Stem cell research application #23421 = CLEAVAGE

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― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 9 February 2004 19:27 (twenty-two years ago)

http://web1.ami-admin.com/perl/trackimage.pl?I=55607&H=weeklyworldnews%2Ecom&Image=http%3A%2F%2Fweb1%2Eami%2Dadmin%2Ecom%2Fimages%2F47118%2Ejpg

― My Huckleberry Friend (Horace Mann), Monday, 9 February 2004 19:30 (twenty-two years ago)

Oh, Canada.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 9 February 2004 19:40 (twenty-two years ago)

Xtina's Grammy dress to thread

― Matos W.K. (M Matos), Monday, 9 February 2004 19:44 (twenty-two years ago)

actuall, the wwn article makes no mention of Canada.

― My Huckleberry Friend (Horace Mann), Monday, 9 February 2004 19:48 (twenty-two years ago)

funny that.

― Kingfish Funyun (Kingfish), Monday, 9 February 2004 19:55 (twenty-two years ago)

"He called for more animal trials before widespread use of the technique in human patients."

What do they do with all the large-breasted animals after they trails are over?

― martin m. (mushrush), Monday, 9 February 2004 20:01 (twenty-two years ago)

sell them to KFC?

― Kingfish Funyun (Kingfish), Monday, 9 February 2004 20:02 (twenty-two years ago)

Best Petting Zoo Ever!

― My Huckleberry Friend (Horace Mann), Monday, 9 February 2004 20:03 (twenty-two years ago)

True horror story to ponder while eating your next thanksgiving turkey.
The turkey's they breed nowadays are all bred to have large, juicy, meaty breats. Unfortunately, this gene is passed on even to the tom turkeys. This leads to a problem. The build of a tom turkey makes it tricky for them to mount a hen-turkey when the tom turkey is endowed like Anna Nicole Smith.
Hence, all the hens are artificially inseminated.
But I haven't gotten to the horrible part yet....

Before the industry was able to concoct a tom turkey sperm milking machine, they had to hire someone to "retrieve" the tom-turkey's semen.

Yes...ladies and gentlemen...the worst job in the world...Assistant Turkey Jerker.

― Lord Custos Omicron (Lord Custos Omicron), Monday, 9 February 2004 20:08 (twenty-two years ago)

I think this might be a worse job:
http://web1.ami-admin.com/images/12291.jpg

― My Huckleberry Friend (Horace Mann), Monday, 9 February 2004 20:11 (twenty-two years ago)

You think of wanking animals when you eat, Custos? Each to his own.

― Markelby (Mark C), Monday, 9 February 2004 20:52 (twenty-two years ago)

No, I heard about this on the radio and stumbled across a news article about it a couple years later.
I only remembered it because of the whole "sell them to KFC"/"Best Petting Zoo Evah!" comments.

― Lord Custos Omicron (Lord Custos Omicron), Monday, 9 February 2004 20:54 (twenty-two years ago)

Best Petting Zoo Ever!

http://images.amazon.com/images/P/B000001IRB.01.LZZZZZZZ.jpg

― j.lu (j.lu), Monday, 9 February 2004 21:06 (twenty-two years ago)

Beat me to it

― ModJ (ModJ), Monday, 9 February 2004 22:12 (twenty-two years ago)

It's funny, I thought this would be a real biology thread because there really is a thing called cell cleavage i.e. Julia to thread.

― Leee Majors (Leee), Monday, 9 February 2004 22:14 (twenty-two years ago)

Worse than the turkey wanking itself is when the wanker has to transfer the semen from the collecting receptacle. This is done with a thin straw - one sucks up a little way and then release. The employee I heard talking about it confirmed that from time to time he would suck too hard and get it in his mouth.

― N. (nickdastoor), Monday, 9 February 2004 22:20 (twenty-two years ago)

YOU ARE LYING.

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 9 February 2004 23:02 (twenty-two years ago)

But what if he isn't?

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 9 February 2004 23:34 (twenty-two years ago)

Actually, I'm not lying.

― N. (nickdastoor), Monday, 9 February 2004 23:53 (twenty-two years ago)

So there.

― ModJ (ModJ), Monday, 9 February 2004 23:56 (twenty-two years ago)

Worse than the turkey wanking itself

This part kind of jumped out at me and added a whole new twist...

― the krza (krza), Tuesday, 10 February 2004 02:13 (twenty-two years ago)

(xxxpost)

― the krza (krza), Tuesday, 10 February 2004 02:14 (twenty-two years ago)

...This is done with a thin straw - one sucks up a little way and then release....
Oh, God! It's worse than I thought. I was under the impression they used, like, padded salad tongs or something.

― Lord Custos Omicron (Lord Custos Omicron), Tuesday, 10 February 2004 02:15 (twenty-two years ago)

The employee I heard talking about it confirmed that from time to time he would suck too hard and get it in his mouth.
[* insert joke about "gravy" here *]

― Lord Custos Omicron (Lord Custos Omicron), Tuesday, 10 February 2004 02:16 (twenty-two years ago)

Ew. Ew. Ew. C'mon, they've gotta use pipettes, the straw idea is too repulsive.

there really is a thing called cell cleavage i.e. Julia to thread.

Hmm, do you think ILX would be talking about tits or cytokinesis?

― JuliaA (j_bdules), Tuesday, 10 February 2004 02:25 (twenty-two years ago)

good point

― Orbit (Orbit), Tuesday, 10 February 2004 02:25 (twenty-two years ago)

I guess a squeezy pipette wouldn't empty cleanly enough.

― N. (nickdastoor), Tuesday, 10 February 2004 02:29 (twenty-two years ago)

cytokinesis is hereby nominated for most awesome new slang for dressing, uh, provocatively. Do I hear a second?

― Huckleberry Hoser, Tuesday, 10 February 2004 04:23 (twenty-two years ago)

Sure.

― JuliaA (j_bdules), Tuesday, 10 February 2004 05:23 (twenty-two years ago)

Only if cryokinesis becomes the new slang for dressing so badly that it sends chills of fright down peoples spines.

― Lord Custos Omicron (Lord Custos Omicron), Tuesday, 10 February 2004 13:51 (twenty-two years ago)

I guess a squeezy pipette wouldn't empty cleanly enough.

I was wondering why you couldn't use a turkey baster for this function.

― j.lu (j.lu), Tuesday, 10 February 2004 14:03 (twenty-two years ago)

It would be too ironic. The birds would die of hipster laughter syndrome. The strain on their poor beaks!

― Liz :x (Liz :x), Tuesday, 10 February 2004 14:09 (twenty-two years ago)

I like watching ladies tennis on TV for all the awesome cytokinesis!

― My Huckleberry Friend (Horace Mann), Tuesday, 10 February 2004 14:34 (twenty-two years ago)

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