Taking sides: Superman vs. Batman

'Who knows, Robin? This strange mixing of minds may be the greatest single service ever performed for humanity! Let's go, but, inconspicuously,through this window. We'll use our batropes. Our Job is finished'

They threw one cigarette overboard and made the boat a cigarette lighter!

Both reached their pinnacle in _Dark Knight Returns_, of course.

yes, and lest we forget, batman was on the verge of KICKING HIS ASS. as it should be.

I have since had the doctors in and I'm alright now.

sf author, right? i wanna say ballard, but i know that's not right. damn, on the tip of my fingers...

Superman = more effective superhero, as scientifically proved by Superfriends -- at the beginning of every episode, Superman had to be incapacitated in some way in order for the Legion of Doom's plan to even get off the ground. The rest of the Superfriends would then spent 20 minutes rescuing Superman so he could go take care of the problem.

Superman sucks, dude. I mean, yeah, he's all about throwing around planets and leaping the Empire State Building in a single bound and shit, which is pretty damn good, plus he can fly. But he wears the ugliest clothing imaginable, even worse than Captain America. Plus, the whole kryptonite thing is a bit weak and bizarre. His nemesis sucks, too. But the main reason why Superman sucks is the whole Clark Kent thing. I mean, all he does is take off his damned glasses and everyone's completely confused as to who he is. I know that if I took off my glasses, everyone would be like, oh, Ally's not wearing glasses, not, oh, where did Ally go? So what the fuck is that bullshit? Couldn't they have come up with a more plausible thing? I mean, Batman wears a mask.

Batman wins cos of Catwoman, you know. We should really have a discussion, Catwoman v. Lois Lane, cos everyone knows Lois Lane is ass.

I mean, honestly, Spiderman is basically the sort of superhero designed for indie peeps. And I can't abide by indie peep superheroes. I mean, he's all weak and shit, he's just clever so he can outsmart people. Plus that whole climbing walls thing. Regardless, Batman is also extremely clever and would easily crush Spiderman with just a negative glance in his direction. Batman is Jay-Z to Spiderman's Jurassic 5, yo. Clever is great, and I do like Spiderman well enough (his outfit would be better if it wasn't the same color as Superman's though), but clever ain't got nothing on, say, Hulk Strength. I mean, that's what you gotta watch out for, crazy insane Hulk Strength type things. The villians are all supersmart too, but they always lose in the end cos they just ain't got that extra superduper strength/cool car/sidekicks.

I still stand by my statement that the reason why Batman whoops everyone's booty is because he has the cooler periphial people. I mean, the much mentioned by me Catwoman is easily way cooler than any other comic book chick, even proper comic superheroines like Wonder Woman (though hot pants are pretty cool to fight evil in) or Sailor Moon*. Robin is great cos he just sits around and does jack shit but follow around Batman all day, like Batman needs some little weak kid following him everywhere. And he's got a butler! I mean, that's fantastic. And the villians all kick it, at least the main ones like the Penguin and the Joker and the Riddler and so on. I'm not so sure about Poison Ivy, I mean she's got the hair but honestly, what is her deal? Other than that, his villians are fantastic and there are so many of them, it's like a corporation of villains.

Plus Gotham City is the most kickass place ever created. I mean, they're always in the dark, everyone is ludicrious stupid rich (except the poor people), and the entire justice system seems to be based on, "Well, um, we can call Batman I guess". And they're always so surprised when bad shit goes down, like that never happens in Gotham City.

Also, the movies are the best out of all of the comic book movies, at least the Tim Burton ones. I mean, X-Men is pretty good, except for when that guy melts, that's sick. But it's not Batman. And don't get me started on how much I hate those Superman movies, that music!

* The Dirty Pair got some kicking threads though, I need their outfits, they got better overall fashion sense than Catwoman. I'd still take Catwoman's outfit though.

The thing that annoys me about the Batman movies, was that Billy Dee Williams character 'Harvet Dent' should have become Two-Face in Batman Forever. I hate it when movies don't pay enough respect to the original comic book.

Spidey is indie, I suppose. Skinny, science-nerdy, wracked with self- doubt, super power of "sense" = sensitive guy (Anthony Michael Hall). Clearly then, Superman is a Jock (Emilio Estevez) and Batman is a Goth (Ally Sheedy?).

We have come full circle on ILE.

Freedom = HAVING a butler, yes. I mean, come on. He probably even puts Batman's pants on for him.

Superman looks like Dick Tracy anyhow, what is that?

1.superman's invulnerability
2:spider-man's "every-day joe" quality
3:batman's creepy goth nature
4.the hulks RAGE!(tm)
5.wolverine's healing factor and totally anger
6:gambit's (my personal favorite hero) suave
7:that awesome costume
8:the fact that he was made by a creator who was already a legend.
9:comics and hell have a close relationship and since my Christian religion is all about redemption and forgivness i like there being a hero who is trying to escape and redeem his sins.
10.he had an adult animated series.

I think Batman's the more fascinating fictional character to have a swim around in as he's changed so drastically with the culture, but right now, the whole 'dark driven avenger of the night' thing just feels so insanely dull...

bwahahahahahaha