This is the thread where we discuss wonderful, life-affirming, heartlifting things about the United States today

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I mean, I might have to live there some day, and ILX makes it sound a few steps from armageddon sometimes.

― Markelby (Mark C), Friday, 11 February 2005 17:29 (twenty years ago)

Things stay open 24 hours.

― Orbit (Orbit), Friday, 11 February 2005 17:31 (twenty years ago)

baseball...red sox 86 years. /

― Big Baby Bingo (Chris V), Friday, 11 February 2005 17:31 (twenty years ago)

It's a great place to shop.

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Friday, 11 February 2005 17:32 (twenty years ago)

Malt liquor's only .99 a can.

― andy --, Friday, 11 February 2005 17:32 (twenty years ago)

I'm in it. (The rest follows.)

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 11 February 2005 17:33 (twenty years ago)

The trains run on time.

― Leon the Fatboy (Ex Leon), Friday, 11 February 2005 17:33 (twenty years ago)

free refills

― sgs (sgs), Friday, 11 February 2005 17:33 (twenty years ago)

Cheap(er) records (spot the ILMer)

― Ba-ba ra-ra cu-cu da-daismus (Dada), Friday, 11 February 2005 17:33 (twenty years ago)

Um, New York City?

― Hurting (Hurting), Friday, 11 February 2005 17:34 (twenty years ago)

http://www.wrestlingmuseum.com/images/models/hulkhogan.jpg

― Big Baby Bingo (Chris V), Friday, 11 February 2005 17:34 (twenty years ago)

Peanut butter cups available in every grocery and convenience store.

― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Friday, 11 February 2005 17:34 (twenty years ago)

Hulk Hogan doens't affirm my life.

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Friday, 11 February 2005 17:35 (twenty years ago)

... they're available over here too, so that's out (xpost)

― Ba-ba ra-ra cu-cu da-daismus (Dada), Friday, 11 February 2005 17:35 (twenty years ago)

beautiful VAST countryside

― Alienus Quam Reproba (blueski), Friday, 11 February 2005 17:36 (twenty years ago)

funnel cake

― Alienus Quam Reproba (blueski), Friday, 11 February 2005 17:36 (twenty years ago)

beautiful VAST asses

― Ba-ba ra-ra cu-cu da-daismus (Dada), Friday, 11 February 2005 17:36 (twenty years ago)

The trains run on time.

...actually they've been a bit sloppy in SoCal lately on that front = the left rules!

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 11 February 2005 17:37 (twenty years ago)

But he told you to eat your vegetables!

― Big Baby Bingo (Chris V), Friday, 11 February 2005 17:38 (twenty years ago)

About Jersey, and probably about the rest of the US, I can say great fucking highway system.

― Hurting (Hurting), Friday, 11 February 2005 17:38 (twenty years ago)

Fine. Peanut butter ice cream, cookie dough, candy, sandwiches, sculptures, and shaving cream.

You can even go to Joplin, Missouri, and visit the shrine of George Washington Carver, the patron saint of peanut butter.

― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Friday, 11 February 2005 17:39 (twenty years ago)

Peanut butter shaving cream?

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Friday, 11 February 2005 17:39 (twenty years ago)

ihttp://www.desert-survivors.org/images/indexpic.jpg

We have deserts and coyotes and tumbleweed and I think Europe is the only continent in the world that DOESN'T HAVE A DESERT.

― andy --, Friday, 11 February 2005 17:40 (twenty years ago)

COLLARD GREENS!

― Hurting (Hurting), Friday, 11 February 2005 17:40 (twenty years ago)

Billy Ray's Neighborhood Dive Bar in Portland, OR, and the Wrestling Church services that meet there every sunday night(earlier if there's a PPV on)

― Kingfish MuffMiner 2049er (Kingfish), Friday, 11 February 2005 17:42 (twenty years ago)

Fried okra shaving cream and sculptures.

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Friday, 11 February 2005 17:42 (twenty years ago)

http://www.inetours.com/Yosemite/pictures/Yosemite_Falls_Mdo.jpg

― Fish fingers all in a line (kenan), Friday, 11 February 2005 17:43 (twenty years ago)

I actually kinda meant examples of openness, generosity, selflessness, the milk of human kindness, that kind of thing. But hey.

