Take this job and shove it: glorious ways of quitting your job

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Have you ever told your boss to fuck off on your way out the door? Or do you just stop showing up.

Mitigating factors: keeping vacation time/sick leave (i.e. calling in sick for three weeks while you start your new job so you can double dip), year end bonus, etc.

― don weiner, Saturday, 20 December 2003 19:58 (twenty-one years ago)

I had a friend who, not long ago, at the age of 41 (mid level management), got drunk at the office holiday party and told the boss to fuck themselves. Classic.

― don weiner, Saturday, 20 December 2003 19:59 (twenty-one years ago)

Steal everything and sell it on ebay.

― @d@ml (nordicskilla), Saturday, 20 December 2003 20:00 (twenty-one years ago)

this idiot (still my friend, natch) loss approx $6K USD for that stunt. No, he can't "afford" it.

― don weiner, Saturday, 20 December 2003 20:00 (twenty-one years ago)

@d@m OTM although this is better when you get laid off. Not that I would know.

I always wanted to just go get another job and not tell them I've quit and see how long it takes for HR to figure it out. I'm guessing most places you'd get by with at least one extra paycheck, although there was one guy who worked at one of my former jobs who hadn't shown up for SIX MONTHS and they were still paying him! They just didn't feel like going through the paperwork to fire him. This obviously speaks more about the bad management than anything else.

― anthony kyle monday (akmonday), Saturday, 20 December 2003 20:07 (twenty-one years ago)

four months pass...

I am quitting today. Nobody knows yet. I also don't really need a reference from this place and I hate it. Shall I go nuts?

― @d@ml (nordicskilla), Thursday, 22 April 2004 15:48 (twenty-one years ago)

pour beer on them!

― mark p (Mark P), Thursday, 22 April 2004 15:51 (twenty-one years ago)

sorry. i shouldn't typecast.

― mark p (Mark P), Thursday, 22 April 2004 15:51 (twenty-one years ago)

Go bananas.

― Michael White (Hereward), Thursday, 22 April 2004 15:52 (twenty-one years ago)

Are you suggesting that my only talent is pouring beer on things? What do you think I am???

― @d@ml (nordicskilla), Thursday, 22 April 2004 15:52 (twenty-one years ago)

You could always just walk out and say nothing.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 22 April 2004 15:53 (twenty-one years ago)

here for our amusement?

(xpost)

― mark p (Mark P), Thursday, 22 April 2004 15:53 (twenty-one years ago)

Ned, that's so elegant.

― Michael White (Hereward), Thursday, 22 April 2004 15:54 (twenty-one years ago)

Yeah, but I AM probably gonna be all nice about it. My contract is actually "at will" so there is no necessary notice period as such.

― @d@ml (nordicskilla), Thursday, 22 April 2004 15:54 (twenty-one years ago)

give you boss a red-eye.

― Chris 'The Velvet Bingo' V (Chris V), Thursday, 22 April 2004 15:55 (twenty-one years ago)

do you feel that you were treated shabbily?

― mark p (Mark P), Thursday, 22 April 2004 15:55 (twenty-one years ago)

You could always just walk out and say nothing.
....with your pants round your ankles.

― dysoned (dyson), Thursday, 22 April 2004 15:56 (twenty-one years ago)

Yeah, squat on the bosses desk and curl off a Chocolate Mr Whippy. Wipe your ass on his tie.

― Rumpy Pumpkin (rumpypumpkin), Thursday, 22 April 2004 15:57 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.davegibbonsfansite.com/greenl181.jpg

― The Huckle-Buck (Horace Mann), Thursday, 22 April 2004 15:58 (twenty-one years ago)

pour beer on them!

Pour beer in you. Sing. Dance. Leave.

― Michael White (Hereward), Thursday, 22 April 2004 15:58 (twenty-one years ago)

My boss doesn't wear a tie.

The problem is that the people I immediately work with (including my supervisor) are nice, but the management here (for those of you that don't know) are evil fucks.

― @d@ml (nordicskilla), Thursday, 22 April 2004 15:59 (twenty-one years ago)

see?

