SMELL MY GAS

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It happens so often. I get up in the morning, struggling for
air and consciousness, and stumble to the dungbowl. Just for a nice, relief bringing piss. Suddenly there's a small explosion at my rear, infact almost a baker's dozen, of mini shells popping and cracking.
The fabric of the morning's virgin peace is torn. Like a white flag,
desecrated. I am embarassed, indeed overcome with shame. People around, those who've heard or smelt, are sick and embarassed themselves, perhaps resentful. Possibly, who knows, I am building a world of trouble for myself.
This fart gas is a daily ritual I cannot eliminate. My bowels mock me with their vengeful quacking.
Help me, please.

gramps, Sunday, 5 September 2004 01:08 (twenty years ago)

Rest of the day's fine though. It's just this morning nightmare.

gramps, Sunday, 5 September 2004 01:10 (twenty years ago)

weapons of ass destruction

Eisbär (llamasfur), Sunday, 5 September 2004 01:12 (twenty years ago)

ew

rainy (rainy), Sunday, 5 September 2004 01:14 (twenty years ago)

I can now die happy.

the music mole (colin s barrow), Sunday, 5 September 2004 01:17 (twenty years ago)

too much gas and wee.

Krankenhaus, Sunday, 5 September 2004 03:45 (twenty years ago)

Suddenly there's a small explosion at my rear, infact almost a baker's dozen, of mini shells popping and cracking.

i thought you meant you shat yourself

ken c (ken c), Sunday, 5 September 2004 21:54 (twenty years ago)

or did you? urgh.

ken c (ken c), Sunday, 5 September 2004 21:54 (twenty years ago)

four months pass...
RELIVE

sorry

gramps, Friday, 21 January 2005 21:41 (twenty years ago)

one year passes...
HOW GOES IT

tremendoid (tremendoid), Friday, 5 May 2006 14:52 (nineteen years ago)

This fart gas is a daily ritual I cannot eliminate.

Sounds like elimination is something he has no problem with.

Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Friday, 5 May 2006 15:41 (nineteen years ago)


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