What do a man's preference for certain looks reveal his character?

When I were a lad, Lynsey de Paul bending swooningly over her piano (cute) and Suzi Quatro 69ing her Fender bass (glam hot) both turned me on in different ways. So I don't mind a bit of both. Not that I get a bit of anything these days.

I think what you can tell about type though is the less visual things.

Based on occupation alone, what are the chances that an Average ILX Boy will have more in common with a journalist (who probably has a brain, can probably write, hold a conversation, probably has some kind of taste or discernment enough about music to discuss it in reasonable depth) or with a model?

That kind of thing doesn't bother me at all.

But when boys are scared of women because they think they are "sexually aggressive" - that just makes me want to smack them about the head with a teddy bear.

There's a strong, but by no means perfect, correlation with blonde hair.

I suppose I'm thinking more "bookish" cute while you're probably thinking twee hairslides cute, which is perhaps even less intellectually threatening than the blonde amazon in the miniskirt is sexually threatening.

xpost!

We should drop this whole 'bookish' red herring, btw.

xpost, sorry about not having dropped the herring

I am increasingly tolerant of the idea that if I am ever to find another partner, it will have to be somebody older, but in the Marianne Faithfull sense of "older" as opposed to the Thora Hird sense.

x-post

Yes, I agree. Though not Juliet Stevenson.

1. Charlotte/Samantha tie or combine them into one person with Charlotte's head.
2. Carrie
3. Miranda

i'm drawn to eyes big time and face shape/features generally - 'feminine' style i suppose (but who can define that really?) - there's usually some eyes/smile combo i seem to look for and (unfortunately) gawp at if i catch it. what this says i'm not sure. pretty conventional me (liking glasses seems to have become conventional/pedestrian, or was it always?) but really like subtlety (intentional i.e. geekness or otherwise)

I can understand this point of view, it's not so much "getting one up on them", I just personally don't want to date people who like me cos of intellectual grappling or something like that, there's just no magic whatsoever in stupid intellectual power game flirting, and I hate when I feel people are trying to "get" me.

xx-p to Ro.

Sounds a bit paranoid and insecure...

Tom Cruise: YOU. COMPLETE. ME.
Renee Zellweger: Shut up and fuck me, you dipshit.

I guess that's what people look for in relationships to some extent. On an unrelated topic I don't think the men on this thread are too like "omg what if women laugh at me", are they?

Or yeah, what Ronan said, haha.

http://www.usatoday.com/life/gallery/upfront/scrubs.jpg

I suspect that people (human ones) can be needy (we all need things) and insecure (the world is dangerous). We must try to be sympathetic and tolerant about this, and try not to make the issue a gendered one, I think.

Hi, N.: it was nice of you to be interested enough in my views to say:

I think you should venture a longer answer. Forget the Sex & The City tangent. // When you say it means it has 'gone wrong', do you just mean it's no longer something you find appealling, or do you mean aggressive sexuality is intrinsically unhealthy or bad in some more fundamental way? If the latter, can you elaborate?

I think I mean the latter. Roxymuzak adds:

Maybe he thinks aggression denotes some kind of violent undercurrent or something?

- and she is right, really, I do. I am not sure how much I can elaborate. I think that sexuality should - if it takes place or expresses itself at all (and it usually does not) - be consenting, safe, interesting, and maybe even mixed up with tenderness and affection. Possibly this is too much to ask. We live in a hard world. But if sexuality becomes a matter of aggression and violence, then it is best abandoned. Perhaps, though, I am missing something, here. I am hardly an expert on this issue.

I don't like Sex and the City much. It always sought to elevate banality to profundity while leaving it as banality.

I think this is definitely true of Carrie's commentary, but I am never sure how much you are supposed to agree with Carrie, and how much to think she is a silly caricature. I don't know if you are supposed to take Carrie's (often ridiculous) musings as the "message" of the show. Which bits are supposed to be satirical and which aren't? The book the show is based on is more obviously satirical in places, as I remember, and it's not told through Carrie's voice. The book reminded me of American Psycho a bit.

Sorry, I don't mean to fuel further derailment.

i think theres also, perhaps, a disparagement of 'the obvious' or anything overt, which is unsurprising on a board such as this. people looking, consciously or otherwise, for something they think of as quirky, or that little bit different.

the answers are telling here, and unsurpising

i know the type of girl i am attracted to, physically, and i think it reveals a lot about my character. it is similar to many of the answers on this thread.

a tangential, and interesting spin off of this, is what it says about male looks...

...subonconsiusly, we think the indiewaif-euro-intellectual blah blah girl is more likely to be interested in us, because of our interests and personality, ie that we might be exciting to them in a ways other than looks. and that, perhaps, they are less likely to be physically oriented. an obviously hugely presumptive stance, but one i think it can be easy to fall into.

following from that, then, doesnt it lead to us thinking that it is interests/personality/charisma that is important (in the male), and not just looks (as many recent threads have complained about)?

ie, "i like quirkygirl because she will like me for my personality and be interested in me, and then maybe she will have sex with me"

there are many threads about being unable to attract girls because of failure of looks. there are fewer threads about being unable to attract girls because of failure of charisma/personality. but the latter is more telling, and more prevalent than people seem to want to admit.

OTM.

If anything, the opposite.

Orbit (not about SITC), Spencer and *@*.* otm. I like girls whose appearance is, and suggests a personality that is, in some way like mine (and perhaps in some useful ways complementary to mine). I dislike the indie girl - don't find Winona Ryder remotely attractive - because I'm not much into the indie thing or possessed of the indie aesthetic. I'm not sure my appearance is properly reflective of my personality, though. Perhaps this is a problem.

Oh come on. Womanly=curvy, manly=muscular. Deal with it.

I don't deal with anything I don't like.

i've heard lots of jewish guys say this. what's the reason?

perhaps it's a numbers/diaspora thing - if most people around you aren't Jewish, your aesthetic is going to be defined, perhaps, by a non-Jewish majority. Or perhaps it's a secular thing - the more religious you are, the more someone who shares your worldview and practice is going to appeal to you.

and on the SITC front...

1. Carrie (best on every level)
3. Miranda-Charlotte tossup - both relatively attractive (Charlotte is more attractive than Miranda, but Cynthia Nixon is more attractive than Kristen Davis) and moderately likeable but both somewhat annoying. Miranda's 'intelligence (which is more asssumed than displayed)/worldliness' (for lack of a better word) and Charlotte's warmth/'charm' (sort of) are mitigants. If I had to lean one way, it would probably be Miranda-ward. Dan otm about the 'instability' factor.
4. Samantha (zzzzz)

I don't like Sex and the City much. It always sought to elevate banality to profundity while leaving it as banality.

too true. but when the characters are allowed to be characters, it has some good performances and oh yes all that New York.

It's the before and after in Grease syndrome, innit? Sandy thinks she has to be all tarty and obvious to get Danny to notice her, but every bloke I know preferred the lemon-cardigan-swinging-ponytail-fresh-faced Sandy, and would run a mile at the leather-trousered slap-covered monstrosity she turns into at the end.