― @d@ml (nordicskilla), Thursday, 22 April 2004 15:59 (twenty-one years ago)

Wow, it is actually quite hard to quit! I am just sitting here waiting for the right moment...

― @d@ml (nordicskilla), Thursday, 22 April 2004 16:00 (twenty-one years ago)

...and I have done this countless times before now.

― @d@ml (nordicskilla), Thursday, 22 April 2004 16:01 (twenty-one years ago)

at my last job things had become pretty bad over the span of about a year.
one day i came in and they'd moved my desk the next room over.
so i quit.
just walked out over a simple relocation of my work area.
it was super.

― dyson (dyson), Thursday, 22 April 2004 16:01 (twenty-one years ago)

Maybe best just to sneak out then. Best done at lunchtime as it leaves them in no doubt that you don't intend to come back.

― Rumpy Pumpkin (rumpypumpkin), Thursday, 22 April 2004 16:04 (twenty-one years ago)

i rather nice about it tho.

i think you should come up with an ironic way of quitting that would drive home your objection to the way the school has been conducting itself of late.

alas, i am not smart enough to think of one tho. sorry.

― dyson (dyson), Thursday, 22 April 2004 16:04 (twenty-one years ago)

I'd just leave mysteriously. Keep 'em guessing, heh.

― Pashmina (Pashmina), Thursday, 22 April 2004 16:07 (twenty-one years ago)

Make it political. Write (and cc to local paper/website of choice) formal letter of resignation in protest over policies, etc... Very worst is sypathetic bartender will buy 'hero' drinks.

― Michael White (Hereward), Thursday, 22 April 2004 16:08 (twenty-one years ago)

Ooh yeah! A public letter of resignation! That's a fabby idea! I might just do that. When I don't want my job.

― Rumpy Pumpkin (rumpypumpkin), Thursday, 22 April 2004 16:10 (twenty-one years ago)

The drama of this thread is k-exciting! I think you should be nice, life is very long and you never know if/when you're going to run across somebody in a new context which will make you either cherish or regret the memory of how you left this or that meaningless job.

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Thursday, 22 April 2004 16:10 (twenty-one years ago)

That said, if making a scene is what appeals, I go with Rumpy Pumpkin: you can't beat the chocolate Mr Whippie

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Thursday, 22 April 2004 16:11 (twenty-one years ago)

Defecate onto a big poster board and smear various shit graffiti all over it, saying things like "Smash The School", or quote the lyrics from Crass's "Asylum", then hang it up in the executive offices.

Or not.

― donut bitch (donut), Thursday, 22 April 2004 16:12 (twenty-one years ago)

I can't believe nobody's suggested fire yet.

I say secretly set fire to your desk, declare "I can't work under these conditions" and "this is one fire too many at my desk" and then walk out in a huff.

― martin m. (mushrush), Thursday, 22 April 2004 16:17 (twenty-one years ago)

Start a riot! Yay!

Or else, go with teh public letter thing. The press love the "disgruntled employee" angle.

― Johnney B (Johnney B), Thursday, 22 April 2004 16:19 (twenty-one years ago)

Write a story for a workshop fantasizing about killing your managers. Include video footage of you fingering...well, anyway.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 22 April 2004 16:19 (twenty-one years ago)

1/2 of this stuff would get @d@ml arrested!!

― Pashmina (Pashmina), Thursday, 22 April 2004 16:23 (twenty-one years ago)

You trying to confess here Ned?

― Rumpy Pumpkin (rumpypumpkin), Thursday, 22 April 2004 16:24 (twenty-one years ago)

Does the "disgruntled employee" angle work so well when said employee is not actually leaving in direct objection to the management's repressive policies, but in fact to receive a much fatter pay packet at a far more desirable position elsewhere?

John D OTM of course.

Though do I love the suggestions for "artistic" ways of handing in your notice.

― @d@ml (nordicskilla), Thursday, 22 April 2004 16:25 (twenty-one years ago)

I quit a job because I wanted to go and see Jacques Lu Cont play.

