Assimilate or starve: eat at Applebee's

Actually, that's all for now.

End-result: GOPers will plop their clogs faster than Democrats will.

Last time I was dragged to Chili's, my dad ordered the fajitas. They came out on their special plate, but I noticed something was missing. Dad started in, and I asked him if his food was hot enough. He grunted affirmatively. I then pointed out that the plate had been making that annoying sizzle that usually comes with fajitas, it being one of the loud foods and all.

We asked the waiter who sheepishly told us that they usually squirt a little sumpin-sumpin' on the plate to activate the noise and had forgotten to do so with my dad's plate. THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT'S WRONG WITH CHILI'S, APPLEBEE'S, ET. AL.

However, just the fact that every single one of these places is packed every Friday and Saturday night shows that I'm in the minority. After all, the most profitable single restaurant in my state is a Red Lobster out by the mall in North Little Rock.

When tourists come to an intimidating place like Times Square, they're comforted when they see something they recognize from their hometowns. The thing I hear most often from out-of-town guests - people from Kansas City, Chicago, California - is: "We didn't know you were here. We've been in New York over a week, this is our last day, and we're so excited we've discovered the Olive Garden." They say their experiences in other New York restaurants have not been friendly. When I'm doing the hiring process, I look for a lot of employees from out of town, so when the guests come in, they can relate. I don't feel that Times Square has changed much since I was a kid. It's always been bright and exciting, and it still packs the same energy. Corporations have made America strong; I don't see anything wrong with corporations coming into Times Square. The Olive Garden is just part of the neighborhood.

You can come visit me and find out what it's like.

x-post

(as I was writing this a page I had in the background gave me an Applebee's pop-up. It was fucking creepy.)

Jesus is this OTFUCKINGM.

I also don't object to the pandering aspect of the suggestion. What I find obnoxious is how Applebee's is treated a synecdoche for everything the Democrats don't understand. I bet the very same people they're trying to court would find this tactic condescending and trivializing that everything they stand for can, in a short-hand way, be embodied by a restaurant. (So maybe I am put off by the pandering.)

"We're going to eat at your Applebee's to understand your kind better."

"Uh, that's great...how about going to our churches instead?"

yes, i have seen the commercial, spencer. it really isn't pleasurable, though. friday's totally owns applebees. as does max and ermas.

I have a friend who, whenever she visits her Mom and sister in Michigan, goes to Applebees. The brand reminds her of meals with them. I guess I have a similar thing with Chili's and my parents. I just think it's harsh to condemn these restaurants. I understand how they might be considered part of "the problem" (not gourmet, chain, destroying mom n' pop), but at the same time, I think it's a mistake to criticize them in the way that many cosmopolitan types do - people often have a deep psychic investment in these (problem) brands and places which should not be ignored (or criticized too harshly).

1) Denny's
2) IHOP
3) Sizzler
4) Shoney's
5) Chili's

Wendy's is hands-down the best national fast food chain in America. They had a London one and I really miss it.

You wacky urbanites, going to Red Lobster and Olive Garden as "a joke". I know of many suburbanites who would be very confused by this "joke". A joke? What's so funny about eating at Carrino's? It's good food at a decent price! That's funny?

I'm also enjoying this thread b/w the Steak & Shake thread. Fuck national chains unless they're serving chili fries!

On the rare occasion that I go to a coffe shop now, it's Caribou.

And maybe it was just an urban legend, but isn't Caribou owned by Saudis who gave money to Hamas? I'll stick with Domino's and Chik-Fil-A.

Actually, I go to Paul's up the street. I don't go to the national chains partly because of politics, but mostly because they're a great big fucking hassle to get in and out of. I assume that the waitress at Browning's is making enough money since she's been there since the Johnson administration. Guilt-free cheese dip, my friends.

yeah it was funny for a minute. "ha!ha! look at us! we're normal americans eating normal food with other normal americans!" but then soon realized that just for $20 more we could have each had the tasting menu at Le Bernadin. stupid stupid stupid

I once got in trouble at school for wearing a Fudpucker's shirt.

You Ain't Been Pucked 'Til You Been FUDPUCKED!

Being trapped in a foul exurb every other weekend as a teenager probably has coloured my impressions of those places slightly, but like Aimurchie I have seen the staff manuals written by chain-restaurant overlords. I worked for a day at Perkins once - my mom went apeshit when she saw that they ruled that you had to turn up to work actually wearing the uniform. "Wait, they're trying to dictate your appearance at times they're not even paying you to wear that thing? No sale!"

also, xxxpost, the ground round is absolutely foul. it's like fucking friendly's with drinks.

