National Rail Enquiries (the UK) has moved its call centre to India and the result is now the most furstrating conversation ever.

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Goddamn. I've had to plan three long distance (UK) trips over the past 3 weeks and it's been the equivalent of smashing your head off a wall as you have to spell every last word, slowly repeat yourself and generally spend 10 minutes on the phone for a journey that is really (understandably) difficult for someone in a country that has no idea where the hell "Glamorgan" or "Dundee" even is.

Shit, imagine if I was put in charge of handling calls from Indian people wanting to know bus times around Bangladesh. I can imagine I'd be utterly useless and the end result would frustrate both myself and the person trying to plan a journey.

Thanks Tony. Push more jobs abroad eh? They work cheaper after all don't they?

― Mad Mike, Sunday, 17 October 2004 09:18 (twenty-one years ago)

use the internet site then, or better yet use the swiss or german railways then

― Ed (dali), Sunday, 17 October 2004 09:27 (twenty-one years ago)

Only idiots try to book rail tickets via telephone, before or after "outsourcing". Go to the railway station, try your best to be nice to the person at the ticket office, ie don't start ragging on them about how your education is superior to theirs or whatever, and they'll sell you the cheapest tickets.

x0x0x

― Petulant Pashmina (Pashmina), Sunday, 17 October 2004 09:35 (twenty-one years ago)

They're obliged to sell you the cheapest available ticket by law. If they don't, it's a mistake.

― Alba (Alba), Sunday, 17 October 2004 09:45 (twenty-one years ago)

Anyway, National Rail Enquiries don't sell tickets, Pashmina - that's a different service.

― Alba (Alba), Sunday, 17 October 2004 09:46 (twenty-one years ago)

Just use:

http://www.nationalrail.co.uk/planmyjourney

― Chewshabadoo (Chewshabadoo), Sunday, 17 October 2004 10:00 (twenty-one years ago)

remarkably usable site. I expected much, much less.

― Hari Ashurst (Toaster), Sunday, 17 October 2004 10:11 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.traintimes.org.uk is better.

― Alba (Alba), Sunday, 17 October 2004 10:41 (twenty-one years ago)

How telling is that misspelling in the thread title.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Sunday, 17 October 2004 10:51 (twenty-one years ago)

haha how comical you mean. furstration in the furnation.

(trying to imagine ~~calum~~ er colin er "mike" handling enquiry calls for public transport - "WHAT? YOU WANT TO GO TO LONDON!! WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO GO THERE YOU DONKEY KNOB GOBBLER HOW DARE YOU HANG UP ON ME THUS CENSORING ME HAVEN'T YOU READ "SEXUAL PERSONAE" THUS PROVING YOU ARE ILL EQUIPPED TO DEBATE WITH ONE WHO'S EDUCATION IS..... (etc etc et not the most productive worwker in the callcentre I ph34r)

― Pashmina (Pashmina), Sunday, 17 October 2004 11:10 (twenty-one years ago)

.... I was thinking more along the lines of "What colour panties are you wearing?"

― Serghei Daduismus (Dada), Sunday, 17 October 2004 11:11 (twenty-one years ago)

Ned Ragget is fat and still looking for girls to F*ck on Friendster.

Anyway, my point is that it's a disgrace that we're laying people off in order to give fat cats more money and pay people in a third world country less cash for a service that they cannot deliver nearly as well.

― Mad Mike, Sunday, 17 October 2004 11:14 (twenty-one years ago)

Is that how you lost our job then?

― Serghei Daduismus (Dada), Sunday, 17 October 2004 11:18 (twenty-one years ago)

Haha. Ownage on a sunday dinnertime = classic.

― Pashmina (Pashmina), Sunday, 17 October 2004 11:19 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.globalhermit.com/ilx/ccc.jpg

Calum Robert Waddell is a small headed racist fascist illiterate tory pig.

