Counselling

I've been in therapy for about 13 years of my life. Two or three cousenlors were excellent the others, eh. When they've been good, they've helped me sort though my thoughts and helped me to see what I've always known was there but just was refusing to see.

Hopefully I'll be able to afford to go again soon.

The two who've helped me the most came to me thru word of mouth/referall from someone I respected. But 'asking around' is something you might not be comfortable with (nevermind that others might want to keep their own therapy on the DL)

Luckily I've found some great Civilian mentors. There are (free, anonymous) support groups out there for every imaginable problem, with people who are glad to help you, as they see this as a way to help themselves. In my experience, the best help you can find is in a person who has been where you are and made whatever progress out of that state that you want to make.

OTM.

revive...

any recommendations? how should I find a good counsellor? I've been coping with chronic illness for about 2 years but weirdly since I started thinking about getting counselling for the mental effects, depression etc, I feel a bit worse, like I've raised the white flag for myself or something.

also...when you go to counselling for a specific reason, do you bring your entire life in with you and put that under the microscope too, or how does it work?

It depends on the type of counseling you go to. Some are really interested in looking at your whole life to find the root causes of emotional problems. Obviously, if your problems are due to illness, that might not be very useful. Most counselors who are part of a practice (especially if that practice has a website) list their specific interests and methodology. My advice is to shop around until you find someone you like. I dunno how it works in Ireland, but here you can get a list of covered providers through your insurance.

Even here, it depends on what you want. I went to a really good counselling service in Rathfarnham a few years ago when my marriage broke up and I just needed someone to talk to who would help me marshall my thoughts and feelings around that one particular subject, so other subjects really only came up if they affected that.

And, as with all things of this nature, if you don't like the counsellor you're working with, you can always change.

talk to your doctor, ronan, and ask them to help organise some counselling. they should be able to sort it out. i recommend it, definitely...

I feel like I'd rather someone young, not sure why. I guess doctor is the best route.

young and good-looking?

no...I don't care how they look.

Are there "psychological centers" where you live? You could have a chat with them. They can recommend a good counselor and/or do sessions with you. (Here you have centers for people who lack the financial means. But of course if the problem is "liveable" you'll end up waiting a couple of months.)

I understand Aaron's point, although my feelings are a little different. I felt as though I was being silly for having panic attacks (and whatever I was/am having problems with). I felt a little spineless. But then I realized that this was not helping the situation at all. I can afford it, I am not happy = do some sessions.

But do it, Ronan, even if it's just one session. You'll have a lot more insight into your problems, I'm dead sure. Maybe check some sites or with your doctor as to what the best type of counseling might be.

And, remember, you decide what to bring into the room. If you don't feel like talking about something, just tell them.