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My unusual fucking trip to Amoeba

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I knew things were going to be a little strange when I pulled up to the garage entrance to wait for Lot Full Man to move his sign so I could get a shaded subterranean spot, and a woman approached my window saying "you can park in my spot if you'd like" and pointed back down the street. I declined, saying "no thank you" and pointing out that Lot Full Man was moving his sign because there was a spot for me downstairs. Parking Spot Samaritan Lady gave me a REALLY dirty look, shook her head, and walked off down the street. For a second I questioned myself, wondering if I'd accidentally called her a bitch somewhere in my otherwise polite response. I shrugged it off.

So I park, go upstairs, and begin browsing through the new CDs. As I'm looking around, a woman walking the other way down the aisle bumps into me, turns to me, and apologizes. I turn to her and then do a double take because it's M@UR@ TIERNEY, who I fucking love! I stood there dazed for a second then sort of stammered "no problem" and she walks off down the aisle. I sort of wish I'd seen what CDs she was carrying, but maybe it's for the better that I didn't. If she's a Puddle of Mudd completist my crush might be gone.

At this point I'd forgotten what I was at the store for. So I head over to the vinyl section to look for some Compulsive Gamblers LP and I trip over a dog that's lying in the aisle! I didn't quite fall down, but the dog was startled and sort of yelped. He ran off.

So I gather myself and start looking through records. Suddenly a figure appeared next to me. Things seemed normal at first, just another customer or maybe an Amoeba employee. But I'm quickly aware that whoever is next to me is not in fact looking at the records but staring at me. I look to my left and there's this strange-looking man standing there, grinning at me, and DROOLING slightly. He nods to me and says "can you tell me Cheap trick?" I sort of looked at him funny and he nodded again and said "can you....tell ME....CHeap Trick!" I gestured over to the Cheap Trick section, he looked over at it, looked back at me, and shook his head no.

At this point I literally just said aloud "This is a fucking sign, man" and bolted from the store.

― Gear! (Gear!), Friday, 15 October 2004 20:49 (twenty-one years ago)

(polite applause)

― n/a (Nick A.), Friday, 15 October 2004 20:53 (twenty-one years ago)

She seems cool. I saw her at the Cross/Odenkirk benefit for Kerry.

― dubya's emo army of compassion and guns (deangulberry), Friday, 15 October 2004 20:55 (twenty-one years ago)

that happened me just last week.

― darragh.mac (darragh.mac), Friday, 15 October 2004 20:55 (twenty-one years ago)

I also like M@aura T1erny.

― Jordan (Jordan), Friday, 15 October 2004 20:59 (twenty-one years ago)

I loved her - LOVED her - as Lisa Miller, but now, as herself, on Celebrity Poker... kinda snoozy.

― morris pavilion (samjeff), Friday, 15 October 2004 21:03 (twenty-one years ago)

I love you Gear. Now come to the damn FAPs next week. (Will e-mail you details.)

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 15 October 2004 21:05 (twenty-one years ago)

I bought "Astral Weeks" at Amoeba last night, never having heard it. What's the big deal? It sounds like a stoned, bellowing jam session.

― andy, Friday, 15 October 2004 21:07 (twenty-one years ago)

It sounds like Ashby BART on a weekend!

― adam. (nordicskilla), Friday, 15 October 2004 21:09 (twenty-one years ago)

i knew this was going to be Gear [as i scrolled down the thread] - he always comes out with crazy and entertaining stories about life.

― DJ Martian (djmartian), Friday, 15 October 2004 21:10 (twenty-one years ago)

I'd have left at the dog part.

― adam. (nordicskilla), Friday, 15 October 2004 21:12 (twenty-one years ago)

You make LA more interesting to me, Gear.

― luna (luna.c), Friday, 15 October 2004 21:12 (twenty-one years ago)

Astral Weeks never did it for me either. Veedon Fleece on the other hand. one of my favorite albums of all time. wedding song and all that.

Alyssa Millano is spotted regularly at the LA Amoeba. she lives around the corner from there. i've even seen her there and i don't even live in LA anymore. my friend fred who's the manager at the buy counter hides on the stairs to get better views of her and follows her around (in a creepy, non-creepy way)

― JaXoN (JasonD), Friday, 15 October 2004 21:17 (twenty-one years ago)

Is there a non-creepy way to follow a famous actress around the store?