Pwned by IHOP.

Evolve or die:

Ms. Stewart acknowledges that Applebee’s has not aged well, and that it has become indistinguishable from the other “apostrophe-s” restaurants like Chili’s or T.G.I. Friday’s.

Above all, she and industry analysts agree, the menu has grown stagnant. Ms. Stewart is trying to steer Applebee’s into more adventurous waters.

It would be hard to imagine a more challenging time to do that. Food and fuel costs are up while the amount of money customers are willing to spend is down.

In recent months, Bennigan’s and its sister restaurant, Steak & Ale, filed for bankruptcy. Almost half of the people who own chain restaurants think things are going to get worse in next six months, according to a recent survey by the National Restaurant Association.

“It’s been a disaster,” said Sharon Zackfia, a restaurant analyst with William Blair & Company, an investment firm. “There’s been nowhere to hide.”

But Ms. Stewart loves a challenge, and she believes that small but important menu changes that will be introduced in the coming months will lead her to victory.

That sassy-talking apple RIP

small but important menu changes

Haven't they been making these every month since like 2005?

I'll be impressed only if Applebee's makes themselves worse than Shari's

Serious question: in what way was Applebee's formerly distinguishable from Chili's and TGI Friday's? And are the latter two distinguishable from each other? I mean, all are easily distinguishable from Denny's, which is more IHOPPy, and from Bennigan's, which is the same kind of restaurant but has much worse food. OK, I guess Chili's is a little more Southwestern. But seriously, explain to me what the difference between the ideal Applebee's and the ideal TGI Friday's is -- I've eaten plenty at both and have no idea. For bonus points, is the ideal Ruby Tuesday supposed to be a different thing again?

Oh, I had Ruby Tuesday's on vacation and it was really good, normal (no gimmicks) restaurant atmosphere and snooty foodstyles like you urbanites eat! Texas Roadhouse is really good too, they are vegetarian friendly and have a non-obnoxious atmosphere! Chili's has the least menu options and a more fast food atmosphere. Applebee's isn't bad but the plates are enormous.

I judge them by healthy options, like how many vegetables or salads you can get. Some might have a lot of calories but you are getting more vitamins at least.

OK. This thread belongs in the First Reply Hall of Fame.

Chili's bottomless chips rules all other family restaurant-style places imho.

i nearly got arrested at an applebees when i was 11.
― latebloomer (latebloomer), Monday, November 15, 2004 2:46 PM (6 years ago)

This never got explained! lb, what is the story?

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/business/wp/2017/08/11/applebees-is-done-trying-to-win-over-millennials/?utm_term=.ff0e7b2c07b8&tid=sm_tw

Now the company is taking items off the menu, including a turkey sandwich with sriracha chile lime sauce and a pork-ham-bacon sandwich. And it is bringing back old favorites, Lenow said, though he declined to say what those were. (“We wouldn’t want to tip off our competitors,” he said.)

Applebee’s is also assessing “whether the brand truly gets credit for hand-cutting steaks in the restaurant and whether we should continue with this approach,” Cywinski said.

Applebee's riblets are good

does the bar serve single malt scotch

Imagine the inherent corniness of Applebee's is gonna be significantly more attractive to the millennial market than embarrassing attempts at hipping it up.

a turkey sandwich with sriracha chile lime sauce

i think the turkey might have been the problem here, not the millenial sriracha

Applebee's should have called it "millennial sriracha" imo

why aren't the kids purchasing this turkey sandwich? what, you're telling me they don't like turkey now? you know what, i have had it up to HERE with these millennials

i actually ate at an applebee's a couple weeks ago for the first time in god knows how long. arrived at the knoxville airport, was driving into town and just wanted a square meal since i was going straight on to a party. it was okay, slightly better than i might have remembered actually but mannnn did they make it hard to stay with the plan of ordering something kind of not-gross and semi-healthy. everywhere you turn are seductive combo deals with big glossy pictures of the delicious-looking fried junk. or platters where you pick two sides from a list but only one item on the list is both a vegetable and appealing-sounding so you're back onto the loaded baked potatoes and beer-battered mac-n-cheese fries or whatever. the place did not look to me as if it had been renovated since the 1990s, though there were dumb bar trivia electronic gadgets at the tables so maybe that was part of the "millennial" maneuver. nothing else about the entire experience seemed as if it had been engineered to appeal to my elite east coast metrosexual ivory tower needs. and that's okay.