Calum Robert Waddell is a small headed racist fascist illiterate tory pig.
Calum Robert Waddell is a small headed racist fascist illiterate tory pig.
Calum Robert Waddell is a small headed racist fascist illiterate tory pig.

http://www.globalhermit.com/ilx/ccc.jpg

Cheerio!

― Mad . Mike, Sunday, 17 October 2004 11:22 (twenty-one years ago)

Terms like "cash" make you look real worldly and cool

― Andrew Blood Thames (Andrew Thames), Sunday, 17 October 2004 11:29 (twenty-one years ago)

Yeah, someone who is utterly disgraced at the low levels of wages and long, non-unionised working hours in third world countries is "racist". What fucking planet are you on? I guess all of us lefty liberal types should instead embrace the fact that people in third world countries are hired, for little pay, to do jobs that are inevitably going to be difficult. Read my initial post you small minded fuckwitt: Could I do the same position for a customer in India? Unlikely.

― Mad Mike., Sunday, 17 October 2004 12:00 (twenty-one years ago)

This forum never ceases to surprise me with its small minded opinions and the fact that all you assholes probably put your little cross next to Blair or Howard anyway. i'd like to see how many of you so called lefties really do swing to the left and have humanity and compassion.

― Mad Mike., Sunday, 17 October 2004 12:01 (twenty-one years ago)

Read my initial post you small minded fuckwitt: Could I do the same position for a customer in India? Unlikely

...especially since you were actually talking about train times in Bangladesh. Or is it OK to have Bangladeshi customer services outsourced to India as well?

― ailsa (ailsa), Sunday, 17 October 2004 12:05 (twenty-one years ago)

It was simply an example of an area I'm unfaimiliar with, albeit one that is especially exploited by the West. I could just have easily said Delhi (where I believe the new call centre is for the rail enquiries), Seoul or Taiwan.
P.S. The person who keeps registering my name has too much time on his hands and is, well, really sad. What a waste of time.

― Mad .Mike.., Sunday, 17 October 2004 12:14 (twenty-one years ago)

this thread is shocking - whoever turned it in to another excuse to hate on callum should be ashamed.

― jed_ (jed), Sunday, 17 October 2004 12:15 (twenty-one years ago)

The service is rubbish more times than not of late - when you're not trying to buy, but trying to find routes, I'm finding it virtually impossible to get the information I want as the operators are working to a script that probably works for say 80% of enquiries:

- Customer asked where they are travelling from, and where to, and what time; database queried, results given.

But if it's a mixture of price and time (ie, I want to go to Preston via Leeds as I have a meeting Leeds, but ultimately will make my journey on an evaluation of the time and inconvenience and cost. It's practically impossible to get good service here though, as the operators just don't know the UK rail system to help you. When it was based in Newcastle, it wasn't hugely better, but occasionally, you got someone who knew their onions, as opposed to never geting anyone who does.

― Dave B (daveb), Sunday, 17 October 2004 12:21 (twenty-one years ago)

Thanks for the last two posts. I have a cross country train journey to make this week and the information I have been given has been useless and no one can tell me how long anything takes. If anyone can help here - how long does it take to travel from London Kings Cross to Liverpool St?

Cheers.

― .Mad .Mike, Sunday, 17 October 2004 12:28 (twenty-one years ago)

Allow at least half an hour. It's the Circle Lline, which isn't the most frequent of tube lines.

― Alba (Alba), Sunday, 17 October 2004 12:54 (twenty-one years ago)

(will probably take more like 15-20 mins)

― Alba (Alba), Sunday, 17 October 2004 12:58 (twenty-one years ago)

Yeah, but don't all the Hammersmith & City/Metropolitan trains run on that part of the line too? So service more frequent than Alba implies.

― Mooro (Mooro), Sunday, 17 October 2004 13:04 (twenty-one years ago)

Ah yes - you're right. How soon I forget.

― Alba (Alba), Sunday, 17 October 2004 13:07 (twenty-one years ago)

They're obliged to sell you the cheapest available ticket by law.

