also:

dear anyone who was camping not with us in the new bands field last night, i apologise on behalf of my very loud friends.

fuck gazebos though, they're shit.

http://www.dpi.qld.gov.au/pigs/4543.html !!!

Boar mating problems:
Serving into the rectum instead of the vagina. Supervision and assistance may be needed. Cull boars that never learn.

http://www.lifestyleblock.co.nz/articles/592_breeding_cycle_male.htm

sorry.

Porky must be one stupid son of a sow if he thinks that contraption looks anything like a dummy pig

sorry i couldn't meet up with everyone all the time i kept passing out drunk/being at the other side of glastonbury andor stage/needing to go to the bloody orange tent to charge my phone. i was a drunken recluse.

"Thank you...thanks to...most of you..."

Whatever woke me up on the New stage every morning
The Rub
Naomi Klein and Tony Benn
Plaid
Squarepusher
NOT DJ AFX (cos he never turns up anyway bastard)
The fucking excellent techno, d'n'b, electro that got played on the after hours soundsystems. Particularly the d'n'b they played on the Innerfield stage early Saturday morning and especially the banging shit coming out of the Red Toad stall next to the Radio 1 stage at about 4am on Monday morning.

i think Basement Jaxx and Scissor Sisters were my highlights. Orbital and the Chems were kinda anti-climactic really.

(yes and no - they played their version of the 2 Many DJs bootleg of 'Romeo' acapella with the music from The Clash's 'Magnificent Seven' - much to the distaste of, it seems, EVERYONE here except me cos i think it's fine really although i was happy with most of the 'Romeo' bootlegs inc. my shoddy own)

morrissey did amazingly well, i thought - i expected him to go down quite badly, but everyone seemed really into it. it was maybe better than the rfh gig a couple of weeks ago (still no shoplifters though, grrr).

PIKEY CLOTHING STALL REPRAZENT!

morrissey was pretty good, but he seemed to get increasingly pissed off as the show went on, i think he may have been having monitor problems.

my top five musical moments:

1. sleep the clock around - belle and sebastian
2. there is a light that never goes out - moz
3. take me out - franz ferdinand
4. soul to soul playing all the hits
5. orbital, just all of it.

Orbital, obviously. I didn't find it anticlimactic in the slighest and I wasn't especially bothered that nothing was mixed in but hearing Chime, Impact, Satan, Remind and Belfast played out for the last time (and You Lot for the first time) was magical.

Basement Jaxx's alternate version of Living Room, with that nagging 'nah nah nah' bit STILL sticks in my head despite me having been utterly bollocksed at the time. This is about as ringing an endorsement as you could ask for.

The moment the England equaliser went in, and myself, Dastoor, Ronan and Rob B all kind of jumped on top of one another, clattered over and ended up rolling in the mud. The bit immediately following that kind of harshed my buzz though.

Save A Horse, Ride A Cowboy! British men can't grind! Dancing outside a wine bar to Anarchy In The UK, in the mud, while being filmed! The worst bootleg ever made! Strawberry grog! Tom's muddy Damascene conversion! Television in a half-empty tent! Senegalese rappers! Thrash-punk Proclaimers covers in the Avalon field!

I actually think Sunday at Glasto was the best day I've ever had at a festival. It was like ricocheting from joy to joy, and coming back on Sunday night to find you lot all going mental round the tape player was the icing on the cake. I love you guys.

i am very busy right now, but thought i'd just pop in to say hi.

hi

The Darkness sample in Halcyon wrong-footed me altogether. But it brought the surprise back to a very old joke indeed.

where the phrase seems to come from (not particularly work safe):
http://excaliburfilms.com/AdultDVD/dvd_204820D1.htm

tom's birthday present for next year sorted out:
http://www.wiztees.com/savhorridcow.html

My festival was kinda weird. Lots of walking around, and spent lot of time hanging at the campsite with our wicked chilled out neighbors who had a big tarp to sit under. I swear they just stayed at their tents the whole time smoking weed. Although they did get up to go see Squarepusher...

