THE MYSTERIOUS AND OCCASIONALLY FUNNY SAGA OF REESEWITHERSPOON AT HOTMAIL DOT COM

There's this one girl who i have been corresponding with as 'Lindsey Lohan'. I told her to stay in school and not do drugs.

I'm Kristine from Norway. Sorry to bother you, just wondering if you're the actress Reese Witherspoon?
I am a webdesigner, and I'm wondering if you would be interested in having an official site?
I have sites for other actors as well. I can show you some of my sites if you're interested.

Thank you for your time.

-Kristine

Hi,

My name is Kristine, and I'm a 20 year old girl from Norway.
Sorry to bother you, just wondering if you are the actress Reese Witherspoon?
I am working a lot with webdesign, and I'm wondering if you would be interested in having an official website?

Here is a link to my own site, and from there you can see other sites I've made:

****

Thank you for your time.
-Kristine

You should have added "have some breast implants, they are so fetch."

and you're my fact-checkin' cuz.

Lindsay was already taken :(

Where does this leave fact-checking cuz, then?

All MY fan mail comes straight to me. YAY ME.

WOW PATRICK BATEMAN WROTE YOU!

nnngxpost

hey crly.

clearly ned has no idea that i have been receiving his fan mail for years. and mailing out glossy "autographed" 8X10s.

You damned wench! I shall spirit away your baby in the night and replace it with a troll baby.

june 11
can i suck your pussy.i suck your ass.i suck your chest.i suck your lips.i suck your foots.you are my god.i pray to you.are you suck my penis.my penis long big.my penis discharge in your mouth.your pussy taste like mango.

june 18
can i suck your pussy.i suck your ass.i suck your chest.i suck your lips.i suck your foots.you are my god.i pray to you.are you suck my penis.my penis long big.my penis discharge in your mouth.your pussy taste like mango.

june 19
are you suck my penis.my penis is very long and big.my penis taste like a sweet mango.my penis fuck your tight pussy.my penis discharge in your mouth.you like my penis.you love my penis.you miss my penis.penis means lun.my penis is your god.you pray to my penis.my penis is very hot.please help my penis.my penis wants you.my penis fuck your ass.

june 21
are you suck my penis.my penis is very long and big.my penis taste like a sweet mango.my penis fuck your tight pussy.my penis discharge in your mouth.you like my penis.you love my penis.you miss my penis.penis means lun.my penis is your god.you pray to my penis.my penis is very hot.please help my penis.my penis wants you.my penis fuck your ass.

june 22
are you suck my penis.my penis is very long and big.my penis taste like a sweet mango.my penis fuck your tight pussy.my penis discharge in your mouth.you like my penis.you love my penis.you miss my penis.penis means lun.my penis is your god.you pray to my penis.my penis is very hot.please help my penis.my penis wants you.my penis fuck your ass.

june 24
can i suck your pussy.are you suck my penis.i suck your ass,chest,lips and foots.my penis is long and big.your pussy taste like a mango.my penis discharge in your mouth.my penis fuck your tight and hot pussy.please help my penis.i miss your pussy.

june 29
can i suck your pussy.i suck your ass.i suck your tits.i suck your lips.i suck your foots.you are my god.i pray to you.i fuck your tight pussy.your hot pussy taste like a mango.are you suck my penis.my penis long big.my penis discharge in your mouth.please help my penis.your pussy discharge in my mouth.i love your pink pussy.you miss my blue penis.

july 10
can i suck your pussy.i suck your ass.i suck your tits.i suck your lips.i suck your foots.you are my god.i pray to you.i fuck your tight pussy.your hot pussy taste like a mango.are you suck my penis.my penis long big.my penis discharge in your mouth.please help my penis.your pussy discharge in my mouth.i love your pink pussy.you miss my blue penis.

july 14 (bastille day!)
can i suck your pussy.i suck your ass.i suck your tits.i suck your lips.i suck your foots.you are my god.i pray to you.are you suck my penis.my penis is very long and big.my penis discharge in your pussy.my penis fuck your pussy.i love your pink pussy.you miss my brown penis.

july 28
can i suck your pussy.i suck your ass.i suck your tits.i suck your lips.i suck your foots.you are my god.i pray to you.i fuck your tight pussy.i fuck your ass.i fuck your tits.i fuck your mouth.are you suck my penis.my penis is very long and big.my penis discharge in your mouth.i love your pink pussy.you miss my brown penis.your sweet pussy taste like a mango.hi your hot pussy.penis means lun.