They're allowed to sell you the cheapest available ticket, yes. However, there are often circumstances where it's cheaper to buy a pair of tickets, or more, together.* Staff aren't obliged to search for those (because it would be far too complicated), but friendly staff may well offer you it.

* ie, if you're going from A to C via B, it can sometimes be cheaper to buy one ticket from A to B and another from B to C.

― caitlin (caitlin), Sunday, 17 October 2004 17:03 (twenty-one years ago)

Oh, that's interesting. Fare structures are so annoying these days. I've found it cheaper to get two singles than a return when visting London recently (booking 2-3 weeks in advance). thetrainline.com did suggest this.

― Alba (Alba), Sunday, 17 October 2004 17:07 (twenty-one years ago)

FOr the information of Mad Mike:

The call centres in India provide jobs at far above average pay, to university graduates who are far better educated than the employees of call centres over here. Admittedly it doesn't help the service like a good knowledge of the railways would but I don't recall any of the UK staff having one of those either.

― Ed (dali), Sunday, 17 October 2004 17:11 (twenty-one years ago)

We don't even have an outsourced rail query line over here. We're lucky to still *have* trains, let alone find out when they run.

― Lara (Lara), Sunday, 17 October 2004 18:46 (twenty-one years ago)

Thanks to the people who gave me directions there.

Indian students coming out of university and working (for low pay presumably otherwise why ship jobs abroad) in a train call centre is quite a sad thought. Whatever the case is, it makes the service extremely difficult (try getting train directions in a Scottish accent, pronouncing the names of stations that even the Geordies used to ask you to spell) and it's left a lot of people unemployed. All I know is that I wouldn't use this phone service again as it's been an utter nightmare for me.

― Mad Mike..., Sunday, 17 October 2004 19:43 (twenty-one years ago)

hey, dude, you gonna be in glasgow, anytime soon?

― RJG (RJG), Sunday, 17 October 2004 19:44 (twenty-one years ago)

The cost of living is much lower in India, Mike. Therefore they can pay wages that are very good in India (thus attractive to graduates) but low when converted into Sterling.

― Alba (Alba), Sunday, 17 October 2004 21:41 (twenty-one years ago)

After tonight, I hope I never get on a train again. I phoned National Rail Enquiries three times today and none of the people sounded like they were Indian, although they were extremely rubbish and told me the wrong things.

― Cathy (Cathy), Sunday, 17 October 2004 21:51 (twenty-one years ago)

Oh dear, Cathy. Ring me in future.

― Alba (Alba), Sunday, 17 October 2004 21:52 (twenty-one years ago)

she has a fancy phone but not that fancy.

― RJG (RJG), Sunday, 17 October 2004 22:03 (twenty-one years ago)

I think you, or at least someone, should provide a rescue service like the AA, but for people stuck on station platforms eating 60p crisps and waiting for miserable trains that don't come, or when they do come are full of drunks and screaming children.

Bah.

― Cathy (Cathy), Sunday, 17 October 2004 22:09 (twenty-one years ago)

You can't stop drunks and screaming children using trains. Though perhaps they could have dedicated carriages.

― Alba (Alba), Sunday, 17 October 2004 22:39 (twenty-one years ago)

We used to call it 'the smoking carriage'.

― Dave B (daveb), Sunday, 17 October 2004 23:00 (twenty-one years ago)

How quaint.

― Alba (Alba), Sunday, 17 October 2004 23:06 (twenty-one years ago)

On Friday night, returning from the Bath Beer Festival, the conductor scoured the train to find extra people so he could sell us a group ticket and save us money. You don't get enough staff like that any more.

When we got off at Temple Meads they'd opened the barriers, however, so the cheapest option would have been for him not to sell us a ticket at all. Particularly since he trusted our slightly more drunk mate who "had a ticket somewhere. It's in one of these pockets..." (he found it in the taxi)

― aldo_cowpat (aldo_cowpat), Monday, 18 October 2004 08:34 (twenty-one years ago)

i like how madmike thinks that indian call centre staff know less about the railway network than uk call centre staff. and that all call centre staff from uk understand scottish accent.

