MEN: Are you easily intimidated by strangers?

haha, these guys called me a faggot once and I got in their faces and they ran inside their frat house!

I think the only time I did this the guy repeatedly punched me in the face and his brother threatened to kill me. I was pretty drunk though so it was OK.

Normally people don't try and start actual fights, they just take the piss out of my appearance. I very rarely actually acknowledge anybody that shouts something at me in the street (half the time I don't notice til about 30 seconds afterwards anyway), but most of the people that do that are teenage kids, who are inexplicably far more unnerving than actual hard people.

Is it wrong to ask what you look like that should inspire such abuse?

'A gothic', according to this one guy last week.

I look like one of those Oakey-haired suit-wearing 80s dudes. Not one of the mopy ones though.

(I wasn't even wearing black!)

(ngh!)

Actually I had a black t-shirt on under my jacket, but it was a Neu! one.

Worst derail ever

Oakland: One of the best things about the rise of green bud in hip-hop culture is that all the tough guys are usually too baked to even heckle, must less fight. I usually just get glazed stares, and I'm fine with that.

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Usually the biggest blowbags are the ones who expect you to be so intimidated that you do nothing.

In one of the few fights in which I've been involved in my life, a guy, apparently because of the way I looked at him, got all in my personal space and kept calling me out. I just sort of let it go and was hoping to walk past him once I got an opening, but when he hammered me in the chest with a two-finger stab it really pissed me off so I hit the guy as hard as I could in the face.

Now, I'm not a huge guy nor am I all that strong, but I hit him hard enough to knock him down (as he was kind of off balance doing his weird "I'm right in your face no matter where you turn" dance). Thing is, my fighting back in any way at all was so unexpected to him that he had no idea how to react and just kinda laid on the ground until I walked away.

I'm under the impression that he had absolutely no Plan B for the situation. Like "what if this guy fights back?" had never even crossed his mind.

I'm not intimidated by anyone shorter than I am, and I'm 6'3", so that really cuts it down.

Berkeley: Everyday I hack my way home with a scimitar through armies of hateful art car drivers!

Why be normal? How Berkeley can you be?

Not very Berkeley.

i finally figured out how to deal with teenage boys in the street.

i get abuse from time to time, most recently this kid sarcasticly said:

"Ooooh he looks cool, mate do you skate?"

to which i replied

"Yeah...ON YOUR MUM"

he was so shocked he just kind of walked away.

hahaha

also, don't underestimate the power of the words "dead babies" when shouted at maximum volume.

people get pretty freaked out.

i once got hit in the face for saying this huge guy smelled like poo. Don't ever try that.

I'm a total wimp but ... fuck strangers, I don't have time to be scared of them.

I just ignore them. I figure they want attention, and there's nothing more annoying than trying to get someone to react and getting nothing back.

I ignore it unless it seems like bullying behaviour, when I start thinking that they are likely to do this to people it would bother and scare. I was talking about this in the pub last night, and I was saying that since I've moved here to Tottenham, there have been half a dozen occasions when two or three young men (always say 16 or 17 up to I guess mid-20s) have taken a confrontational approach, always on the street I live on - it's always the same: I'll change my direction on the pavement to avoid them, as I do with anyone, and one or more will follow my line; I move again, and so does he. I just give whoever it is a half-smiling half-glaring 'fuck you, come and try it' look (well, with the youngest trio, who were all smaller than me, I just looked amused) and walk right at him. So far, in every case, I've seen their jaw drop slightly, and they get out of my way. In all but that one case, both/all have been bigger than me (I'm only 5'7) and something like half my age. I'm much, much tougher than you expect for a short 45 year old, but realistically I know I wouldn't have much chance against three six-footers half my age, and I guess one of these days this will get me in serious trouble. I think just seeing someone who looks confident and won't back down will make most people think twice, and maybe the shock value of a little middle-aged white guy in a suit taking that attitude to three large young black guys (the last occasion this happened) in a predominantly black area counts for a fair bit too.