That one guy who puts on shorts the second the weather gets a LITTLE BIT warmer: C/D?

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For those of you in colder climates, I'm sure you're all familiar with this guy. You've all seen him. He just can't wait to get into those shorts. It's still only four degrees above freezing but jesus christ.. he's been waiting for this one day all winter. Watch him now. The sun's shining, the birds are a-chirpin', his ballsack's feeling that cool late winter breeze, and to him, there's no better sensation in the world than this.

― maypang (maypang), Sunday, 29 February 2004 06:23 (twenty-two years ago)

He's the asslicker I like to splash with my car, the hairy palmed snotgobbler who wore sugar sacks and sunglasses at high school dances. I've already seen some of these idiots here.

― Kenny Blankenship (Bryan), Sunday, 29 February 2004 06:30 (twenty-two years ago)

kick him to death

― anthony kyle monday (akmonday), Sunday, 29 February 2004 06:36 (twenty-two years ago)

I saw one walk into the beer store the other day, army shorts 'n all. It felt like I was spotting some rare and exotic animal.

― maypang (maypang), Sunday, 29 February 2004 06:45 (twenty-two years ago)

You have to wear sunglasses in Seattle in late spring, because everyone takes off their shirts and wears shorts once it hits the 60sF, and you risk damaging your eyes from the assault of pale white flesh everywhere.

― donut bitch (donut), Sunday, 29 February 2004 06:50 (twenty-two years ago)

At the University of Missouri, we called those people Iowans.

― Pleasant Plains (Pleasant Plains), Sunday, 29 February 2004 06:54 (twenty-two years ago)

what about the girl who puts on a miniskirt the second the weather gets a LITTLE BIT warmer?

― anthony kyle monday (akmonday), Sunday, 29 February 2004 06:55 (twenty-two years ago)

Girls will wear miniskirts at any point of the year though.

― maypang (maypang), Sunday, 29 February 2004 06:56 (twenty-two years ago)

Well.. the slutty ones, anyway.

― maypang (maypang), Sunday, 29 February 2004 06:57 (twenty-two years ago)

So, why the double standard, maypang? Maybe that one guy is a slut too.

― donut bitch (donut), Sunday, 29 February 2004 06:59 (twenty-two years ago)

girls who think they are being slutty by wearing miniskirts: classic. guys who think they are being slutty by wearing shorts: dud beyond dud

― anthony kyle monday (akmonday), Sunday, 29 February 2004 07:01 (twenty-two years ago)

http://members.aol.com/brccindy/Don-Shorts-99Picnic.jpg

Just for anthony and maypang.

― donut bitch (donut), Sunday, 29 February 2004 07:03 (twenty-two years ago)

I can smell the balls from here.

― maypang (maypang), Sunday, 29 February 2004 07:04 (twenty-two years ago)

I love how that file's named "Don-Shorts-99Picnic.jpg". It's as if even the photographer knew it was the highlight of the picture.

― maypang (maypang), Sunday, 29 February 2004 07:05 (twenty-two years ago)

http://www.discount-intimate-apparel.com/562-mens-satin-boxer-shorts.jpg

Hmmmmm, nothing like a pair of satins that don't fucking run away from duty

― donut bitch (donut), Sunday, 29 February 2004 07:06 (twenty-two years ago)

Hey, this is about more than just shorts, you know.

― maypang (maypang), Sunday, 29 February 2004 07:07 (twenty-two years ago)

http://www.mrc-cbu.cam.ac.uk/cnbh/web2002/photos/winter/shorts.jpg

― maypang (maypang), Sunday, 29 February 2004 07:07 (twenty-two years ago)

TS: that one guy who puts on shorts the second the weather gets a LITTLE BIT warmer vs. that one guy who puts on a sweater the second the weather gets a LITTLE BIT colder

― donut bitch (donut), Sunday, 29 February 2004 07:09 (twenty-two years ago)

yeah, I wear miniskirts all year round.

There's really no excuse for shorts though

― tokyo rosemary (rosemary), Sunday, 29 February 2004 07:10 (twenty-two years ago)

Sweater dude wins. Duh.

http://www.webcom.com/collectr/ce/images/cpcosbyb.jpg

― maypang (maypang), Sunday, 29 February 2004 07:16 (twenty-two years ago)

Non-athletic, non-sk8r shorts in any context are super dud. The subject of this thread, however, is C+++ because he makes me laugh and I admire his fortitude and forthright bullheadedness. Plus, I ain't him, which is A-OK by me.

Should I be happy that I turned off ILX pictures, in regards to what's been posted?

― David R. (popshots75`), Sunday, 29 February 2004 07:22 (twenty-two years ago)

well, do yourself a favor and turn on pics just for the post before yours, then turn them back off again.

― donut bitch (donut), Sunday, 29 February 2004 07:29 (twenty-two years ago)

Man, I don't wanna see pics of Bill Cosby @ 2:30 in the morning! I'm trying to get some sleep here!

