ideas requires for frantic individual whose no-where to live and no work

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okay, i have to pay the final months rent for my deposit. i've just finished university, and the official end date is in july, which is the date from which i am eligible for jobseekers allowance and housing benefit.

the first complication is that i do not have anywhere to live from july the 8th, and no money.
the second complication is that i have some very important, and nameless, business to to do, which largely involves hanging out. this consequently discounts me from being able to get a job and earn any money.

what course of action ought i to take?

― matthew james (matthew james), Friday, 4 June 2004 22:16 (twenty years ago) link

it's your nowhere to live and no work.

I can't help, sorry. good luck.

― RJG (RJG), Friday, 4 June 2004 22:28 (twenty years ago) link

Move back with your parents?

RJG, I can't believe, you called out his grammar, and then wished him luck.

― Sick Mouthy (Nick Southall), Friday, 4 June 2004 22:34 (twenty years ago) link

Plus it's "who has" or "who's", not 'whose'.

― Sick Mouthy (Nick Southall), Friday, 4 June 2004 22:35 (twenty years ago) link

i have been smoking lots of pot.

― matthew james (matthew james), Friday, 4 June 2004 23:16 (twenty years ago) link

plus means what?

― RJG (RJG), Friday, 4 June 2004 23:19 (twenty years ago) link

moving back with my parents is not a sensible option. i need plans that are perhaps devious or absurd but ultimately workable. george costanza would be of help.

― matthew james (matthew james), Friday, 4 June 2004 23:22 (twenty years ago) link

george says move back in with your parents.

― RJG (RJG), Friday, 4 June 2004 23:27 (twenty years ago) link

i was goin more along the lines of faking disability., though preferably something not involving trickly moral negotiating.

― matthew james (matthew james), Saturday, 5 June 2004 00:26 (twenty years ago) link

dear matthew james:

i am in a position vaguely similar to yours. i suggest we collaborate, cutting our marijuana costs in HALF.

sincerely,
Ian Johnson

― Ian Johnson (orion), Saturday, 5 June 2004 00:57 (twenty years ago) link

http://www.planetquake.com/polycount/skins/quake3/tim/george/george-f.jpg

― Jordan (Jordan), Saturday, 5 June 2004 01:03 (twenty years ago) link

i have been smoking other people's marijuana, which helps, given these outrageous london prices.
if only there were some ways to combine dealing with marijuana and working at once.

― matthew james (matthew james), Saturday, 5 June 2004 01:06 (twenty years ago) link

sell pot if you have the a market!

― Ian Johnson (orion), Saturday, 5 June 2004 01:08 (twenty years ago) link

i'm conspicopus, lazy, i can't spot things right in front of me or remember half of what i did in the last week - i think i may have a career! everyone's friendly with those sorts in the drug world! they watch the back of my kind!

i did briefly consider being a crouper bit they wouldn't take me on. i can work but am very sensitive as to what i'm doing, andf become unhappy, embittered and edgy given the wrong circumstances.

― matthew james (matthew james), Saturday, 5 June 2004 01:27 (twenty years ago) link

croupier, not crouper, that probably doesn't mean anything.

― matthew james (matthew james), Saturday, 5 June 2004 01:29 (twenty years ago) link

i can work but am very sensitive as to what i'm doing, andf become unhappy, embittered and edgy given the wrong circumstances.

Well, that describes all of us, doesn't it?

I have to wonder what the very important, yet nameless business could be.

― Layna Andersen (Layna Andersen), Saturday, 5 June 2004 03:40 (twenty years ago) link

... have been smoking lots of pot.

that's prolly it.

― t\'\'t (t\'\'t), Saturday, 5 June 2004 07:44 (twenty years ago) link

when i get a job i feel like other people do when they get divorced or something.

― matthew james (matthew james), Saturday, 5 June 2004 11:21 (twenty years ago) link

Get out of London. It's a shit hole. Move somewhere, anywhere else - where people are nice and maybe sympathetic to your situation. Jobseekers won't help with your current ploy. More than likely - if you are homeless - you'll be put on a housing list which will take forever (more so in London). You'll either need to move in with your parents and apply for your lousy Jobseekers ("I've got a degree" - "Oh really? So has every other schmuck and his dog since university opened to anyone who can count to 10. It's the government's way of 'hiding *koff* I mean stopping unemployment figures from rising"). Getting a job in the graduate market, that does not involve working n a call centre, is between slim and nonexistent. Ultimately you could leave this fucking absymal country and chase your dreams elsewhere.

