why is it not ok for me to date two people at once?

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what ever happened to "dating"?

― cutty (mcutt), Monday, 25 October 2004 10:30 (twenty-one years ago)

who says it's not ok?

― Freelance Hiveminder (blueski), Monday, 25 October 2004 10:32 (twenty-one years ago)

Depends on your definition of "dating" - and oh no, don't start that all up again.

― Kissing Time At The Pleasure Unit (kate), Monday, 25 October 2004 10:34 (twenty-one years ago)

everyone else says it's not ok. and sometimes the girls i'm dating.

― cutty (mcutt), Monday, 25 October 2004 10:34 (twenty-one years ago)

Well, if it's not okay to the ones you date, you don't have much choice, do you?

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Monday, 25 October 2004 10:35 (twenty-one years ago)

Well, as far as I'm concerned, if you start sleeping with one person, you shouldn't be sleeping with anyone else.

If dating just means getting together for dinner or other activities that don't imply romantic or sexual contact, then there's no reason that you shouldn't "date" more than one person. But really only until you settle on one of those people.

― Kissing Time At The Pleasure Unit (kate), Monday, 25 October 2004 10:37 (twenty-one years ago)

Just don't lie to anyone, mislead them, use them or fuck them over. You'll know when you're overstepping a line,

― Markelby (Mark C), Monday, 25 October 2004 10:42 (twenty-one years ago)

I thought this was called "seeing" people but whatever. You should just find girls that want to do likewise.

― Laura E (laurae55), Monday, 25 October 2004 10:42 (twenty-one years ago)

kate: it seems your definition of dating is also called "friends"

markelby: i try very hard to abide by those rules

― cutty (mcutt), Monday, 25 October 2004 10:44 (twenty-one years ago)

You'll know when you're overstepping a line,

You know, if ONLY this were the case, then there wouldn't be half the heartbreak in the world today...

Most people are not psychic, and don't actually know when they are stepping over someone else's line.

It's really better to talk to your dates/potential dates about this sort of thing, ask them what their ideas of exclusivity are. Plus, don't lie to or mislead people. That's just called being a decent human being.

― Kissing Time At The Pleasure Unit (kate), Monday, 25 October 2004 10:45 (twenty-one years ago)

x-post, if your question is really "why is it not OK for me to FUCK two people at once" then that's a different question.

No, it would not be OK for me. Nor, obviously, for the girls you're talking to. Some people are into that polyamourous stuff, to each their own.

― Kissing Time At The Pleasure Unit (kate), Monday, 25 October 2004 10:46 (twenty-one years ago)

kate: it seems your definition of dating is also called "friends"

Also, that's just not true.

"dating" != synonymous with "sleeping with".

I've dated people I've never slept with. I've slept with people I've never dated.

― Kissing Time At The Pleasure Unit (kate), Monday, 25 October 2004 10:49 (twenty-one years ago)

b honest-use protection-quit bragging

― lukey (Lukey G), Monday, 25 October 2004 11:45 (twenty-one years ago)

LOCK THREAD.

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Monday, 25 October 2004 11:46 (twenty-one years ago)

Yeah, I think it's worse for someone you're casually dating to assume you're not seeing anyone else without making their ideas of your supposed exclusivity known to you.

― roxymuzak (roxymuzak), Monday, 25 October 2004 12:51 (twenty-one years ago)

HA.

I repeat...HA!

― ALLMUSIC.COM (ddb), Monday, 25 October 2004 13:55 (twenty-one years ago)

HI DERE

― sometimes i like to pretend i am very small and warm (ex machina), Monday, 25 October 2004 14:00 (twenty-one years ago)

"dating"

― ALLMUSIC.COM (ddb), Monday, 25 October 2004 14:04 (twenty-one years ago)

i like dating! i feel like i'm in the 50's.

― cutty (mcutt), Monday, 25 October 2004 14:05 (twenty-one years ago)

DOOD. U ARE FULL OF TEH SHIT.

1 girl is your ex, that sneaks into your bed at 4am for DRUNKEN CONGRESS.

teh other girl is a clueless simp.