hi

i am shayan m***** from iran.i hope you are ok. i am studier in nuclear engineer and i have factury for produse scanties and corsage for women in iran. i asked for you sending me your picture or other sex women. in my email.beacuse you are very beautiful women. i`m waiting there for one day beacuse i can`t stay for 2 day and iam send u money if you are send me picture sex or nude of you or other women. goodbye

i hope you are answer my asked.

february 15
MY FRIENDS ARE WONDERING IF U R A GIRL? PLEASE EMAIL ME BACK AND TELL ME. THANK U!!

february 15
HOW OLD ARE U AND ARE U A MOTHER

february 20
um person u havnt emailed me bak yet? wats ur nam????r u a girl or boy???????????? toshay my friend !! just to tell u tat i live in austria!!me home toun!! do u now wat tis =??? 9876543210+f***?? wel g2g.by??

february 23
guess wat, i had the most worst day @ school. my best friend (lynne) had a ex boy friend that used to go to our school then he went to a different school. then today he came back. my best friend and i had the hots for him! his name is brandon righberg! i had friends that told him i liked him. then at recess my best friend asked my other best friend (danika) to go ask him out for lynne. since they used to be boy friend and girl friend, he said yes. next recess when i herd about it i started crying. then when our class was in the library a girl named janaye sanders walked up to me and started to yell at me because me and lynne started to fight. now since im home i called my friend lynne and told her im sorry and that she can have him. but i still think he is hot even though he is going out with my best friend! well i really want you to write back at
smallfry******@hotmail.com and email me as soon as you get this email okay! got 2 go! by!

Mandame fotos de reese Witherspoon

PLEASE

I HAVE A STALK,THE DOCTORS PUT MY TO MY LEG,BECAUSE IM BORN WITH RIGIDITY

You should write her back and tell her

My husband has a stalk. He wakes up every morning with rigidity. Are you a boy a girl Cornelia? Cause what you describe is totally normal for a boy.

The first single is gonna be called "I Have a Stalk."

I love "I HAVE A STALK" and "am studier in nuclear engineer and i have factury for produse scanties and corsage for women in iran."

WTF would someone be making "scanties and corsage" for women in IRAN. Assuming I'm understanding what a "scanties" is.

my penis is very hot.please help

xpost

A) Mark E Smith
B) Bill O'Reilly
C) Michael Gira
D) Peaches

"hi your hot pussy" is like the funniest greeting I've ever heard of.

-- Allyzay will never stop making pancakes (allyza...), July 27th, 2006.

I imagine your inbox is now filling with many unfortunate missives.

also, i think i may have just accidentally sent an email saying "your pussy taste like mango" to ally's mom.

ps - the account is dead ;_;

"jawab zaroor dena" is something like "make sure to reply"

I had a✧.gras✧✧✧@iserveje✧✧✧.c✧✧ once. Got no sex at all.

al dot grassby at iservejesus dot com

I HAVE A STALK.

oh heck, too funny

this is the only place i have these emails stored. thank god for ILX.

my penis taste like a sweet mango.

fyi

"other sex women"

i just wanna point out that what pete claims upthread is true -- he DID send my mom an e-mail that said "your pussy tastes like mango"

o_O

From: Pete Smith
Date: Aug 17, 2006 11:07 AM
Subject: Re: i am a banana
To: Zack
Cc: Tom, Ally, Manon, Justine, lydia k*****y

your pussy taste like mango

From: Zack
Date: Aug 17, 2006 11:10 AM
Subject: Re: i am a banana
To: Ally <ally✧✧✧@gm✧✧✧.c✧✧>

ok did pete just make that announcement to yr mom?

On 8/17/06, Pete wrote:
your pussy taste like mango

A+++

well is it true or not

Awesome. The question is did she actually read it, read it and recognize it as someone who she's met, or did she just delete it as a hilarious spam mail.

Mango. Hm. I kinda like mango to taste like mango and...

This is incredibly fucking funny.

she read it and then everyone proceeded to have a 200+ post gmail conversation, during which pete insisted on dropping out of because it was "too long"

Well done, Pete.

during which pete insisted on dropping out of because it was "too long"

look at lil grammar fiend over herre

best part is "to: zack"

yeah i agree with that

I just ate the worst mango I ever tasted. Next time I won't buy my produce from the guy in the next stall at a bus station men's room.

senator craig to thread.

i have to remember to get gmail addresses under up and coming celebrity/band/movie names for this purpose. Tayzon✧✧✧@gm✧✧✧.c✧✧ must be a freeforall.

http://img297.imageshack.us/img297/7393/imageuploadimagesu3.jpg

http://www.newyorker.com/talk/2008/07/28/080728ta_talk_bethea

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