― Markelby (Mark C), Friday, 11 February 2005 17:45 (twenty years ago)

http://www.briandunning.com/1000questions/images/ted-nugent.jpg

― Fish fingers all in a line (kenan), Friday, 11 February 2005 17:45 (twenty years ago)

philly cheesesteaks

― Big Baby Bingo (Chris V), Friday, 11 February 2005 17:45 (twenty years ago)

http://www.eh.net/graphics/encyclopedia/dustbowl/fig1.jpg

― andy --, Friday, 11 February 2005 17:47 (twenty years ago)

If you're ever out of shaving cream, peanut butter makes for a fine substitute. Just make sure you have a towel or hungry dog nearby.

― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Friday, 11 February 2005 17:47 (twenty years ago)

Gasoline costing $2.00 being considered "pricey".

― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Friday, 11 February 2005 17:47 (twenty years ago)

Snow ski on Monday; hike through the desert on Tuesday.

― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Friday, 11 February 2005 17:48 (twenty years ago)

I actually kinda meant examples of openness, generosity, selflessness, the milk of human kindness, that kind of thing.

No. Sorry. What are you, looking for welfare?

― Fish fingers all in a line (kenan), Friday, 11 February 2005 17:49 (twenty years ago)

elective surgery

― laurence kansas (lawrence kansas), Friday, 11 February 2005 17:50 (twenty years ago)

http://www.kgs.ukans.edu/Extension/highplains/jpegs/PL_highplains.jpeg

― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Friday, 11 February 2005 17:51 (twenty years ago)

gay marriage is illegal.

― dstepz, Friday, 11 February 2005 17:51 (twenty years ago)

You will never be able to see all the backwoods villages and townships...

― Jimmy Mod always makes friends with women before bedding them down (ModJ), Friday, 11 February 2005 17:51 (twenty years ago)

When I visited Raleigh with my girlfriend, complete strangers showed us around, took us out to bars, and invited us back to a party. Great people.

― Hurting (Hurting), Friday, 11 February 2005 17:51 (twenty years ago)

Most people in the Midwest are very nice and friendly, if not always terribly open.

Most people in the South are very open and friendly, if not always terribly nice.

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 11 February 2005 17:54 (twenty years ago)

A dude sold me bogus acid in Raleigh.

― andy --, Friday, 11 February 2005 17:55 (twenty years ago)

Tasty Freezes / Dairy Queens in every town
Lots of huge open space with nothing going on
Chili Dogs
Vanilla Egg Creams
Graceland
New Orleans
Lake Ponchatrain
Highway 61 through Mississippi

― 57 7th (calstars), Friday, 11 February 2005 17:57 (twenty years ago)

mixer taps

― laurence kansas (lawrence kansas), Friday, 11 February 2005 17:58 (twenty years ago)

Dan Perry pretty much OTM.

I find some of my favorite people are Southern city folks/college-towners though -- they're as educated as northeasterners but not as pretentious. They're friendly like southerners, but tend to be more liberal also.

― Hurting (Hurting), Friday, 11 February 2005 17:58 (twenty years ago)

Cacti
Death Valley, CA
Redwoods

― 57 7th (calstars), Friday, 11 February 2005 17:59 (twenty years ago)

I actually kinda meant examples of openness, generosity, selflessness, the milk of human kindness, that kind of thing.

Being called "hon" or "suge" by the waitress

Every American carrying jumper cables in their trunk, salivating at the chance to use them.

"Take a penny" cups on gas station counters.

Pedestrians who give verrrrrrrry detailed directions to lost travelers, be it in Possum Grape or New York City.

Orderly lines to the escalators in BART stations.

Everyone asks you how you are doing and then wishes you to have a nice day.

― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Friday, 11 February 2005 18:00 (twenty years ago)

I've never encounted more sincerity and niceness than when I was in the Carolinas. Never.

― Gravel Puzzleworth (Gregory Henry), Friday, 11 February 2005 18:01 (twenty years ago)

DANTE BICHETTE'S BAR AND GRILL!!!1

― jill schoelen is the queen of my dreams! (Homosexual II), Friday, 11 February 2005 18:01 (twenty years ago)

California Redwoods National Forest
huge diner-style breakfasts
Wild Turkey
Route 66 (goes thru my hometown!)
the ducks at the Peabody Hotel
the Corn Palace
Amoeba Records
ARTHUR
the Grand Canyon

― Shakey Mo Collier, Friday, 11 February 2005 18:02 (twenty years ago)

http://www.archives.gov/digital_classroom/lessons/nuclear_fallout_documents/images/shelter_photo.gif

BOMB SHELTERS!

― andy --, Friday, 11 February 2005 18:05 (twenty years ago)

two words: Hot Legs.

