Greatest Hits: Your Random Public Mutterings

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Because you're excited, depressed, giddy, insane, whatever! Extra points if people stared!

Feeling:

Musical, happy - "Chk-Chk-Chk-DUNH-Chk-Chk-Chk!" (with dancing)

Embarrassed, guilty, sarcastic - "Well today was a hit."

Panicky and indecisive in video store - "Cmon baby, gimme that newness"

― LC, Monday, 10 May 2004 11:02 (twenty-two years ago)

An example of Insane:

I was once taking a streetcar through Chinatown in Toronto. I was feeling a little out of it, and the streetcar was packed with people. I guess my internal monologue got switched to "external", 'cos after catching a glimpse of this bizarrely customized Honda Civic (huge spoiler, ridiculous rims/lo-pros, paintjob, etc) I exclaimed "THAT'S CRAZY! That's just crazy." much to the bemusement of those around me.

― Rob Bolton (Rob Bolton), Monday, 10 May 2004 11:05 (twenty-two years ago)

I was trying to calm myself down while i was walking down the street and i said 'be cool' out loud and a guy looks up at me and says 'ayyyyyyyyyyy' like the fonz

― Nellie (nellskies), Tuesday, 11 May 2004 07:25 (twenty-two years ago)

First thing in the morning I have very little control over my verbal reactions to annoyances. Thus, when I find that my crazy flatmate has once again moved the bathmat out of the bathroom or flung my towels in a corner, I whisper viciously, "stupid cow" or similar and stomp around moodily. Likewise, when I actually make it out of the door, I have to cross a fairly busy road to get to the bus-stop, and I'm sure everyone already over there really enjoys me yelling, "stop, you fuckers, let me over!" at the traffic. As if the drivers can hear me.

― Liz :x (Liz :x), Tuesday, 11 May 2004 07:39 (twenty-two years ago)

Driving past some cyclists on a road trip in Colorado, yelling "work it! Feel the burn! Master your ass!"

― Markelby (Mark C), Tuesday, 11 May 2004 10:07 (twenty-two years ago)

Just before my wife gave birth, we're in the hospital walking up to deliveries. This is 3 o clock in the morning. My head is playing the Fall record I like at that point.

Then I suddenly sing under my breath: "I'm a mummeah!"
Dawn : "Pardon?"
Mark: "nothing."

― mark grout (mark grout), Tuesday, 11 May 2004 10:10 (twenty-two years ago)

(I can't resist adding a PS to Markelby. We were driving up a steep hill and Mark failed to realize that the back window was open while he was doing his very loud shouting at the cyclists. Cue sheepishness and my loud laughter.)

― sgs (sgs), Tuesday, 11 May 2004 10:20 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm working and singing along to Negativland and taking some books outside to put on the sale rack..."COMMUNISM IS GOOOOOD!" Unfortunately, there is a bus stop right outside the store. Everybody stops waiting for the bus and looks at me, because I am the crazy lady at the bus stop. Sigh

― Morley Timmons (Donna Brown), Tuesday, 11 May 2004 19:34 (twenty-two years ago)

to myself, today, walking by Ground Zero and witnessing a girl with a Bush/Cheney campaign hat: "holy fucking shit!"

― hstencil (hstencil), Tuesday, 11 May 2004 19:35 (twenty-two years ago)

Having just drunkenly pissed on an alley wall, I look down at my shoes and mutter, "Next time don't stand so close to the fucking wall," just as a posse of women amble by.

― mookieproof (mookieproof), Tuesday, 11 May 2004 19:40 (twenty-two years ago)

I once heard a guy at a barbeque in Dublin, looking absently at the rosy sunset, murmur dreamily to himself: "...vagina-pink clouds..."

― Conor (Conor), Tuesday, 11 May 2004 20:08 (twenty-two years ago)

In school, bored and staring at the girls in my class: "Mmmm... boobies".

― dog latin (dog latin), Wednesday, 12 May 2004 10:52 (twenty-two years ago)

usually just the word "motherfuckers" with increasing volume & disbelief

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Wednesday, 12 May 2004 11:46 (twenty-two years ago)

When I was 13 or so I had some Fisher Price tape recorder thing, and one day I decided to record myself saying all the bad words I knew, especially if they were about girls' bits. This I did, behind a closed door, whispering - but somehow my mum heard me and made me wipe the tape "in case your little brother finds it".

― Markelby (Mark C), Wednesday, 12 May 2004 11:48 (twenty-two years ago)

Mark, can I use that in a story?

― kirsten (kirsten), Wednesday, 12 May 2004 17:12 (twenty-two years ago)

On a flight to Taiwan aged 5, when the plane dipped and I got that funny feeling I exclaimed: "Ooooh! That tickles my rooster!"

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Wednesday, 12 May 2004 17:14 (twenty-two years ago)

"I like bananas okay, but don't you hate how they make your throat swell up and make it difficult to breathe?"

Of course, after the response I got to this, I realized that this is *not* a normal reaction to bananas and that I am -- in fact -- allergic to bananas.

― Evanston Wade (EWW), Wednesday, 12 May 2004 17:15 (twenty-two years ago)

I was at Amoeba and found this Ellen Allien CD I'd been looking for, very cheap and used. for some reason I said "excelsior!" out loud and this girl looked at me funny.

― Gear! (Gear!), Wednesday, 12 May 2004 17:16 (twenty-two years ago)

In a politics lesson, rapping the Beasties' 'Eggman' to myself.

Me, slightly louder than necessary: I throw it at a sucker/K-pap

Politics tutor: No, not a kebab, Barima.

― Barima (Barima), Wednesday, 12 May 2004 17:16 (twenty-two years ago)

Kirsten, sure thing.

― Markelby (Mark C), Thursday, 13 May 2004 11:57 (twenty-two years ago)

Five years old at a playing pool. Little kid wanders over and wants to play. I look at him and shout "WORKTOP, WORKTOP, WORKTOP"

― Mikey G (Mikey G), Thursday, 13 May 2004 12:35 (twenty-two years ago)

(the days before Laptops presumably)

― mark grout (mark grout), Thursday, 13 May 2004 12:36 (twenty-two years ago)

ha ha, me too, John!

― tokyo rosemary (rosemary), Thursday, 13 May 2004 13:02 (twenty-two years ago)

Mikey is responsible for the funniest one of these I ever heard....

"g g I am the G for I am he, the g g g"

did you think anyone was in the house dude?

― chris (chris), Thursday, 13 May 2004 13:21 (twenty-two years ago)

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