"I Can't Find the RIght Person!" and other complaints.

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What do you tell freinds who moan things like this at you ?

― Mike Hanle y, Thursday, 5 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Tell them to unplug the vacuum cleaner and consider introducing themselves to other people for a change.

― Ned Raggett, Thursday, 5 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Tend to avoid them, since there's not a lot to say. Life is a series of bad, good, and (mostly) neutral events; if someone wants to fixate on the former you can't stop them from doing so.

There's a reason psychiatrists charge $200 an hour to hear people bitch about random things, and it ain't just college loan payments...

― Chris, Thursday, 5 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Having dealt with a couple of friends like that in the past the best advice is suddenly become busy with other things when they want to hang out with you.

It sounds harsh, but it's necessary because there's really not a lot you can say to make them feel any better and by the end of the day they end up bringing you down with them. Keep in mind this doesn't apply to friends going through personal problems once in a while who need to vent, just to needy people who do nothing but complain and demand sympathy because of their personal circumstances.

― Nicole, Thursday, 5 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

I already tried some sort of half assed rational -emotive therapy but to no avail.

― Mike Hanle y, Thursday, 5 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

I can't find the right person. Is this where I go to complain?

― Otis Wheeler, Thursday, 5 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Well, I am usually the one who's always whining that I can't find the right person. But my main problems are (a) laziness; and (b) being fussy.

― Tadeusz Suchodolski, Thursday, 5 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Knowledge is power. Find out their problems and use the information to manipulate them. They'll develop something like Stockholm syndrome while you treat them like garbage, and when they finally figure out what's going on they'll be close to suicide and everyone will think you're great and they're crazy. Does anybody want to go out with me?

― tarden, Friday, 6 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Tell them to stop looking. If they become stronger more independant people they are more likely to find some one. Noone wants to be an emotional crutch. much better to come to a relationship as equals and base things on mutual support, no? I found people started being attracted to me when I developed a stronger, more independant, more individual personality. So tell them to stop worrying about relationships and start worrying about what they want out of life and working towards that. The rest may or may not fall into place later.

― Ed, Friday, 6 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Tell them to go to the Philipines. All the right people are in the Philipines. You can even buy them.

I think this is a case where looking at the problem logically can radically help someone to lower their standards. Instead of looking for the right person, identify the wrong people. Everyone else is - de facto - right. Suddenly the net has been spread wider.

― Pete, Friday, 6 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Gosh Pete, your logic is blinding. But I still won't shag you.

The problem is logic has no place in the wacky world of pulling. And it's all very well saying your friends moan about not finding the right person but I bet you bitch like hell when they find someone and you don't like them.

― Emma, Friday, 6 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Actually my logic is terrible as I daresay Josh will point out when he gets up (I assume he must have gone to bed by now). Your second point though is spot on. The number of single people I know who then get a sig other and those people who used to moan about being moaned at start moaning about how they are completely wrong for them.

Of cours ethe problem with being long term single is that when you do get into a relationship your Dawson's Creek-esque over analysis of the situation may make you fuck it up because you only think its special cos you have been out of the game for so long.

And Emma, if I wanted to shag you - I would. I am in control in our house. (Subliminal hint to vote Paul).

― Pete, Friday, 6 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Good point - what was that number again?

Please do not use this forum to threaten rape, it isn't nice.

― Emma, Friday, 6 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

so you've got a friend who feels like this, and they moan a bit. well, big deal! they yr friends aren't they?

― gareth, Friday, 6 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Supraliminal command: vote PAUL!!

― mark s, Friday, 6 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Damn, forgot to add the emoticon which would have made everthing alright. I fear everyone is viewing me with suspicion now. I'll get me coat (actually a grubby mac).

― Pete, Friday, 6 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

McCartney?

― the pinefox, Friday, 6 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Is he standing for election for something? No, Paul from BB2.

Rest assured that I could fight Pete off even if he was armed with a chair and I had consumed 15 orange Bacardi Breezers. Assuming he hasn't got hold of rohypronol (sp?) again.

― Emma, Friday, 6 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Damn that date rape drug. I didn't realise I had to have a date first.

And Emma, why so coy. I'm sure you could learn to love me.

― Pete, Friday, 6 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Pete, I have learned many things in my time e.g. how to make white sauce, driving, medieval French literature, how to change a light bulb, how to avoid smudging nail varnish.

But I will not ever learn to love you. Soz.

― Emma, Friday, 6 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Want the truth droogies? I feel like telling person " It's because you are a peice of crap! Of course n o one loves you ! Obviously! Your crotch and breath smell! You are wishy washy! arrgh!

― Mike Hanle y, Friday, 6 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

My crotch and breath don't smell. Or at least I think they smell nice. And I'm certainly not wishy wasy. (if I was washy my crotch definately wouldn't smell).

― Pete, Friday, 6 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

I shall be the judge of that, Pete. One man's heavenly crotch whiff is another man's hellish "Satan's cock" fume.

― Mike Hanle y, Friday, 6 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

If a person is willing to DO SOMETHING about the situation about which they are complaining, then I will listen almost endlessly. But if you want to bitch about something which you are not prepared to do anything about, then you lose the right to complain.

― masonic boom, Friday, 6 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

What is all this bad-mouthing of "Satan's Cock" that I keep hearing? What has Satan's Cock ever done that deserves such ridicule?

― tOM P, Friday, 6 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Satan's cock spilt its' hell on me.

― Mike Hanley, Sunday, 8 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

two years pass...

Back to the original question, why not use it as an excuse to make your own complaints? That's what I do, anyway.

― N. (nickdastoor), Saturday, 12 July 2003 17:17 (twenty-one years ago) link

maybe the right person cannot find you. and why do you think that is?

― lafayette penoril (Mary), Saturday, 12 July 2003 17:27 (twenty-one years ago) link

because you hide behind aliases?

― Mary (Mary), Saturday, 12 July 2003 18:05 (twenty-one years ago) link

Damn! I *did* go out with you!

― Orbit (Orbit), Sunday, 13 July 2003 00:54 (twenty-one years ago) link

But lafayette isn't the one complaining!

― N. (nickdastoor), Monday, 14 July 2003 21:28 (twenty-one years ago) link

maybe it isn't a complaint. maybe they are gloating.

― di smith (lucylurex), Monday, 14 July 2003 21:32 (twenty-one years ago) link

Lafayette Penoril is so dreamy.

― Mary (Mary), Monday, 14 July 2003 21:35 (twenty-one years ago) link

I like di's take on it.

― N. (nickdastoor), Monday, 14 July 2003 21:37 (twenty-one years ago) link

Tell there there is no right person and then push them off of a tall building.

― Anthem of the Snake (Anthem of the Snake), Tuesday, 15 July 2003 01:02 (twenty-one years ago) link

Damn, I was a bitch back then. These days I am practicing my Smug Married patronising smile and saying things like "Don't worry dear, every pot finds its cover" and then I bore them with a ten minute gush session about how wonderful HSA is. :-)

― kate (kate), Tuesday, 15 July 2003 13:46 (twenty-one years ago) link

One man's heavenly crotch whiff is another man's hellish "Satan's cock" fume.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 15 July 2003 13:48 (twenty-one years ago) link

Then we all find out Hanle y's friend is actually his mom and she said "I can't find the right purse, son!"

― donut bitch (donut), Tuesday, 15 July 2003 18:33 (twenty-one years ago) link

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