It was a laugh, I asked for the day off and they said no. So I gave my weeks notice and then phoned in sick for 3 days. Then I just didn't bother turning up and when they rang my phone, the day after Lu Cont, for my final day of work there, I told the manager I'd be about an hour late, haha and went back to sleep and didn't go.

It was awkward ever having to use that shop again but the staff turnover is high enough that nobody I worked with works there anymore. The manager also rang me by accident three weeks later, that was embarassing.

― Ronan (Ronan), Thursday, 22 April 2004 16:25 (twenty-one years ago)

Of course the angle works, so long as you don't mention it. What they don't know won't hurt you 'n' all.

― Johnney B (Johnney B), Thursday, 22 April 2004 16:26 (twenty-one years ago)

(a guy who worked there previously made a series of deli-price tags to hand in his notice, like "I hate this job-1.99", "I am moving to Australia-300.", "with my girlfriend-50", "I went fucking mad here before". He stuck them all over the orders book and handed it in. I'd say he was great. I hope he's happy. )

― Ronan (Ronan), Thursday, 22 April 2004 16:27 (twenty-one years ago)

I am in fact trying to avoid the "drama" aspect of this if at all possible. It's just so quiet right now, though - the three of us (inc supervisor) sat in a vast empty room, I feel like I can't suddenly get up and scream "I QUIT!" or even say "Andrei, can I have a quiet word?" because it IS so quiet!

― @d@ml (nordicskilla), Thursday, 22 April 2004 16:27 (twenty-one years ago)

Act it out in mime.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 22 April 2004 16:27 (twenty-one years ago)

Burst out into a swing choir rendition of "Take This Job And Shove It". You'll have to do some imprompty choreography and find dancers really quickly.

― donut bitch (donut), Thursday, 22 April 2004 16:30 (twenty-one years ago)

There was an article (with hilarious accompanying pictures) in the Sunday Mail last week about some guy who worked as a draughtsman for a Royal Doulton-esque china producing factory. He was being laid off so he incorporated little pictures of a couple shagging in the bushes to a series of cups and saucers. These weren't noticed till years later and are now worth mega bucks. What a guy.

― Rumpy Pumpkin (rumpypumpkin), Thursday, 22 April 2004 16:31 (twenty-one years ago)

I am currently working on an expressionist painting that will fully convey my reasons for leaving. This is in fact the first time I have worked with barbecue sauce, so the strokes could be a little more confident.

― @d@ml (nordicskilla), Thursday, 22 April 2004 16:31 (twenty-one years ago)

Go with the mime act. You may not even have to quit. They may ask you to leave.

Barbeque sauce is a difficult but fulfilling medium.

― Michael White (Hereward), Thursday, 22 April 2004 16:34 (twenty-one years ago)

*ponders whether a Strokes joke is worth it, concludes it isn't*

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 22 April 2004 16:34 (twenty-one years ago)

you know.. ronan, jobs just don't grow on trees.

― mandee, Thursday, 22 April 2004 16:35 (twenty-one years ago)

take the high road @d@ml!

― gygax! (gygax!), Thursday, 22 April 2004 16:38 (twenty-one years ago)

Why do you think Nordic wants to go to Scotland?

― Michael White (Hereward), Thursday, 22 April 2004 16:40 (twenty-one years ago)

Believe me this job grew in a sewer.

― Ronan (Ronan), Thursday, 22 April 2004 16:44 (twenty-one years ago)

Hence the absence of trees.

― Michael White (Hereward), Thursday, 22 April 2004 16:52 (twenty-one years ago)

Isn't he Scottish? He has an exotic accent.

― gygax! (gygax!), Thursday, 22 April 2004 16:54 (twenty-one years ago)

Mandee were you serious?

I'm not meant to feel guilty on ILX!

― Ronan (Ronan), Thursday, 22 April 2004 16:58 (twenty-one years ago)

God, this is ridiculous. Supervisor has gone to lunch now.