― ken c (ken c), Monday, 18 October 2004 08:54 (twenty-one years ago)

YAWN

― jed_ (jed), Monday, 18 October 2004 09:26 (twenty-one years ago)

how much more desperate can the put-downs get?

― jed_ (jed), Monday, 18 October 2004 09:29 (twenty-one years ago)

exactly

― ken c (ken c), Monday, 18 October 2004 09:29 (twenty-one years ago)

yours i meant.

― jed_ (jed), Monday, 18 October 2004 09:30 (twenty-one years ago)

yet oddly it applies both ways.

― ken c (ken c), Monday, 18 October 2004 09:33 (twenty-one years ago)

except i don't understand what put downs i was supposed to have implied.. apart from maybe stating that madmike is wrong once again?

― ken c (ken c), Monday, 18 October 2004 09:36 (twenty-one years ago)

I don't know Ken - in your situation I thought you'd be saying something along the lines of "I could work at Railway Enquiries in the UK or Hong Kong! ph34r me!"

― MarkH (MarkH), Monday, 18 October 2004 09:40 (twenty-one years ago)

Skipping 113 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.

it might have been better with a midget to keep you company.

― jed_ (jed), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 10:29 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm sure you still can go from Euston and Tamworth direct, now that i know that Tamworth is on the westcoast line, i'm sure there'd be some trains that'd go direct to tamworth (stopping a few stations on the way). I'm sad to hear about the violence in Tamworth pubs though.

― ken c (ken c), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 10:30 (twenty-one years ago)

Alternatively, and I'm entering the realm of speculation here, you may be able to change at that place where the trains split up, one end going to Glasgow, the other end going to Edinburgh. I can't remember what it's called, sorry. I think it begins with 's'.

Carstairs? No.

Carlisle? Yes.

(the only trains that split/join at Carstairs nowadays are the Glasgow/Edinburgh to London sleepers. But that's irrelevant, because you can't get from there to Kilmarnock without going through Glasgow anyway)

― caitlin (caitlin), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 10:35 (twenty-one years ago)

Euston to Tamworth tomorrow, without changing: 15:45, 17:18, 18:45, 19:45, 22:05.

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 10:37 (twenty-one years ago)

Carstairs. How could I forget? Sounds a bit like Carsmile.

That'd be Cambridge - Liverpool via Peterborough, Leicester and all that shite. I suppose it starts at.... STANSTEAD. Hang on, no it wouldn't. What I lack in accuracy, I make up for in enthusiasm.

I've spent many miserable hours stuck at Nuneaton. Last time there was a bloke dressed as a clown collecting money for a children's home or something. It was bloody freezing, and I was stuck long enough to eventually give him some money out of guilt. They have a little cafe that sells trainspotter things.

I don't know how I managed to ignore this thread all day yesterday.

I think all my cousins have been beaten up in Tamworth, usually by numerous assailants. There's a nice pub called The Albert near the station though.

― PJ Miller (PJ Miller), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 10:38 (twenty-one years ago)

I spent an hour without money on Nuneaton platform in 1998. It wasn't fun. But I notice lots of work on the station which is good to see; I beam as a Labour Party member at this.

What's that pub you can see opposite Stafford station? I always notice it, and resolve to one day have a drink in, but suspect it might be rub.

When I think of Tamworth, I always think of Robert Peel and his manifesto.

― Dave B (daveb), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 10:55 (twenty-one years ago)

I remember the pub that used to be inside the tube station at Knightsbridge...

― mark grout (mark grout), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 11:08 (twenty-one years ago)

There used to be a Berni Inn called The Peel. Steak, they had. I don't know the pub in Stafford, but I have seen them working at Nuneaton, more than a year ago now. And on a Saturday, no less. Bob Marley played *twice* in Stafford.

