Things You (Blue Staters) Like To Tell Red Staters About Yourself

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For example:

I drink regular coffee, not lattes, and though I have had sex before marriage, I am in a long-term, monogamous, loving relationship, not some liberal orgy of sin, and I do not do drugs, and I drive a ten year old car, and although I am a musician and my girlfriend is an artist, we both also have regular jobs, and I actually find the south quite pleasant, and I have nothing against christianity, in fact I am often moved by christian themes (The Apostle, the sermon at the dock in On The Waterfront, gospel music, etc.), and I don't think New York City is the be-all end-all and I probably buy the same crap as you guys at the same stores (Target, Wal-Mart, Home Depot etc.).

― Hurting (Hurting), Tuesday, 9 November 2004 04:34 (twenty years ago)

Pray tell, has anyone got a utensil big enough for this giant can of worms???

― adam... (nordicskilla), Tuesday, 9 November 2004 04:36 (twenty years ago)

Bryan has a really big spoon.

― Orbit (Orbit), Tuesday, 9 November 2004 04:36 (twenty years ago)

I mix races

― Spinning Down Alone You Spin Alive (ex machina), Tuesday, 9 November 2004 04:37 (twenty years ago)

That should have read Things you (Blue Staters) WOULD like to tell red staters about yourself.

― Hurting (Hurting), Tuesday, 9 November 2004 04:39 (twenty years ago)

i would like to tell red staters you are all gay!

― caitlin oh no (caitxa1), Tuesday, 9 November 2004 04:41 (twenty years ago)

I use a variety of lotions to keep my skin nice!

― adam... (nordicskilla), Tuesday, 9 November 2004 04:42 (twenty years ago)

Are we not fed with the same food, hurt with the same weapons, subject to the same diseases, healed by the same means, warmed and cooled by the same winter and summer, as a Christian is? If you prick us, do we not bleed? if you tickle us, do we not laugh?

― Kevin Gilchrist (Mr Fusion), Tuesday, 9 November 2004 04:43 (twenty years ago)

none of those cracker ass crackaz have read Shakeƒpeare!

― Spinning Down Alone You Spin Alive (ex machina), Tuesday, 9 November 2004 04:46 (twenty years ago)

Then they'll think I've very eloquent.

― Kevin Gilchrist (Mr Fusion), Tuesday, 9 November 2004 04:48 (twenty years ago)

You've very eloquent indeed.

― Hurting (Hurting), Tuesday, 9 November 2004 04:49 (twenty years ago)

I'm hope they test it by tickling me, not by pricking me.

― Kevin Gilchrist (Mr Fusion), Tuesday, 9 November 2004 04:49 (twenty years ago)

ticking the prickle

― kingfish (Kingfish), Tuesday, 9 November 2004 04:50 (twenty years ago)

if you ask me where rector street is, i will give you instructions that will lead you into the middle of the south bronx.

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Tuesday, 9 November 2004 04:51 (twenty years ago)

If you see the Jew coming, you must grab him by his horns.

― Hurting (Hurting), Tuesday, 9 November 2004 04:51 (twenty years ago)

je ne parle pas "southern."

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Tuesday, 9 November 2004 05:01 (twenty years ago)

Dear half of an imaginary binary opposition that has been discussed to death and beyond: I promise to personally shoot the next person who starts one of these threads in the head. Or wish I could anyway.

love,another imaginary person

― mouse (mouse), Tuesday, 9 November 2004 05:14 (twenty years ago)

My gay brother, who is at Yale divinity school and school for sacred music, gives props to my brother in Hoover, Alabama, who defends women and gays down there on his turf....
Douglas graduated from Sewanee and has never left the south. Alan graduated from Yale and has never left the east.
They respect and defend each other. I love and respect both of them.

― aimurchie, Tuesday, 9 November 2004 05:16 (twenty years ago)

Where I come from, Red = Commie

― rich1million, Tuesday, 9 November 2004 05:22 (twenty years ago)

I keep reading it as 'Slaters', as in the Scottish word for these horrid little beasties:

http://www.chatburnwildlife.org.uk/photos/mini10_bigwoodlouse.jpg

And thinking of a red one chatting to a blue one is more fun that thinking about the political stuff at the moment.

― Kevin Gilchrist (Mr Fusion), Tuesday, 9 November 2004 05:24 (twenty years ago)

my gay friend can pump more iron than and kick the ass of yer straight brother.

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Tuesday, 9 November 2004 05:26 (twenty years ago)

"my gay friend can pump more iron than and kick the ass of yer straight brot"

On what level do you want to encounter my wrath? Your friend and you should probably enjoy your mutual masturbation for as long as it lasts- before a "real girl" comes along.

― aimurchie, Tuesday, 9 November 2004 05:41 (twenty years ago)

before a "real girl" comes along.

actually, that's when we introduce you to bonafide, mullet-sportin' west village Diesel Dyke.

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Tuesday, 9 November 2004 05:44 (twenty years ago)

OOoh. I'm scared! it's the west village part that really scares me! It's like, i dunno, the Fallujah of dyke threats!
Grow up.

― aimurchie, Tuesday, 9 November 2004 05:53 (twenty years ago)

did I miss something here?

― From a Land of Grass Without Mirrors (AaronHz), Tuesday, 9 November 2004 05:58 (twenty years ago)

I can't tell if you two are playing or not. Either way, I'm tired, and I'm going to try to sleep now.

― Kevin Gilchrist (Mr Fusion), Tuesday, 9 November 2004 05:58 (twenty years ago)

Ever suck a cock? It's great!

― Arthur (Arthur), Tuesday, 9 November 2004 06:19 (twenty years ago)

You don't get to own a boat.

― Camtron (Cameron), Tuesday, 9 November 2004 08:40 (twenty years ago)

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