Invent a perversion

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So...mistakenly on another thread I claimed there were no Hat Fetish sites on the internet..(don't ask..). Well, of course there were. So what I'm asking is...can anyone come up with a fetish/perversion that can't be found online anywhere?

Let me start the ball rolling...Tree Sex?

― winterland, Tuesday, 2 March 2004 09:07 (twenty-one years ago)

mexican luchador mask sex

― Pablo Cruise (chaki), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 09:15 (twenty-one years ago)

Rock sucking

― Gear! (Gear!), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 09:16 (twenty-one years ago)

eye boogers

― Pablo Cruise (chaki), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 09:17 (twenty-one years ago)

Faultline Fornication

― Jarlr'mai (jarlrmai), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 09:18 (twenty-one years ago)

Buttons up the bum

― Sym (shmuel), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 09:18 (twenty-one years ago)

vanilla sex?

― the music mole (colin s barrow), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 09:22 (twenty-one years ago)

mako shark fellatio

― Gear! (Gear!), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 09:26 (twenty-one years ago)

OK I'm gonna discount 'buttons up the bum' and 'shark fellatio'...those or something pretty damn near 'em have got to have come up...'rock sucking' in the lead for me by a way...

― winterland, Tuesday, 2 March 2004 09:29 (twenty-one years ago)

anal sex in a vat of cherry kool-aid?

― ipsofacto (ipsofacto), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 09:29 (twenty-one years ago)

are you googling all of them? scary.

― Sym (shmuel), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 09:30 (twenty-one years ago)

Bat-sex.

― Sick Nouthall (Nick Southall), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 09:31 (twenty-one years ago)

As in the wee, squeaky flying mammals, not 'baseball' or 'cricket'. I know too well that people enjoy that kind of bat-sex.

― Sick Nouthall (Nick Southall), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 09:32 (twenty-one years ago)

x-post

Yep..if tonight I get arrested and my computer impounded by the police you know Big Brother really is watching

― winterland, Tuesday, 2 March 2004 09:33 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.tigtail.org/TIG/TVM/B/NAmerican/c.%20cold%20war/mccarthy-paul/M/mccarthy_garden.1992.jpg

― anthony, Tuesday, 2 March 2004 09:33 (twenty-one years ago)

insert 'woody' joke here

― winterland, Tuesday, 2 March 2004 09:33 (twenty-one years ago)

I think anything remotely phallic shaped has at least been attempted in this house

― ipsofacto (ipsofacto), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 09:34 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.gonzo.org/tree.html

― sdfsd, Tuesday, 2 March 2004 09:34 (twenty-one years ago)

ILX is becoming more Momus than Momus. I started a script once called 'Young Doctor Scissors', which was going to be animated by a Canadian called Haig Bedrossian. The plot was that a young psychoanalyst, ambitious to make his name, sets out to 'discover' a slew of new sexual perversions undocumented by the 'exhaustive' encyclopaedias of Krafft-Ebing and Fenichel. The script never got finished because the preparatory fieldwork was too much fun. I'm still researching it, in fact.

― Momus (Momus), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 09:35 (twenty-one years ago)

For Nick..lesbian cartoon bat-sex even;

This comic updates extremely sporadically, and I’m not even entirely sure that it’s still active. Still, there’s just something about it that appeals to me. I think it might be the fact that one of the characters is a bat. I like bats; they aren’t enough of them in web comics. Besides that, I think the artist has a really nice, original style. In an era where most comics are just manga rip-offs, there’s something to be said for a style that’s more evocative of the smurfs than anything else. And I mean that as a compliment.
Lesbian goth comics?: Yeah.
Bats?: Yes.
Female cartoon character sexier than Scooby Doo’s Velma?: No. Well, maybe the bat is. But that’s cause she’s a bat and I want to have sex with bats. Tantric bat sex with bats. Hur hur.
Male character sexier than Oliver Wood?: No.

― winterland, Tuesday, 2 March 2004 09:40 (twenty-one years ago)

For all those out there who claim that pornography leads to perversion, rather than the other way round, maybe we should invent an ILE perversion, start up a copule of sites on it, then see if we can get people hooked on it...

― winterland, Tuesday, 2 March 2004 09:42 (twenty-one years ago)

Stealing women's toenail clippings.

― All Bunged Up. (Jake Proudlock), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 10:08 (twenty-one years ago)

Masturbating to diagrams of molecular structures

― C J (C J), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 10:12 (twenty-one years ago)

Bee sex!