― @d@ml (nordicskilla), Thursday, 22 April 2004 19:40 (twenty-one years ago)

Email that went round the company a month or so ago:

"Dear everybody,

Thank you for making my six months at Fr33man so enjoyable, I really liked working with you all. Well, except Philip, his work was inconsequential and degrading. Just a joke, it was all inconsequential and degrading. Every minute of it.

Still, I feel I should give something back to a wonderful group of people who have given so much to me. Therefore there are four uneaten crumpets and half a tub of Clover in the fridge, please divide equally amongst yourselves.

Bye,

Gareth.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Thursday, 22 April 2004 19:51 (twenty-one years ago)

nice.

― @d@ml (nordicskilla), Thursday, 22 April 2004 19:52 (twenty-one years ago)

when i quit one job i just wrote "dear XXXX, i quit, love jess" in foot high letters in magic marker on the wall and walked out

― strongo hulkington (dubplatestyle), Thursday, 22 April 2004 19:59 (twenty-one years ago)

I was waiting for my luggage at the airport in Providence a few years ago when a man came on the intercom and announced, "Ladies and gentlemen, please excuse the interruption. I'd just like to let you know that today will be my last day working at beautiful T. F. Green airport. For the record, XXXX is an insufferable bitch and I hope she dies a painful death of dyssentery." (or something very very close.)

― the krza (krza), Thursday, 22 April 2004 20:13 (twenty-one years ago)

When I was music director at a radio station, I discovered my boss was involved in a little payola. I called him on it, resulting in a big argument. I told him he could shove the radio station up his fat ass and walked out.

― BanjoMania (Brilhante), Thursday, 22 April 2004 20:15 (twenty-one years ago)

1. Say uncomplimentary things about your editor on an ILM thread.
2. Have said editor read said thread, then ring me up indignantly and try it, threatening me with the sack.
3. Respond to editor, call his bluff, tell him that if I have to choose between Ucunt and ILx I'll choose ILx every time, resign and tell him that life's much better at Time Out.

― Marcello Carlin, Friday, 23 April 2004 07:44 (twenty-one years ago)

Oh, I quit, by the way. It was easy.

― @d@ml (nordicskilla), Friday, 23 April 2004 10:53 (twenty-one years ago)

It was supposed to be easy Adam.

― Ronan (Ronan), Friday, 23 April 2004 10:54 (twenty-one years ago)

Yes, I know.

― @d@ml (nordicskilla), Friday, 23 April 2004 10:58 (twenty-one years ago)

congrats adam!

― teeny (teeny), Friday, 23 April 2004 11:14 (twenty-one years ago)

Thank you. I start my extremely sexxy new job in two weeks. Here is a movie (and book, obv) that is apparently about what I will be doing:

http://www.wbcn.com/wbcn_com_events_files/movie%20files/runaway_jury.jpg

― @d@ml (nordicskilla), Friday, 23 April 2004 11:20 (twenty-one years ago)

That's me on the right.

― @d@ml (nordicskilla), Friday, 23 April 2004 11:21 (twenty-one years ago)

However, being at work for two weeks while everyone knows you are leaving appears to suck.

― @d@ml (nordicskilla), Friday, 23 April 2004 14:07 (twenty-one years ago)

I thought your dream job was going to be shepherding Chiklis around.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 23 April 2004 14:11 (twenty-one years ago)

It is!

― @d@ml (nordicskilla), Friday, 23 April 2004 14:13 (twenty-one years ago)

If by "shepherding around" you mean "snuggling".

― @d@ml (nordicskilla), Friday, 23 April 2004 14:13 (twenty-one years ago)

Hang on Adam, I've lost track. Is this a third new job that isn't the shitty camera tech one or the soulcrushing boring office one?

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Friday, 23 April 2004 14:14 (twenty-one years ago)

Yes. It is a third one. Free of shittiness and soul crushing.

― @d@ml (nordicskilla), Friday, 23 April 2004 14:17 (twenty-one years ago)

Congrats.

― Michael White (Hereward), Friday, 23 April 2004 14:44 (twenty-one years ago)

I worked in a comic book shop.One day the postman handed me the mail and said,"Have a nice day." I realized that that wasn't going to happen as long as I worked there, so I followed him out the door. And in his jingle, jangle morning...

