I TOTALLY GAVE BIRTH!!!!!!!!!

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clementine was finally born on wednesday, february 16. needless to say, she is a perfect specimen, the most beautiful human ever. however, CHILDBIRTHIN' IS HELL! pure torture for hours and hours. i want to shout from the mountaintops about the awful truth of the matter. other women, even your own mother, will lie to you all through your pregnancy and reassure you that 'it isn't that bad.' or 'you won't even remember'. it is a vast conspiracy! i am going public with the truth. the bloody nerve shredding truth. EPIDURALS DON'T WORK! PITOCIN IS THE DEVIL'S POTION!

― Emilymv (Emilymv), Monday, 21 February 2005 15:27 (twenty years ago)

OMG congratulations Emily!

― Sean Carruthers (SeanC), Monday, 21 February 2005 15:29 (twenty years ago)

congratulations!!

― ken c (ken c), Monday, 21 February 2005 15:29 (twenty years ago)

Yay for Emily! Yay for Clementine! Yay for truth-telling! (Did your mom realize you were an unstoppable force?)

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 21 February 2005 15:30 (twenty years ago)

Yay!

― adam (adam), Monday, 21 February 2005 15:30 (twenty years ago)

Wow. Congratulations, Emily.

― Pashmina (Pashmina), Monday, 21 February 2005 15:31 (twenty years ago)

CONGRATULATIONS EMILY!

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Monday, 21 February 2005 15:32 (twenty years ago)

Wo0T for the shiny new baby person! B0o pain!

― lock robster (robster), Monday, 21 February 2005 15:32 (twenty years ago)

thanks guys! i will post photos asap.

― Emilymv (Emilymv), Monday, 21 February 2005 15:32 (twenty years ago)

congrats, girl i don't know! (seriously)

― djdee2005 (djdee2005), Monday, 21 February 2005 15:32 (twenty years ago)

\m/

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Monday, 21 February 2005 15:34 (twenty years ago)

Congratulations! A whole new person!

― beanz (beanz), Monday, 21 February 2005 15:35 (twenty years ago)

Well done, Emily, that's fantastic.

― Markelby (Mark C), Monday, 21 February 2005 15:36 (twenty years ago)

This is what comes of the evil of unbridled lust. Pain! Suffering! Torture! Pefect children! Congratulations - and my sympathy for the ordeal.

― Aimless (Aimless), Monday, 21 February 2005 15:36 (twenty years ago)

Emily, you and the baby looked great yesterday! You are my hero! Congrats again. :D

― sugarpants (sugarpants), Monday, 21 February 2005 15:37 (twenty years ago)

Yay for Emily and Clementine!!

― jaymc (jaymc), Monday, 21 February 2005 15:37 (twenty years ago)

Look out world, Here comes Clementine! (and her awesome mom, too!)

― jocelyn (Jocelyn), Monday, 21 February 2005 15:38 (twenty years ago)

Well done you!

Are you pronouncing her name Clementyne or Clementeen?

It's beautiful either way.

― Penelope_111 (Penelope_111), Monday, 21 February 2005 15:40 (twenty years ago)

KINGRATCHULASHINS CLEMILYEMENTINE!!!! OMG!!!

So are you guys home now then?

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Monday, 21 February 2005 15:42 (twenty years ago)

Brilliant!

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Monday, 21 February 2005 15:42 (twenty years ago)

Clementinemv is teh cute!

― Drake Beardo (cprek), Monday, 21 February 2005 15:43 (twenty years ago)

Yeh, fair play my dear. Congrats to you both.

I would imagine childbirth stings a bit.

― Johnney B, Monday, 21 February 2005 15:44 (twenty years ago)

we are pronouncing it with the 'tyne' ending. i actually had never heard the other until really recently. i like both too, but prefer that one, maybe because that is how i am used to hearing it.

yes nick! we are home. you should come visit when you get the chance! also, can someone give me a quick refresher on picture posting html?

