Carry On ILXing

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who here has the dirtiest laugh?

― teh pow! (blueski), Wednesday, 22 September 2004 14:31 (twenty-one years ago)

Baran.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Wednesday, 22 September 2004 14:32 (twenty-one years ago)

No contest.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Wednesday, 22 September 2004 14:32 (twenty-one years ago)

Whose breasts appear 'accidentally' most often?

― Liz :x (Liz :x), Wednesday, 22 September 2004 14:42 (twenty-one years ago)

Allyzay's, clearly

― teh pow! (blueski), Wednesday, 22 September 2004 14:43 (twenty-one years ago)

Who's the lovable bumbling Jim Dale idiot then?

― C J (C J), Wednesday, 22 September 2004 17:48 (twenty-one years ago)

explain me "carry on"

― s1ocki (slutsky), Wednesday, 22 September 2004 17:54 (twenty-one years ago)

I thought you knew about cinema.

― RJG (RJG), Wednesday, 22 September 2004 17:55 (twenty-one years ago)

Carry On - a series of very dated British comedy films revolving purely around the ancient art of double entendre. Hilarious if you're under 10 years of age, or from the 50s.

― Wooden (Wooden), Wednesday, 22 September 2004 18:12 (twenty-one years ago)

This is the kind of thing-

http://www.carryonline.com/carry/images/stills/people/sid-babs-abroad.jpg

― Wooden (Wooden), Wednesday, 22 September 2004 18:15 (twenty-one years ago)

Old men who steal the breasts of hapless blondes?

― Dan Perry '08 (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 22 September 2004 18:17 (twenty-one years ago)

Pretty much.

― Wooden (Wooden), Wednesday, 22 September 2004 18:18 (twenty-one years ago)

I keep looking at that picture and hearing that guy saying, "WHERE THE TITTIES AT???"

― Dan Perry '08 (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 22 September 2004 18:22 (twenty-one years ago)

ihttp://www.livrariaexotica.com.br/Imagens%20arquivo/XM%202/x%20m2%20magneto%20corpo%20cartaz.jpg

― Jordan (Jordan), Wednesday, 22 September 2004 18:36 (twenty-one years ago)

It weird to thing there are whole contitents of people who know nothing of Carry On films. They're totally part of our cultural fabric.

― Wooden (Wooden), Wednesday, 22 September 2004 18:41 (twenty-one years ago)

i always had some sort of vague idea what they were, but no specific empirical information. kind of in the benny hill tradition then?

― s1ocki (slutsky), Wednesday, 22 September 2004 19:03 (twenty-one years ago)

A similar level of humour, certainly. This should educate you, as well as dispell a number of myths about British sophistication -

http://www.carryonline.com/

― Wooden (Wooden), Wednesday, 22 September 2004 19:48 (twenty-one years ago)

I like the idea of someone called Wooden being an expert on Carry On films. It's like it's come full circle.

― Lara (Lara), Wednesday, 22 September 2004 19:54 (twenty-one years ago)

Ooh Matron!

― Jarlr'mai (jarlrmai), Wednesday, 22 September 2004 19:55 (twenty-one years ago)

*cackles and skirt falls off revealing lacy knickers and suspender belt*

― Lara (Lara), Wednesday, 22 September 2004 19:56 (twenty-one years ago)

"Has something COME UP, doctor?"

― Wooden (Wooden), Wednesday, 22 September 2004 19:58 (twenty-one years ago)

"Oooooh, I never!"

― Lara (Lara), Wednesday, 22 September 2004 19:59 (twenty-one years ago)

*dresses up like a woman, due to hugely implausible plot twist*

― Jarlr'mai (jarlrmai), Wednesday, 22 September 2004 20:00 (twenty-one years ago)

"How would you like me for my examination?"

― Lara (Lara), Wednesday, 22 September 2004 20:01 (twenty-one years ago)

*faints as doctor produces large marrow*

― Lara (Lara), Wednesday, 22 September 2004 20:02 (twenty-one years ago)

Wow, I've never even heard of Carry On films! This looks WACKY.

― Towelette Pettatucci (Homosexual II), Wednesday, 22 September 2004 20:02 (twenty-one years ago)

*Acts in an extremely gay manner for entire film. This is, apparently, hysterical*

― Wooden (Wooden), Wednesday, 22 September 2004 20:03 (twenty-one years ago)

(applauds)

― s1ocki (slutsky), Wednesday, 22 September 2004 20:03 (twenty-one years ago)

*switches channel*

― t\'\'t (t\'\'t), Wednesday, 22 September 2004 20:51 (twenty-one years ago)

Haha, GET IT NOW, s10cki?

