homophobia = the last refuge of scoundrels (i.e., jimmy swaggart is back in the news again)

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i suppose that jerry lee lewis's most famous cousin wants a 2d 15 minutes of fame, and steal some of the spotlight from fred "godhatesfags.com" phelps (maybe so he can get enough $$$ to fuck more skanky hookers?) click here.

this is an "80s revival" that we can all do w/t.

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Sunday, 19 September 2004 02:08 (twenty years ago)

the salient bit, from the above link:

According to a transcript of the program, Mr. Swaggart said: "I'm trying to find the correct name for it ... this utter absolute, asinine, idiotic stupidity of men marrying men. ... I've never seen a man in my life I wanted to marry. And I'm gonna be blunt and plain; if one ever looks at me like that, I'm gonna kill him and tell God he died."

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Sunday, 19 September 2004 02:09 (twenty years ago)

BWAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA

.........loser

― AaronHz (AaronHz), Sunday, 19 September 2004 02:13 (twenty years ago)

Jimmy, rest assured; There ain't one in the bunch that would want you so rest your weary little head.

― jim wentworth (wench), Sunday, 19 September 2004 02:18 (twenty years ago)

"i have sinned against YOUUU-HOOO-HOOOOOOOOOOO ... and i beg yer forgiveness!"

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Sunday, 19 September 2004 02:30 (twenty years ago)

The only thing any gay man wants to put near Falwell's nether regions is a baseball bat covered with spikes and ravenous penis-eating marmosets.

― Dan Perry '08 (Dan Perry), Sunday, 19 September 2004 02:54 (twenty years ago)

"And I'm gonna be blunt and plain; if one ever looks at me like that, I'm gonna kill him and tell God he died."

Taken out of context and, say, put into a good Western, this would've been a pretty good line. As it is now, it's ruined.

― Pleasant Plains (Pleasant Plains), Sunday, 19 September 2004 03:22 (twenty years ago)

"I'm gonna kill him and tell God he died."

Yes, this sounds like a really great professional-wrestling threat!

― Layna Andersen (Layna Andersen), Sunday, 19 September 2004 04:00 (twenty years ago)

does he think that god would be unaware that a man died?

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Sunday, 19 September 2004 04:07 (twenty years ago)

God trusts Jimmy to give it to him straight.

So to speak.

― spittle (spittle), Sunday, 19 September 2004 04:09 (twenty years ago)

I guess it's like when people thought it was okay to kill "n*ggers" = those lives aren't worth nothing.

I really wish God would send down a lightning bolt - STAT.

― Maria D. (Maria D.), Sunday, 19 September 2004 04:12 (twenty years ago)

fortunately for everyone, god doesn't usually answer to requests

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Sunday, 19 September 2004 04:14 (twenty years ago)

You must be asking wrong.

Jimmy Swaggart could help you with that. So long's you keep your hands to yourself.

― spittle (spittle), Sunday, 19 September 2004 04:17 (twenty years ago)

I can't even comprehend the mind that which thinks 'I've never seen a man I've wanted to marry' leads to 'men should not be allowed to marry'.

I've never seen anyone I've wanted to marry. And if anyone gets any ideas I'll kill them, paint them green and tell God they're a bush.

― Kevin Gilchrist (Mr Fusion), Sunday, 19 September 2004 04:22 (twenty years ago)

I can't even comprehend the mind that which thinks 'I've never seen a man I've wanted to marry' leads to 'men should not be allowed to marry'.

well if you had the whole "homosexuality is an abomination in the eyes of god" thing, it makes more sense

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Sunday, 19 September 2004 04:24 (twenty years ago)

video

― a banana (alanbanana), Sunday, 19 September 2004 23:27 (twenty years ago)

Someone needs to photoshop Swaggart's head onto loads and loads of gay porn forthwith.

― Sexual Air Supply (Autumn Almanac), Sunday, 19 September 2004 23:31 (twenty years ago)

again, he's also going on about "men marrying animals" -- from the videotape, talking about lawmakers considering legalizing gay marriage: "well, they ought to have to marry a pig and live w/ him forever."

sometimes, people just parody themselves.

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Monday, 20 September 2004 01:01 (twenty years ago)

Why do they always make that analogy? Are they suggesting one of the men must be a pig? I mean he's calling men pigs, which means he's a pig... hmmm I think I'm onto something here.

― Trayce (trayce), Monday, 20 September 2004 01:26 (twenty years ago)

Sounds more like ill-thought-out abuse.

'I'm male and I'm marrying a man!'
'YEAH?? WELL... MARRY A PIG!!!'

― Sexual Air Supply (Autumn Almanac), Monday, 20 September 2004 01:30 (twenty years ago)

I, like Hank Hill, blame the Muppets, what with frogs kissing pigs and whatnot.

― alfalfa romeo (natepatrin), Monday, 20 September 2004 01:31 (twenty years ago)

Actually this sort of bile is probably what happens when you go to school and all the kids call you Jimmy Faggart.

― alfalfa romeo (natepatrin), Monday, 20 September 2004 01:33 (twenty years ago)

i also love how he pronounces "abomination" -- A-BOMB-NATION. like, where did the third syllable go?!?

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Monday, 20 September 2004 02:04 (twenty years ago)

southern accent man

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Monday, 20 September 2004 02:28 (twenty years ago)

(er and his sidekick, drawlboy)

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Monday, 20 September 2004 02:30 (twenty years ago)

It seems like his "I've never seen a man I want to marry" bit is expressing doubt that gay men even exist, kind of like Queen Victoria and lesbians. I guess that, like Alan Partridge, he's a homoskeptic.

