if you were Kim Il Jong, who would you kidnap to make movies ... and what sort of movies would you have them make?

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y'all know the story about Kim Il Jong, from before he became Glorious Leader of North Korea and was just the spoiled drunken son of Eternal Leader Kim Il Song? no? lemme tell yas ... Kim Il Jong kidnapped his favorite south korean film starlette and director, brought them to north korea, and had them make lots of war films about korean soldiers killing japanese soldiers. how cool is THAT shit?

anyway, who would YOU kidnap and what kind of movies would you have made?

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Thursday, 1 April 2004 01:32 (twenty-one years ago)

i would kidnap either david lynch, quentin tarantino or roman polanski. i would also kidnap patrick swayze and maggie gyllenhaal (sp)? and either gary numan, ralf und florian, or prince -- or maybe ALL of them (for the mandatory soundtrack).

they would make movies just like battlefield earth, only cooler and dumber ... lots of androids and lasers and patrick swayze with his resplendent mullet fighting off 20-foot aliens.

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Thursday, 1 April 2004 01:36 (twenty-one years ago)

I'd get Cronenberg to make a zombie movie staring David Bowie , Vin Diesel, and Alyson Hannigan!

― A Nairn (moretap), Thursday, 1 April 2004 01:51 (twenty-one years ago)

I would kidnap ILX and have them remake Under the Rainbow

― mookieproof (mookieproof), Thursday, 1 April 2004 01:55 (twenty-one years ago)

a flock of seagulls and peter jackson ... the film we'd make would be called killer clown sex from outer space!

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Thursday, 1 April 2004 02:16 (twenty-one years ago)

christina ricci and thora birch.. Feeders II: the largening

― the surface noise (electricsound), Thursday, 1 April 2004 02:28 (twenty-one years ago)

OH SNAP
FAT JOKES

― Kingfish Hypercolor (Kingfish), Thursday, 1 April 2004 03:00 (twenty-one years ago)

jokes? who's joking?

― the surface noise (electricsound), Thursday, 1 April 2004 03:16 (twenty-one years ago)

I would kidnap Shelley Winters (she's not dead or anything is she? If so, don't dare tell me or I'll have you executed!) and have her play the Liz Taylor role in "National Velvet." But I would rename it "International Velvet" and make Shelley wear purple contact lenses.

― Salmon Pink (Salmon Pink), Thursday, 1 April 2004 03:30 (twenty-one years ago)

the funny thing is that the director he kidnapped made the most successful north korean film ever, and then returned to south korea and said it was a piece of crap

― amateur!st (amateurist), Thursday, 1 April 2004 06:53 (twenty-one years ago)

i think it was some kind of godzilla ripoff with marxist overtones

― amateur!st (amateurist), Thursday, 1 April 2004 06:54 (twenty-one years ago)

http://images-eu.amazon.com/images/P/B00005OR57.02.LZZZZZZZ.jpg

― Girolamo Savonarola, Thursday, 1 April 2004 16:56 (twenty-one years ago)

what is the revelance of that crappy movie?

― amateur!st (amateurist), Thursday, 1 April 2004 17:51 (twenty-one years ago)

I would kidnap Ben Stiller and Owen Wilson, and have them make a buddy movie with huge amounts of gay subtext.

― Layna Andersen (Layna Andersen), Thursday, 1 April 2004 18:53 (twenty-one years ago)

I'd kidnap the Bush Twins and make them do pr0n, thus ensuring the health of the North Korean economy in the future.

― miloauckerman (miloauckerman), Thursday, 1 April 2004 20:22 (twenty-one years ago)

attack of the killer prawns!

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Thursday, 1 April 2004 23:40 (twenty-one years ago)

KILLER BUSH

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Thursday, 1 April 2004 23:40 (twenty-one years ago)

I would kidnap ILX and have them remake Under the Rainbow

Too tame. Think Lair of the White Worm.

― Nichole Graham (Nichole Graham), Thursday, 1 April 2004 23:46 (twenty-one years ago)

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