Ransacked!

Message Bookmarked

Bookmark Removed

I went back to my old apartment today to do a once over and pick up a few items I left behind prior to turning over the keys and found it had been RANSACKED!!! My (dirty!) laundry that I left there was overturned and the (broken!!) dvd player and stereo were gone and the leftover Xmas junk in my closet was completely strewn about! The fridge was practically upended and the walls were a disaster!! The only loss to me that actually mattered remotely was a missing box of Xmas ornaments I was going to give to my mom. Is it wrong of me to be completely delighted and excited by this situation?

― Allyzay, Thursday, 12 February 2004 01:26 (twenty-two years ago)

Not wrong at all! Thank the thieves for doing work for you. (Unless the walls come out of any deposit you had.)

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 12 February 2004 01:28 (twenty-two years ago)

Haha no deposit, Ned--remember, my former company owned the apartment.

― Allyzay, Thursday, 12 February 2004 01:29 (twenty-two years ago)

Brilliant! Celebrate openly.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 12 February 2004 01:30 (twenty-two years ago)

I just don't understand who the hell goes in and ransacks dirty laundry and rotten food in a fridge. Freaks, obviously. The (stolen!! by me!!) Tiffany lamp worth hundreds of dollars, however, is still there??? Obviously broken and speakerless stereo gone though. WTF? And...Christmas ornaments?

― Allyzay, Thursday, 12 February 2004 01:33 (twenty-two years ago)

Spray paint some swastikas on the walls and call it a day. A glorious day.

― dean! (deangulberry), Thursday, 12 February 2004 01:33 (twenty-two years ago)

The Tiffany lamp is still there? Where did you say you lived again?

― hstencil, Thursday, 12 February 2004 01:35 (twenty-two years ago)

No you're not wrong. Fuck the old, bring on the new! I'm moving in a few months myself so I'm actually getting a vicarious thrill out of this story.

― jody (Jody Beth Rosen), Thursday, 12 February 2004 01:35 (twenty-two years ago)

seriously, I could use the hundreds of dollars, Ally.

― hstencil, Thursday, 12 February 2004 01:38 (twenty-two years ago)

excellent, if this was your time to be robbed it was a great time.

― teeny (teeny), Thursday, 12 February 2004 01:41 (twenty-two years ago)

just remember:

they can take your dirty undies but they can never take your internet friends from you

― dean! (deangulberry), Thursday, 12 February 2004 01:44 (twenty-two years ago)

At first I was really pissed off about the Christmas ornaments but then I was like HAHAHAHAHA LOOK AT THIS SHITHOLE NOW. The place was in bad condition to begin with thanks to my employers refusing to fix a lot of serious issues (a massive leak, for starters, that blew out the electricity completely in my bathroom and destroyed tiling and rugs prior to me going ahead and destroying it further for them over the course of a year).

I just can't believe they totally jacked up the walls like that!! I was amazed, better than I could've done myself.

― Allyzay, Thursday, 12 February 2004 01:55 (twenty-two years ago)

spray paint "I AM BACK" in red!

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Thursday, 12 February 2004 01:57 (twenty-two years ago)

"I AM BLACK"

― dean! (deangulberry), Thursday, 12 February 2004 02:01 (twenty-two years ago)

A few "REDRUM" additions here and there.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 12 February 2004 02:04 (twenty-two years ago)

"ALLEE-Z 4 FUK N SHAME"

― donut bitch (donut), Thursday, 12 February 2004 02:04 (twenty-two years ago)

I splattered some Hoisin sauce on the walls but really it was a weak effort. You all should drop by and do some damage.

― Allyzay, Thursday, 12 February 2004 02:05 (twenty-two years ago)

draw a bunch of kiddie-style scribbles on the walls like Meatwad

― nate detritus (natedetritus), Thursday, 12 February 2004 02:06 (twenty-two years ago)

I want to drop by and liberate that lamp. I need to pay rent.

― hstencil, Thursday, 12 February 2004 02:06 (twenty-two years ago)

i fess up, cause you didn't go to dizzee rascal or roadhouse!

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Thursday, 12 February 2004 02:13 (twenty-two years ago)

ju fuk up my work life, i fuk up you apartment FUCKAS

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Thursday, 12 February 2004 02:15 (twenty-two years ago)

Ally, the 'I AM BACK' instruction is pretty specific to NYC apartments, especially if you're a serial-killer/80s-metaphor.

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Thursday, 12 February 2004 02:17 (twenty-two years ago)

Dignan: "We did really good back there, Anthony! We got the tivo, the DVD player, the stereo, and the christmas ornaments!"

Anthony: "You took the christmas ornaments, Dignan?"

― TOMBOT, Thursday, 12 February 2004 02:38 (twenty-two years ago)

"DON'T CALL IT A COMEBACK"

― ModJ (ModJ), Thursday, 12 February 2004 03:34 (twenty-two years ago)

Maybe I coulda went to Dizzee Rascal if more than ONE of the people who said they could help me actually showed up, but c'est la vie.

― Allyzay, Thursday, 12 February 2004 03:49 (twenty-two years ago)

Yay me!

― ModJ (ModJ), Thursday, 12 February 2004 03:50 (twenty-two years ago)

Oh, who am I kidding...

― ModJ (ModJ), Thursday, 12 February 2004 03:51 (twenty-two years ago)

Dude, now is the time for that "leaving party" where you just trash the place that I was talking about. Cockroach eggs in the walls and shrimp sewed in the curtains, all that crap. yeah.

― The River Kate (kate), Thursday, 12 February 2004 16:01 (twenty-two years ago)

where on earth can you get cockroach eggs?

― chris (chris), Thursday, 12 February 2004 16:15 (twenty-two years ago)

Heh. the friend who did this worked for the science department of a university, and he ordered them through the biology lab. Or you can just stuff rotting meat into the cracks, that will bring cockroaches pronto.

― The River Kate (kate), Thursday, 12 February 2004 16:17 (twenty-two years ago)

(mental note: do NOT get on the wrong side of Kate)

― Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Thursday, 12 February 2004 16:18 (twenty-two years ago)

You know, Vince Neil *was* in town recently...

― Jeanne Fury (Jeanne Fury), Thursday, 12 February 2004 16:23 (twenty-two years ago)

You must be logged in to post. Please either login here, or if you are not registered, you may register here.