― adam. (nordicskilla), Wednesday, 22 September 2004 20:53 (twenty-one years ago)

Are there any ugly ILxors who have inponderable success with young ladies?

ihttp://www.deepsensations.net/video-images/camping2.jpg

http://news.bbc.co.uk/olmedia/100000/images/_104760_james.jpg

― Dave B (daveb), Wednesday, 22 September 2004 21:24 (twenty-one years ago)

My mother was Kenneth Williams' secretary for a while. She said he was very nice.

― adam. (nordicskilla), Wednesday, 22 September 2004 21:25 (twenty-one years ago)

I suggest you all get yourselves into Carry On films with all speed. The back catalogue is HUGE MISSUS.

― Sexual Air Supply (Autumn Almanac), Wednesday, 22 September 2004 21:25 (twenty-one years ago)

sorry, i never liked carry on. mind you, carry on screaming was ace. oh, and the recent (well, twelve years ago now) one where they discover america was actually very good.

okay, i like them :-)

― dog latin (dog latin), Wednesday, 22 September 2004 22:51 (twenty-one years ago)

I refuse to let this thread die.

― Sexual Air Supply (Autumn Almanac), Thursday, 23 September 2004 05:54 (twenty-one years ago)

I went into the kitchen and saw the most enormous plunger stuck to the floor. I tugged and tugged but I couldn't pull it off.

― Sexual Air Supply (Autumn Almanac), Thursday, 23 September 2004 05:55 (twenty-one years ago)

Then I put an extra large pastie into the extra small oven. I popped it in and it became stuck. I had to get a man in to loosen it for me.

― Sexual Air Supply (Autumn Almanac), Thursday, 23 September 2004 05:58 (twenty-one years ago)

Then I pulled some Blu-Tack off the wall. It was soft, so I played with it until it went hard.

― Sexual Air Supply (Autumn Almanac), Thursday, 23 September 2004 05:59 (twenty-one years ago)

My wife came into the kitchen and asked if fancied a nice bit of crumpet. Not half, I replied!

― Dave B (daveb), Thursday, 23 September 2004 06:45 (twenty-one years ago)

oooh, don't mess about. stop messin' about.

― Ed (dali), Thursday, 23 September 2004 07:13 (twenty-one years ago)

My wife was slicing some cake and asked if I'd like a piece. WOULD I? said I.

― Sexual Air Supply (Autumn Almanac), Thursday, 23 September 2004 07:19 (twenty-one years ago)

Oooh, you are a one *does Babs Windsor giggle* You wath what you're doing with that air supply, there's some round here that might get the wrong end of the hose.

― Anna (Anna), Thursday, 23 September 2004 07:26 (twenty-one years ago)

I was mending the fence in the back garden when my neighbour's wife popped her head over the fence and said that I was very good with my hands and knew how to use my tool. I gave her a cheeky smile, looked back to the house to check my slightly large and plump wife wasn't looking and said 'heh heh heh'. A kazoo sounded for no discernible reason. My neighbours wife wanted to come and have a chat, but got stuck. As she struggled, she said that she couldn't get her leg over, and I laughed again.

― Dave B (daveb), Thursday, 23 September 2004 08:31 (twenty-one years ago)

I have never seen a 'Carry On' film.

― The Enriquefox, Thursday, 23 September 2004 08:32 (twenty-one years ago)

As a fruiterer, I just can't help but admire your plums.

― teh pow! (blueski), Thursday, 23 September 2004 08:33 (twenty-one years ago)

Your melons look quite tasty and all.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Thursday, 23 September 2004 08:51 (twenty-one years ago)

That's a nice pear!

― Dave B (daveb), Thursday, 23 September 2004 08:51 (twenty-one years ago)

You don't get many of 'em to a pahnd! Yakyakyakyakyak!

― robster (robster), Thursday, 23 September 2004 08:52 (twenty-one years ago)

This puts me in mind of a full page advert in the NME for King Kurt's album, Big Cock (artwork featuring a giant cockerel of course.)

It simply said, KING KURT'S BIG COCK IS OUT!

Fnarrr

― mzui, Thursday, 23 September 2004 09:25 (twenty-one years ago)

ack ack ack

― the surface noise (slight return) (electricsound), Thursday, 23 September 2004 09:26 (twenty-one years ago)

"Asked the waitress to fetch the chutney, but instead she just palmed me off with relish."

― NickB (NickB), Thursday, 23 September 2004 09:31 (twenty-one years ago)

oooh sauce

― Anna (Anna), Thursday, 23 September 2004 10:08 (twenty-one years ago)

I had to ask her to fetch me a cloth as I was all hot and sticky! Yakyakyak.