― Johnney B (Johnney B), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 11:05 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.england-photo-library.fsnet.co.uk/london6/images/3101.jpg

― ken c (ken c), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 11:09 (twenty-one years ago)

fetish roadmap http://www.deviantdesires.com/map/mappics/map81002.gif

These has been done:

FETISH ROADMAP - TEXT ONLY

A. ANIMAL TRANSFORMATION

1. Ponyplay, Cowplay, Puppyplay, etc.
2. Furries, Furverts and Fetish Fursuiters
3. Vore, Turkey Man

B. GROWTH

1. Macrophiles (Giantess Fans)
2. Crush Freaks
3. Weight Gain/Feeders
4. Body Inflation
5. Balloon Fetish

C. OBJECT TRANSFORMATION

1. Robots/Dolls
2. Latex Mask
3. Plushies

D. TABOO BREAKING

1. Messy Fun (wetlook, mudlarking, sploshing)
2. Quicksand
3. Pieplay and Clowns
4. Knicker-wetting
5. Adult Babies

There were several other ways I could have organized the fetish map, showing a different set of common themes. Here are some alternative versions:
A. ENGULFMENT OR CONTAINMENT

1. Ponyplay (tight corsets or horse masks)
2. Crush Freaks (pressure from foot)
3. Fat admirers (smothering by lover)
4. Body inflation (pressure from inflating rubber suits)
5. Mudlarking and Quicksand (suction in heavy mud)
6. Sploshing (esp. full-coverage porridge or treacle)
7. Robots/dolls (full-body costumes)
8. Latex mask (full-face mask)
9. Fursuiters (full-body costumes)
10. Turkey Man (being shut inside oven)

B. RETURN TO CHILDHOOD

1. Ponyplay (childhood piggy-back rides)
2. Giantess fans (being tiny infant with giant adults)
3. Fat admirers (being pressed against Mommy's huge breasts)
4. Body inflation (kid's movies like Willy Wonka, breast-feeding)
5. Balloon Fetish (childhood toy, breastfeeding)
6. Mudlarking (playing with mud-pies)
7. Sploshing (playing with your food, shit-smearing)
8. Clowns (childlike humor)
9. Knicker-wetting and infamtilism (duh)
10. Fursuiters (make-believe and dress-up)
11. Robots (make-believe and dress-up)
12. Furries (childhood cartoon shows)

C. DOMINANCE AND SUBMISSION

Every single one of these fetishes and fantasies can incorporate dominance and submission scenarios.

D. FEAR

Every single one of these fetishes and fantasies can make use of fear and danger as a button-pusher for arousal.

― Sébastien Chikara (Sébastien Chikara), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 11:16 (twenty-one years ago)

tattooing scraggy saddam hussein's bearded face onto someone's minge and then have sex with them and pretend saddam hussein's giving you head at the same time.

― perversion of infinite justice (ken c), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 11:19 (twenty-one years ago)

Turkey Man?

― Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 11:37 (twenty-one years ago)

just paste this entire thread onto the laughing out loud circle jerk. rock sucking made me laugh the most until the saddam thing. genius.

― g-kit (g-kit), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 11:41 (twenty-one years ago)

Chingy Knickers

― mzui, Tuesday, 2 March 2004 11:54 (twenty-one years ago)

A man about to have BEE SEX...yesterday

http://www.hoppenfeld.com/Photo_Album/Graham/BeeKeeper/BeeKeeperSexy.JPG

― winterland, Tuesday, 2 March 2004 13:53 (twenty-one years ago)

more BEE SEX enthusiasts

http://www.donovansf.com/PastPartyPics/StarSaturdays-103102-BumbleBee.jpg

― winterland, Tuesday, 2 March 2004 13:55 (twenty-one years ago)

FAT BEES AND FEEDERS

― stevem (blueski), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 14:07 (twenty-one years ago)

pavement sex
(not the band)

― pete s, Tuesday, 2 March 2004 14:15 (twenty-one years ago)

stevem's hair

― stevem (blueski), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 14:17 (twenty-one years ago)

fence fetish!

― gaol clichy (clichy), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 14:18 (twenty-one years ago)

'stevem's hair'

unfortunately that's a real perversion

― pete s, Tuesday, 2 March 2004 14:19 (twenty-one years ago)

naval sex

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 14:54 (twenty-one years ago)

Hello sailor.

― Liz :x (Liz :x), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 15:05 (twenty-one years ago)

hi. fancy some bumsex whilst watching Sailor-Moon?

― sailor (ken c), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 15:12 (twenty-one years ago)

10. Turkey Man (being shut inside oven)

So Ally's roast chicken man wasn't even that original?

― j.lu (j.lu), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 15:16 (twenty-one years ago)

Oh wait I meant navel sex.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 15:17 (twenty-one years ago)

Fucking yourself in the bum with your own cock.

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 15:20 (twenty-one years ago)

If you get a cast done.....

― omg, Tuesday, 2 March 2004 15:21 (twenty-one years ago)

So that's why . . . . .

― Lynskey (Lynskey), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 15:23 (twenty-one years ago)

'mexican luchador mask sex'

oh, it's been done, just not documented

― Donna Brown (Donna Brown), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 15:28 (twenty-one years ago)

If you get a cast done.....

That isn't exactly your "own cock", is it?