― Emilymv (Emilymv), Monday, 21 February 2005 15:44 (twenty years ago)

c o n g r a t u l a t i o n s ! ! !

― caitlin (caitlin), Monday, 21 February 2005 15:45 (twenty years ago)

Congratulations! I am delighted for you. x

― Rumpy Pumpkin, Monday, 21 February 2005 15:48 (twenty years ago)

But you're kidding aintcha? It's not really that bad.... is it?

― Rumpy Pumpkin, Monday, 21 February 2005 15:49 (twenty years ago)

Way to go!

― Huk-L, Monday, 21 February 2005 15:50 (twenty years ago)

Emily, you just need to upload them to a picture hosting site (or your own site). Then put the URL with "i" before it in your post to make it show up in the thread.

If you don't have a place to upload pics, let me know and I can put them in my site's images directory. I'm sure Drake could do it, too.

― sugarpants (sugarpants), Monday, 21 February 2005 15:50 (twenty years ago)

Go Emily! Sorry it hurt so much! Sort've connected; I spent hours once trying to make my Mum admit my birth hurt hideously cos I thought she was being NICE and swallowing the male myth of um something, then I realised she was being truthful and was sick of me going on about it and hey it didn't that much and WOW things're diff for diff people, how unfair, that was a great revelation at the time. Wish yr child's birth had been merely VV uncomfortable. Glad yr so happy w/her. MORE CONGRATULATIONS! Being human's Ok!

― A Viking of Some Note (Andrew Thames), Monday, 21 February 2005 15:51 (twenty years ago)

75% of all conversation I've had w/ Emily post-birthing has been about the tremendous pain and the conspiracy claiming it's 'not that bad', if that's any indication.

― Drake Beardo (cprek), Monday, 21 February 2005 15:51 (twenty years ago)

Congratulations Emily!!! I'm so pretending I didn't read that part about the pain... otherwise I might never have sex again and that would be rubbish.

― Archel (Archel), Monday, 21 February 2005 15:55 (twenty years ago)

congratz!

― latebloomer: HE WHOM DUELS THE DRAFGON IN ENDLESS DANCE (latebloomer), Monday, 21 February 2005 15:57 (twenty years ago)

YAY EMILY AND LITTLE CLEMENTINE!!!!

― Je4nne ƒury (Jeanne Fury), Monday, 21 February 2005 16:04 (twenty years ago)

Many congratulations!!

The very first thought which came into my head the second my first daughter was born, was "My God, I'm still alive!". But you do forget - really you do. And it somehow doesn't seem half as bad second time around. I discovered entonox (the laughing gas + oxygen combo) second time around and I giggled through the whole thing. It was like I'd had half a dozen gin and tonics, and the experience was almost pleasant:)

I do remember a nurse coming around to visit me on the ward just hours after my daughter was born to ask what contraception I was planning on using. I winced with pain, and gave her a withering look.

Don't forget you've got the sudden bursting-into-tears-for-no-reason day to come yet. Probably some time this week. (Don't worry, it's quite normal)

― C J (C J), Monday, 21 February 2005 16:05 (twenty years ago)

WOOHOOO! Awesome birthing skillz.

Seeing new mothers suddenly weeping is a bit disconcerting, but you know, hormones. I didn't realise you had kids, CJ!

― Liz :x (Liz :x), Monday, 21 February 2005 16:08 (twenty years ago)

Yeah chicks crying for no reason, shocking

― A Viking of Some Note (Andrew Thames), Monday, 21 February 2005 16:14 (twenty years ago)

I JEST OBV I LOVE WOMEN WAY TOO MUCH

― A Viking of Some Note (Andrew Thames), Monday, 21 February 2005 16:15 (twenty years ago)

Isn't that called postpartem depression or something like that, CJ?

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Monday, 21 February 2005 16:16 (twenty years ago)

Congratulations!!

― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Monday, 21 February 2005 16:16 (twenty years ago)

Thought this was going to be a Brian thread!

Oh - congrats!