― PJ Miller (PJ Miller), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 11:12 (twenty-one years ago)

Do every set of travelling football fans in the country have to go through Milton Keynes Central? It's like the Premiership Parliament there at 6pm on a Saturday.

The coffee shops there are rubbish as well.

― Chairman ROFLMAO (Dom Passantino), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 11:15 (twenty-one years ago)

AARGH THIS IS THE THREAD FOR ME! It took me five hours to get from Glasgow to Durham on Satuday (Glasgow - Edinburgh - Carlisle(!!) - Newcastle - Durham) thanks to the Indian lady who told me to go via Edinburgh the night before when I decided to be responsible and check train times rather than just showing up at the station. No mention that the East Coast Line is k-fucked north of Newcastle every weekend until further notice. No mention at all.

― Madchen (Madchen), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 11:15 (twenty-one years ago)

See what happens when you post in a rush without reading the whole thread?

― Madchen (Madchen), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 11:29 (twenty-one years ago)

Will computers understand people from Kirkcaldy any better than Indians?

― Onimo (GerryNemo), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 11:34 (twenty-one years ago)

There's a Scottish 118 number, isn't there? I saw an advert on the bus that read "Mill Guy? Where's that?" or something.

― Madchen (Madchen), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 11:36 (twenty-one years ago)

There's at least one; I saw it advertised on the back of an Edinburgh bus with a picture of a man in a kilt flashing his arse.

― caitlin (caitlin), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 11:38 (twenty-one years ago)

I got the Newcastle - Carlisle (??!!) - Edinburgh train on Sunday and it took so long that I missed the pub quiz and dinner. This was thanks to a (not-Indian) call centre man who told me that there was a train straight from Sheffield to Haymarket but there wasn't at all.

― Cathy (Cathy), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 11:38 (twenty-one years ago)

Will computers understand people from Kirkcaldy any better than Indians?
-- Onimo (gerry.wat...), October 20th, 2004 12:34 PM. (later)

maybe as long as the programming isn't outsourced to india.

― ken c (ken c), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 11:42 (twenty-one years ago)

we talk C++ so much better here in the uk.

― ken c (ken c), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 11:44 (twenty-one years ago)

wtf? Birmingham New St is a brilliant train station, Crewe is the ultimate fave though coz everyone has to change there at some point in their life.

― Ste (Fuzzy), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 11:53 (twenty-one years ago)

In a way I'm glad I went via Carlisle - the line to Newcastle is one of the prettiest I've taken, even if the train is a bit rickety.

― Madchen (Madchen), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 11:56 (twenty-one years ago)

I jackpotted the fruit machine at Crewe the other week! The woman in the cafe bit wouldn't let me change my 50 pound coins into notes unless I bought something.

― Chairman ROFLMAO (Dom Passantino), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 11:57 (twenty-one years ago)

I got it after dark, so there was not even the consolation of scenery. I did get free tea and biscuits though.

― Cathy (Cathy), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 12:03 (twenty-one years ago)

I was going to Excelsior Alba's comments on this thread but I cracked up at som many of his comments I can't cut and paste them all!

― Markelby (Mark C), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 12:05 (twenty-one years ago)

Birmingham New Street sucks ass. I spent a night there after drunkenly falling asleep and waking up on a terminating service there. Wanted to sleep in the bogs (warmer) but the killjpys wouldn't let us. Ended up on a platform where it was uber-cold.

There's probably a better thread for this; I can't believe there not been a thread on favourite UK train stations, he said expectantly for some less busy to find this thread.

― Dave B (daveb), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 12:24 (twenty-one years ago)

Sorry about the pig confusion.

― Alba (Alba), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 12:29 (twenty-one years ago)

Don't worry, I was very excited when I saw the title. Of the Tamworth Two. I'm sure I've biggied up B'Ham New St elsewhere, it depends on my mood.

― PJ Miller (PJ Miller), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 12:33 (twenty-one years ago)

How can you talk about Tamworth without mentioning Julian Cope? He was the king of Tamworth! Wasn't he?