― Liz :x (Liz :x), Thursday, 23 September 2004 10:08 (twenty-one years ago)

I was walking along a mountain path only wide enough for one person and a beautiful lady came along in the othger direction. I didn't know if I should back up or toss myself off.

― Johnney B (Johnney B), Thursday, 23 September 2004 10:10 (twenty-one years ago)

'Ere! [looks affronted, bald]

― Markelby (Mark C), Thursday, 23 September 2004 10:11 (twenty-one years ago)

Infamy! Infamy! They've all got it in for me!
http://www.wepwawet.nl/films/1964%20Carry%20on%20Cleo/pics/pic1003.jpg

― robster (robster), Thursday, 23 September 2004 10:22 (twenty-one years ago)

X-POSTING TONIGHT!

― teh pow! (blueski), Thursday, 23 September 2004 10:26 (twenty-one years ago)

Sergeant Major: We need some officers around to clean this mess up

Another army man: We haven't got any officers present sir!

Sergeant Major: We'll have to get our privates out then.

― Dave B (daveb), Thursday, 23 September 2004 10:43 (twenty-one years ago)

I prefer this thread to the slash one.

― Liz :x (Liz :x), Thursday, 23 September 2004 10:46 (twenty-one years ago)

"I was once a weak man."
"Once a week is enough for any man."

http://www.btinternet.com/~a.n.preece/images/hattie1.jpg

― robster (robster), Thursday, 23 September 2004 10:57 (twenty-one years ago)

Oh, I guess I'd have to be Charles Hawtrey :/

― jel -- (jel), Thursday, 23 September 2004 17:10 (twenty-one years ago)

My local library has a bunch of Carry On dvds. I don't really care for "british humour", but maybe I'll give these the old cambridge try. tally-ho.

― Huk-L, Thursday, 23 September 2004 17:32 (twenty-one years ago)

You will probably hate them.

― adam. (nordicskilla), Thursday, 23 September 2004 17:33 (twenty-one years ago)

what's british humour? you mean like Teh Day Today?

― teh pow! (blueski), Thursday, 23 September 2004 18:06 (twenty-one years ago)

Knott's Landing

― Huk-L, Thursday, 23 September 2004 18:07 (twenty-one years ago)

Think Monty Python with more (some?) smut.

― Lara (Lara), Thursday, 23 September 2004 18:08 (twenty-one years ago)

How does it compare to Are You Being Served?

― Huk-L, Thursday, 23 September 2004 18:09 (twenty-one years ago)

It pails to insignificance.

― jel -- (jel), Thursday, 23 September 2004 18:10 (twenty-one years ago)

Quite similar to all Mrs Slocombe's (sp?) lines - "My pussy is wet" etc.

― Lara (Lara), Thursday, 23 September 2004 18:10 (twenty-one years ago)

Huck, it's "Some Mothers Do 'Ave 'Em" and "Porridge" that you should be trying.

― jel -- (jel), Thursday, 23 September 2004 18:12 (twenty-one years ago)

It's got a lot of the same kind of lame smutty gags as Are You Being Served, but incomparably better comedy acting - what made these successful is surely a lot to do with the great performances of Sid James, Kenneth Williams, Charles Hawtrey and others, not the rubbish jokes, hardly any of which are worth remembering.

Best: maybe Carry On Cowboy or Cleo, I think.

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Thursday, 23 September 2004 20:00 (twenty-one years ago)

Carry on a bit ITV - it was smut hiding amongst bad comedy. BBC shows like AYBS and AA were smut masquerading as bad comedy. With carry on, you get bad gags and bab's tits. On BBC, it was a little coyer.

It wasn't ITV obv, but cinema allowed it be a bit more ITV in sensibility.

― Dave B (daveb), Thursday, 23 September 2004 20:14 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.conceptsproducts.com/blkknighttb.jpg

Once a knight, always a knight
Twice a night and you're doin' all right

― Sexual Air Supply (Autumn Almanac), Thursday, 23 September 2004 20:42 (twenty-one years ago)

In fairness, there ARE some great lines in carry on filsm - if you liek Around the Horne, Carry On will do you great. Lots of shit, but the good ones are stupidly funny - Airplane! years before its time. Second Carry on Cleo - lots of funny jokes. Sid James, a roman legionaire, gets caught in Typical English Weather - "What a country."

Boom boom.

― Johnney B (Johnney B), Friday, 24 September 2004 10:59 (twenty-one years ago)

"Carry On Cowboy" is indeed good - Kenneth Williams called the first convincing British western. The real comic genius of the Carry On's is Kenneth Connor of course - he is soooooooooooooooooo underrated

― Dadrockismus (Dada), Friday, 24 September 2004 11:03 (twenty-one years ago)

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