― Fish fingers all in a line (kenan), Friday, 11 February 2005 18:05 (twenty years ago)

what i like about america is that if you make eye contact with someone they will usually smile at you.

― jill schoelen is the queen of my dreams! (Homosexual II), Friday, 11 February 2005 18:06 (twenty years ago)

the Fat Possum crew in Oxford, Miss.
the Cacophony Society
Carhenge
the rose garden in Portland, OR
the buffalo in Golden Gate Park
American Indian heiroglyphics in Modoc
the "state" of Jefferson
BBQ

― Shakey Mo Collier, Friday, 11 February 2005 18:06 (twenty years ago)

Optimism.

― Gravel Puzzleworth (Gregory Henry), Friday, 11 February 2005 18:06 (twenty years ago)

Even in the supposed air of "moral issues" & the demonification of the homosexual, more American men are comfortable hugging each other now than ever before.

― known vaginatarian (nickalicious), Friday, 11 February 2005 18:11 (twenty years ago)

tell me more about how northeasterners are pretentious

(we say whatever we want, whenever we want, however we want)

― gabbneb (gabbneb), Friday, 11 February 2005 18:14 (twenty years ago)

It's big.

― jel -- (jel), Friday, 11 February 2005 18:15 (twenty years ago)

and fat.

― Shakey Mo Collier, Friday, 11 February 2005 18:16 (twenty years ago)

I actually kinda meant examples of openness, generosity, selflessness, the milk of human kindness, that kind of thing. But hey.

actually, this made me think of Cher going to visit troops in VA hospitals, then later calling anonymously into a CSPAN talk show to voice her distress over troop conditions

― Kingfish MuffMiner 2049er (Kingfish), Friday, 11 February 2005 18:17 (twenty years ago)

Despite the cliche, it's still a land of opportunity.

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Friday, 11 February 2005 18:18 (twenty years ago)

yay Cher!

if we're gonna start listing inspiring, uniquely American personalities this list is gonna get *real* long:

Mike Watt
Captain Beefheart
George Clinton
Sun Ra
etc

― Shakey Mo Collier, Friday, 11 February 2005 18:22 (twenty years ago)

tell me more about how northeasterners are pretentious

(we say whatever we want, whenever we want, however we want)

-- gabbneb (gabbne...)

― Hurting (Hurting), Friday, 11 February 2005 18:34 (twenty years ago)

Wait sorry, that didn't work.

Anyway, I meant to have an arrow pointing to myself with the tag "Pretentious Northeast Liberal"

― Hurting (Hurting), Friday, 11 February 2005 18:35 (twenty years ago)

http://content.clearchannel.com/Photos/male_celebrities/jerry_lewis/telethon_04_GI.jpg

― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Friday, 11 February 2005 18:40 (twenty years ago)

Wow, I have no idea what that is.

What upsets me a bit about this thread is that most of the posts take a tone that the US really IS some kind of vast wasteland, redeemed only by its kitsch. Is that the best we can do?

― Hurting (Hurting), Friday, 11 February 2005 18:43 (twenty years ago)

*tight smile*

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Friday, 11 February 2005 18:50 (twenty years ago)

I dunno, I tried to cite some seriously moving natural wonders and communities of people, as opposed to just kitsch. (but CMON the Corn Palace is awesome!!)

― Shakey Mo Collier, Friday, 11 February 2005 18:53 (twenty years ago)

we have the skinny extrahot no-foam gingerbread venti LATTE of human kindness!

― Aaron A., Friday, 11 February 2005 18:55 (twenty years ago)

Actually, for natural beauty, it might sound strange, but I fucking love the Garden State Parkway, especially in the Autumn, and especially the southern part.

― Hurting (Hurting), Friday, 11 February 2005 18:58 (twenty years ago)

the train going thru the snow-covered Rockies on New Year's Day
the Museum of Jurassic Technology in LA
the pirate store on Valencia St in SF (and its companion supervillain store in NY)
Kenneth Anger
Mudd Island and the Chattanooga Choo Choo

― Shakey Mo Collier, Friday, 11 February 2005 19:02 (twenty years ago)

In all seriousness Mark, were you really expecting ILE (aka The Center Of All Liberal American Jadedness Wrapped Up In An Ironic Bow Oh And 65% Of Us Want To Live In Another Country Anyway) to tell you positive things about America?

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 11 February 2005 19:10 (twenty years ago)

this Baja Fresh burrito that I'm eating is delish

― Kingfish MuffMiner 2049er (Kingfish), Friday, 11 February 2005 20:56 (twenty years ago)

The U.S. is an endlessly fascinating country with a diverse culture and beautiful sights and sounds.