― Speedy (Speedy Gonzalas), Friday, 23 April 2004 17:56 (twenty-one years ago)

two years pass...

After completing my masters and lining up work in my field, I was ready to quit my soul-squasher of more than three years. I wrote a tasteful, warm "here's my resignation" letter. Here is what I got in return:

[my name]:

You are truly reaching a milestone by achieving your educational goal.
You should be very proud of your accomplishment.

My best to you in all your future endeavors.
Thanks for the last 3 years.

[manager name]

Four declarative sentences that a robot could have written. I am not at all sorry that I'm leaving.

Sayonara, wieners!

― The Milkmaid (82375538-A) (The Milkmaid), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 14:53 (nineteen years ago)

Not to mention that THREE is to be written as a word, not a number, as with all numbers under 10 that appear in text. What a tool.

― suzy (suzy), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 15:00 (nineteen years ago)

This is a person who has not typed out the word "people" or "please" or "thanks" as long as I've known her.

― The Milkmaid (82375538-A) (The Milkmaid), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 15:01 (nineteen years ago)

oh you are a 1 (xpost)

― Konal Doddz (blueski), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 15:02 (nineteen years ago)

I once went to get a breakfast taco and never came back.

― 100% CHAMPS with a Yes! Attitude. (Austin, Still), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 15:02 (nineteen years ago)

I have told my bosses/parents numerous times that I quit. Only to come back the next day and pretend nothing had happened.

― Nathalie (stevie nixed), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 15:05 (nineteen years ago)

http://static.flickr.com/17/20989140_74bf5c2359_m.jpg

― Miss Misery xox (MissMiseryTX), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 15:09 (nineteen years ago)

Not to mention that THREE is to be written as a word, not a number, as with all numbers under 10 that appear in text. What a tool.

I wouldn't really expect anyone outside of publishing to follow this rule in a personal e-mail, though.

― jaymc (jaymc), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 15:13 (nineteen years ago)

"Sayonara, wieners!"
Was this your "tasteful, warm" resignation letter?

― Thermo Thinwall (Thermo Thinwall), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 15:16 (nineteen years ago)

No, of course not, but if they see this, I guess it will be an appendix.

― The Milkmaid (82375538-A) (The Milkmaid), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 15:19 (nineteen years ago)

what happened to @d@m and his new job?

just out of interest.

― pisces (piscesx), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 15:33 (nineteen years ago)

five years pass...

just gave my 2 weeks

― Gatsby was a success, in the end, wasn't he? (D-40), Friday, 22 July 2011 20:13 (fourteen years ago)

TWO WEEKS

what's yr next move?

― PAJAMARALLS? PAJAMALWAYS! (DJP), Friday, 22 July 2011 20:25 (fourteen years ago)

freelancing / djing pretty much

im moving in with the gf

― Gatsby was a success, in the end, wasn't he? (D-40), Saturday, 23 July 2011 01:06 (fourteen years ago)

seven years pass...

https://www.chicagotribune.com/business/ct-biz-walmart-video-teen-quitting-intercom-20181213-story.html

Racicot's voice boomed through the loudspeakers as he claimed the store's management didn't care about the employees. He alleged that his boss, an assistant manager, called him a "waste of time." He further accused the store of cutting employee benefits to save money.

"I've been a loyal employee here for over a year and a half, and I'm sick of all the bulls---, bogus write-ups, and my job," he said. He ended his rant using expletives to curse management, his job and Walmart as a whole.

At least one person is heard cheering in the background after he slammed down the phone.

― j., Sunday, 16 December 2018 18:21 (six years ago)

a year and a half ffs

― gabbnebulous (darraghmac), Sunday, 16 December 2018 18:32 (six years ago)

an eternity in a teenager's life

― A is for (Aimless), Sunday, 16 December 2018 20:27 (six years ago)

that's like exponential-scale loyalty

― j., Sunday, 16 December 2018 20:57 (six years ago)

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