― ALLMUSIC.COM (ddb), Monday, 25 October 2004 14:07 (twenty-one years ago)

oh my, that is not nice. plz lock thread.

― cutty (mcutt), Monday, 25 October 2004 14:07 (twenty-one years ago)

FLIP FLOPPER.

― ALLMUSIC.COM (ddb), Monday, 25 October 2004 14:07 (twenty-one years ago)

MIXED MESSAGES.

― ALLMUSIC.COM (ddb), Monday, 25 October 2004 14:08 (twenty-one years ago)

MIXED MASSAGES.

― ALLMUSIC.COM (ddb), Monday, 25 October 2004 14:09 (twenty-one years ago)

MAXED OUT MASSAGES

― cutty (mcutt), Monday, 25 October 2004 14:10 (twenty-one years ago)

i miss you two!

― lauren (laurenp), Monday, 25 October 2004 14:14 (twenty-one years ago)

i miss u too LP x 1,000,000,000

― ALLMUSIC.COM (ddb), Monday, 25 October 2004 14:17 (twenty-one years ago)

oh, i'm also dating lauren

― cutty (mcutt), Monday, 25 October 2004 14:17 (twenty-one years ago)

where were you last night, anyway?

― lauren (laurenp), Monday, 25 October 2004 14:18 (twenty-one years ago)

There's nothing wrong with it, as long as all parties are cognizant of the situation and are cool with it. But good luck making that happen!

I've known two separate people who have dated two people at once. In one of the cases, I'm pretty sure that the two datees weren't wholly aware of each other; in the second case, the datees knew about each other but there was massive jealousy and plenty o' tears.

― jaymc (jaymc), Monday, 25 October 2004 14:19 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.deutsches-filminstitut.de/caligari/dp2fc4839.jpg

― sometimes i like to pretend i am very small and warm (ex machina), Monday, 25 October 2004 14:19 (twenty-one years ago)

where were you last night, anyway?

i was at home, crying in a law book

― cutty (mcutt), Monday, 25 October 2004 14:21 (twenty-one years ago)

as long as you two are just friends.

― lauren (laurenp), Monday, 25 October 2004 14:23 (twenty-one years ago)

i like dating! i feel like i'm in the 50's.

You antique dawg.

― B.A.R.M.S. (Barima), Monday, 25 October 2004 14:24 (twenty-one years ago)

YO I WOULD DAET HILLARY DUFF

― sometimes i like to pretend i am very small and warm (ex machina), Monday, 25 October 2004 14:25 (twenty-one years ago)

This is the stuff that low-rent TV shows are made of.

― Chewshabadoo (Chewshabadoo), Monday, 25 October 2004 14:26 (twenty-one years ago)

So the noize board is down, right?

― Markelby (Mark C), Monday, 25 October 2004 14:49 (twenty-one years ago)

i'm sorry that a discussion i start will elicit responses from associates of mine. i'm sorry that you had to read this thread, mark c.

i'm sorry.

(eat shit)

― cutty (mcutt), Monday, 25 October 2004 14:54 (twenty-one years ago)

Ah fuck off you goldfish-brained loser. You and your little fucking vandal dickhead friends can just shove your ADD druggie toss up your collective arses. Fuck off back to BRIGHT COLOURS AND CAPITAL LETTERS WORLD and everyone'll be happier. Dick.

― Markelby (Mark C), Monday, 25 October 2004 15:01 (twenty-one years ago)

is it not ok to post on two msg boards at once?

― Freelance Hiveminder (blueski), Monday, 25 October 2004 15:02 (twenty-one years ago)

HA.

― ALLMUSIC.COM (ddb), Monday, 25 October 2004 15:02 (twenty-one years ago)

why is it not ok to post on two message boards at once.

discuss.

― ken c (ken c), Monday, 25 October 2004 15:05 (twenty-one years ago)

xpost!!

― ken c (ken c), Monday, 25 October 2004 15:05 (twenty-one years ago)

mark, you've got some serious issues. i post like a normal person on this board. i'm also allowed to post on ILM and my opinions hold equal weight. i don't this thread is bothering anyone else but you. don't read it.

