Hanging out with flatmate

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This is probably going to sound really bitchy etc.

but what happens when you live in a flat and your flatmate is constantly bored and wants your company when you need to be alone?

Like, things were all fine for ages but a while ago my flatmate broke up with his bird and now all the weekends and stuff he wants to go out and me to go with him when I kind of want to be alone/do other stuff. And it's hard to just say "i need some space man!", like, he's been a friend for ages before moving in but not hanging out ALL THE TIME and now conversations run very dry. and you can't escape cos it's your house, and my social schedule isn't that great so I can't even say i have other plans.

What's the polite way of saying "i don't really want to hang out all the time" without sounding like, horrible?

― someone who lives in a flat, Monday, 2 February 2004 12:33 (twenty years ago) link

What's the polite way of saying "i don't really want to hang out all the time" without sounding like, horrible?

There isn't! But you might try explaining to him that you enjoy your own space & sometimes you don't always want to go out.

― Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Monday, 2 February 2004 12:35 (twenty years ago) link

you sound like you're living in my personal hell

― the surface noise (electricsound), Monday, 2 February 2004 12:35 (twenty years ago) link

you're living in opposite world from me, which i've been moaning about lately but yours sounds worse.

(my flatmate seems to be depressed and spends all her time not at work hiding in her room. she's nice enough, but we aren't friends, which is a bit of a bummer. i'm actually thinking about moving because of it)

― colette (a2lette), Monday, 2 February 2004 13:03 (twenty years ago) link

I couldn't live with someone who wasn't a friend, it would just be awful.

― Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Monday, 2 February 2004 13:05 (twenty years ago) link

Spanish girl i live with but rarely seem to talk to (she ignores us all) is moving out i think - so we will need a new girl! i'm taking her room though

― stevem (blueski), Monday, 2 February 2004 13:11 (twenty years ago) link

Tell them you are studying, and go to room

― Stringent Stepper (Stringent), Monday, 2 February 2004 13:13 (twenty years ago) link

Yesterday afternoon I accidentally stumbled across a collection of pictures that give an entirely different meaning to "hanging out with flatmate". It was disgusting and sordid and the mystery Thai girl who was is partner in crime should be ashamed of herself. And now I can never look him in the face without being sick/laughing out loud and need to move out as soon as possible.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Monday, 2 February 2004 13:18 (twenty years ago) link

DAMMIT I PROMISED MYSELF I WOULDN'T POST THAT!

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Monday, 2 February 2004 13:19 (twenty years ago) link

I'd just like to point out that I do not and neither have I ever lived with Matt DC

― chris (chris), Monday, 2 February 2004 13:26 (twenty years ago) link

'accidentally stumbled'

― stevem (blueski), Monday, 2 February 2004 13:40 (twenty years ago) link

i'm really confused by what's going on in matt's house. is this why you go out straight after work instead of going home first?

― colette (a2lette), Monday, 2 February 2004 13:41 (twenty years ago) link

'turned his entire room upside down while he was out after hearing camera clicks and much groaning one night a few weeks back'

― stevem (blueski), Monday, 2 February 2004 13:41 (twenty years ago) link

Try 'borrowed his laptop to go on the Interweb and then foolishly looked in the scanned images folder'

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Monday, 2 February 2004 13:45 (twenty years ago) link

come on, it could've been anyone's arse (except mine)

― stevem (blueski), Monday, 2 February 2004 13:47 (twenty years ago) link

well there are times when i think maybe i should live with someone i don't know. and then at least i don't feel any kind of responsibility over people in don't know.

I guess this has a little bit of the same sentiment as the your friends turn to you as the "sane one" who they can talk to about shit, when you yourself are actually a somewhat well-disguised emotional wreck? thread.

― someone who lives in a flat, Monday, 2 February 2004 13:49 (twenty years ago) link

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