― milozauckerman (miloaukerman), Friday, 15 October 2004 21:18 (twenty-one years ago)

not really, but he's my friend

― JaXoN (JasonD), Friday, 15 October 2004 21:19 (twenty-one years ago)

Once I was there at the buy counter and Jimmy Page was walking out with Joe Perry and some other Aerosmith guys, carrying big bags of purchases... all the staffers were aflutter.

― morris pavilion (samjeff), Friday, 15 October 2004 21:19 (twenty-one years ago)

hides ON the stairs?

― adam. (nordicskilla), Friday, 15 October 2004 21:19 (twenty-one years ago)

I saw Chris Noth there one time. He was wandering around the oldies section, looking for his career maybe.

ZING

― Gear! (Gear!), Friday, 15 October 2004 21:32 (twenty-one years ago)

MT is pretty damn hot in person.

― Gear! (Gear!), Friday, 15 October 2004 21:33 (twenty-one years ago)

Who's Maura Tierney?

― sundar subramanian (sundar), Friday, 15 October 2004 21:36 (twenty-one years ago)

I was thinking the same thing. Apparently she was on NewsRadio.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 15 October 2004 21:36 (twenty-one years ago)

Me , kyle, and gygax saw Devendra Banhart outside of Amoeba SF. he looked like a little fucking gypsy prince.

― adam. (nordicskilla), Friday, 15 October 2004 21:38 (twenty-one years ago)

with Joanna News0m in tow.

He looked like the son of the king of the cosmos who shot out all the stars and he needs to roll everything into a little ball to bring them back*.

*not actually d.banhart lyrics.

― gygax! (gygax!), Friday, 15 October 2004 21:44 (twenty-one years ago)

Courtney Love requested a private shopping spree in the days before the LA store opened, but was denied. I think this was the incident that started the downward spiral of pills and late night crying spells.

― andy, Friday, 15 October 2004 21:44 (twenty-one years ago)

Adam, there's no need for cursing.

― dubya's emo army of compassion and guns (deangulberry), Friday, 15 October 2004 21:45 (twenty-one years ago)

He looked like the son of the king of the cosmos who shot out all the stars and he needs to roll everything into a little ball to bring them back.

I can't get past MAKE A STAR 7!!!!! TOO HARD!

― adam. (nordicskilla), Friday, 15 October 2004 21:51 (twenty-one years ago)

gygax, sounds like you're quoting some t.rex (aka banhart sr.) lines:

Tree wizard puretongue
The digger of holes
The swan king
The Elf lord
The eater of souls
Lithon the black
The rider of stars
Tyrannosaurus Rex
The eater of cars

― JaXoN (JasonD), Friday, 15 October 2004 21:54 (twenty-one years ago)

MT was on EEE ARE ppl!

http://film.onet.pl/_i/news/duze/m/maura_tierney_1.jpg

― m. (mitchlnw), Friday, 15 October 2004 21:57 (twenty-one years ago)

i am jealous of you guys.. :(

― sometimes i like to pretend i am very small and warm (ex machina), Friday, 15 October 2004 22:01 (twenty-one years ago)

Why?

― adam. (nordicskilla), Friday, 15 October 2004 22:02 (twenty-one years ago)

I don't think TV stars are all that. I've never been wowed by a TV star, they don't count. To me... only famous politicians really GLOW.

― andy, Friday, 15 October 2004 22:03 (twenty-one years ago)

there's a joanna newsom interview in The Onion this week, FWIW. it's not very interesting. she talks about how she got into HARP

― Helios Creed (orion), Friday, 15 October 2004 22:03 (twenty-one years ago)

i listened to a Melanie record from the late 60s this weekend that sounds EXACTLY like what i remember joanna newsom sounding like (i've only heard one song once)

― JaXoN (JasonD), Friday, 15 October 2004 22:07 (twenty-one years ago)

Great story Gear.

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Friday, 15 October 2004 22:33 (twenty-one years ago)

I like shooting the sh*t with Lot Full Man.

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Friday, 15 October 2004 22:33 (twenty-one years ago)

I still love it when Spencer censors his own f*cking posts!

― adam. (nordicskilla), Friday, 15 October 2004 22:35 (twenty-one years ago)

It's all about the (future) children (who'll surely google their old man!).