― cutty (mcutt), Monday, 25 October 2004 15:05 (twenty-one years ago)

let's date, stevem

― ken c (ken c), Monday, 25 October 2004 15:06 (twenty-one years ago)

ken: that seems to be what mark is implying. this board is HIS.

― cutty (mcutt), Monday, 25 October 2004 15:06 (twenty-one years ago)

ILX IS FUN TODAY!

YAY!!!!!!!!!

― ALLMUSIC.COM (ddb), Monday, 25 October 2004 15:07 (twenty-one years ago)

also, it's like saying someone who posts on a sheelfuxor/mongrel thread shouldn't post anywhere else.

― cutty (mcutt), Monday, 25 October 2004 15:07 (twenty-one years ago)

It's not just this thread. It's about two dozen of them, all in the last few days, all full of nonsensical one-liners and infinitely repeated pictures. Now you have your own sandpit to play in, why do you have to do it here?*

*I don't mean when you or Jon or whoever posts like normal people obviously.

― Markelby (Mark C), Monday, 25 October 2004 15:08 (twenty-one years ago)

mark's problem is that he is generally a happy dude with a happy life. thus he finds it difficult to identify stuff to get angry about, resulting in you little rascals taking the brunt of some otherwise indisposable energy. it's true guv.

― Dr Fraud (blueski), Monday, 25 October 2004 15:08 (twenty-one years ago)

Skipping 57 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.

No Calum. You don't hate Holly Valance; you just fail, consistently and unabashedly to accord her gender with ANY respect at all that goes beyond how nice their tits are. Who would you rescue from a burning building - a woman or a cat?

― Markelby (Mark C), Monday, 25 October 2004 16:27 (twenty-one years ago)

misogynistic means having japanese food on a pommel horse. you dumbasses.

― ken c (ken c), Monday, 25 October 2004 16:28 (twenty-one years ago)

misogynistic is HATRED OF WOMEN

Precisely.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 25 October 2004 16:42 (twenty-one years ago)

misogynistic means having japanese food on a pommel horse

sorry ken had japanese food in his mouth. what he was trying to say was "misogynistic means having japanese food and I pummel whores."

― manthony m1cc1o (Anthony Miccio), Monday, 25 October 2004 16:43 (twenty-one years ago)

Mark with respect you know better than to think of 'Mad Mike' as anything other than a cariacture with little basis in reality re what the character posts here.

― Freelance Hiveminder (blueski), Monday, 25 October 2004 17:02 (twenty-one years ago)

Well Mark, that really all depends on how Holly Valance chooses to present herself doesn't it? If she, by chance, chooses to pose semi-nude for lads mags, make explicit comments about her sexual likings and strip off in her videos then I would imagine judging her by her body is all fine and well. If, on the other hand, she was to lend her talents to healing sick children in third world countries ala Audrey Hepburn or offered to become the face of a movement against animal abuse ala Pamela Anderson perhaps I'd have more aspects with which to judge her.

But, hey, we all look at good looking women as sex objects. I love it when guys do it with my girlfriend - approaching her in a bar or whatever. Good stuff. She's a good looking girl and I'm glad that other men find her attractive. I like being chatted up too. It's flattering. One year another girl sent me a Valentines Day card and it was kinda cool. My loyalty is to my partner, though, and vice versa. But if she wants to comment on how fit Keanu Reeves is, and ask me to sit through (God forbid) The Matrix then why not? I know by now that at the end of the evening I'm the only one who gets a look in.

― Mad.Mike, Monday, 25 October 2004 17:12 (twenty-one years ago)

Oh - and your reply Mark, would still indicate sexism and not misogyny.

― Mad.Mike, Monday, 25 October 2004 17:13 (twenty-one years ago)

This is part of the 99% you post that isn't serious, of course.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 25 October 2004 17:15 (twenty-one years ago)

No Ned, i'm being serious just now. You should be able to tell when I'm looking for a rise. It's not hard.