― David R. (popshots75`), Sunday, 29 February 2004 07:31 (twenty-two years ago)

PUDDING! :)

― donut bitch (donut), Sunday, 29 February 2004 07:33 (twenty-two years ago)

I saw a girl at school wearing sandals the other day. I dislike sandals enough in the summer, but she just looked so awful and wrong tromping around the little piles of last week's snow in sandals (which, by the way, were white), rolled-up jeans, and a parka. But yeah, that shorts guy sucks, too.

― kirsten (kirsten), Sunday, 29 February 2004 07:33 (twenty-two years ago)

Haha, i missed this.. since when did shorts become the back hair of guy fashion. Wasn't there another thread where all the girls said guys should never wear shorts ever? (I don't wear shorts only because i'm too lazy and cheap to buy clothes i will only wear for two months a year)

― donut bitch (donut), Sunday, 29 February 2004 08:03 (twenty-two years ago)

i think there have been a million threads where we've said that, db

― tokyo rosemary (rosemary), Sunday, 29 February 2004 08:04 (twenty-two years ago)

http://www.chrismilian.com/rs12.jpg

but really, rosemary, why do you feel this way.. i just don't understand the bias here.

― donut bitch (donut), Sunday, 29 February 2004 08:07 (twenty-two years ago)

Shorts are very practical, and I think one ought to wear them at the first possible opportunity. However I am also filled with respect for people who would sacrifice their comfort, maybe even endure heat stroke, in order to preserve an aesthetic ideal. Obviously these enemy camps both fight a noble cause.

― Amity (Amity), Sunday, 29 February 2004 08:39 (twenty-two years ago)

http://www.utilikilts.com/images/survival/surfrontbig.jpg

Not even a (*snicker*) SURVIVAL UTILIKILT?

― donut bitch (donut), Sunday, 29 February 2004 08:54 (twenty-two years ago)

Donut Bitch, I knew I could trust you to be on the 'shorts' side, with your sensitivity to pretension - [the 'not sarcastic' emoticon. Is that like ':|'?]

― Amity (Amity), Sunday, 29 February 2004 09:01 (twenty-two years ago)

I think I will use that emoticon a lot. :|

― Amity (Amity), Sunday, 29 February 2004 09:02 (twenty-two years ago)

actually, that's looks more like a skateboard than an emoticon.. dude!

― donut bitch (donut), Sunday, 29 February 2004 09:07 (twenty-two years ago)

Okay, I never claimed to be able to see

― Amity (Amity), Sunday, 29 February 2004 09:08 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm on a kick of being disgusted at the way ILX rags on everyone. But, the shorts in winter guy... I mean, it doesn't bother me, but seriously dude, why? Here in Wyoming it happens EVEN IF IT IS BELOW 0! But, whatever, some one probably hates on my Chuck Taylors.

― Speedy (Speedy Gonzalas), Sunday, 29 February 2004 09:19 (twenty-two years ago)

its weird here in an inverse way. soon as it gets a wee bit colder (say drops from 30 down to 25, or even at the sight of CLOUDS) suddenly everyones got their fucking leather jackets on. wankers.

― mullygrubber (gaz), Sunday, 29 February 2004 09:21 (twenty-two years ago)

I am aware that most people find shorts appalling, and that I have legs that are fat, but I where them anyways because I get really fucking hot and my nuts start to sweat.

― christhamrin (christhamrin), Sunday, 29 February 2004 09:39 (twenty-two years ago)

get low, get low get low get low

― cinniblount (James Blount), Sunday, 29 February 2004 09:54 (twenty-two years ago)

I will defend shorts, though cause I got nice legs. Hey I ain't no beauty king but I ride my bike or ski every day. If you got it, brag.

― Speedy (Speedy Gonzalas), Sunday, 29 February 2004 09:58 (twenty-two years ago)

Even when I was skinny my legs were fat, but I say FUCK YOUR FACIST BEAUTY STANDARDS. Well, no, I don't say that, I just saw it on a t-shirt once.

― christhamrin (christhamrin), Sunday, 29 February 2004 10:04 (twenty-two years ago)

hahahah!

― Speedy (Speedy Gonzalas), Sunday, 29 February 2004 10:09 (twenty-two years ago)

http://photo.vavatch.co.uk/mayweek2002/gardengroup.jpg

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Sunday, 29 February 2004 10:39 (twenty-two years ago)

Exercise gurus who wear sequined tank tops, classic or EEEEUUUUUUUUWWWWWW!!!!!!??????

― Skottie, Sunday, 29 February 2004 16:05 (twenty-two years ago)

I didn't want to have to do this, but

http://www.carrottop.com/ct_pix/gallery_pix/gallery_3_28/baby_carrots/be-seated1.jpg

― Pleasant Plains (Pleasant Plains), Sunday, 29 February 2004 17:42 (twenty-two years ago)

That's not that bad.

I saw a guy yesterday wearing shorts.

OMG!!!

Legs so hairy, you couldn't tell what color his skin was. Wasn't the first time I saw someone like that. Last time I saw a guy with really hairy legs, he was riding a bike.

I saw about four guys with shorts yesterday. Oh my. The weather is even warmer today! LOOK OUT!!!!

