U.S. Message to Afghanistan Soldiers

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""Our forces are armed with state of the art military equipment. What are you using, obsolete and ineffective weaponry? Our helicopters will rain fire down upon your camps before you detect them on your radar. Our bombs are so accurate we can drop them right through your windows. Our infantry is trained for any climate and terrain on earth. United States soldiers fire with superior marksmanship and are armed with superior weapons," one radio script reads.

Here's a complete text of one broadcast: "Attention Taliban! You are condemned. Did you know that? The instant the terrorists you support took over our planes, you sentenced yourselves to death. The Armed Forces of the United States are here to seek justice for our dead. Highly trained soldiers are coming to shut down once and for all Osama bin Laden's ring of terrorism, and the Taliban that supports them and their actions. "

― Mike Hanle y, Thursday, 18 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

word.

― chaki, Thursday, 18 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

"I AM WIND IN HIS HAIR. CAN YOU SEE THAT I AM NOT AFRAID?"

― JM, Thursday, 18 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Well, what do you expect, it's propaganda. Did you think the messages were going to be: "Hey, Taliban, bring some friends over for a party we're throwing!"

― Ned Raggett, Thursday, 18 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

You knwo Ned, that may work out well

― Mike Hanle y, Thursday, 18 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

It would have to be alcohol-free, though.

― Ned Raggett, Thursday, 18 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

My cousin traveled through central Asia and he says the Uzbeks drink a ton of vodka. The Taliban, probably not so much.

― Kris, Thursday, 18 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

The Taliban sells heroin

― Mike Hanle y, Thursday, 18 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I reckon they should threaten them with Limp Bizkit on a loop on a massive PA on one of those low flying gunships, that will break them !

― DJ Martian, Thursday, 18 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

he says the Uzbeks drink a ton of vodka. The Taliban, probably not so much

Isn't alcohol forbidden under strict Islamic belief? If so, there's your source of conflict between the Taliban and the Northern Alliance. Maybe we should promise everyone there free beer and the Taliban would crumble overnight.

― Ned Raggett, Thursday, 18 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Blowing up buildings is forbidden under Islamic belief too.

― Kris, Thursday, 18 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

A simultaneous hurrah and boo for free interpretations.

― Ned Raggett, Thursday, 18 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I think we should blast Hanle y's music from helicopters, à la Apocalypse Now.

"Give up now, Osama, if you don't want to listen to this anymore or be visited by its creator!" By the time they get to "Pocari Sweet," Osama will be begging to have his innards scooped out and deep fried in front of his face!

― Tadeusz Suchodolski, Thursday, 18 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Maybe it'll be like in Mars Attacks and they'll just go all gooey exploding and shit? (could happen)

― Kim, Thursday, 18 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

They'll go all goopey and shit when they get fucked the fuck up by explosions thanks to out state of the art, superior weapons, which we deliver with superior marksmanship.

*doing his Duvall impression*

"THE TOWEL HEADS ARE SCARED OF WAGNER!"

― JM, Thursday, 18 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

send over richard simmons - that'll sort the fuckers out.

― Geoff, Friday, 19 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

the Taliban were payed by the US to destroy the heroin crops in the past couple of years. the only heroin crops left, supposedly, are in the areas controlled by the Northern Alliance, who still sell the stuff

― m jemmeson, Friday, 19 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

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