― C-Man (C-Man), Saturday, 5 June 2004 12:32 (twenty years ago) link

chill, brah

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Saturday, 5 June 2004 13:51 (twenty years ago) link

c-ma,, i adore this country! the lights behind liverpool street station at night, temperate summers, harsh and bracing winters, and all my friends are here. it's easy to steal bottles of whisky from marks and spencers food only. i will not work in a call centre. i will stay in an office for a week and then hang out the next, that is possible, that is the beauty of this. if you have wit and initiative and are neither proud of poverty nor afraid of it, and enjoy having no idea what will be happening within the next four hours and are not worried about that fact, then the city is yours for the taken. naturally there is sadness and frustration, but that must be seen in the bigger picture.
plus where do i go? i will not move back to batley, west yorkshire where exclusive Spar Shop wines cost £4.50 because no-one buys it.

― matthew james (matthew james), Saturday, 5 June 2004 16:48 (twenty years ago) link

Then that's up to you. You asked for advice and I gave it. Come to me in a few years time when your degree has gotten you squat.

(Alternately, die your hair blonde and grow breasts. The film and television industry will have a place for you somewhere. Knowledge and intelligence are both optional).

― C-Man (C-Man), Saturday, 5 June 2004 16:52 (twenty years ago) link

also - there are a thousand wonderful places to live in london which only take south african/kiwi.aussie folks. they com over here... naturally i have no grievence with any ethnicity but it does aggrieve me that they can walk into a sweeter deal that i can. it's a new old boys network.

http://www.thegumtree.com/cgi-bin/frame.pl?content_url=http%3A//www.thegumtree.com/london/12/778712.html

also i did not do my degree because i would gain financial reward for it. i did it to hang out for three years, which i did with gusto.

― matthew james (matthew james), Saturday, 5 June 2004 16:56 (twenty years ago) link

And that's the fucking problem with university. It lets in any old fucker. I despise those who go there to smoke dope and hang out and come out with some mickey mouse degree because it hurts those of us who went there and studied and got a good degree and learned something from it. And now want to reap the rewards.

― C-Man (C-Man), Saturday, 5 June 2004 17:01 (twenty years ago) link

don't listen to george. he gets it wrong always.

― cozen (Cozen), Saturday, 5 June 2004 17:01 (twenty years ago) link

c-ma, i have a very delicate understanding and tendancies. and frankly, i agree that i sdhould not have been let into university, or even the former politechnic i was at, because i learned absolutely nothing. all i did was read a novel and write about them in an offensive and unacademic fashion. but surely if the government will provide the funds then it is our responsibility to reap any reward that comes?
by which i mean, every important thing i have learned in my life i have learned whilst profoundly drunk. i did not enjoy all these lessons. but the grand impulse that results of that is a complete disregard for financial matters beyond that which is absoluely necasarry. £2.70 a pint! have at you! they don't check your bags where i go, so i go with a 6-pack of stella artois and fill in the toilets. we all learned different lessons, my friend, and we all learned to the absolute limits of our talents, because it is not in us to do any more or any less.

― matthew james (matthew james), Saturday, 5 June 2004 17:10 (twenty years ago) link

Close down all former polys is what I say. University should be for people who can and will learn from it.

― C-Man (C-Man), Saturday, 5 June 2004 17:12 (twenty years ago) link

i don't know if university life completely prejudiced you from reading between the lines, understanding abstract concepts and multiple layers of meaning and understanding, but i attempted to suggest that i learned something very valuable from university. leonard cohen achievced average grades and wom literature prizes. i never entered any literature prizes, but did achieve average grades.

― matthew james (matthew james), Saturday, 5 June 2004 17:21 (twenty years ago) link

You can get this kind of "experience" from anywhere. You've wated the time of people who go to university for proper, educational gain. Former polys attract this sort of attitude, but Tony insists on opening more so that those who would normally be signing on can go and doss about for three years and get a degree. What the fuckhead doesn't see is how damaging this has been to those of us who have a good degree and want to use it. We're in competition with thousands of morons. Very damaging.

― C-Man (C-Man), Saturday, 5 June 2004 18:27 (twenty years ago) link

firstly i flatly deny that i'm a moron.
secondly, i don't think you can hang out as effectively on any budget as much as a student loan budget. i'm grateful for one or two things i was intoroduced to during my time at university but i had no real desire to act within all the academic contrictions because that's not really the way tings work for me.
obviously, if you're going in for that natural history museum administrator job yo're so clearly hankering for then your first will mark you down as being able and willing to tow the line wilst giving your work a sheen of originality and initiative, which is fine, because then everyone is largely happy. yo're an administrator and i'm still spending most of my time hanging out.
also, name one specific way that i've wasted someone's time. (i'm not saying i haven't, i'm just intrigued as to specifically how you think i've wasted someone's time.)

― matthew james (matthew james), Saturday, 5 June 2004 18:46 (twenty years ago) link

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