Social dilema in the street.

xpost Gem

xxpost - i quite often don't wear my glasses when i'm strolling around in the street so it's pretty likely i would behave the same as you chris! people often tell me they were waving madly at me in the street and i went blithely on in total ignorance

Penny Smith in my office would be nice, though ;-)

I am horribly short sighted too, so I am notorious for having friends spot me from way off in the road, wave or shout hi, and I miss them totally.

The other day my best mate and his wife drove past me on Chapel st and were yelling "SCRUBBER!" at me out their car window and it took me ages to realise it was aimed at me, heh. Felt like a dork.

CORRIEARKLET (n.)
The moment at which two people approaching from opposite ends of a long passageway, recognise each other and immediately pretend they haven't. This is to avoid the ghastly embarrassment of having to continue recognising each other the whole length of the corridor.

CORRIECRAVIE (n.)
To avert the horrors of corrievorrie (q.v.) corriecravie is usually employed. This is the cowardly but highly skilled process by which both protagonists continue to approach while keeping up the pretence that they haven't noticed each other - by staring furiously at their feet, grimacing into a notebook, or studying the walls closely as if in a mood of deep irritation.

CORRIEDOO (n.)
The crucial moment of false recognition in a long passageway encounter. Though both people are perfectly well aware that the other is approaching, they must eventually pretend sudden recognition. They now look up with a glassy smile, as if having spotted each other for the first time, (and are particularly delighted to have done so) shouting out 'Haaaaaallllloooo!' as if to say 'Good grief!! You!! Here!! Of all people! Will I never. Coo. Stap me vitals, etc.'

CORRIEMOILLIE (n.)
The dreadful sinking sensation in a long passageway encounter when both protagonists immediately realise they have plumped for the corriedoo (q.v.) much too early as they are still a good thirty yards apart. They were embarrassed by the pretence of corriecravie (q.v.) and decided to make use of the corriedoo because they felt silly. This was a mistake as corrievorrie (q.v.) will make them seem far sillier.

CORRIEVORRIE (n.)
Corridor etiquette demands that one a corriedoo (q.v.) has been declared, corrievorrie must be employed. Both protagonists must now embellish their approach with an embarrassing combination of waving, grinning, making idiot faces, doing pirate impressions, and waggling the head from side to side while holding the other person's eyes as the smile drips off their face, until with great relief, they pass each other.

CORRIEMUCHLOCH (n.)
Word describing the kind of person who can make a complete mess of a simple job like walking down a corridor.

1. The hand salute is rendered while at the position of attention, whether standing or walking; a senior officer may return a salute from a seated position when a junior member is reporting in. Do not hold anything in the right hand while saluting, marching or walking in uniform. If both hands are full, nod a greeting to the approaching officer.

2. Salutes are exchanged outdoors, or in a "cover area" i.e. whenever you have your cover on, between officers, warrant officers, foreign officers, and cadets, on and off military installations.

3. Saluting distance is the distance at which recognition is easy, generally about 6 to 12 paces away.

4. When an officer is within saluting distance, salute and give the proper verbal greeting, depending on the time of day:

"Good morning/afternoon/evening, Sir/Ma'am"

If there is more than one officer, greet with the proper response, as determined by the situation:

"Good morning/afternoon/evening, officers/gentlemen/ladies"

5. Salute all staff cars with front license plates indicating senior officers and the USAF staff cars with roofs painted white. These usually indicate the Wing/Base Commander is inside.

6. It is not necessary for you to salute an officer when you pass him/her from the rear; simply give a verbal greeting.

...missus.