They'll all be out today!!

― Aja (aja), Sunday, 29 February 2004 17:54 (twenty-two years ago)

oow! and I hate it when they wear these on their feet!

http://www.foot-spy.com/images/hike-feet-4.jpg

― Aja (aja), Sunday, 29 February 2004 17:59 (twenty-two years ago)

I knew a guy in high school who wore shorts every day of the year. His wedding was probably the third time I ever saw him in pants.

― Stuart (Stuart), Sunday, 29 February 2004 18:13 (twenty-two years ago)

Oh yeah. I used to have a friend who wore shorts everyday. At least every day that I saw him. He was like the only person I know of who wore the school shorts.

― Aja (aja), Sunday, 29 February 2004 18:15 (twenty-two years ago)

http://www.gadflyonline.com/graphics/features/ChristineDaveGrohl.jpg

― maypang (maypang), Sunday, 29 February 2004 18:46 (twenty-two years ago)

I am one of these men, almost.

― Sick Nouthall (Nick Southall), Sunday, 29 February 2004 18:59 (twenty-two years ago)

haha it's 60 degrees today and my friend had to break out his shorts.

― oops (Oops), Sunday, 29 February 2004 19:09 (twenty-two years ago)

Thanks May.

No men should ever wear shorts!! It's just WRONG!! Bad decision!!

― Aja (aja), Sunday, 29 February 2004 19:15 (twenty-two years ago)

Yesterday I saw a fellow who exited a vehicle with a very expensive looking blonde. He was very short, and wearing a trucker hat with nothing on it, a far too tight plain brown t-shirt, and red and white Bermuda shorts.

― Gear! (Gear!), Sunday, 29 February 2004 19:54 (twenty-two years ago)

OMG.

EYESORE!!

― Aja (aja), Sunday, 29 February 2004 19:56 (twenty-two years ago)

No men should ever wear shorts!! It's just WRONG!! Bad decision
C'mon Aja, what a sexist thing to say. That could be equated with "Women should never wear pants." Or " Children should be seen and not heard."

― Speedy (Speedy Gonzalas), Sunday, 29 February 2004 21:09 (twenty-two years ago)

You know what.

No one should wear shorts.

I don't like shorts. I don't even think women look good in them.

Shorts under a skirt are fine, but in plain sight!!!

Oh lord.

I don't know. I have problems with certain apparle.

― Aja (aja), Sunday, 29 February 2004 21:11 (twenty-two years ago)

Children are a different gender?!

― Sick Nouthall (Nick Southall), Sunday, 29 February 2004 21:46 (twenty-two years ago)

No.

I'm just stating that no one, male or female, should wear shorts. I'm sorry if you don't agree, but it just doesn't seem right. And like I said, I have problems with certain apparle.

― Aja (aja), Sunday, 29 February 2004 21:48 (twenty-two years ago)

'apparel'

― luna (luna.c), Sunday, 29 February 2004 23:43 (twenty-two years ago)

i totallt like think they should make a way to like air condition outside ya know?

― mullygrubber (gaz), Sunday, 29 February 2004 23:53 (twenty-two years ago)

http://www.bahamaoutfitters.com/images/500_tall_art_archive/fan_500_tall.jpg

― maypang (maypang), Sunday, 29 February 2004 23:57 (twenty-two years ago)

I almost never wear shorts. Even in the summer. I don't know. I think it has something to do with my fear of relaxation. Whatever.
Anyhow, my friend Danny, who I ran into the other day wears shorts year-round. When it gets cold (as it always does) he just wears long underwear. Which, to me, might negate the appeal of shorts, but not to him. He loves shorts. And KISS. The band. And Danzig. The man.

― Huck, Monday, 1 March 2004 00:15 (twenty-two years ago)

http://www.geocities.com/redhalcyon/me-crusher-small.txt

― Leee the Whiney (Leee), Monday, 1 March 2004 06:25 (twenty-two years ago)

omg, how old are you in that picture Leee?

― gygax! (gygax!), Monday, 1 March 2004 06:30 (twenty-two years ago)

23
14-15?

― Leee the Whiney (Leee), Monday, 1 March 2004 06:52 (twenty-two years ago)

haha! i bet that's a giants cap!

― gygax! (gygax!), Monday, 1 March 2004 06:58 (twenty-two years ago)

And didn't anyone ever tell you? They're called a fannypacks, not cockpacks.

― maypang (maypang), Monday, 1 March 2004 07:03 (twenty-two years ago)

The Onion: "Nation's UPS Men Break Out the Shorts

― jaymc (jaymc), Monday, 1 March 2004 07:07 (twenty-two years ago)

*RACISM ALERT*

My mom said to me "White people will wear shorts at the drop of a hat!"
I see a new thread...

― Donna Brown (Donna Brown), Monday, 1 March 2004 23:33 (twenty-two years ago)

Yes, that's a Giants cap, but I realized that I'm actually 17 in that pic. Christ. And I still dress like that!

― Leee the Whiney (Leee), Monday, 1 March 2004 23:55 (twenty-two years ago)

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