I seem to have written a book

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Then again, it is always hard to know about these things.

What I can say with some certainty is that I have written in the near neighborhood of 75,000 words, spread out like a bad stain across 244 pages. There is a beginning, a middle and an end - a rather tame end to be sure, but an end nevertheless. It even has a title and a subtitle (to give the title some company). As some of you may recall, I started this in response to NaNoWriMo, last November 2004.

In addition, it will soon take on corporeal form (...and the words shall be made flesh, sorta, kinda). For, lo, I have formatted it as a 5x8 paperback, designed a lovely book cover and have directed CafePress.com to print out three (3) copies of it for me to love, honor and loan out to friends and family. I even intend to brandish it at job interviews, should the opportunity ever arise. It's a sweet looking object, if I do say so myself.

So, I am very happy about all this. My difficulty (and the major reason I am posting this) is this:

As it stands today, not a single soul besides myself has read this book. OTOH, I have pored over this ms several times with concentrated attention, editing out my most egregious typos and other various kinds of ugliness that slipped in during the frenzy of writing a first draft. This intense editing effort has a distorting effect, like holding a book two inches from one's nose.

I'd love to submit this thingmabob to a publisher, or a book agent, and see if any of them can detect a glimmer of commercial potential in it. But, before I take that step, I would like to test the waters by making the book (or some large portion of it) available to a select number of readers who are not so close to me as to make their opinions suspect for that reason.

I shall throw this question open to discussion now. What do you think I should do next?

― Aimless (Aimless), Wednesday, 2 March 2005 19:24 (twenty years ago)

Internet it.

― The Obligatory Sourpuss (Begs2Differ), Wednesday, 2 March 2005 19:27 (twenty years ago)

What Matt said.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 2 March 2005 19:28 (twenty years ago)

P! D! F!

― firstworldman (firstworldman), Wednesday, 2 March 2005 19:30 (twenty years ago)

PDF is easy enough, but once the cat is out of the bag on the Internet, wouldn't that pretty well detroy any commercial value? How could I retain sufficient control over it?

― Aimless (Aimless), Wednesday, 2 March 2005 19:32 (twenty years ago)

It is a novel, I take it?

― jaymc (jaymc), Wednesday, 2 March 2005 19:33 (twenty years ago)

Not a novel, but an entertaining narrative. Think Three Men in a Boat, Innocents Abroad, or Bill Bryson.

― Aimless (Aimless), Wednesday, 2 March 2005 19:34 (twenty years ago)

If I remove the graphics, the PDF comes in under 1MB. I suppose I could attach it and email it to volunteer readers.

I'm really not keen on the idea of broadcasting it for free, unless there seems to be no chance of more traditional publishing. Once it appears that avenue is closed to me, then (of course) it is much better to have it read than to let it shrivel and die alone in the dark.

― Aimless (Aimless), Wednesday, 2 March 2005 19:43 (twenty years ago)

xpost:
Sounds good to me, Aimless. I don't know how these things work, but if you try to set up a site with a password, be careful. Jaymc is liable to crack it, as he did at the Voice site before the Pazz and Jop poll was officially out.

― Ken L (Ken L), Wednesday, 2 March 2005 19:44 (twenty years ago)

I'll at least give it a chance, aimless. Send away if you wish.

― 57 7th (calstars), Wednesday, 2 March 2005 19:45 (twenty years ago)

As I am trudging away at my Proust, I might like a distraction, Aimless.

― Michael White (Hereward), Wednesday, 2 March 2005 19:46 (twenty years ago)

yeah, I'd read it and offer feedback, Aimless, if yr interested

― The Obligatory Sourpuss (Begs2Differ), Wednesday, 2 March 2005 19:47 (twenty years ago)

yeah Aimless don't just broadcast it for free, hand it out to a couple people willing to read it and give you pointers but that's it otherwise it will get teh stolen.