― Kevin Gilchrist (Mr Fusion), Monday, 20 September 2004 02:45 (twenty years ago)

Evangelist Jimmy Swaggart apologizes after remark about ‘killing’ gay men
BATON ROUGE, La. (AP-CP) — Evangelist Jimmy Swaggart apologized Wednesday for saying in a televised worship service that he would kill any gay man who looked at him romantically.
A complaint was filed with the Canadian Broadcast Standards Council after the show aired on a Toronto station, and Swaggart said his Baton Rouge-based Jimmy Swaggart Ministries has received complaints from gay groups over the remarks made on the Sept. 12 telecast.
In the broadcast, Swaggart was discussing his opposition to gay marriage when he said “I’ve never seen a man in my life I wanted to marry.”
“And I’m going to be blunt and plain: If one ever looks at me like that, I’m going to kill him and tell God he died,” Swaggart said to laughter and applause from the congregation.
On Wednesday, Swaggart said he has jokingly used the expression “killing someone and telling God he died” thousands of times, about all sorts of people. He said the expression is figurative and not meant to harm.
“It’s a humorous statement that doesn’t mean anything. You can’t lie to God — it’s ridiculous,” Swaggart told The Associated Press. “If it’s an insult, I certainly didn’t think it was, but if they are offended, then I certainly offer an apology.”
Audio recordings of the Sept. 12 statements have circulated on gay-themed websites.
In Ottawa, Ron Cohen, national chair of the Canadian Broadcast Standards Council, confirmed that the complaint was received by the self-regulating industry group after the show was broadcast by OMNI 1 in Toronto.
“We have at least a six- to eight-week period before there’s a determination of whether we would go forward because the broadcaster has three weeks to respond to the complaint,” he said.
The complainant will then have three weeks to indicate whether he or she is satisfied by the broadcaster’s explanation, Cohen explained.
“And then, we determine after that whether it’s a matter which would be sent to our adjudication process if the complainant isn’t happy.”
Swaggart was a popular television evangelist during the 1980s until a 1987 sex scandal involving a prostitute that he met in a seedy New Orleans motel. Swaggart never confessed to anything more than an unspecified sin. A few years later, he was stopped by police while driving in California with a suspected prostitute in his car.

― Huk-L, Wednesday, 22 September 2004 19:08 (twenty years ago)

last week on Irish TV there was a debate about whether gay marriage should be legalised.

some token liberal journo or something, who was clearly marked as a liberal by the wrinkly linen jacket he was wearing, made the sensible case for gay marriage, diversity in the country yadda yadda sensible correct etc.

then as he was finishing his "opponent", a TD from Kerry, made the following shrewd retort:

"OK, OK, but just one question for you, just one question. IF we legalise gay marriage, IF we do that. WHERE. DO THE KIDS. COME FROM?????"

this is the utter fucking swamp I live in.

― Ronan (Ronan), Wednesday, 22 September 2004 19:13 (twenty years ago)

Gotta admit, that's a hard argument to counter.

― briania (briania), Wednesday, 22 September 2004 19:16 (twenty years ago)

the kids will be harvested from stem cells duh

― amateur!!st, Wednesday, 22 September 2004 19:17 (twenty years ago)

legalising homosexuality would of course require the systematic rape of straight males.

― Ronan (Ronan), Wednesday, 22 September 2004 19:18 (twenty years ago)

Duh. Didn't you read the pamphlet?

― Dan Perry '08 (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 22 September 2004 19:19 (twenty years ago)

"OK, OK, but just one question for you, just one question. IF we legalise gay marriage, IF we do that. WHERE. DO THE KIDS. COME FROM?????"

That would be up the butt, Bob.

― n/a (Nick A.), Wednesday, 22 September 2004 19:20 (twenty years ago)

the worst part is this guy wears a weird leather cap and has greasy skin and stuff and you can imagine him giving it the "it's not natural" thing.

I mean if he called to my door I'd go and make sure all our sewage systems were working.

― Ronan (Ronan), Wednesday, 22 September 2004 19:23 (twenty years ago)

"OK, OK, but just one question for you, just one question. IF we legalise gay marriage, IF we do that. WHERE. DO THE KIDS. COME FROM?????"

It's amusing that some straight people seem to think heterosexuality wouldn't hold its own in the free market.

― Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Wednesday, 22 September 2004 19:30 (twenty years ago)

On the other hand, we could always tell him THE KIDS COME FROM THE CABBAGE PATCH, DIDN'T YR MUM TELL YOU *ANYTHING*?

― Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Wednesday, 22 September 2004 19:31 (twenty years ago)

some people DO seem like they were SHAT OUTTA DA BUTT* than pushed outta da twat, if ya ask me.

(* -- swaggart, and those who still give him the time of day, being prime examples of same)

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Thursday, 23 September 2004 05:14 (twenty years ago)

agreed, but swaggart is classic if only for providing the world with the amazing fact that jerry lee lewis's cousin and partner in youthful carousing is now a televangelist. there's a great epic novel in there somewhere.

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Thursday, 23 September 2004 05:18 (twenty years ago)

jimmy shares another trait w/ jerry lee ... he likes 'em young -- REAL young. as in, "if any of these people sitting in that audience allow jimmy to be left alone w/ their barely-pubescent daughters ..."

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Thursday, 23 September 2004 05:21 (twenty years ago)

that's melville-quality material

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Thursday, 23 September 2004 05:23 (twenty years ago)

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