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Friday, 15 October 2004 22:52 (twenty-one years ago)

I like it when Lot Full Man comes outside and points to the sign above the door that tells people to go to the parking lot on Ivar, and everyone waits in line anyway.

― Gear! (Gear!), Friday, 15 October 2004 23:11 (twenty-one years ago)

I do this!

― Remy (x Jeremy), Friday, 15 October 2004 23:13 (twenty-one years ago)

Also, if you open the window and talk to him he sometimes lets you in, to hover around the lot waiting for the first customer to leave.

― Remy (x Jeremy), Friday, 15 October 2004 23:14 (twenty-one years ago)

One time I was coming out of that lot and some BMW decided to sneak in the exit ramp, trying to come down. The guy was all like "get out of my way!" and I just shook my head and motioned for him to back up onto Cahuenga. Lot Full Man laughed at that one.

― Gear! (Gear!), Friday, 15 October 2004 23:17 (twenty-one years ago)

Lot Full Man can be a dick, though. Some days, it's three out, one in. Maybe he's enforcing some kind of cosmic balance I'm not aware of.

― Lukas (lukas), Friday, 15 October 2004 23:25 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.mauratierney.com/newsra_k.jpg

― Pleasant Plains (Pleasant Plains), Friday, 15 October 2004 23:33 (twenty-one years ago)

Gear, what Compulsive Gamblers record were you after?

― William Crump (Rock Hardy), Friday, 15 October 2004 23:41 (twenty-one years ago)

I was seeking out Bluff City on vinyl to no avail

― Gear! (Gear!), Friday, 15 October 2004 23:49 (twenty-one years ago)

I like it when Lot Full Man comes outside and points to the sign above the door that tells people to go to the parking lot on Ivar, and everyone waits in line anyway.

that lot is always full anyway! so you're out one trip around the block plus your place in line if you're foolish enough to take the bait. that little lot was awesome for the first month or so when nobody knew about it.

i ran into ?ue$tlove in the electronica section there. i actually saw the afro first, he is surprisingly tall, and thought to myself "there is some impressive hair."

― metonymus prime (rgeary), Saturday, 16 October 2004 02:46 (twenty-one years ago)

to date I have seen Dan the Automator, Paula Abdul, Chris Noth, Maura T, and Elijah Wood at Amoeba.

― Gear! (Gear!), Saturday, 16 October 2004 02:53 (twenty-one years ago)

I did a whole tribute-to-m@ur@ thread on another message board a while ago after seeing her win at Celebrity Poker (which, yeah, she's less interesting to watch unscripted, but still). I believe I hailed her as the hottest 39-year-old on TV.

― gypsy mothra (gypsy mothra), Saturday, 16 October 2004 02:54 (twenty-one years ago)

you sir are correct

― Gear! (Gear!), Saturday, 16 October 2004 02:57 (twenty-one years ago)

Cripes, I don't think I've seen anyone famous at Amoeba. Then again, I'm not watching the people but the music.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 16 October 2004 05:10 (twenty-one years ago)

Skipping 41 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.

is it not that good William?

― Gear! (Gear!), Monday, 18 October 2004 17:29 (twenty-one years ago)

Eh... for me, the absolute document is "Gambling Days Are Over," and it's hard to get into the later stuff. It's like they got the Gamblers back together to get the Oblivians out of their system, and didn't quite manage it. I hate to say it, but there just wasn't enough alcohol consumption involved in "Bluff City."

― William Crump (Rock Hardy), Monday, 18 October 2004 19:01 (twenty-one years ago)

two months pass...

I ran into Maura Tierney *and* Ned Raggett in Chinatown last night!

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Monday, 17 January 2005 02:23 (twenty years ago)

It was a sign. What it was a sign of is as yet unknown.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 17 January 2005 02:26 (twenty years ago)

which one looked hotter?

― scott seward (scott seward), Monday, 17 January 2005 02:27 (twenty years ago)

Of us three, Spencer of course.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 17 January 2005 02:28 (twenty years ago)

But including all parties there was Lolita C. and her friend and fellow birthday celebrator D. plus all of the other people part of that crew plus all four of Spencer's friends and together there was much of the hot.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 17 January 2005 02:29 (twenty years ago)

Were you on a date with Maura Tierney?

― Leon the Fatboy (Ex Leon), Monday, 17 January 2005 05:06 (twenty years ago)

I wasn't. Ned?