― Pete W (peterw), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 12:36 (twenty-one years ago)

You're thinking of Ethelfleda*, King of Mercia, who built his castle where the Anker meets the Tame.

*I think.

― PJ Miller (PJ Miller), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 12:46 (twenty-one years ago)

that north-east coast line is wonderful isn't it Madchen?

― jed_ (jed), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 14:15 (twenty-one years ago)

Yes, when it isn't closed. I like the red and white lighthouse view best.

― Madchen (Madchen), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 15:17 (twenty-one years ago)

I got the Newcastle - Carlisle (??!!) - Edinburgh train on Sunday and it took so long that I missed the pub quiz and dinner.

Ooo, which pub quiz do you go to?

― caitlin (caitlin), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 18:11 (twenty-one years ago)

I like it too, but it makes me cross that the Glasgow-Edinburgh leg is so slow.

― Alba (Alba), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 18:15 (twenty-one years ago)

(if you can call it a leg. Maybe it's more of an appendix)

― Alba (Alba), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 18:15 (twenty-one years ago)

I go to a (quite hard, I think) pub quiz at Hubbard's, in Glasgow. I am usually pleased with myself if I know one question that no one else in the team does. That happens sometimes.

― Cathy (Cathy), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 18:25 (twenty-one years ago)

Before I read this thread I had no idea that Caitlin and Callum were the same person, so in that respect it has been enlightening. IMHO the best station to get stuck at is Grantham, coz it has a Connect Four machine in the cafeteria.

― MarkH (MarkH), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 20:21 (twenty-one years ago)

It's news to me, I have to say.

― caitlin (caitlin), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 20:25 (twenty-one years ago)

haha - that thought passed through my head too i must admit!

― jed_ (jed), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 20:28 (twenty-one years ago)

hubbard's isn't as hard, as it is stupid.

I don't know where tamworth is.

― RJG (RJG), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 20:45 (twenty-one years ago)

It's news to me, I have to say

hmmm, are you like Tony Etoria, or indeed Phil Fearon and Galaxy? Can you *prove* it?

― MarkH (MarkH), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 21:00 (twenty-one years ago)

I have seen so little of the United Kingdom. I am ashamed and regretful.

― adam. (nordicskilla), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 21:04 (twenty-one years ago)

*I* can't prove it; but anyone who has access to this site's logfiles and posters' IP addresses can.

― caitlin (caitlin), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 21:07 (twenty-one years ago)

haha.

I have met caitlin but I have not met calum, so far.

― RJG (RJG), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 21:08 (twenty-one years ago)

don't be so sure.

― jed_ (jed), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 21:11 (twenty-one years ago)

that's very shrewd.

― RJG (RJG), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 21:12 (twenty-one years ago)

i'm clever that way.

― jed_ (jed), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 21:12 (twenty-one years ago)

but anyone who has access to this site's logfiles and posters' IP addresses can

no, they can prove that you have yr "Caitlin computer" and yr "Callum computer", they can't prove that you are different ppl.

― MarkH (MarkH), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 21:21 (twenty-one years ago)

stop windin'm up.

― RJG (RJG), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 21:23 (twenty-one years ago)

why RJG? It's fun.

― MarkH (MarkH), Saturday, 23 October 2004 12:14 (twenty-one years ago)

What is that? A slogan?

― Alba (Alba), Saturday, 23 October 2004 12:19 (twenty-one years ago)

bit late to the aprty but Okay, I've just phoned national rail enquiries out of curiosity and unless Indian call centres are currently employing Mancs then the entire premise of this thread is wrong. i was thinking the same thing, i always get people with northern accents. according to the PR seems like there is a centre in Mumbai, alongside one in S Yorks.

― ambrose (ambrose), Saturday, 23 October 2004 16:38 (twenty-one years ago)

I think there was talk, up thread, about the times of the day one is likely to get connected to India rather than the UK.

― Alba (Alba), Saturday, 23 October 2004 16:42 (twenty-one years ago)

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