Did Rebecca Loos really masturbate a pig on live TV?

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Or is this a vicious rumour?

― Sick Mouthy (Nick Southall), Thursday, 7 October 2004 08:16 (twenty-one years ago)

I saw her talking about it on the Farm programme. But missed the 'event'.

― mark grout (mark grout), Thursday, 7 October 2004 08:19 (twenty-one years ago)

Did she talk dirty to the pig, anyway?

― mark grout (mark grout), Thursday, 7 October 2004 08:19 (twenty-one years ago)

How far have we sunk, as a species, that loose women wanking pigs is now light-entertainment?

― Sick Mouthy (Nick Southall), Thursday, 7 October 2004 08:20 (twenty-one years ago)

"Pork me, David."

― Sick Mouthy (Nick Southall), Thursday, 7 October 2004 08:20 (twenty-one years ago)

pigs can't talk silly

― Freelance Hiveminder (blueski), Thursday, 7 October 2004 08:26 (twenty-one years ago)

But can they talk smart?!

― Sick Mouthy (Nick Southall), Thursday, 7 October 2004 08:27 (twenty-one years ago)

Loose women have always wanked pigs for light entertainment. TV was just too paternalistic to broadcast it before.

― Alba (Alba), Thursday, 7 October 2004 08:28 (twenty-one years ago)

They always cut to the adverts when Vanessa Phelps did it...

― mark grout (mark grout), Thursday, 7 October 2004 08:31 (twenty-one years ago)

Vanessa Felches.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Thursday, 7 October 2004 08:33 (twenty-one years ago)

Live on Channel 5.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Thursday, 7 October 2004 08:35 (twenty-one years ago)

I thought this thread was about Stan Collymore.

― Billy Dods (Billy Dods), Thursday, 7 October 2004 08:37 (twenty-one years ago)

"from dogging to catting" oh how we laughed...

― mark grout (mark grout), Thursday, 7 October 2004 08:40 (twenty-one years ago)

Note how all the front pages of the papers (that are covering this) are 'concentrating' on the morals/complaining phonecalls, when all they want to really say is "REBECCA LOOS MAST3RBATED A PIG ON TV ARRRGGHH!!!"

― mark grout (mark grout), Thursday, 7 October 2004 08:42 (twenty-one years ago)

Did she bring the pig to climax? How long did it take? I must know!

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Thursday, 7 October 2004 08:57 (twenty-one years ago)

10 minutes, apparently

― stelfox, Thursday, 7 October 2004 08:59 (twenty-one years ago)

I presume the pig was nervous about having to perform for the camera.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Thursday, 7 October 2004 09:02 (twenty-one years ago)

Would have been quicker if she used her mouth.

I'm just saying.

― Jarlr'mai (jarlrmai), Thursday, 7 October 2004 09:03 (twenty-one years ago)

Did Mark C watch this?

― I'm just asking, like... (Matt DC), Thursday, 7 October 2004 09:04 (twenty-one years ago)

i like the way in the sun they have a guy saying "we don't want to see pigs doing that on TV"

it's not entirely clear that he is talking about the boar.

― stelfox, Thursday, 7 October 2004 09:04 (twenty-one years ago)

Please let someone have capped this so I can dub the video.

― Jarlr'mai (jarlrmai), Thursday, 7 October 2004 09:06 (twenty-one years ago)

Don't pig orgasms last for half an hour or something? (I think I read this in Farmers Weekly once)

― C J (C J), Thursday, 7 October 2004 09:16 (twenty-one years ago)

like the way in the sun they have a guy saying "we don't want to see pigs doing that on TV"
it's not entirely clear that he is talking about the boar.
Hahahahahaha!

― PinXorchiXoR (Pinkpanther), Thursday, 7 October 2004 09:17 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.thesun.co.uk/article/0,,2-2004462161,00.html

"grinning Loos pleasures pig"

― slb2, Thursday, 7 October 2004 09:21 (twenty-one years ago)

The page didn't load! I don't know whether I feel sad or not!

― PinXorchiXoR (Pinkpanther), Thursday, 7 October 2004 09:23 (twenty-one years ago)

It took her ten minutes to fill a flask with nearly three quarters of a pint.

THREE QUARTERS OF A PINT?! Jaysus the edge!

Are there any animals that spunk past the one-pint mark then? How much semen do you get out a horse.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Thursday, 7 October 2004 09:24 (twenty-one years ago)

"It took her ten minutes to fill a flask with nearly three quarters of a pint

Blimey!