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 15:29 (twenty-one years ago)

i thought the cast was for the bum.

― ken c (ken c), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 15:44 (twenty-one years ago)

Well, it's not your bum either.

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 15:46 (twenty-one years ago)

Tuomas, are you trying to show off?

― Markelby (Mark C), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 15:48 (twenty-one years ago)

no, it's nothing more than a replica.
a replicock, so to speak.

x-post

― dyson (dyson), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 15:49 (twenty-one years ago)

I think anything remotely phallic shaped has at least been attempted in this house
"house"

― dyson (dyson), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 15:51 (twenty-one years ago)

Arse Cider

― mzui, Tuesday, 2 March 2004 15:52 (twenty-one years ago)

'Arse Cider' and 'Fence Fetish' discounted for being 3rd and 4th on the bill at the Dublin Castle...

― winterland, Tuesday, 2 March 2004 16:52 (twenty-one years ago)

Boo!

― mzui, Tuesday, 2 March 2004 17:08 (twenty-one years ago)

severed midget head skullfucking

― ferg (Ferg), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 17:11 (twenty-one years ago)

Tequila bottles up the arse. Followed by handstands.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 17:11 (twenty-one years ago)

a common aerobics routine known as tequila bun rise.

― ken c (ken c), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 17:14 (twenty-one years ago)

Tequila bum rise in the UK

― winterland, Tuesday, 2 March 2004 17:15 (twenty-one years ago)

how about a fetish for extinct species.

that one would really suck to have.

― dyson (dyson), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 17:22 (twenty-one years ago)

haha dyson just said "really suck"

― ken c (ken c), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 17:24 (twenty-one years ago)

proverbial sucking.

― dyson (dyson), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 17:29 (twenty-one years ago)

Licking out the grooves on radiators when they're on medium heat. Add loganberry jam to taste.

― C J (C J), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 21:14 (twenty-one years ago)

Being barked at by doggers wearing velvet flares in a public car park while having sex on the bonnet of a light brown 1971 Morris Marina with Chicory Tip's 'Son Of My Father' playing on the radio in the background.

Stan Collymore was born in 1971.

― C J (C J), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 21:16 (twenty-one years ago)

tae kwon doe with a pole up your ass.

― latebloomer (latebloomer), Tuesday, 2 March 2004 22:57 (twenty-one years ago)

My god I forgot about the turkey basting story.

I refuse to tell the pope-a-roni story yet again but those people were fucked up.

― Allyzay, Wednesday, 3 March 2004 03:11 (twenty-one years ago)

Having to touch your genitals on every item in the supermarket before leaving.

― Clarke B. (Clarke B.), Wednesday, 3 March 2004 03:18 (twenty-one years ago)

A late surge by "licking out the grooves on radiators"...can it be possible that google images has NO hits for "radiator licking"...shame

― winterland, Wednesday, 3 March 2004 08:07 (twenty-one years ago)

five months pass...

Sex with a lubricated VCR while repeatedly pressing Eject?

Masturbating while sucking helium and singing nursery rhymes?

Sex with your head stuffed between cushions of a couch left on the curb for trash?

Plucking wild mushrooms from the forest floor, removing the stems and fucking the holes?

― Queen Electric Butt Prober BZZT!! BZZZZZT!! (Queen Electric Butt Prober BZZ), Monday, 16 August 2004 23:33 (twenty-one years ago)

that is all so 2002

― mookieproof (mookieproof), Monday, 16 August 2004 23:36 (twenty-one years ago)

Sex in a room full of (no less than 10) hungry cats ?

― Jay Vee (Manon_70), Tuesday, 17 August 2004 00:10 (twenty-one years ago)

Serious suggestion: acne/spots. I am quite surprised I can't find evidence that acne fetishists exist. It seems to me that it would be a perfect fetish, being both banal and wild: like hairy women, or small animals killed by high heels.

― Eyeball Kicks (Eyeball Kicks), Tuesday, 17 August 2004 21:49 (twenty-one years ago)

Daniel Clowes made a comic about an acne fetishist.

― Nemo (JND), Tuesday, 17 August 2004 21:53 (twenty-one years ago)

Tae Kwon Do with a pole up your ass.

― latebloomer (latebloomer), Tuesday, 17 August 2004 22:12 (twenty-one years ago)

stuffing your ass with dry ice to produce a london fog effect.

― michael bott, Tuesday, 17 August 2004 23:02 (twenty-one years ago)

xpost
clowes also did one about a kid fucking bugs.

the very first thing that popped into my head upon reading the thread title was bob odenkirk going "i like masturbating in closed rooms while waiting for pie to cool" or whatever it was in that one mr show sketch. one of the better ones.

― andrew m. (andrewmorgan), Wednesday, 18 August 2004 01:12 (twenty-one years ago)

the incredible, edible, pot roast.

― artdamages (artdamages), Wednesday, 18 August 2004 02:12 (twenty-one years ago)

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