My fear of social awkwardness has landed me in a spot of bother.

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This girl who i know likes me has been texting me all day because shes on some 24 hour coach journey. And she suggested going to the beach tommorow just me and her so i said that its too cold but maybe some other time.

So she texted back saying maybe we could just drive around and i said yeah maybe.

And now shes texted and said 'Call me on XXXXXX and we can chat! im home now if you want to go for that drive'.

GODDAMIT.

what do i do?

― Hari Ashurst (Toaster), Monday, 3 January 2005 17:09 (twenty-one years ago)

I find it near impossible to say no.

― Hari Ashurst (Toaster), Monday, 3 January 2005 17:09 (twenty-one years ago)

i hope she doesn't look me up in the phone book.

this is bad.

― Hari Ashurst (Toaster), Monday, 3 January 2005 17:13 (twenty-one years ago)

Tell her you broke your pancreas driving near the beach and the memory always makes you incontinent.

― Michael White (Hereward), Monday, 3 January 2005 17:14 (twenty-one years ago)

that is a shit hot plan.

should i also say that due to my incontinence i can't even drive anymore?

― Hari Ashurst (Toaster), Monday, 3 January 2005 17:15 (twenty-one years ago)

tell her that you're a wimp and you can't make up your mind

― Carl Winslow is WHAT!?!? (deangulberry), Monday, 3 January 2005 17:15 (twenty-one years ago)

go for it. play her some music.

― :| (....), Monday, 3 January 2005 17:16 (twenty-one years ago)

No, tell her that you can still drive but when you get near the beach she's in for some golden showers.

― Michael White (Hereward), Monday, 3 January 2005 17:17 (twenty-one years ago)

she is really nice and extremely pretty but theres this other girl.

oh dear.

― Hari Ashurst (Toaster), Monday, 3 January 2005 17:17 (twenty-one years ago)

CANT TALK .. TALKIN 2 INTERNET FRNDS

― Carl Winslow is WHAT!?!? (deangulberry), Monday, 3 January 2005 17:18 (twenty-one years ago)

WHAT?! Do you not like this girl? Go for it man, you never know what might happen!

― dog latin (dog latin), Monday, 3 January 2005 17:19 (twenty-one years ago)

maybe she'd like to hold my laptop while we cruise around looking for free wireless internet.

that sounds like an activity that platonic friends could enjoy together

― Hari Ashurst (Toaster), Monday, 3 January 2005 17:20 (twenty-one years ago)

she is really nice and extremely pretty but theres this other girl.

"Le mieux est l’ennemi du bien."

Don't be a fool, man! Take nice, pretty girls to the beach while you still can.

― Michael White (Hereward), Monday, 3 January 2005 17:20 (twenty-one years ago)

but theres the other girl that im kind of in the process of getting together with. But we're not together yet i suppose.

i could play the field.

i've been brought up to stay well away from the field though.

― Hari Ashurst (Toaster), Monday, 3 January 2005 17:20 (twenty-one years ago)

There is no substitute for knowing your own mind.

― Aimless (Aimless), Monday, 3 January 2005 17:23 (twenty-one years ago)

what about being the king of all minds?

and being able to control all the minds.

― Hari Ashurst (Toaster), Monday, 3 January 2005 17:25 (twenty-one years ago)

Aimless, if you don't know your own mind but are absolutely, perfectly conversant with your own genitals, it may not be a substitute, but it's pretty close.

― Michael White (Hereward), Monday, 3 January 2005 17:25 (twenty-one years ago)

wait, is this the hand holding girl or no? if not, don't go! you like the other girl. if so, what is the problem?

― Emilymv (Emilymv), Monday, 3 January 2005 17:36 (twenty-one years ago)

its not hand holding girl.

the problem is that this other girl now probably thinks i like her. I think i just won't text back.

― Hari Ashurst (Toaster), Monday, 3 January 2005 17:37 (twenty-one years ago)

hari, arent you stuck on the girl you held hands w/ the other night? tell coach journey girl that you have halitosis and you fear she'd find your breath offensive.

― jill schoelen is the queen of my dreams! (Homosexual II), Monday, 3 January 2005 17:38 (twenty-one years ago)

oh, whoops.

― jill schoelen is the queen of my dreams! (Homosexual II), Monday, 3 January 2005 17:40 (twenty-one years ago)

Dude. opprotunities for road head should not be passed up.

― Jimmy Mod always makes friends with women before bedding them down (ModJ), Monday, 3 January 2005 17:41 (twenty-one years ago)

I think i just won't text back.

