Do you ever feel you're being ignored?

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Have you ever felt you've been sent to Coventry and really don't know why?

It's a bit shitty.

― Penelope_111 (Penelope_111), Friday, 3 September 2004 15:31 (twenty years ago)

Coventry?

I know it was bombed a lot and all, but is it really that bad a place?

― Super-Masonic Black Hole (kate), Friday, 3 September 2004 15:34 (twenty years ago)

I read it in the Bunty annual. The four Marys did it a lot.

― Penelope_111 (Penelope_111), Friday, 3 September 2004 15:35 (twenty years ago)

I guess it's easy to feel ignored sometimes. I think it's the kind of thing that is easily imagined more than it is an actual real conspiracy.

― jel -- (jel), Friday, 3 September 2004 15:37 (twenty years ago)

This sounds like a pathetic plea for attention.

Please ignore.

Ha!

― Penelope_111 (Penelope_111), Friday, 3 September 2004 15:38 (twenty years ago)

Being ignored is like my ultimate number one pet peeve. It pisses me off probably more than anything else. It's kinda ridiculous.

― n/a (Nick A.), Friday, 3 September 2004 15:38 (twenty years ago)

Who's ignoring you, Pen? Have you (inadvertently) done something which might have upset the person concerned?

― C J (C J), Friday, 3 September 2004 15:39 (twenty years ago)

I often feel a bit ignored.

If you feel like you're being ignored, you probably are. And yeah, it's shitty.

Except on the internet. Well, maybe people are ignoring you, but I doubt it's personal. I don't know.

I'm too tired to know anything right now.

― Super-Masonic Black Hole (kate), Friday, 3 September 2004 15:40 (twenty years ago)

Sometimes we run for cover...

― R.I.M.A. (Barima), Friday, 3 September 2004 15:41 (twenty years ago)

I WILL NOT BE IGNORED!

― hstencil (hstencil), Friday, 3 September 2004 15:41 (twenty years ago)

It's OK, thanks CJ, I feel a bit silly now posting this.

― Penelope_111 (Penelope_111), Friday, 3 September 2004 15:41 (twenty years ago)

A lot of the time it's just paranoia, but sometimes it's not.

I used to feel *really* ignored quite a lot towards the end of my last relationship. It was a bad sign. :-(

― Super-Masonic Black Hole (kate), Friday, 3 September 2004 15:42 (twenty years ago)

Being ignored is the kind of thing I associate with kids, coz you have to say "I'm ignoring you" otherwise they might'nt ever know, and when you're 28 that would just sound lame.

― jel -- (jel), Friday, 3 September 2004 15:42 (twenty years ago)

Yeah, that deaf ears thing adults do is the cutting edge of hip.

― R.I.M.A. (Barima), Friday, 3 September 2004 15:44 (twenty years ago)

It's my own fault really. I can be a bit of a bitch. I'm getting kinda tired of being a pseudo misanthrope. It's hard work and it now seems infinitely easier to be nice. Less hassle anyway.

"bit of a"

― Penelope_111 (Penelope_111), Friday, 3 September 2004 15:47 (twenty years ago)

Incidentally, Jel. You're one of the nicest, sweetest people on this forum.

There.

― Penelope_111 (Penelope_111), Friday, 3 September 2004 15:51 (twenty years ago)

jel is my hero.

― hstencil (hstencil), Friday, 3 September 2004 15:54 (twenty years ago)

Incidentally, Jel. You're one of the nicest, sweetest people on this forum.

Astoundingly true!

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 3 September 2004 15:56 (twenty years ago)

i feel ignored a lot. it's what drives me to do what i do.

― the neurotic awakening of s (blueski), Friday, 3 September 2004 15:57 (twenty years ago)

e.g. dancing naked on tables

― ken c (ken c), Friday, 3 September 2004 16:02 (twenty years ago)

Yeah, its pretty childish at the best of times but its really shitty when it happens to you. Problem is when people are ignoring you there's this huge urge to try and make them notice, or respond, or whatever - its probably better to resist this.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Friday, 3 September 2004 16:07 (twenty years ago)

but not to stop trying, or you can become too timid/quiet and then ignored even more.

