invaluable critical insights in re other more dispensible artforms. Also it gives you social access to ppl at work and in life with whom before you felt you had nothing in common with "intellectually" (I talk a lot with my mum abt all kinds, but this is the only Art-Creative element we actually back-and-forth on).

(Also you have a garden, but that may strike you as TOO TOO middle-aged. But wickle green shoots as yr dear darling babies are surprisingly potent, to take you out of your Big Wide Grey Gloomy Self...)

mark s, Thursday, 11 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Ooh, that's a nice idea! Now is the time to plant daffodils, Tom.

Madchen, Thursday, 11 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Sorry to hear that you're feeling low, Tom. Some good advice here, I think. One thing I would reinforce is the idea of structure and staying busy. My personal experience has shown that when I struggle to find the time to write because I'm otherwise occupied, I cherish the writing experience more & the writing is better. When I have nothing but time, I churn out shit & don't enjoy the process. Not that writing is the solution to your gloomy outlook, but making something worthwhile always helps to bolster my mood.

I believe more in therapy than drugs (tho I know the tandem is how it's often done). I've seen three different ones at various stages in my life, but only one was worthwhile. Don't be afraid to shop around like you would for any service.

Mark, Thursday, 11 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I can offer little since by default I'm an optimist and generally positive. But the point is, we're always around if ya need advice or just a friendly ear. :-)

Ned Raggett, Thursday, 11 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I think the number of replies to this thread is comforting. It's reassuring to me to think that when I lie on the bed for 2 hours just wanting the day to end and to go back to sleep, I'm not a freak.

I agree that if you are mildly depressed, you need to embrace it, accept it. As long as it's not keeping you from working and playing then it's not too big of a problem. It's just a daily battle w/ yourself to get the motivation to get up and take a shower, find the willpower to actually eat something, do something more than watch TV. (Mild depression for me results in lethargy, can you tell?) It's normal.

What's not normal is to cry multiple times a day, not eat anything all day, sleep through the day or not sleep at all, be afraid of going outside and talking to people, or think about dying all day long.

As long as I make that distinction I know that I am doing pretty good. If you know you're headed to the land of serious depression, then you should never feel bad about seeking medical help, or burdening your friends. :)

marianna, Thursday, 11 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

One thing that worked well for me was St. John's Wort. It's an herbal supplement with allegedly antidepressant properties. I don't know if it was just the placebo I needed or if it actually works biochemically (studies claiming Science Proof are out there, but I don't necessarily buy any of it), but it seemed to smooth things out a bit for me (with no zombification side effects). You can take it in a capsule or in a tea. It's a bit hippyish, but certainly less scary than prozac and its ilk.

And, as others have mentioned, cleaning house is great too. Reorganizing the music collection is a good trick - lets you wallow in old favourites while feeling productive and organized.

fritz, Thursday, 11 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Rainy is choice

Actually rainy made me better when i was sick so her advice has been tested. but maybe it was just her, i don't know

maryann, Thursday, 11 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Hello from Distant Japan, where i am, man.

It's nice to see that ILE is no different from anywhere else when it comes to This Sort Of Thing: "Depressed? SEX and BEER!" Hoorah! These are all obviously true, especially the bit about not being hard on yrself, etc etc.

BUT: Practical Long Term Advice! I used to get like this all the time, until i (DAN DAN DA!) spent a week meditating. No, really, i didn. Sat down quietly a spent most of the week thinking through everything about ME, drank some TEA, faced up to all self-issues with BLISTERING HONESTY, and at the end of it i found i had settled these issues, thrown out an AWFUL lot of EGO, and have never looked back. Now i have inner peace, a happy outlook on life (as, compared to the alternative, life is GRATE), and an VAST appetite for the two vital cheer-me- ups mentioned elsewhere.

The fact i also have a faint whiff of patchouli to my soul and a worrying tolerance for the sitar is a small price to pay. It might be a bit (er... OK, a LOT) HIPPY, but it works baby! Tho if you do it, might be best to face the inner self of YOU and not ME. But you never know.

Mmm... where did i put my KAFTAN?

MJ Hibbett, Thursday, 11 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

five years pass...

ok, I have a week to decide if I want to register for school this semester. I've only got the time/money to take one class (probably geology, to finally start getting my science credits out of the way) at night, and work may be taking me out of town off and on starting in October/November.

My dilemma is thus: do I keep going one class at a time, making no real progress, or do I take at least a full year off, probably pay off all of my debts and try to figure out what I'm doing before going back full time?

My problem is that I have no real endgame for a degree. I have a wide variety of interests and very little in the way of specialized skills.

Or I could say fuck it, lose twenty pounds and join the Air Force.

milo z, Monday, 20 August 2007 04:44 (seventeen years ago)

Could you take the course externally?

W4LTER, Monday, 20 August 2007 04:49 (seventeen years ago)

No, sadly, all the science classes require on-campus lab work.

milo z, Monday, 20 August 2007 04:52 (seventeen years ago)

As someone who has blown a fuckload on directionless education, take the break.

bnw, Monday, 20 August 2007 05:01 (seventeen years ago)

directionless education has this for it- it does impress employers into giving you jobs that suck a little less than minimum wage work while you try to work out what you want to do with your life.

darraghmac, Monday, 20 August 2007 11:47 (seventeen years ago)

how much study have you already done? if you've already been at it for awhile then take a break and go back refreshed. i took 7yrs off, and i totally regret ever trying to go straight from high school to uni. but if you've been slogging away part time for ages, then maybe you should just go for it and get it ove and done with.

there seems to be a lot of jobs out there that don't really care what degree you've got, as long as you've got one.

Rubyredd, Monday, 20 August 2007 11:53 (seventeen years ago)

If only we could do a quick test to check whether the depression/feeling low comes from a chemical balance or not. I sometimes wish I could find out. It isn't so much that I have a constant feeling of lowness (?) but I would prefer to get *rid of it*, especially my anxiety. Then again I feel a bit silly and selfish for having done therapy: I feel as though my mental state is probably relatively *okay*.

nathalie, Monday, 20 August 2007 12:11 (seventeen years ago)

i think going for it, is best, it gives the feeling of progress also, actually getting somewhere etc

Filey Camp, Monday, 20 August 2007 12:14 (seventeen years ago)

I have about sixty hours total over six years with breaks here and there - basically a minor in fine arts, with starts into either English or history as a major and all of my non-math/science reqs taken care of.

I'm leaning toward taking a real break and then starting up when I can go full time (for the first time). One or two classes/semester leaves me feeling like I'm spinning my wheels.

milo z, Monday, 20 August 2007 19:38 (seventeen years ago)

On the one hand, whenever I've taken a semester off I start out like, "Oh yeah, time off, gonna get all this shit done, X and Y and Z." And then, inevitably, I don't. After figuring out how to avoid this disappointment (don't tell myself I am going to make 5 paintings when my average rate of progress is one a year), I realized an excellent way to make myself motivated FOR a full semester of classes was to do no school, no personal projects at all, just work. Working at whatever shit job I can get without a degree, just setting my goal on making catch-up money, really makes me think, "Jesus F. I certainly do not want to do this for the rest of my life." After 5 months of this I am ripe & ready to tackle 15+ credits.

Abbott, Monday, 20 August 2007 20:54 (seventeen years ago)

Also I do think it is best to take time off & figure out what you want to accomplish, maybe read up or volunteer in the various fields of your interest. This way you are not just throwing money at classes that may or may not be worthwhile while hoping something comes along & clicks.

Abbott, Monday, 20 August 2007 20:56 (seventeen years ago)


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