― Mad.Mike, Monday, 25 October 2004 17:16 (twenty-one years ago)

The only time you've looked for a rise is yourself when you go on about my Friendster profile.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 25 October 2004 17:18 (twenty-one years ago)

why would you look for a rise? here? deliberately trying to annoy people is a waste of your time no matter how much you think they 'deserve' to be annoyed. silly man.

xpost

― Freelance Hiveminder (blueski), Monday, 25 October 2004 17:19 (twenty-one years ago)

as for the idea of being comfortable with guys constantly hitting on your girlfriend...i'm not sure it's scientifically possible to be THAT confident and secure AND spend as much time as you on message boards. i call fibbery.

― Freelance Hiveminder (blueski), Monday, 25 October 2004 17:21 (twenty-one years ago)

You can call what you want mate. I'm telling you the truth.

Ned, I never wanted to enter into any shit with you in the first place. You seemed to have it in for me as far as I can see.

― Mad.Mike, Monday, 25 October 2004 17:25 (twenty-one years ago)

this is his truth...

― Freelance Hiveminder (blueski), Monday, 25 October 2004 17:27 (twenty-one years ago)

Ned, I never wanted to enter into any shit with you in the first place.

This isn't serious either.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 25 October 2004 17:27 (twenty-one years ago)

If hospitals cure
Then prisons must bring their pain
Do not be ashamed to slaughter
The centre of humanity is cruelty
There is never redemption
Any fool can regret yesterday
Nail it to the house of lords
You will be buried in the same box as a killer, as a killer, as a killer
A drained white body hanging from the gallows
Is more righteous that hindley’s crotchet lectures
Pain not penance, forget martyrs, remember victims
The weak die young and right now we crouch to make them strong
Kill yeltsin, who’s saying? zhirinovsky, le pen, hindley and brady, ireland, allit, sutcliffe, dahmer, nielson, yoshinori ueda, blanche and pickles, amin, milosovic
Give them respect they deserve
Give them the respect they deserve
Execution needed
A bloody vessel for your peace
If man makes death then death makes man
Tear the torso with horses and chains
Killers view themselves like they view the world, they pick at the holes
Not punish less, rise the pain
Sterilise rapists, all I preach is extinction
Kill yeltsin, who’s saying? zhirinovsky, le pen, hindley and brady, ireland, allit, sutcliffe, dahmer, nielson, yoshinori ueda, blanche and pickles, amin, milosovic
Give them respect they deserve
Give them the respect they deserve
Give them the respect they deserve
Give them the respect they deserve.

― Leon Czolgosz (Nicole), Monday, 25 October 2004 17:34 (twenty-one years ago)

cutty, what have you done????

― tokyo rosemary (rosemary), Monday, 25 October 2004 17:56 (twenty-one years ago)

not what TR, who!!

― ALLMUSIC.COM (ddb), Monday, 25 October 2004 18:16 (twenty-one years ago)

Girls only like cars and money.

― Misogyny Mike (shmuel), Monday, 25 October 2004 18:52 (twenty-one years ago)

Then why do they want to date cutty?

― tokyo rosemary (rosemary), Monday, 25 October 2004 18:55 (twenty-one years ago)

megazing

― Freelance Hiveminder (blueski), Monday, 25 October 2004 19:02 (twenty-one years ago)

zing of kings

― roxymuzak (roxymuzak), Monday, 25 October 2004 19:05 (twenty-one years ago)

Oh wait, am I supposed to keep teh zing on the bright colored world of the noize board?

― tokyo rosemary (rosemary), Monday, 25 October 2004 19:12 (twenty-one years ago)

we'll let it pass this time

― Freelance Hiveminder (blueski), Monday, 25 October 2004 19:14 (twenty-one years ago)

cutty's car is AWESOME. spinny rims and everything.

and his wrists and fingers are hella FROSTED.

― ALLMUSIC.COM (ddb), Monday, 25 October 2004 19:18 (twenty-one years ago)

Ice white shoes, Ice white socks.

― ALLMUSIC.COM (ddb), Monday, 25 October 2004 19:25 (twenty-one years ago)

i have a car and the potential for money$$$.

― cutty (mcutt), Monday, 25 October 2004 19:29 (twenty-one years ago)

CUTTY, IS ONE OF TEH GIRLS in the bad band?

were you carrying a teddy bear and candy heart for her in the front row?