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Monday, 17 January 2005 05:29 (twenty years ago)

guys this is how rumours get started.

― s1ocki (slutsky), Monday, 17 January 2005 05:33 (twenty years ago)

Look at all these rumors surroundin' Ned every day. He just needs some time, some time to get away from...

From all these rumors, He can't take it no more. His best friend said there's one out now about him and the girl next door.

― donut christ (donut), Monday, 17 January 2005 05:36 (twenty years ago)

is that true ned?

― s1ocki (slutsky), Monday, 17 January 2005 05:38 (twenty years ago)

That gave me a vision of Ned as Grandmaster Flash in the video for "The Message" - "Broken glasss, everywhere...."

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Monday, 17 January 2005 05:38 (twenty years ago)

xpost

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Monday, 17 January 2005 05:38 (twenty years ago)

don't
push
me
cuz
i'm
close
to
the
Ne-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-d

― donut christ (donut), Monday, 17 January 2005 05:41 (twenty years ago)

what's this i hear about ned knocking up maura tierney?!

― mark p (Mark P), Monday, 17 January 2005 05:41 (twenty years ago)

Ned knotted Maura Tierney up?

― donut christ (donut), Monday, 17 January 2005 05:51 (twenty years ago)

what's this i hear about ned, maura tierney and don knotts being an item?!

― mark p (Mark P), Monday, 17 January 2005 05:55 (twenty years ago)

They're down with polyamory.

― Leon the Fatboy (Ex Leon), Monday, 17 January 2005 05:57 (twenty years ago)

never heard of her.

― mark p (Mark P), Monday, 17 January 2005 05:58 (twenty years ago)

"OH, IT'S FINE, I DON'T MIND HIM GETTIN' INVOLVED. CUZ HE'Z a FROOTCAKE!"

― donut christ (donut), Monday, 17 January 2005 05:59 (twenty years ago)

http://mywebpages.comcast.net/matchgame/3x5pictures/SuzanneSomers2.jpg

"WIRE!"

― donut christ (donut), Monday, 17 January 2005 06:00 (twenty years ago)

What's this I heard about Ned tying up Lawrence Tierney to something called a "sex post"?

― Riot Gear! (Gear!), Monday, 17 January 2005 07:07 (twenty years ago)

i heard the same thing, except it was lawrence fishburne...?

― mark p (Mark P), Monday, 17 January 2005 07:16 (twenty years ago)

Ned and Martin Lawrence on a sex post with Fishbone?

― donut christ (donut), Monday, 17 January 2005 07:23 (twenty years ago)

nickalicious, ned and gowan, you heard it here first.

― mark p (Mark P), Monday, 17 January 2005 07:25 (twenty years ago)

Ned and Martin were fishing for sex in Torrance?

― MindInRewind (Barry Bruner), Monday, 17 January 2005 07:26 (twenty years ago)

there's a bittorrent seed of ned's illicit rendezvous with a fish in st. martins?

― mark p (Mark P), Monday, 17 January 2005 07:28 (twenty years ago)

purple monkey dishwasher?

― mark p (Mark P), Monday, 17 January 2005 07:28 (twenty years ago)

guys?

― mark p (Mark P), Monday, 17 January 2005 07:29 (twenty years ago)

NED's BEEN CAST AS JACK TORRANCE IN "THE SHINING 2", WITH MARTIN LAWRENCE AND MAURA TIERNEY CO-STARRING?

!

― latebloomer (latebloomer), Monday, 17 January 2005 07:32 (twenty years ago)

xxx-post

― latebloomer (latebloomer), Monday, 17 January 2005 07:35 (twenty years ago)

I see you people all lead a rich fantasy life.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 17 January 2005 08:56 (twenty years ago)

Anyway, to clear up all confusion, I was on a date with Spencer. He was a perfect gentleman.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 17 January 2005 08:57 (twenty years ago)

six years pass...

This place is over dudes! Prices jacked up, annoying! Even with Groupon and subsequent coupon for using Groupon! Records too expensive. I feel for their trick. Tim Hecker new, OK. TVPs My Dark Places - hardly a steal, but I had a GROUPON. Steve Reich Desert Music was 6 but fuck there may be a reason for that. Didn't trust this one Pharoah Sanders live thing. Decided on Black Celebration (not remastered) for $10 because I didn't want to come back at this point. I wanted cheap Dinosaur Jrs or even partway reasonable Pop Group. Anyway it was frustrating. Some other time I would have picked through the blues folk and world but the artisinal instinct is upon us so there's no colonialist plundering to be done, even there.