― Allyzay Dallas Multi-Pass (allyzay), Wednesday, 2 March 2005 19:48 (twenty years ago)

I love this thread title, BTW. It's like, "Whoops! I wrote a book. How'd that happen?"

― Fish fingers all in a line (kenan), Wednesday, 2 March 2005 19:48 (twenty years ago)

I love this thread title, BTW. It's like, "Whoops! I wrote a book. How'd that happen?"

Heh. I thought the same thing.

"... hmm. And all this time I thought I was cooking an omelet."

― sugarpants (sugarpants), Wednesday, 2 March 2005 20:02 (twenty years ago)

Jaymc is liable to crack it, as he did at the Voice site before the Pazz and Jop poll was officially out.

*whistles idly*

― jaymc (jaymc), Wednesday, 2 March 2005 20:12 (twenty years ago)

have you got it copyrighted? or, perhaps you could make a poor man's patent and/or a pdf with a watermark?

i'd give it a go, if you like.

― firstworldman (firstworldman), Wednesday, 2 March 2005 20:14 (twenty years ago)

Print a copy. Seal manuscript in envelope and mail to yourself. Poor man's copyright. Works in court of law.

― Michael White (Hereward), Wednesday, 2 March 2005 20:16 (twenty years ago)

At first I thought this was going to be the companion thread to "I've sold my book" and was thinking "boy, that was fast."

― Ken L (Ken L), Wednesday, 2 March 2005 20:17 (twenty years ago)

Ah, yes - copyright.

Under current law, the very act of my writing the bugger gives me a defensible copyright. There's no need to do the mail-it-to-yourself rigamarole. Anyway, I will have 3 printed and bound copies in my possession, which rather shows precedence.

The real rub is defending it. If someone is detemined to shaft you and copy your copyrighted material, you have little recourse but to haul his arse into court - and that costs... big time.

― Aimless (Aimless), Wednesday, 2 March 2005 20:58 (twenty years ago)

im sharing this on soulseek if anyone wants it, username mark_p.

(congrats aimless.)

― mark p (Mark P), Wednesday, 2 March 2005 21:23 (twenty years ago)

Print a copy. Seal manuscript in envelope and mail to yourself. Poor man's copyright. Works in court of law.

Wait, I'm not sure that's ever been tested in a court of law. (I seem to recall that it's something of an urban myth.) Plus things like wayback and google cache wouldn't really make it necessary.

Aimless, consider if you dare the case of Mr. James Lileks, whose books have started out largely available on the web, where they have generated buzz, and then are published "for real" with some extra material.

I'm not advocating you do that, though. Congrats on the book!

― Casuistry (Chris P), Thursday, 3 March 2005 01:06 (twenty years ago)

Print a copy. Seal manuscript in envelope and mail to yourself. Poor man's copyright. Works in court of law.

Wait, I'm not sure that's ever been tested in a court of law. (I seem to recall that it's something of an urban myth.) Plus things like wayback and google cache wouldn't really make it necessary.

Well it would seem like the more proof you have available is better than assuming you have total control over your shit.

The other option is to send out a hard manuscript with reciept of a non-disclosure agreement.

― Jimmy Mod Has Returned With Spices And Silks (ModJ), Thursday, 3 March 2005 01:23 (twenty years ago)

another option, rather...

― Jimmy Mod Has Returned With Spices And Silks (ModJ), Thursday, 3 March 2005 01:23 (twenty years ago)

I shall consider sending the PDF email attachment to a couple of the folks who offered to read it for me. I want to sleep on it first. If I do decide to take up your kindly offers, you'll hear from me offline.

I do not fear putting a few electronic copies in selected hands. People on the whole are quite reluctant to screw you over - if they can be traced.

I will also consider the Lileks example, but not now. I would like to pursue the old-stylee method and see where it gets me before I get to thinking I can fly and I jump off the top of the Internet Building wearing a couple of paper wings.

