"Why there will always be a need for men."

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It says here.

Without men, babies might be born as old as their mothers. Imagine what a great television drama that would make!

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 30 March 2004 23:59 (twenty-two years ago)

I really can't say thanks for bringing this article to my attention.

― Anthony Miccio (Anthony Miccio), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 00:01 (twenty-two years ago)

lies, lies!

― the surface noise (electricsound), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 00:02 (twenty-two years ago)

there's no need for men at all!!

― the surface noise (electricsound), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 00:03 (twenty-two years ago)

My mind has been semi-boggled.

― jim wentworth (wench), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 02:10 (twenty-two years ago)

'Why are babies born young?'

Yes! Also - why is a spade called a spade, and not, say, a horse?

The real reason men are necessary is, of course, to keep women from killing each other.

― the music mole (colin s barrow), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 02:18 (twenty-two years ago)

And to open pickle jars.

― Vitamin Leee (Leee), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 03:20 (twenty-two years ago)

In case we start getting scarce, Leee, tap the cover around its circumference with the handle of a butter knife, making the smallest of dents and that should loosen em up. Otherwise, just come and ask one of us brutes.

― jim wentworth (wench), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 03:39 (twenty-two years ago)

My hero!

― Vitamin Leee (Leee), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 03:49 (twenty-two years ago)

If there were no men, who would take out the dustbins and get rid of spiders for us?

― C J (C J), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 05:22 (twenty-two years ago)

damn, i've been ripped off! the man I live with makes me do both of those things

― ipsofacto (ipsofacto), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 05:23 (twenty-two years ago)

Another good reason for men: they go to the corner shop at 9pm and buy you chocolate and ice cream.

― the music mole (colin s barrow), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 05:27 (twenty-two years ago)

FYI -- men are good for killing cockroaches! And moving heavy furniture! And fixing drains that are acting up! And repairing faulty wiring! And putting up the outdoor Christmas lights!

(Sorry, there was a sale on exclamation points at the superstore today.)

(ipsofacto, that is a rip-off!)

― Many Coloured Halo (Dee the Lurker), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 05:29 (twenty-two years ago)

And for trapping and/or killing huntsman spiders. And for giving you backrubs. And telling you every day that no, you're not ugly, you're really beautiful.

― the music mole (colin s barrow), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 05:38 (twenty-two years ago)

oh stop it you guys, you're just rubbing in how neglected i've been!

― ipsofacto (ipsofacto), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 05:39 (twenty-two years ago)

Ask The Frogs

― donut bitch (donut), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 05:39 (twenty-two years ago)

And for giving you backrubs. And telling you every day that no, you're not ugly, you're really beautiful.

Hm. Strange. I've never had a man do that to/for me before.

― Many Coloured Halo (Dee the Lurker), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 05:41 (twenty-two years ago)

What, you mean I've been deceived?!

― the music mole (colin s barrow), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 05:42 (twenty-two years ago)

me neither. what men are these?

― ipsofacto (ipsofacto), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 05:42 (twenty-two years ago)

The quirkyalones, of course.

― miloauckerman (miloauckerman), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 05:46 (twenty-two years ago)

ahhhhh....of course!

― ipsofacto (ipsofacto), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 05:49 (twenty-two years ago)

Intelligent, sensitive, caring and emasculated.

― miloauckerman (miloauckerman), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 05:50 (twenty-two years ago)

So do any of you other guys stock your house with spiders just to ensure that you'll be needed?

― oops (Oops), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 06:02 (twenty-two years ago)

They come free with jars of hamisha pickles.

― Ed (dali), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 06:33 (twenty-two years ago)

"Grandma In The Corner With A Penis In Her Hand"

grandma sitting in the corner with a penis in her hand going no no no
it only goes to show
grandma in the corner with a penis in her hand going no no no
it only went to show
when the ambulance arrived there wasn't a cock alive
grandma in the corner with a penis in her hand going no no no no no
grandma in the corner with a be-hive in her hand going no no no no no
when the ambulance arrived today, ohhh the penises were playing in the hayyyyyy
grandma in the corner in the hand with a penis going no no no
the ambulance man saying no no no no no
grandma...grandma..grandma
i'm gonna wring the penis from your hands no no no no
grandma come on no no no no no
in the corner with your hands you run your hands from the penis

― donut bitch (donut), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 06:53 (twenty-two years ago)

by the Frogs

― donut bitch (donut), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 06:54 (twenty-two years ago)

FYI -- men are good for killing cockroaches! And moving heavy furniture! And fixing drains that are acting up! And repairing faulty wiring! And putting up the outdoor Christmas lights!

In the future robots will do all these tasks.

― Jarlr'mai (jarlrmai), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 08:14 (twenty-two years ago)

This thread took some odd turns.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 19:58 (twenty-two years ago)

except for the backrub, i do all of these things for myself.

so why are they here again?

― Ask For Samantha (thatgirl), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 20:02 (twenty-two years ago)

willies

― RJG (RJG), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 20:15 (twenty-two years ago)

Wet willies?

(shudder)

― Vitamin Leee (Leee), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 20:16 (twenty-two years ago)

it burns, otherwise.

― RJG (RJG), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 20:18 (twenty-two years ago)

dildos

― Ask For Samantha (thatgirl), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 20:19 (twenty-two years ago)

I haven't tried. are they just as good/better?

― RJG (RJG), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 20:21 (twenty-two years ago)

sometimes better

― Ask For Samantha (thatgirl), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 20:22 (twenty-two years ago)

or are you saying we'll need men to design/manufacture/package/despatch/sell dildos?

― RJG (RJG), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 20:22 (twenty-two years ago)

crosspost

sometimes better but always, at least, just as good?

― RJG (RJG), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 20:23 (twenty-two years ago)

if there were no men, who would earn the money?

― dean! (deangulberry), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 20:27 (twenty-two years ago)

whay are the funny ones not funny today?

― kephm, Wednesday, 31 March 2004 20:27 (twenty-two years ago)

Who would be in charge of the remote??

― Vitamin Leee (Leee), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 20:28 (twenty-two years ago)

all you need is sperm and one of these
http://img.epinions.com/images/opti/9a/e4/pr-Cooking_Tools-Oxo_Good_Grips_Turkey_Baster-resized200.jpg

― brg30 (brg30), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 20:31 (twenty-two years ago)

and a woman:

http://schweitzerhome.net/blog/art/turkey.jpg

― dean! (deangulberry), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 20:36 (twenty-two years ago)

In the future robots will do all these tasks.

It's the 21st century, where's my robot maid to do these things? *taps left foot* But I'd still like a good guy around, to give me backrubs and othersuch pleasures.

― j.lu (j.lu), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 20:51 (twenty-two years ago)

Each one, each time he has sex, makes enough sperm to fertilise every woman in Europe.

LOOK OUT EUROPE, I'M MASTURBATING TONIGHT!

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 20:58 (twenty-two years ago)

That's my problem! I'm not in Europe.

― donut bitch (donut), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 21:26 (twenty-two years ago)

(Too late, the VengaDan sperm army has already started instilling new governments as we speak)

― donut bitch (donut), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 21:26 (twenty-two years ago)

The VengaDan is coming.

― tokyo rosemary (rosemary), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 23:17 (twenty-two years ago)

Even odder turns now.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 1 April 2004 00:05 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm with you, Ned. It's like being asked to imagine Dan replacing Woody Allen in the sperm-suit in Everything You Wanted To Know About Sex...and then watching his evil army cover Europe.

― Barima (Barima), Thursday, 1 April 2004 00:13 (twenty-two years ago)

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