I may not return, in truth.

― Hollis Frampton Comes Alive! (admrl), Wednesday, 2 November 2011 23:23 (fourteen years ago)

They have no bathroom! I ask you if that's a coincidence. We won't be OCCUPYing Ivar and Sunset any time soon, my brethren. Leave that to the kids from the LA Film School.

― Hollis Frampton Comes Alive! (admrl), Wednesday, 2 November 2011 23:27 (fourteen years ago)

I just go there because they take all my promo CDs and I'm always finding something in the CD dollar bins.

― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 2 November 2011 23:28 (fourteen years ago)

I don't buy CDS, but there was one by the Beach Boys there today that looked good.

I really should own Pure Phase on vinyl, I came to think that

― Hollis Frampton Comes Alive! (admrl), Wednesday, 2 November 2011 23:29 (fourteen years ago)

lol @ flipping the folkways racks as 'colonialist plundering'

― Abattoir Educator / Slaughterman (schlump), Wednesday, 2 November 2011 23:30 (fourteen years ago)

there was a PP reish p recently iirc

― Abattoir Educator / Slaughterman (schlump), Wednesday, 2 November 2011 23:30 (fourteen years ago)

If it wasn't for YOU anglophiles, I could pick all of my teenage nostalgia up on the cheap.

― Hollis Frampton Comes Alive! (admrl), Wednesday, 2 November 2011 23:34 (fourteen years ago)

one year passes...

so will the SF amoeba be a huge letdown after the football-stadium-sized LA amoeba?

― flesh, the devil, and a wolf (wolf) (amateurist), Saturday, 6 July 2013 08:26 (twelve years ago)

three years pass...

Amoeba Hollywood is here to stay, yay!:

http://www.latimes.com/entertainment/music/la-et-ms-amoeba-music-20160913-snap-story.html

― Bee OK, Wednesday, 14 September 2016 02:41 (nine years ago)

I take dumb pride in not having set foot in there in almost 10 years

― carthago delenda est (mayor jingleberries), Wednesday, 14 September 2016 02:45 (nine years ago)

Strange thread title. If "fucking" was intended as an intensifier of "unusual", similar to "very unusual" or "totally unusual", then it is misplaced, because an "unusual fucking trip" would normally denote an unusual trip for the purpose of fucking. Since no fucking was in evidence during the trip I can only conclude that Gear! was a fucking sloppy writer.

― a little too mature to be cute (Aimless), Wednesday, 14 September 2016 03:19 (nine years ago)

http://i9.photobucket.com/albums/a94/Thalbergmad/mrlogic.jpg

― The Codling Of The London Suede (Legal Warning Across The Atlantic) (DJ Mencap), Wednesday, 14 September 2016 10:41 (nine years ago)

I can only conclude that Gear! was a fucking sloppy writer

given the legendary contents of gear's thread about his roommate getting buttsexed in the living room i'd also like to suggest that he was a sloppy fucking writer

― a very in-your-face, hard-edged machine bottom (bizarro gazzara), Thursday, 15 September 2016 12:00 (nine years ago)

Strange thread title. If "fucking" was intended as an intensifier of "unusual", similar to "very unusual" or "totally unusual", then it is misplaced, because an "unusual fucking trip" would normally denote an unusual trip for the purpose of fucking. Since no fucking was in evidence during the trip I can only conclude that Gear! was a fucking sloppy writer.

― a little too mature to be cute (Aimless), Tuesday, September 13, 2016 11:19 PM (two days ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I believe Gear!'s intention was to further emphasize the weirdness of the trip.

― Evan, Thursday, 15 September 2016 16:38 (nine years ago)

“Amoeba owned the property. They decided to sell the property. We purchased it,” he said, noting that the deal was consummated about a year ago.

― AdamVania (Adam Bruneau), Thursday, 15 September 2016 16:44 (nine years ago)

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/e/e9/The_Dead_C_-_Trapdoor_Fucking_Exit.jpg/220px-The_Dead_C_-_Trapdoor_Fucking_Exit.jpg

― slam dunk, Thursday, 15 September 2016 17:45 (nine years ago)

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