This is the least gentlemanly thing you can do.

― Michael White (Hereward), Monday, 3 January 2005 17:41 (twenty-one years ago)

Hari, if you were king of all minds you would still have to come to ILX and ask us what to do next.

Michael, the mind-genital nexus is already quite cozy for most of us. I imagine Hari's genitals putting a figurative arm around Hari's mind and saying in its best Bogart-to-Bergman-in-Casablanca accents, "Don't you worry. I'll do the thinking for the both of us."

― Aimless (Aimless), Monday, 3 January 2005 17:44 (twenty-one years ago)

You should defintely respond to beach girl because you can use her as a bargaining chip in case hand holding girl can't make up her mind.

― MindInRewind (Barry Bruner), Monday, 3 January 2005 17:45 (twenty-one years ago)

ouch. i think that would actually hurt

(xpost)

― Hari Ashurst (Toaster), Monday, 3 January 2005 17:45 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.insecurities.org/junk/domestic.jpg

― Ganbare Goemon (ex machina), Monday, 3 January 2005 17:46 (twenty-one years ago)

Hari, the only real soultion here is some kind of duel. Mud wrestling, fencing, scrabble, archery, something along these lines. If it were me, I'd see who could give me the greatest number of orgasms in a six hour period, winner take all.

― Michael White (Hereward), Monday, 3 January 2005 17:49 (twenty-one years ago)

i like the cut of your jib, Micheal White.

― Hari Ashurst (Toaster), Monday, 3 January 2005 17:50 (twenty-one years ago)

Yes, strength and wits competitions are the best bargaining chip you could ever ask for. Survival of the fittest -- what a motivational tactic!

― MindInRewind (Barry Bruner), Monday, 3 January 2005 17:51 (twenty-one years ago)

ok settled, Anna (the hand holding girl) is coming over at 9.

thanks guys.

― Hari Ashurst (Toaster), Monday, 3 January 2005 17:52 (twenty-one years ago)

I figured as much, given how long you've spent courting hand holding girl. Good decision.

― MindInRewind (Barry Bruner), Monday, 3 January 2005 17:54 (twenty-one years ago)

(I wasn't brought up to play the field either. Hell, I don't even have the proper shoes for playing on that field even if I wanted to)

― MindInRewind (Barry Bruner), Monday, 3 January 2005 17:56 (twenty-one years ago)

Give her a kiss for me. Tell her some interweb pervert you don't really know has been giving you fantastic love-life advice. (That way you can kiss her without really kissing her, see?)

― Michael White (Hereward), Monday, 3 January 2005 17:56 (twenty-one years ago)

haha

ok i will.

i guess now isn't the time to bring up the blonde german girl who is coming to see me in my band next week.

― Hari Ashurst (Toaster), Monday, 3 January 2005 17:59 (twenty-one years ago)

Hari, do you have like, scores of girls fawning over you?

― jill schoelen is the queen of my dreams! (Homosexual II), Monday, 3 January 2005 18:04 (twenty-one years ago)

thats the thing.

i don't know how to reject advances of girls.

so i end up with crazy situations.

― Hari Ashurst (Toaster), Monday, 3 January 2005 18:05 (twenty-one years ago)

You do what they all do to me, not answer their phonecalls and never return them, either. Sooner or later, they will get the idea.

― jill schoelen is the queen of my dreams! (Homosexual II), Monday, 3 January 2005 18:06 (twenty-one years ago)

You need to become a Mormon or Muslim and make them all honest women.

― Michael White (Hereward), Monday, 3 January 2005 18:07 (twenty-one years ago)

maybe the go-for-a-drive-girl will show up unexpectedly while the hand-holding-girl is there, forcing you to hide in the closet or cause some other jack tripper-y hijinks.

― Emilymv (Emilymv), Monday, 3 January 2005 18:10 (twenty-one years ago)

Or porno-y hijinks.

― Thermo Thinwall (Thermo Thinwall), Monday, 3 January 2005 18:11 (twenty-one years ago)

Hey, you should not not text her back I think, that's a bit rude! Better to be honest now you have a perfect excuse: "Sorry not tonight, I have a date! But maybe some other time." Then she'll know at least!

― Hanna (Hanna), Monday, 3 January 2005 18:19 (twenty-one years ago)

hari if you hold this new girl's boobs its technically not cheating.