― Thermo Thinwall (Thermo Thinwall), Monday, 21 February 2005 16:19 (twenty years ago)

Palju, PALJU õnne mammale ja beebile! & kanget tervist!
(Exactly :)

― t\'\'t (t\'\'t), Monday, 21 February 2005 16:20 (twenty years ago)

No, the bursting-into-tears day isn't the same as post-natal (postpartum) depression. The post-natal thing is something which can go on a lot longer.

There just seems to be a day when all the hormones are trying to readjust themselves, and you can just cry for no reason. It doesn't last long.

(Yes Liz -I've got two daughters. I'm not Unruly in the slightest, I'm actually quite sensible in real life!)

― C J (C J), Monday, 21 February 2005 16:21 (twenty years ago)

Congratulations!

― RS £aRue (rockist_scientist), Monday, 21 February 2005 16:21 (twenty years ago)

CJ the Sensible!

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 21 February 2005 16:23 (twenty years ago)

Congratulations, Emily.

― The Obligatory Sourpuss (Begs2Differ), Monday, 21 February 2005 16:28 (twenty years ago)

Lovely news. I don't know how women do it.

― Sven Bastard (blueski), Monday, 21 February 2005 16:30 (twenty years ago)

Congratulations!

― Curious George Rides a Republican (Rock Hardy), Monday, 21 February 2005 16:39 (twenty years ago)

Congratulations and great choice of birthdays! (I'm 2/16 also. . .)

― Jeff Wright (JeffW1858), Monday, 21 February 2005 17:26 (twenty years ago)

Congratulations!

― youn, Monday, 21 February 2005 17:32 (twenty years ago)

CONGRATS! i knew everyone was lying about how easy childbirth was.

― maria tessa sciarrino (theoreticalgirl), Monday, 21 February 2005 17:59 (twenty years ago)

So what's the mommy/daddy count on ILX now?

― Jimmy Mod Has Returned With Spices And Silks (ModJ), Monday, 21 February 2005 18:00 (twenty years ago)

I'm the daddy.

― Markelby (Mark C), Monday, 21 February 2005 18:07 (twenty years ago)

ILX parents, off the top of my head: Wm. Crump, Obligatory Sourpuss, Alex in NYC, Chuck Eddy, Luna, Nickalicious, Scott Seward & Maria D., mark grout. Surely others?

― jaymc (jaymc), Monday, 21 February 2005 18:13 (twenty years ago)

Congrats! Not to rain on the pain parade or anything, but my wife and I had our beautiful baby girl (Sophie Rosalie) January 5th and apparently our epidural worked brilliantly, because my wife says she could barely feel it after the drugs kicked in. Before the epidural on the other hand -- woo boy!

― chris herrington (chris herrington), Monday, 21 February 2005 18:14 (twenty years ago)

o yeah! congrats chris, too!

― jaymc (jaymc), Monday, 21 February 2005 18:16 (twenty years ago)

Huge congratulations, Emily! Also sympathy for the pain, but at least the memory of pain doesn't hurt, and you did get a baby out of it, which is good. Most pains don't come with a reward.

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Monday, 21 February 2005 18:28 (twenty years ago)

Is it too early for the parental advice portion of the thread? Please slap me down if so:

Four things we did to raise a totally awesome daughter:
1. Turned off the tv between birth and age 5
2. No caffeine
3. Read to her every day
4. Spoke to her in English, not babytalk.

YMMV. Ignore as desired.

I know I already said this just a dozen posts ago, but congratulations to all three of yez!

And congrats, Chris H!

― Curious George Rides a Republican (Rock Hardy), Monday, 21 February 2005 19:11 (twenty years ago)

Awesome, Emily. Good work. No matter how painful, it's something you never, ever regret. Hugs to you and your baby.

― Fish fingers all in a line (kenan), Monday, 21 February 2005 19:15 (twenty years ago)

Hooray Emily!

― sgs (sgs), Monday, 21 February 2005 19:16 (twenty years ago)

Congratulations! Fantastic!