― ken c (ken c), Friday, 3 September 2004 16:08 (twenty years ago)

Dunno - is there a difference between being ignored and overlooked?

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Friday, 3 September 2004 16:10 (twenty years ago)

I assume if you're being overlooked, your presence isn't even known. If you're being ignore, your presence IS known, but no one gives a monkey's ass.

― Je4nne ƒury (Jeanne Fury), Friday, 3 September 2004 16:12 (twenty years ago)

i guess the net result is the same.

― ken c (ken c), Friday, 3 September 2004 16:14 (twenty years ago)

Yes, Matt, Jeanne's right about the difference.

― Penelope_111 (Penelope_111), Friday, 3 September 2004 16:14 (twenty years ago)

it's better to have spoke and ignore than to have never not been overlooked at all. or something

― ken c (ken c), Friday, 3 September 2004 16:15 (twenty years ago)

-ignore +ignored

― ken c (ken c), Friday, 3 September 2004 16:15 (twenty years ago)

(ignore me)

― ken c (ken c), Friday, 3 September 2004 16:15 (twenty years ago)

ignore who?

― luna (luna.c), Friday, 3 September 2004 16:18 (twenty years ago)

Is there an echo in here?

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 3 September 2004 16:34 (twenty years ago)

I often feel like I'm being ignored. I estimate I'm genuinely being ignored about half of the times that I think I am; the rest is just paranoia.

― caitlin (caitlin), Friday, 3 September 2004 16:57 (twenty years ago)

Blimey! :) Thanks!!!!

― jel -- (jel), Friday, 3 September 2004 16:58 (twenty years ago)

I think I'm overlooked more than ignored. This does make me the world's foremost 6'2" black, unstealthy, massive ninja master.

― Sean Bateman (Barima), Friday, 3 September 2004 17:07 (twenty years ago)

[Long very personal post deleted at Penelope's request - Martin Skidmore]

― Penelope_111 (Penelope_111), Saturday, 4 September 2004 10:07 (twenty years ago)

I now feel like a total arse for having written this to a bunch of strangers.

― Penelope_111 (Penelope_111), Saturday, 4 September 2004 10:20 (twenty years ago)

that's some pretty heavy stuff to go through, don't beat yourself up for getting some of it out on here.
Better to get it out than brew it up.

I wish I had some sage advice or fabulous 'something' to say to you, but the best I can come up with is that I can sort of relate, having been through a vaguely similar thing with my ex's family, and it most surely is a very lonely place to be.
Something said to me at that time was to just hold onto my 'self-belief' no matter what. You know you did what was right for you, keep doing it and stay focussed on your road ahead.
Good to hear you have a supportive partner.
hang in there :-)

― donna (donna), Saturday, 4 September 2004 10:53 (twenty years ago)

You don't need to feel like an arse - sometimes strangers are the best people to talk to about things like this, and ILE is almost always good in these situations. I don't know the ins and outs of your relationship with your friends but from the family point of view you haven't done anything wrong.

It all sounds disgustingly horrible - you don't know what the abuse perpetrator has been telling your extended family and if they're lying through their teeth it will come out. Blowing things out into the open was the right move I think. I don't really have much else I feel I can say about this and I'm sure there are people here who do and will express things much better than me. The fact that you have a supportive and understanding partner is the most important thing though - hang in there.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Saturday, 4 September 2004 10:54 (twenty years ago)

Penelope - I'm in the midst of a similar situation at the moment. Don't feel bad about feeling "like a total arse for having written this to a bunch of strangers". It's got to go somewhere and it's better here than pinballing around your skull.

― Gribowitz (Lynskey), Saturday, 4 September 2004 11:05 (twenty years ago)

*echoing the above*

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 4 September 2004 12:39 (twenty years ago)

Thank you everyone.

Ned, PLEASE check the moderator request forum.

― Penelope_111 (Penelope_111), Saturday, 4 September 2004 12:51 (twenty years ago)

Alas, I'm not an ILE mod and can do nothing here, but I'll try and get the attention of someone as I can.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 4 September 2004 12:54 (twenty years ago)

Thank you, much appreciated.

― Penelope_111 (Penelope_111), Saturday, 4 September 2004 12:54 (twenty years ago)

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