― Carey (Carey), Monday, 25 October 2004 21:35 (twenty-one years ago)

no, that is my ex-girlfriend who i DO NOT have relations with.

― cutty (mcutt), Monday, 25 October 2004 22:48 (twenty-one years ago)

Dude this thread just made me really irritable and it has nothing to do with cutty. cutty, date all of the ladies, I think it's ok as long as no one is under the impression that you are exclusive to them.

― Allyzay Science Explosion (allyzay), Monday, 25 October 2004 23:15 (twenty-one years ago)

THANK YOU ALLY

― cutty (mcutt), Monday, 25 October 2004 23:21 (twenty-one years ago)

cue James Bond theme

― Freelance Hiveminder (blueski), Tuesday, 26 October 2004 08:41 (twenty-one years ago)

the trick is to get a reputation for dating *more* than 2 people at once, so that way the people involved will be pleasantly surprised that there is only one other person in your dating life.

um, i don't know this from experience, or anything.

there's plenty of sensible advice among the annoying stuff on this thread: make an effort not to be hurtful, be honest and straightforward, and be sympathetic to the fact that they might not be as comfortable with the situation as you, and therefore might not be ok with dealing with it indefinitely.

― colette (a2lette), Tuesday, 26 October 2004 08:59 (twenty-one years ago)

the trick is to get a reputation for dating *more* than 2 people at once, so that way the people involved will be pleasantly surprised that there is only one other person in your dating life.

best logic ever

― Freelance Hiveminder (blueski), Tuesday, 26 October 2004 09:05 (twenty-one years ago)

is cutty short for cuthbert?

― Ronan (Ronan), Tuesday, 26 October 2004 09:09 (twenty-one years ago)

Maybe it's a Scottish thing but I find Calum's sexual politics fundamentally sound and am a little mystified by why some people attack them. In many cases responding to a woman as a sexual object is the correct response and in fact it would be a breach of etiquette not to.

― Momus (Momus), Tuesday, 26 October 2004 09:09 (twenty-one years ago)

well people are always attacking you as well (WINKY FACE)

― Freelance Hiveminder (blueski), Tuesday, 26 October 2004 09:11 (twenty-one years ago)

Yes, I've noticed. But you know, many attacks on mysogyny are actually attacks on women disguised as something progressive.

― Momus (Momus), Tuesday, 26 October 2004 09:12 (twenty-one years ago)

~~mysogyny~~ misogyny

― Momus (Momus), Tuesday, 26 October 2004 09:13 (twenty-one years ago)

true of attacks on racism also perhaps. but the 'characters' calum adopts on here still strike me as intentionally odious and 'offensive'.

― Freelance Hiveminder (blueski), Tuesday, 26 October 2004 09:14 (twenty-one years ago)

not to mention tedious, unfunny, unimaginative and dated.

― Freelance Hiveminder (blueski), Tuesday, 26 October 2004 09:15 (twenty-one years ago)

as opposed to 'dating'

― colette (a2lette), Tuesday, 26 October 2004 09:17 (twenty-one years ago)

better date than never

― Freelance Hiveminder (blueski), Tuesday, 26 October 2004 09:20 (twenty-one years ago)

he has a girlfriend you know!!!!!

― ken c (ken c), Tuesday, 26 October 2004 09:20 (twenty-one years ago)

look! she's not stopping me!!
http://www.bbc.co.uk/comedy/guide/images/400/imalanpartridge_3.jpg

― ken c (ken c), Tuesday, 26 October 2004 09:22 (twenty-one years ago)

HAW

― roxymuzak (roxymuzak), Tuesday, 26 October 2004 14:26 (twenty-one years ago)

eight years pass...

It's fine if you're honest about it.

― luna (luna.c), Monday, October 25, 2004 10:24 AM (8 years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

― before and after broscience (goole), Monday, 17 December 2012 21:28 (thirteen years ago)

― set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Monday, 17 December 2012 21:30 (thirteen years ago)

it's "fine" if you're "honest" about it

― set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Monday, 17 December 2012 21:30 (thirteen years ago)

hahaha

― she was giving it to two friends ...Aaay! (crüt), Monday, 17 December 2012 21:31 (thirteen years ago)

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