― MindInRewind (Barry Bruner), Monday, 21 February 2005 19:36 (twenty years ago)

Wonderful news Emily, happy joy yay!

― Trayce (trayce), Tuesday, 22 February 2005 02:28 (twenty years ago)

Awesome!

― sundar subramanian (sundar), Tuesday, 22 February 2005 02:30 (twenty years ago)

congrats!

― j blount (papa la bas), Tuesday, 22 February 2005 02:30 (twenty years ago)

congrats emily!!!

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Tuesday, 22 February 2005 02:33 (twenty years ago)

Congratulations, Emily! And welcome to the world, Clementine!

― scott seward (scott seward), Tuesday, 22 February 2005 03:09 (twenty years ago)

Clementine! What a gorgeous name.

― Autumn Almanac (Autumn Almanac), Tuesday, 22 February 2005 03:11 (twenty years ago)

Oh yeah, not only congratulations on the babying, but congratulations on the name -- in a time of Pilot Inspektor, Audio Science, and Apple, Clementine will shine.

― Tep (ktepi), Tuesday, 22 February 2005 03:21 (twenty years ago)

You should write a diary that details exactly how much pain you were in complete with every adjective you know and read it to Clementine on all of her birthdays in lieu of buying her presents.

(I have been drinking so take that as my strange way of saying congratulations and all the best.)

(Wow am I going to regret submitting this post.)

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 22 February 2005 03:25 (twenty years ago)

Ha ha. Congratulations! Keep on eye on that thing, though, you hear? You never know precisely when they're going to turn evil.

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Tuesday, 22 February 2005 03:52 (twenty years ago)

Yay Emily, way to go!! I'm sorry to hear about the god awful pain, but Clementine must go some way to make up for it!

― PinXorchiXoR (Pinkpanther), Tuesday, 22 February 2005 09:23 (twenty years ago)

congrats! and way to post within a week after the fact!

― Matos-Webster Dictionary (M Matos), Tuesday, 22 February 2005 09:24 (twenty years ago)

Four things we did to raise a totally awesome daughter:
1. Turned off the tv between birth and age 5
2. No caffeine
3. Read to her every day
4. Spoke to her in English, not babytalk.

3 and 4 yep. 1 no. 2 whaaaa?

― mark grout (mark grout), Tuesday, 22 February 2005 10:13 (twenty years ago)

"You can't give a baby caffeine..."

― mark grout (mark grout), Tuesday, 22 February 2005 10:13 (twenty years ago)

Dr C and Matt Haibun/Haikunym/Begs2Differ Cibula are also proud (I assume) parents.

Congrats once again Emily.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Tuesday, 22 February 2005 10:22 (twenty years ago)

Interweb mentalists be spawnin'.

― Liz :x (Liz :x), Tuesday, 22 February 2005 12:30 (twenty years ago)

Congratulations!

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Tuesday, 22 February 2005 12:41 (twenty years ago)

Well done, Emily!

Hello, Clementine!

― Andy K. (ADK), Tuesday, 22 February 2005 14:10 (twenty years ago)

Congratulations Emily!

― Ronan (Ronan), Tuesday, 22 February 2005 14:21 (twenty years ago)

Congrats!

Pain - oh yes. It's interesting that you say that the epidural doesn't work - Pam (gave birth to Ava, Feb 14) didn't even get to have an epidural so quickly did her labour progress after the first prostagladin dose. And Christ, it hurt. Entonox and the TENS machine was all she had. Swift but brutal.

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Tuesday, 22 February 2005 14:50 (twenty years ago)

Well done, Pam!

Hello, Ava!

Congratulations, Michael!

(Details of my wife's birthing/complication adventures documented in another thread... would rather not think about them ever again.)

― Andy K. (ADK), Tuesday, 22 February 2005 15:25 (twenty years ago)

congratulations, all around!!

xxxx

― RJG (RJG), Tuesday, 22 February 2005 15:29 (twenty years ago)

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