Ten Very Fundamental Ways You Are Different From Your Boyfriend / Girlfriend / Lover / Spouse

1) I do not truly appreciate food as being the highest art form on the planet.

2) I do not think that, at their core, all men are sexist.

3) I am not angry at God.

4) On a related note, I do not like Tori Amos. She does like like jazzy lounge music.

5) I hate clutter. She feels at home in clutter. (This is a constant battle.)

6) I do not accept Bono as the messiah. She feels this is a character flaw.

7) I love winter weather.

8) I am an alcoholic and a night owl. She is a morning person.

9) She's much more politically active and conscious than I am.

10) I am sociable. She doesn't like people as a general rule.

also the liking Tori Amos thing.

I would bring the differences between me and my boyf to the table but i do not have a boyfriend.

2) Drugs. I'm a drinker, she loves the pot. Dangerous combo. Mornings are rough on everybody. Alarm clock goes off - dog runs for cover.

3) Class. I come from a very working class, civil servant family. I've squatted and panhandled. Both my parents ride Harleys. She likes Broadway musicals and getting her shoes shined. She still says "Gosh" and "Darn" when she's not aware of herself, and eats with 'napkins'

4) Politics. J* is one telegram away from being Alger Hiss. Though she doesn't believe in affirmative action (any more) and has recently agreed to attend the firearms saftey class I signed her up for, she's still way too Rainbow Coalition to talk to sometimes.

5) Music. Along with the aformentioned affinity for Broadway musicals, she loves the shit out of Destroyer, Maqgnetic Fields, and all kinds of French music. I like all of this just fine, but she can't take Whitehouse, Vladislav Delay or Jandek. She strangely despises Belle and Sebastian, which really doesn't fit her profile. I suspect she's trying to throw me off.

6) Children. We both agree we want kids, but our parenting methods differ greatly. She plans to color Easter eggs with them, and teach them to tattletale if somebody hits you. I wish a Jesus-free life for my kids, who will promptly beat the shit out of anyone who bothers them. I also want them to go to private school, while J* the populist and self-described humanitarian wants them to Celebrate Diversity. Grim.

7) Family. Whle this has been covered a bit in #3, our families could not be more different, and, more importantly, our RELATIONSHIPS WITH our families could not be more different. My in-law hating dad gave me some sound advice when I was 13 - "Jimbo," he said, "when you get mnarried, and have a family of your own, GO and don't look back. I'll miss you but I'll understand." He usually gave me this speech every Xmas. My family has a "don't ask, don't tell" policy about pretty much everything, and that's why we get along so well. She talks to all of her 7 brothers and sisters at least twice a week, ending each call with a sickening "Love you" - even to the 17 year old boys. Am I the only one who thinks this is a little weird? They WRITE FUCKING LETTERS to one another.

8) Recreation. Her: PS2, TV, pot. Me: Records, books, bourbon.

9) Social skills. I'm a serious introvert who hates being 'obligated' to party just because some dumb fuck 'work friends' decide to throw a 'kegger.' I wind up sitting alone, embarrassed for everybody. I'd rather be home watching the Honeymooners or talking shit on ILM. J* is outgoing, friendly to EVERYONE, and is always down for a good, senseless bash.

10) Looks. Not to brag, but J* is drop dead gorgeous. She must love me for my brains, because I'm a sled accident away from Elephant Man status. 'Tis true.

2. I like couches and pillows

3. I do not like Destroyer

4. I don't really think about making money when I make art

5. I get embarrassed and ashamed of things

6. I don't really find pictures of fat retarded people funny or interesting; I'm not offended if someone else does, I just don't care

7. I am bad at sending things in the mail, and keeping in contact

8. I waste a lot of time

9. It turns me on the most to turn someone else way on

10. I am serverly interested in myself, to a fault

the hating of the pot or the obedience of the hot wife?

1. He holds no truck for most modern art, abstract in particular. I love it. It also suprises me, as he's an artist.
2. He can and loves to program/code crunch for hours on end. Ive no patience with five minutes of HTML.
3. Cucumber, and pork. I hate both, he loves both. I'm the cook though so he goes without piggy, heh heh.
4. I plan to quit smoking eventually if not soon. I suspect he has no intention of trying. This could be a bit of a problem.
5. I'm a taoist and like to think there is an impersonal force that moves the universe. He is a clinical, logical "science is all" type. We can debate our views without any hassle though.

... I seriously can't think of anything else. We dont differ much on music, movies, TV shows, food, our levels of tidiness (or lack thereof), political/social views, not wanting kids or marriage, its all good.

That's mean.

A morning person who's angry at God sounds totally cute to me. Good for you Kenan!