(xpost)

― C J (C J), Thursday, 7 October 2004 09:26 (twenty-one years ago)

There is a picture of Rebecca Loos holding up a plastic bag full of pig semen. And lots of Outraged of Tunbridge Wells types going "it's digusting! It's bestiality!"

It had never occurred to me that it might be bestiality to be honest. I mean, isn't it the sort of thing real farmers do every day?

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Thursday, 7 October 2004 09:28 (twenty-one years ago)

Cabbie Ian Millar, 32, of Salford, Gtr Manchester, said: “It was horrible. I could barely watch.”

Barely. But did anyway. And then....

Was C5 right to show it?
YES
CALL: 09063 612214 NO
CALL: 09063 612215

UK ONLY - CALLS COST 10p

― mark grout (mark grout), Thursday, 7 October 2004 09:28 (twenty-one years ago)

Its just occurred to me that this is exactly like an episode of Brass Eye.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Thursday, 7 October 2004 09:29 (twenty-one years ago)

maybe it's not semen but just milk and this is all some elaborate ruse?

― Freelance Hiveminder (blueski), Thursday, 7 October 2004 09:30 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm not quite as disgusted by this as I'd hoped to be. It's nice when someone stumbles on their rightful role in life. Well done, Rebecca!

That page wouldn't shoot its load for me either, perhaps it is very popular.

― Leon the Pig Farmer (PJ Miller), Thursday, 7 October 2004 09:32 (twenty-one years ago)

Cumming soon - Rebecca Lo0s and Abi Titmuss do An1mal Farm. On a P2P network near you.

The idea that this is a like a pron film with fake money shots is tickling me pink (DYS!)

― Dave B (daveb), Thursday, 7 October 2004 09:32 (twenty-one years ago)

According to DigitalSpy, tonight's episode apparently shows Debbie McGee cleaning a horse's foreskin.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Thursday, 7 October 2004 09:33 (twenty-one years ago)

I can see the ratings shooting up already. Is it on all day?

― PJ Miller (PJ Miller), Thursday, 7 October 2004 09:34 (twenty-one years ago)

Hang on - the Scum story says she was collecting pig jizz for inseminating cows - THAT'S DISGUSTING and probably pointless, as I'm sure someone can prove with science.

― Dave B (daveb), Thursday, 7 October 2004 09:34 (twenty-one years ago)

"Its just occurred to me that this is exactly like an episode of Brass Eye."

Yeah I think Chris Morris has given up how can he compete with actual pig wanking?

― Jarlr'mai (jarlrmai), Thursday, 7 October 2004 09:35 (twenty-one years ago)

So it wasn't just for fun? What a swizz.

― PJ Miller (PJ Miller), Thursday, 7 October 2004 09:36 (twenty-one years ago)

According to DigitalSpy, tonight's episode apparently shows Debbie McGee cleaning a horse's foreskin.

Going home to Paul will be a bit of anticlimax then.

― Billy Dods (Billy Dods), Thursday, 7 October 2004 09:37 (twenty-one years ago)

(Links to the Sun often fail to load the first time, but if you try again straight after they usually work.)

― slb2, Thursday, 7 October 2004 09:38 (twenty-one years ago)

Doesn't a pig have a corkscrew-shaped penis?

― C J (C J), Thursday, 7 October 2004 09:39 (twenty-one years ago)

learn to read is says "sows"

― stelfox, Thursday, 7 October 2004 09:39 (twenty-one years ago)

Jizz swizz

This 'what really goes on on a farm' could be the death of the Common Agriculutral POlicy. People won't subsidise what they realise is just rampant preversion on the state.

― Dave B (daveb), Thursday, 7 October 2004 09:40 (twenty-one years ago)

That was the centre of much frenzied debate at Glastonbury, CJ.

We concluded, yes, it does.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Thursday, 7 October 2004 09:40 (twenty-one years ago)

I am sure I have detailed the occupation of an acquaintance of mine who used to deal in, ahem, bull semen. He didn't actually do the "extraction" but he told me all about it. Niiiiiiiiiiiiice. I think bulls go past the pint pot, as it were.

― Sick Mouthy (Nick Southall), Thursday, 7 October 2004 09:41 (twenty-one years ago)

Is she getting paid for being on the show?

― Jarlr'mai (jarlrmai), Thursday, 7 October 2004 09:43 (twenty-one years ago)

hey Pete Baran goes past the pint pot everday...