― mark p (Mark P), Monday, 3 January 2005 18:21 (twenty-one years ago)

I think it would be better to be honest outright instead of leading her on, or whatever.. this all reminds me of the time this dude in highschool whom I adored quite obviously kept letting me hang around him, and then one afternoon I invited myself over, we hung out for a while, then he revealed that I needed to leave so he could get ready for a date. Whut the Eff, man!

― jill schoelen is the queen of my dreams! (Homosexual II), Monday, 3 January 2005 18:23 (twenty-one years ago)

thats a perfectly rational idea actually.

i think i'll execute it.

xxpost

― Hari Ashurst (Toaster), Monday, 3 January 2005 18:24 (twenty-one years ago)

Aha! But if you're not with hand-holding girl yet then you can still see whatta gwaan with beach girl. And if hand-holding girl finds out it might work in your favour (ie she misses your attention and suddenly wants it back). It's a little conniving I know, but relationships are like the buses that way.

Who knows, you might find that you get on really well with beach girl and stuff. If not you can say "no thanks" next time and you won't have missed out.

― dog latin (dog latin), Monday, 3 January 2005 18:24 (twenty-one years ago)

DAEREST PERTTY GO-TEH-BEATCH GURL,

sORRY I CA'NT GO TO TEH BECH. MUST HOLED HANS WTIH OTHR PERRTY GURL. TXT YUO LATER.

lOVE,

hARRI

multiple x-post (or not as the fancy strikes you)

― Michael White (Hereward), Monday, 3 January 2005 18:26 (twenty-one years ago)

i have a feeling hand-holding girl would not suddenly miss your attention and want it back if she found you were seeing someone else. i think she would call it quits with you. she doesn't seem the type to be easily manipulated. i say this with the confidence of a complete stranger on the internet.

― Emilymv (Emilymv), Monday, 3 January 2005 18:32 (twenty-one years ago)

shes really quite shy and would be very hurt i think.

― Hari Ashurst (Toaster), Monday, 3 January 2005 18:36 (twenty-one years ago)

The busses thing is horribly true :/

I have been in this position twice this year and handled it once all gentlemanly-like and once by being an utter dickwad. Results were roughly equal.

― Gravel Puzzleworth (Gregory Henry), Monday, 3 January 2005 18:42 (twenty-one years ago)

You need to become a Mormon or Muslim and make them all honest women.

You need to become a Momus and make them all mug you instead of want your winky.

― Minnie, Monday, 3 January 2005 18:46 (twenty-one years ago)

Yeah but isn't that bus thing what keeps people from really being committed in the first place?

― jill schoelen is the queen of my dreams! (Homosexual II), Monday, 3 January 2005 18:48 (twenty-one years ago)

Revenge of the Nerds (2006) - . . . . . . . . . . . . . . NERDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

― Ganbare Goemon (ex machina), Monday, 3 January 2005 18:50 (twenty-one years ago)

MANDEE TELL ME ABOUT THIS RED DRAGON THING

― Gravel Puzzleworth (Gregory Henry), Monday, 3 January 2005 19:29 (twenty-one years ago)

HAHA UM GREG THIS ISNT THE APPROPRIATE VENUE FOR DISCUSSION.

― jill schoelen is the queen of my dreams! (Homosexual II), Monday, 3 January 2005 19:40 (twenty-one years ago)

i don't know how to reject advances of girls.

You say this like it's a bad thing. ;)

― Je4nne ƒury (Jeanne Fury), Monday, 3 January 2005 19:44 (twenty-one years ago)

greg, I just e-mailed you.

― jill schoelen is the queen of my dreams! (Homosexual II), Monday, 3 January 2005 19:48 (twenty-one years ago)

i'll bet you would easily figure out how to reject the advances of a total hippo with ass breath.

― Emilymv (Emilymv), Monday, 3 January 2005 20:15 (twenty-one years ago)

"i know a really good lake that you can rinse that in"

― Hari Ashurst (Toaster), Monday, 3 January 2005 20:22 (twenty-one years ago)

Stop boasting.

― You've Got to Pick Up Every Stitch (tracerhand), Monday, 3 January 2005 20:27 (twenty-one years ago)

i don't know how to reject advances of girls.

Don't bother trying. Your poor behavior and lack of interest will do this for you eventually. It's a perfect system!

― Carl Winslow is WHAT!?!? (deangulberry), Monday, 3 January 2005 20:30 (twenty-one years ago)

but i do know a really good lake

(xpost)

― Hari Ashurst (Toaster), Monday, 3 January 2005 20:31 (twenty-one years ago)

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