2) He's obsessed with cars. I don't even have a driver's license. I do like the aesthetics of vintage car advertising though.

3) When he feels things, he FEELS things. It can take him weeks to come out of a depressive slump. I'm way more resilient... I don't find my problems that interesting so I look for ways to distract myself. If I'm depressed in the afternoon, I've forgotten all about it by the evening.

4) He has a really strong work ethic. Mine isn't so strong. But we're both perfectionists.

5) I dunno, that's pretty much it.

Awwww :(

2. She has participated in assorted activities that I won't detail because I'm not sure the statutes of limitations have run out, but that I haven't.

3. She can't stand hip-hop, because "it all sounds so angry."

4. She takes twice as long to walk anywhere as I do, even though our height differential is a mere 7 1/2 inches.

5. 30 minutes after walking into a roomful of strangers, she'll be best friends with half of them. Me, not so much. I've gotten very accustomed to hearing, "Your wife is so great/ sweet/ wonderful/ hilarious/etc." I just always say, "I know."

6. She cries very, very easily. It alarmed me at first, until I realized that it was her stress-relief valve. Now when I can tell she's getting stressed, I almost hope for the deluge, because I know she'll be much calmer and more relaxed 5 minutes later.

7. She has a Southern accent.

8. She makes really good biscuits (this correlates with #7).

9. She's three years older than me.

10. She's the best person I know. Me, not so much.

1. He is a serial hobbyist and will take up one activity at a time going VERY deeply into each one. I juggle lots of activities at once and never become totally absorbed in any of them.

2. He doesn't want to become his parents. I am already becoming my mum and don't mind.

3. Relatedly: we see and talk to my parents a lot and easily, while the opposite is true with his.

4. He doesn't understand the point of debate or argument, because - apparently - if he has reached a viewpoint it's because he's worked it out logically and therefore could not be proved wrong. I find that discussion is fun and helps me to clarify my views even if I don't change them.

5. He likes chess and Go. I shrink from any form of strategic game.

6. He is a good DJ. I am not. He is a listener to tracks, I to albums. There's no music that one of us likes that the other hates, though.

7. He finds cooking relaxing. I like to cook, but become easily stressed by it.

8. He can't really get on with fiction. I don't read much non-fiction.

9. I prefer doing things with other people to doing them on my own. He doesn't.

10. I don't feel that I really exist unless I'm having experiences, remembering past ones, and communicating with people. He is more self-contained and of the moment.

2. He cannot cook anything. He can barely even make a cup of coffee properly. Thankfully cooking is a passion of mine, so we don't starve.

3. He is shy. I am gregarious.

4. He is quite lazy, and would stay in bed all day and never go to work if he had the chance. I am a whirlwind of activity.

5. He has one or two expensive outdoorsy hobbies, such as skiing and flying planes. I have several less expensive indoorsy hobbies such as needlework, reading and listening to music.

6. He has a vile temper sometimes. I can't even remember the last time I raised my voice.

7. When he eventually gets around to undertaking any DIY jobs, he is a complete perfectionist who will measure, check, re-measure, use the proper tools, and take his time to do things properly. I am haphazard and slapdash, and put shelves up at funny angles.

2. She knows what happens in car engines

3. She is itinerant

4. She disapproves of stockpiling food

5. She is quite happy with only 1 glass of wine of an evening

6. She has an inexplicable lack of desperate passion for AFC Wimbledon

7. She takes ages in the shower

8. She loves dogs

9. She doesn't spout platitudes and vague self-help bollocks when things are tough

10. She's beautiful

There are people I know who find that sexy, sir. (And clearly you're married to one of them.)

3. She never sprays cum into my socks.

Heh. I was wondering if I would run into anyone. It was my pre-party stop for the day (got two recent Fall reissues, rah!).

Performing bukkake onto/into socks and then throwing them at or hitting the body of your intended with them.

(on the other hand, if any of your players play a blinder you'll probably discover they'll have left on the AFCW team coach...)

2) She has an ovary, whereas I do not.

3) She can sing, although she cannot play the drums. I am the exact opposite.

4) She doesn't like jazz or (much) hip-hop.

5) Clutter annoys her much more quickly than it does me (I'm developing my clutter sensitivity though).

6) I like hot sauce on eggs.

That's all I've got.

YUM! post yr recipe?

I may post the recipe from my stepmom (whose hamantaschen shames ours), but honestly I've also had pretty good luck with the recipe on the back of the Solo poppy-seed filling labels.

AN ovary? Dare I ask what happened to the other one? :/

She misplaced it. Then she found it, but got ovarian cancer.