― Freelance Hiveminder (blueski), Thursday, 7 October 2004 09:45 (twenty-one years ago)

and then leaves his house for work

― Freelance Hiveminder (blueski), Thursday, 7 October 2004 09:46 (twenty-one years ago)

I imagine it must be quite difficult to wank a corkscrew-shaped penis. It must put terrible strain on your wrist - I expect there'd be the risk of developing Carpal Tunnel Syndrome if you had to do it a lot. Bit of a health hazard.

― C J (C J), Thursday, 7 October 2004 09:46 (twenty-one years ago)

well, imagine tugging a curly fry (but not so it mushes up in your hand), i'm sure it's not that hard (ooh hose me down)

― Freelance Hiveminder (blueski), Thursday, 7 October 2004 09:48 (twenty-one years ago)

Skipping 102 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.

I don't know.

― Alba (Alba), Thursday, 7 October 2004 16:42 (twenty-one years ago)

their trotters are too big to press the buttons.

― MarkH (MarkH), Thursday, 7 October 2004 16:42 (twenty-one years ago)

Lady pigs would be rubbish at masturbating a boy human. Trotters aren't exactly sensuous, are they?

― C J (C J), Thursday, 7 October 2004 16:42 (twenty-one years ago)

Boys are not sensual, as a whole.

― My Dinner With Little Lord Travolta (nordicskilla), Thursday, 7 October 2004 16:43 (twenty-one years ago)

EW BRITISH GUYS HAVE PENIS BUTTONS????????

― Dan Perry '08 (Dan Perry), Thursday, 7 October 2004 16:43 (twenty-one years ago)

Boys so are sensual.

― Alba (Alba), Thursday, 7 October 2004 16:44 (twenty-one years ago)

We call them "tuppeny ha'penny farthings", there are many popular childrens books about them.

xpost

Maybe Belle And Sebastain fans.

― My Dinner With Little Lord Travolta (nordicskilla), Thursday, 7 October 2004 16:44 (twenty-one years ago)

Sebastain!!

― My Dinner With Little Lord Travolta (nordicskilla), Thursday, 7 October 2004 16:45 (twenty-one years ago)

Well, let's flip the script here - would any boy human here like to be brought to orgasm by a female pig?

*Borishly* "Hey, sows it going, my little porcine beauty? Wanna screw?"

― Michael White (Hereward), Thursday, 7 October 2004 16:45 (twenty-one years ago)

I resent all this 'just poke a boy's button and you'll be fine' talk. I don't know why. On a thread about Rebecca Loos masturbating pigs, I ought to be able to find other things to get offended by.

― Alba (Alba), Thursday, 7 October 2004 16:46 (twenty-one years ago)

Write to The Sun, N.!!

― My Dinner With Little Lord Travolta (nordicskilla), Thursday, 7 October 2004 16:48 (twenty-one years ago)

You just need to get porked.

― Remy (x Jeremy), Thursday, 7 October 2004 16:48 (twenty-one years ago)

Does a pig have a corkscrew-shaped penis? -- source of the pig-gear illustration above as well.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 7 October 2004 16:49 (twenty-one years ago)

I've just read the Sun story. What's most disturbing is how without make up, Rebecca Loos looks like Julian Barnes.

Andrew Butler, of People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, fumed: “This is just pure titillation and I’m sure Rebecca Loos was chosen for that reason.

Titilation? I think Andrew Butler is revealing too much about himself there.

― Alba (Alba), Thursday, 7 October 2004 16:50 (twenty-one years ago)

Ned, keep up.

― Alba (Alba), Thursday, 7 October 2004 16:51 (twenty-one years ago)

From Ned's link:

Cecil is aware that in humans the penis does not penetrate the cervix, but as should be obvious by now, there are many differences between human and porcine sexual practices, the principal exception being a girl I met in St. Louis in 1974. But I digress.

― Remy (x Jeremy), Thursday, 7 October 2004 16:58 (twenty-one years ago)

I resent all this 'just poke a boy's button and you'll be fine' talk. I don't know why.

I resent it too, I think it makes me complacent.

― Cathy (Cathy), Thursday, 7 October 2004 16:58 (twenty-one years ago)

Cecil's quite funny, actually.

― Michael White (Hereward), Thursday, 7 October 2004 16:59 (twenty-one years ago)

Ned, keep up.

You were avoiding the matter in hand.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 7 October 2004 17:02 (twenty-one years ago)

in Rebecca's hand

― C J (C J), Thursday, 7 October 2004 17:03 (twenty-one years ago)

A pig in the hand is worth two in the ...?