And, I love Hershey's Cookies and Cream candy bars too.

― Ben Mott (Ben Mott), Friday, 11 February 2005 20:59 (twenty years ago)

Ooh, I love Baja Fresh. Where do you live Kingfish?

― Hurting (Hurting), Friday, 11 February 2005 21:05 (twenty years ago)

What upsets me a bit about this thread is that most of the posts take a tone that the US really IS some kind of vast wasteland, redeemed only by its kitsch. Is that the best we can do?

::crickets::

― Curious George Rides a Republican (Rock Hardy), Friday, 11 February 2005 21:06 (twenty years ago)

The area around Charlottesville, VA, is amazing. UVA is worth touring (especially the parts designed by Jefferson himself), the countryside is heartbreakingly beautiful, Monticello and the other historic sites are cool, wineries, etc.

― Hurting (Hurting), Friday, 11 February 2005 21:07 (twenty years ago)

I'm now in Portland, Oregon

― Kingfish MuffMiner 2049er (Kingfish), Friday, 11 February 2005 21:11 (twenty years ago)

I sometimes wonder if Mark forgets I'm american.

― sgs (sgs), Friday, 11 February 2005 21:12 (twenty years ago)

Portland? So this Baja Fresh chain is pretty big now, then. They have them all the way in Jersey.

― Hurting (Hurting), Friday, 11 February 2005 21:15 (twenty years ago)

Bet they have bookstores that you can walk around in. In fact, I know this to be true.

― Kevan (Kevan), Friday, 11 February 2005 21:18 (twenty years ago)

The U.S. is an endlessly fascinating country with a diverse culture and beautiful sights and sounds.

This is true. Also, we're all going to hell.

― Fish fingers all in a line (kenan), Friday, 11 February 2005 21:30 (twenty years ago)

well, it's far from perfect and probably getting worse, but i'd say it's still more wonderful/life-affirming/heartlifting than most other countries.

― mookieproof (mookieproof), Friday, 11 February 2005 21:43 (twenty years ago)

Yeah, well -- yeah. We don't have a big landmine problem. That's pretty nice.

― Fish fingers all in a line (kenan), Friday, 11 February 2005 21:45 (twenty years ago)

Heartlifting:

http://images.animationfactory.com/animations/science/anatomy_biology/heart_lifting_weights/heart_lifting_weights_lg_wm.gif

― Fish fingers all in a line (kenan), Friday, 11 February 2005 21:46 (twenty years ago)

I haven't killed anyone today!

― scott seward (scott seward), Friday, 11 February 2005 21:56 (twenty years ago)

Blowjobs are plentiful and widespread

― Kingfish MuffMiner 2049er (Kingfish), Friday, 11 February 2005 22:00 (twenty years ago)

Powell's in Portland may be the best bookstore in the world.

― Shakey Mo Collier, Friday, 11 February 2005 22:04 (twenty years ago)

Blowjobs are plentiful and widespread

And so are blowpops!

― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Friday, 11 February 2005 22:12 (twenty years ago)

Some of the best goddamn scenery and open spaces in the known world.

― ffirehorse, Friday, 11 February 2005 22:59 (twenty years ago)

Animal Planet's Puppy Bowl

― Kingfish MuffMiner 2049er (Kingfish), Friday, 11 February 2005 23:22 (twenty years ago)

KOTOR II just came out for PC, and those guys are also working on NWN2.

the Bioware guys(behind KOTOR 1) are working on an RPG set in a mythical feudal china, in which you can talk shit to others about their kungfu not being as strong

― Kingfish MuffMiner 2049er (Kingfish), Friday, 11 February 2005 23:28 (twenty years ago)

I am completely excited about Jade Empire!!!

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Saturday, 12 February 2005 14:53 (twenty years ago)

I would take living in the US (or at least California) over this shit hole anyday.

― C-Man (C-Man), Saturday, 12 February 2005 16:47 (twenty years ago)

Both monumental kitsch AND a seriously moving work of human inspiration and general American-osity: the Crazy Horse Memorial. Visiting it on a whim turned out to be one of the highlights of our honeymoon.

Also: roadside fruit stands where they sell handmade peach ice cream.

Also: all of Maui, especially the Hana Highway. Hawaii's a state.

Also: freedom of the press, which doesn't mean that every press outlet always says what you want it to say.

― Douglas (Douglas), Saturday, 12 February 2005 17:39 (twenty years ago)

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