My music highlights: Basement Jaxx defintely. Orbital blew my mind (the mushrooms I ate may have helped), Walkmen in the New Bands, Krafty Kuts in the Glade, being dry in the acoustic tent during the crazy rain on Sunday to see the guys from Ocean Colour Scene (laugh all you like - I thought they were great), Goldfrapp, the Opera, Chemical Brothers (who I didn't expect to enjoy), catching some of Billy Bragg unexpectedly... other stuff I've already forgotten. Like last year, I spent a surprising amount of time in the Glade dancin my ass off like the old man raver i am... I didn't see anything on the Pyramid stage except footie, the Opera and Wilco. Disappointed I didn't see B&S (although I'm seeing them at Somerset house in July), Moz and James Brown. C'est la vie.

ILXor highlights: running into Tom and Pete outside the wine bar when they were completely arseholed, seeing Ken C briefly during Basement Jaxx (I think), finally meeting Ronan, the pile-on during the footie, the big meeting outside the brothers bar, watching Matt DC have his first ever Chai tea and get hooked...

Other random highlights: dancing outside the wine bar (of course), trying (and loving) my first-ever pear cider, some crazy Aussie juggling dude in the Circus tent, the Tiny Tea Tent in the Greenfields (most of the Greenfields for that matter), the MASSIVE awesome veggie lunch I had at Queen Delilah, eating a vegetable pakora - the only food grown and eaten on-site in the little secret garden area off the main railroad track ('small world', I think), the comfort and view from that 'Common Ground' place near the acoustic tent, catching a quick nap by myself in the sun shortly thereafter, the 'secret sink' near the Glade with no cues for hand-washing, and best of all: THE CLASSIC ARCADE GAME TENT POWERED SOLELY BY CHIP FAT! I played Asteroids and a table-top Pac-Man (Space Invaders was busy).

Sod the mud, it was a great time. Good to see lots of you there - I hope you all enjoyed it too...

thankyou Matt, thankyou very much

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha [deep breath] hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha [will that do?]

also DO NOT GO TO COMMON GROUND, they are scary scary evangelical types who can't even spell speech.

which reminds me, stuart lee in the cabaret tent was aces, about two minutes in to his set all the electricity went and he did about half his set through a megaphone.

(i don't know what the joke is)

i had forgotten about this until now. i don't know the answer though. presumably it was on either alan's or tom's tapes?

Basement Jaxx were good though.. and also singing along to "Hey Jude" like a drunken loon later on.

stuart lee was indeed great.

As such, I will not hear a word against her. Desist immediately, my man.

I am the George Bush of this thread. The terrorists will not win.

THE SARAH VERDICT SAYS: she looks like another chick from Hollyoaks, harmless but none the less Yours.

(I actually support this)

i've finally got my pictures up, hope they work. no clever captions, i'm too lazy. if i get really really bored this week i may add them later. enjoy!

IT HAS ME IN IT OMG!

Although 940 is fab too.. wish my camera takes stage photos as good!

I was the victim of a vicious and premeditated assault.
-- Matt DC (runmd...), July 19th, 2004 1:20 PM. (later)

bukkake?

GLASTONBURY!

ARE YOU ALIVE?!!

That was fucking brilliant. All of it. I had totally forgotten how utterly incredible that festival can be when the sun is shining and you don't have to wade through shit and pissing rain to get anywhere. Just a lovely chilled out atmosphere on Saturday and Sunday, and even the bits when it rained were pretty light.

And what mud there was dried out everywhere by Saturday morning. Thank fuck for that. I can't believe I considered not going this year.

Will post more in a bit more detail later. But, essentially, I love Glastonbury again, and judging by the atmosphere everyone who was there agrees.

I ain't gonna front, I haven't been to Glastonbury.

what matt said. a vintage year indeed. pretty bloody ruined now though.