― Michael White (Hereward), Thursday, 7 October 2004 17:05 (twenty-one years ago)

a pig's cock in the hand is worth two in the bush

xpost

― Freelance Pigbotherer (blueski), Thursday, 7 October 2004 17:06 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm going to prefer thinking of that partisanly as 'in the Bush'.

― Michael White (Hereward), Thursday, 7 October 2004 17:07 (twenty-one years ago)

My point was that some had already linked to that straightdope page.

― Alba (Alba), Thursday, 7 October 2004 18:29 (twenty-one years ago)

This should clear things up.

― Dan Perry '08 (Dan Perry), Thursday, 7 October 2004 18:30 (twenty-one years ago)

And if not that, then this.

― Gold Teeth II (kenan), Thursday, 7 October 2004 18:31 (twenty-one years ago)

Ah, thanks, guys! I think that video you were asking about is 'Star Guitar' by the Chemical Brothers.

― Alba (Alba), Thursday, 7 October 2004 18:31 (twenty-one years ago)

I love how teh Sun shows topless women but refuses to print the work wank, reducing it to w***.

― jocelyn (Jocelyn), Thursday, 7 October 2004 18:41 (twenty-one years ago)

"work wank"!

― Dan Perry '08 (Dan Perry), Thursday, 7 October 2004 18:42 (twenty-one years ago)

Britney decides to get in on the action, but in her confusion uses a cup on a photographer rather than a gloved hand on a pig:

http://www.stereogum.com/img/britneysubway1.jpg

― Dan Perry '08 (Dan Perry), Thursday, 7 October 2004 18:43 (twenty-one years ago)

Would there be less interest if she'd jerked off Collymore? I thought of him when I first heard she'd be giving a boar a handjob live on telly.

― B.A.R.M.S. (Barima), Thursday, 7 October 2004 18:48 (twenty-one years ago)

Britney jerked off Collymore?

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 7 October 2004 19:09 (twenty-one years ago)

She's already married to a hairy pig, two would be greedy.

― B.A.R.M.S. (Barima), Thursday, 7 October 2004 19:14 (twenty-one years ago)

This thread should have been started by Kool Keith.

― B.A.R.M.S. (Barima), Thursday, 7 October 2004 19:15 (twenty-one years ago)

one month passes...

So, who won this in the end?

― mark grout (mark grout), Wednesday, 10 November 2004 15:26 (twenty-one years ago)

The pig.

― Jarlr'mai (jarlrmai), Wednesday, 10 November 2004 16:01 (twenty-one years ago)

(i expected that answer..)

― mark grout (mark grout), Wednesday, 10 November 2004 16:07 (twenty-one years ago)

I didn't want to let you down.

― Jarlr'mai (jarlrmai), Wednesday, 10 November 2004 16:11 (twenty-one years ago)

I thank you.

― mark grout (mark grout), Wednesday, 10 November 2004 16:12 (twenty-one years ago)

Apparently a young lad by the name of Jeff won it.

― Jarlr'mai (jarlrmai), Wednesday, 10 November 2004 16:21 (twenty-one years ago)

on the other hand, rebecca really let the pig down

― ken c (ken c), Wednesday, 10 November 2004 16:38 (twenty-one years ago)

.. gently. Arranged a reunion, never went.

― mark grout (mark grout), Wednesday, 10 November 2004 16:44 (twenty-one years ago)

And to this day, the pig still can't jerk itself off without outside assistance.

― B.A.R.M.S. (Barima), Wednesday, 10 November 2004 16:51 (twenty-one years ago)

Well, he wouldn't have asked her in the first place if he could have.

― mark grout (mark grout), Wednesday, 10 November 2004 16:52 (twenty-one years ago)

Well, he wouldn't have asked her in the first place if he could have.

beckham did

― ken c (ken c), Wednesday, 10 November 2004 16:53 (twenty-one years ago)

Unless he needed both his trotters free to read a book.

― Jarlr'mai (jarlrmai), Wednesday, 10 November 2004 16:53 (twenty-one years ago)

Beckham "hey, scuse me, this pig I know, he really fancies you"

― mark grout (mark grout), Wednesday, 10 November 2004 16:54 (twenty-one years ago)

"OOOOIIIIIIII-IIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!"

― B.A.R.M.S. (Barima), Wednesday, 10 November 2004 16:59 (twenty-one years ago)

pierre van hooinkdonk?

― ken c (ken c), Wednesday, 10 November 2004 17:04 (twenty-one years ago)

"A woman like that could really put steam in a pig's stride."

― B.A.R.M.S. (Barima), Wednesday, 10 November 2004 17:09 (twenty-one years ago)

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