― Aimless (Aimless), Thursday, 3 March 2005 01:34 (twenty years ago)

If you have friends (and I'm sure you do) who have a literary agent, use their name as an introduction in a cover letter and send off the first three chapters to five or six agents! This avoids your manuscript drowning in the slushpile of other manuscripts and will give you a quicker response. Good luck!

― pepektheassassin (pepektheassassin), Thursday, 3 March 2005 16:53 (twenty years ago)

Oh boy do I must read this. You'd do well sending a copy to Matt from Ask A Drunk as he's quite the writer and good at helpful crit.

― Lynskey (Lynskey), Thursday, 3 March 2005 17:00 (twenty years ago)

If your enthusiasm for reading this is in anticipation of it being written in the voice of Aimless (as seen on AAD), then you might be a tad bit disappointed. You would find faint tinges and echoes of AAD's Aimless, for sure, but there isn't any way to sustain the same concentrated pungency at book length. I can't, at least.

The narrative voice here is much more conventional, less prone to seeing bats, less sotted in absinthe, and possessing less of that cleansing acidity I know we both appreciate. Less durian fruit and more banana. It's just how the cookie crumbles.

― Aimless (Aimless), Thursday, 3 March 2005 19:57 (twenty years ago)

That's to be expected, Aimless, if only for the purposes of constructing an intelligble plot, but, still, I'm sure it has its funny moments, or at least crumbling banana cookies, whatever they are.

― Michael White (Hereward), Thursday, 3 March 2005 20:09 (twenty years ago)

six years pass...

After letting this molder for a few years, I've decided to just let the PDF of it fly free into the world. It ought to work ok on e-readers, such as the Kindle - but let me know if it doesn't.

So, now, for the first time ever available for free (a $14.34 value!) I bring you Escape On Foot, the chilling story of a man on vacation, who looks danger in the eye and spits contemptuously, leaving only a small amount on his own chin, easily wiped off with a contemptuous swipe of the back of his hand, while never flinching from his direct gaze in danger's eye. It's chilling!

Exclusively available at this fine link: http://www.4shared.com/office/l9nfi4pY/Escape_On_Foot.html

Or, if you want to see the pretty covers, or buy (heavens!) a paper copy, go to this link: http://www.cafepress.com/bmclaugh

― Aimless, Thursday, 12 January 2012 21:05 (thirteen years ago)

dropboxin it!

― TracerHandVEVO (Tracer Hand), Thursday, 12 January 2012 21:11 (thirteen years ago)

(basks in the warmth of his growing popularity as an author)

― Aimless, Thursday, 12 January 2012 21:39 (thirteen years ago)

For those who would like a bit more of an idea what the book is "about", including thrilling comments from several actual readers (I swear they are not actors I hired to impersonate readers), a certain amount of such useful info can be gleaned from this thread.

― Aimless, Thursday, 12 January 2012 21:44 (thirteen years ago)

Hey wait now we know who you are MR SO CALLED B**** M*********.

― Ned Raggett, Thursday, 12 January 2012 21:55 (thirteen years ago)

Your real name being Brett Beautiful.

― Ned Raggett, Thursday, 12 January 2012 21:55 (thirteen years ago)

You have discovered the easter egg, Mr. Raggett!

― Aimless, Thursday, 12 January 2012 23:15 (thirteen years ago)

Highly revelatory result for "Brett Beautiful":

http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7174/6727365295_19e36c6e8a_z.jpg

... but not one picture of a puppy. Not one! I'm crushed.

― Aimless, Thursday, 19 January 2012 20:53 (thirteen years ago)

three years pass...

After many years of procrastination, I used Calibre to make an epub of my book and put it on Dropbox. A link may be found in this thread. I'm pretty sure that thread will disappear from Site New Answers in nothing flat, but here in the quiet backwaters of ILB it mat be a bit more dilatory about its disappearance.

― Aimless, Friday, 27 November 2015 18:34 (nine years ago)

Oh, shit. This thread is on ILE, too. I can't win for losing.

― Aimless, Friday, 27 November 2015 18:36 (nine years ago)

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